THE CURIOUS INDEX, 2/9/2012

THEY CALL ME 8-BALL/ I'M SELLING 8-BALL/ AND YOU NEED 8 BALLS/ TO HANG WITH 8-BALL.

We don't even know what you're trying to do here, Mr. Ross, but it's certainly confusing especially given your ties to the Miami area. Then again, South Carolina fans already leapt to the joke about a parole officer supporting the Clemson football program, so perhaps this has already served its purpose. (This would not be a factual joke, as Clemson has made few appearances in the Fulmer Cup.) He also has a Florida State medallion, and it's pretty clear that Rick Ross is now officially the most ACC rapper ever.

THE BIG EAST HAS NOW CROSSED THE BORDER INTO PATHOS COUNTY. West Virginia is, as of last night's deadlines at least, close to securing a number for their buyout from the Big East. The magic number is $11 million or so, and since they can't invite LSU fans to drink beer at every home game Oliver Luck will be getting that money from [REDACTED you really don't want to know seriously it involves coal mines and toxic waste and the mafia and some things are better unsaid.]

This isn't very nice, but most honest things aren't:

In a lawsuit filed in Monongalia County Circuit Court, WVU alleged the Big East had breached its contract with WVU and nullified the bylaws that spell out the waiting period. WVU said the Big East had failed to "maintain, let alone enhance the quality of competition in the league" as it sustained membership losses.

As a result of the losses, Rutgers and Syracuse may have to play each other twice next year. We're just sad at this point for the Big East, and for the football fans who actually care about things like not having to declass to grandiose Conference-USAism to continue playing football--and not BCS football, because that bid is as good as gone, and now we're just...jesus. Antidote, please:

That helps (a little, and just a little.)

THE SIXTH YEAR APPROVALS ARE ROLLING NOW. The latest beneficiary of the NCAA going through their paperwork is LSU O-lineman Josh Dworaczyk, who was approved for a sixth year after missing the season due to a torn ACL sustained in fall camp. Dworaczyk had the unique experience of serving as a proxy o-line coach on the sidelines during the season, so if you were hoping to read "The LSU offensive line got dumber and less deep" headline this morning, you should be very disappointed indeed. Teammates celebrated with gusto. (Via Reddit/CFB)

WE AIN'T SKEERED. Hey, new guy at the office. We're gonna need you to go to Omaha on Christmas Eve, figuratively speaking. Texas A&M has four home games in their current schedule, and you're going to have to go to Davenport for the sales convention on January 3rd and fly one of those horrible commuter planes that feels seconds away from crashing at any instant. Being the new guy RULES, Aggies.

SIPPY CUPS ALL AROUND. Well, aren't we looking young, college football coaching? [/preens in mirror]

A LONG LIST OF MOSTLY GEEKY BUT INCREDIBLE THINGS: Sewer play is not encouraged in China. Lauryn Hill on acid is as bad as you would imagine. Baltimore's tattoo artists can put Natty Bo's logo on your body. ROBOTS ARE IN YOUR BODY. This blog will publish any important railgun news it can get its hands on at any time. LOL, just bein' Scandinavian guyz.

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