Truly, the Blind Oracle astounds and amazes. Despite Zeus' most vexing interference last week, the Oracle's trendy frames saw that which was destined. But Lo! The Oracle does not shy from a challenge, even one so mighty as to confound his Transitions® Lenses.
Now, prepare as the Blind Oracle enters his trance for all of Saturn's Day, whether you like it or not...
"Under the cover of darkness, march to the north. Comport thyself in the Rock of the Sham and the shoulder stripes of the Incredible Mediocrity, for the people of the stolen helmets swarm like unto bumblebees. A battle in the Great Sinkhole, in which the Nielsen Ratings and passes plunge like the souls of the damned into the chasm. Bottom line, the Irish lack the team speed to keep up with the Wolverines. Michigan beats Notre Dame, 35-10."