WEST VIRGINIA MAKES DOWN PAYMENT ON MANSION OF GREATNESS

Dana Holgorsen got a six year contract extension today from his employers at West Virginia University. The deal is standard in terms of money: $2.3 million a year plus bonuses, along with the clauses about "moral turpitude" allowing the university fo fire him for "habitual drunkenness" or other things we tend to like people for doing. He's now paid roughly the same amount of money as Charlie Strong at Louisville, and more than Rich Rodriguez ever earned there for coaching football. (Rodriguez made around $2 million a year in his tenure.

You're damn right there are perks.

a.

Getoutofjail_medium

b. $50,000 raise for Coach Cool Dog I Found At The Bus Station

c. Use of a helicopter, this time without the breathalyzer

d. (illegible scribbling) laser (more illegible scribbling) condoms

e. By law, can force dealers in WV casinos to hit on 19.

f. $30,000 promotion bonus from Commando, the official undergarment status of West Virginia Athletics

g. Get to stay up as late as he wants and not brush his teeth

h. Dyson vacuum cleaners everywhere. Don't ask why.

i. Discretionary use of the Mountaineer's musket.

j. If it happens on the Morgantown Personal Rapid Transit System, it STAYS on the Morgantown Personal Rapid Transit System.

k. SUPERLAB UNDER THE LAUNDROMAT

l. Gets to use the can at Oliver Luck's house whenever he wants, no questions asked.

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

Join Every Day Should Be Saturday

You must be a member of Every Day Should Be Saturday to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Every Day Should Be Saturday. You should read them.

Join Every Day Should Be Saturday

You must be a member of Every Day Should Be Saturday to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Every Day Should Be Saturday. You should read them.

Spinner

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9341_tracker