THE CURIOUS INDEX IS ALIVE. BARELY.
The misspelling is appropriate, since it's as coordinated as the Florida offense was last night, and also the Florida defense, and special teams, and pretty much everything else. We'll be venting heavily in Blatant Homerism when we get around to it, but shit, was Teddy Bridgewater incredible last night. Do not lose sight of this: Florida turned in their most epically shitty bowl performance since the 2005 Peach Bowl, but they did it in collusion with the best quarterback they faced all year playing the best game he played all year.
On the other side, we had a horse trying to ride a balance ball, and the resulting LULZ.
AT THE NAVEL OF THE UNIVERSE. By that term, we mean the Krystal on Bourbon Street, where things were going as they usually do. (Strangely.)
GOOD TIMING, TAYLOR. Totally relevant to Louisville last night, though perhaps not so much to you after Nebraska gave up over 500 yards to Georgia, Mr. Martinez.
"I think the Big Ten, talent-wise, is a lot better, and the defenses in the Big Ten are better than SEC defenses," he said. "This was supposed to be one of the top defenses in the SEC, and we pretty much did anything we wanted against them."
THEY'LL JUST BE LUCKY TO SCORE A FEW POINTS. Bill Snyder is the master of the poormouth.
ETC. Big Boi KILLIN' IT ON LETTERMAN. Remind us to pick up a copy of the new NHL game. In defense of the NBC Sports Network. Drew Magary got high with Snoop Dogg, and this really did happen. MYSTIKAL, BITCH.