THE CURIOUS INDEX, 9/2/2011
by Spencer Hall on Sep 2, 2011 9:57 AM EDT
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PrintLIVE FROM NASHVILLE OH GOD COVER YOUR EYES PLEASE WE REGRET EVERY TELEVISING A SECOND OF THIS.
Kentucky is supposed to be SEC, yes, but in case you're unaware we will inform you of the Curley Hallman Monkey's Paw. Once Curley Hallman, former SEC football coach and grown man named "Curley," brought back a cursed monkey's paw from his travels in "the Orient." For Hallman, that meant "thrift shops in Mississippi," but we all have our understanding of the outside world, and we'll forgive him that.
Anyway, as part of the SEC's basic charter, this monkey's paw is passed between SEC teams randomly, and affects the bearer of the paw by instantly crippling the team's offense. This touchdown anemia lasts for the duration of an entire season, and possibly longer if the paw decides it likes you.
The paw loooooved Sylvester Croom, who thought it was a nice paperweight and just kept it around without ever reading the helpful pamphlet that came with it, "The SEC's Monkey's Paw And Why Your Team Pees On Its Own Shoes Every Time It Tries To Piss Past Their Own 40 Yard Line." Like most coaches, he wasn't a big reader. Florida had it last year, and upon his resignation to accept the Temple game Steve Addazio mailed it to Joker Phillips.
Last night Addazio's Temple team scored 42 points against Villanova. Kentucky scored a fat 14 against Western Kentucky, and was outgained by the Western Kentucky Hilltoppers in every important offensive category. This included turnovers, and that's why they still won 14-3, but let it be known: Kentucky is holding the Curley Hallman Monkey's Paw this year. If a FedEx arrives to your football team's offices from Lexington, immediately forward it to your rival, and then write us a thank you note for saving your season. Don't help them share the Cat-tastrophe.
NEVER IN DOUBT. Syracuse enjoyed a calm, controlled, and easy scrimmage against Wake Forest last night.
WE'LL GET THAT FIXED. Georgia Tech passed--that is correct, the thingy where you take the ball and sort of just throw the ball up in the air and hope it goes to someone you're looking at--they ppassed for over 300 yards last night against Western Carolina. Paul Johnson apologizes wholeheartedly, and promises you will never see this disgusting display ever again. (This is fiction. Paul Johnson doesn't give a fluorescent rat's ass what you think. He got the fluorescent rat's ass from the labs at Georgia Tech. Don't ask why they have some. It's very important and has something to do with freedom and America.)
WE KNOW HOW THIS IS HAPPENING. Mississippi State scored over fifty points because they have someone who can call an offensive football game and Costco Tebow, and because Dan Mullen is the tits, but watch everyone who didn't know this marvel at this new coaching wonder anyway.
CHEESETOAST YOU DID WELL. ALL RUSSELL WILSON EVERYTHING. There are only two bad items from Wisconsin steamrolling UNLV. First, Rece Davis said nothing during footage of Craig James deftly carrying a person sized sandbag up stairs at Camp Randall, leading us to believe he was silently connecting the dots between his broadcast partner and the Highland Park Ripper. (He shouldn't! It's not true.) Second, Wisconsin's defense did allow perhaps a few too many yards, and that might be an issue once they start playing teams not named UNLV. Other than that, Private Cheese Toast acquitted himself beautifully, and tubas paraded around playing "Roll Out The Barrel" while Badger fans did a shot. How many shots? ALL OF THE SHOTS.
BURFICT HOMICIDE WATCH: Zero homicides, zero penalty flags, and three sacks against UC-Davis last night. Good Burfict! [/throws huge slab of grass-fed beef at him, runs]
READ THIS. But don't, but read it, and shit it's sad as hell but just read it.
LUKE, VIA IM THIS MORNING: "LOL Gerry DiNardo got into the sherm this morning, brah." Luke also, in his duties as the architect of Queefcore Studies, points out that ESPN is so driving the movement here.
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OLD SOUTH!!!
COME OUT TO PLAY-AY-AYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
by saxattack29 on Sep 2, 2011 10:00 AM EDT reply actions 4 recs
You know that poor bastard is so boozed up he's flammable right now.
by Albino Tornado on Sep 2, 2011 10:03 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I imagine he feels like this
Dayman, Fighter of the Nightman, Champion of the Sun
by btcoop71 on Sep 2, 2011 10:04 AM EDT up reply actions 12 recs
The colors
Are wrong on those children
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:07 AM EDT up reply actions
Well, the shirt should be red
and the silver helmet is missing.
This will not end well.....
All teeth and claws and evisceration outta fucking nowhere.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:48 AM EDT up reply actions
At least I got "////Western Kentucky loses" right last night.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
gotdamn parlay busters..
8/17/11 Nick Bloomfield on Finebaum. I WAS THERE.
by Sasquatch Love on Sep 2, 2011 10:30 AM EDT up reply actions
Kentucky-Louisville may not necesarily be cause for celebration
But there will be drinking. Heavy, sorrow-hiding drinking.
Sad kitties everywhere. Lots of DERP to correct for both squads. (Squeee threw a pass that sailed straight up 2 feet, then fell to the ground like a sad Sputnik for an easy Murray fumble. Yikes)
Maybe Joker and Strong can just arm-wrestle for the win?
by JHGraas on Sep 2, 2011 10:46 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Upon first viewing Wilson with Wisconsin
I immediately thought “I don’t think that I can ever call this guy anything buy Cheese Toast.”
/luv you EDSBS
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
I can neither confirm nor deny rumors that I may have been drunkenly yelling "Cheese Toast!" any time Wilson did anything productive last night.
However, the crowd at the Arrow Sports Club bar and grill seem to like the idea of calling Wilson “Cheese Taost”, and others may have been drunkenlyshouting it as well last night.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:09 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
so, I know I should know this
but I don’t actually know who cheese toast is, Russel Wilson?
I remember a post, but I usually see cheese toast references with that picture of the dog in goggles
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
ehem, mornings
I mean to say I don’t remember why Wilson is cheese toast.
And the dog thing still confuses me
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
Lt. War Dog Eagle
instructed Russell Wilson, code name Cheese Toast, to attend Auburn.
Cheese Toast did not comply.
This will not end well.
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 10:11 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Lt. WDE's own fault.
You choose codename “Cheese Toast” when your competition is Wisconsin? Bad planning, Lt. WDE, bad planning.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:15 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Brian Calhoun still haunts Lt. WDE's dreams
Author at Acme Packing Company
by texwestern on Sep 2, 2011 10:22 AM EDT up reply actions 8 recs
That is the awesomest gif ever.
By a wide margin.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:23 AM EDT up reply actions
And that is the awesomest sig line ever.
Nobody doesn’t love Sterling Archer.
Author at Acme Packing Company
thought he looked great last night
it’s great to see the QB standing in a pocket that suddenly opens up, then see him actually take off downfield for a huge gain.
also hopefully in future games our defense will actually be prepared for the offense they’re facing. apparently what UNLV pulled out last night was not what our D had been looking at for 2 weeks of practice lol
by vlad3217 on Sep 2, 2011 10:22 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I offer my sincerest and humblest apology for last night's embarassment
I think there should also be a gif of Morgan Newton overthrowing his receiver….that was 4 yards in front of him.
Dayman, Fighter of the Nightman, Champion of the Sun
It was like watching a car crash
You didn’t want to look, but you couldn’t stop looking either
Dayman, Fighter of the Nightman, Champion of the Sun
by btcoop71 on Sep 2, 2011 10:03 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
at least in a carcrash someone has to pay for their stupidity
last night just kept going on and on. finally, thankfully, the refs made them pick a winner.
That play summed up his night
The third-and-one where the center, the playside tackle, and both guards each got obliterated by their D-line for a 3-yard loss summed up their night. And every play involving Roark summed up his.
1950 NCAA Co-National Champions
by Old South on Sep 2, 2011 10:22 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
The OL was abused....by WKU
We might not win a SEC game….
Dayman, Fighter of the Nightman, Champion of the Sun
by btcoop71 on Sep 2, 2011 10:43 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
If the line keeps playing like that then we'll be seeing a lot of Maxwell Smith and Bookie at QB
Morgan Newton will not survive more than a few games with the hits he’ll be taking.
On the plus side, Louisville looked bad.
1950 NCAA Co-National Champions
by Old South on Sep 2, 2011 10:45 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Over/Under on points scored in UK/Louisville game?
I’m setting it at 9.5….total
Dayman, Fighter of the Nightman, Champion of the Sun
Sunny Will and Morgan Newton will have a Derp Off
Dayman, Fighter of the Nightman, Champion of the Sun
Sunny Will Stein
Actually looked good. It’s the derp freshman who will have a derp off
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:51 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
He had some derpness
Dayman, Fighter of the Nightman, Champion of the Sun
by btcoop71 on Sep 2, 2011 10:52 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
That is
squee-erpiness, thank you very much.
DOT EEE DEE EWE!!!
by Anthropologal on Sep 2, 2011 11:50 AM EDT up reply actions
I'm torn on them
Hatcher was a great coach at Valdosta State, but his tenure at Georgia Southern was unbearable. I wish him the best, but I just don’t know that he’s going to do too well anywhere as long as he still has the same incompetent guy running his defenses. And his offense is predictable as all get out.
Chairman of the Frivolous And Wasteful Committee On Avocado Peels (FAWCOAP).
by AUTigerGSUEagle on Sep 2, 2011 2:59 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
145. Thinking UK wins 74-71.
Wait, you meant football…
by ElRocco337 on Sep 2, 2011 10:49 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Will Charlie Strong wear an all white suit on the sidelines?
Because he’d be the biggest pimp if he did.
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:50 AM EDT up reply actions
I'll say Louisville wins in a romp IF (and only if) Charlie Strong doesn't juggle QBs.
Once he took out Will Stein Louisville’s offense never looked even decent again.
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
SEC game??
I realize its early, but show me one game on the schedule they should be favoured in, remembering that Jax St beat a much more experienced Ole Miss team last season…
After last night, I'd say Kentucky winless in SEC and WKU beats FIU for Sun Belt title.
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
That would have gotten him a nomination for "Derp of the Decade"
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
Was that worse than Tennessee playing with 13 guys on the field?
by ElRocco337 on Sep 2, 2011 10:06 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I have a vague alcohol affected recollection
of Reggie Ball stepping out of the back of the end zone on a drop-back for a safety.
Anyone else recall that piece of Reggie lore?
so were they playing in defense with 9 guys
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Lloyd, Andy Russell, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene, Curtis Martin, Willie Roaf, Andre Reed and Jerry Kramer
CM PUNK IS MY HERO
Canal Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions
Rutgers at least looked like they had life last night.
They obliterated their cupcake unlike…Kentucky, Louisville, Utah, Central Michigan
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
Dan Orlovsky approves of this message.
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 10:05 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Sorry for NFL
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 10:11 AM EDT up reply actions 9 recs
It had to be Jared Allen.
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
He ran from Jared!
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 10:12 AM EDT up reply actions 12 recs
How can you people rec the first reply and not the second one?
Or did you change the channel before the second overly excited repetitive person spoke?
Ask me about the death of five hookers and how Craig James was allegedly involved.
by IsayPetrinoYouSayPaterno on Sep 2, 2011 12:30 PM EDT up reply actions
You'd run out of bounds too if your line looked like this
Credit to Chris Gorvich/BSD
"I'm colonel cool! And I'm the captain on this rocket to the stars!"
by psuphiman80 on Sep 2, 2011 10:14 AM EDT up reply actions 8 recs
If you watched 2010 Longhorns at all
you’d know how well I understand this.
/blames Gilbert and GD anyway
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
I thought the turnstile played tackle, not guard.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:16 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I was into running out the back of the endzone
Before it was cool.
by hwoodworth86 on Sep 2, 2011 10:16 AM EDT up reply actions 7 recs
Context, btw:
“Ball inexplicably ran out of the back of the end zone in the third quarter to give Virginia Tech a safety. The Hokies had to settle for a field goal early in the fourth quarter after having first-and-goal inside the Georgia Tech 1.”
by hwoodworth86 on Sep 2, 2011 10:19 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
GOD DAMN IT REGGIE
There you are, ruining everything AGAIN.
My years in marching band have made me an authority on football.
Oh, and I have a Twitter.
by MagnaCarterGT on Sep 2, 2011 10:33 AM EDT up reply actions
Some things
We can never get rid of or truly forget. Like herpes, or killing 5 hookers, or 4 years of Reggie Ball as a starting quarterback, which is actually the worst of the three.
by hwoodworth86 on Sep 2, 2011 10:35 AM EDT up reply actions
BEERCHEESETOASTMEAT
Is the new official name of Wisconsin’s offense.
Chairwoman of the "Blood Is Thicker Than Tuition Money" Committee for Fan Bigamy
If cheesetoast is to be incorporated into the name
Then I propose rearranging the words. It’s a bit cumbersome in the middle like that.
BEERMEATCHEESETOAST
Greyshirted No More
Black Shoe Diaries
@runthedive
This can work. LET'S TAKE A VOTE!
Chairwoman of the "Blood Is Thicker Than Tuition Money" Committee for Fan Bigamy
Does the bidding
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
by saxattack29 on Sep 2, 2011 10:13 AM EDT up reply actions 4 recs
I'm very happy to see that Syracuse didn't embarrass themselves last night.....
Oh wait, OT against Wake fuckin’ Forest?
I guess they did after all.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:03 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
It took us 3 quarters
To start playing football
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:10 AM EDT up reply actions
See, I kinda think of that as embarassing Wake Forest, not Syracuse.
Can we just agree that both teams are kind of embarassing?
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:29 AM EDT up reply actions
I am too.....
I am not a conference homer, but having teams in our conference win their OOC games makes my Mountaineers SOS look much better.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:40 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Oh, you are too.
When we go hunting for Eers, we use “Big East sucks” as trap bait. Works every time.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
/remembers that Uconn got the Big East's BCS bid last year
THE BIG EAST SUCKS
by Truffle Shuffle on Sep 2, 2011 10:42 AM EDT up reply actions
I'M NOT STUCK IN HERE WITH YOU
YOU’RE STUCK IN HERE WITH ME
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:43 AM EDT up reply actions 4 recs
that was by far the best scene, though
"I am a sinner that does not expect forgiveness. But I am not a government official."
by whiskey_soup on Sep 2, 2011 11:55 AM EDT up reply actions
I disagree, but respectfully.
I can understand the viewpoint of the movie haters but don’t agree with it.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
based on Wake / Cuse result guess that means
acc swallows
Son, that’s Pitt. You hate Pitt now. You hate Pitt tomorrow. You hate Pitt until the day you die. After that, you will hate Pitt for eternity.’ — Jack Fleming’s Mom
Yes!
Because having the dregs of the conference determine overall conference strength is a great way to go about things.
Honestly, I think it works better than, say
determining the ACC’s strength by their best team pre-expansion.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
I agree
but the media wants to have it both ways.
You always hear now about how the ACC champ is never in national title contention. But back then, the ACC was weak despite the fact that the champ was always in national title contention.
If they were honest, they would admit they are actually judging on stadium size and then making up justifications.
the secret ingredient is ... love?!
by gtne91 on Sep 2, 2011 11:44 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Stadium size is a bullshit metric.
You can have a great program and play in a 20,000 seat stadium if you don’t give a shit about the student experience and have fans who can afford ridiculous ticket prices.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Yes.
Case in point: Duke University Men’s Basketball
by SuperJew on Sep 2, 2011 11:49 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You're half right there.
Duke squeezes unbelievable amounts of money out of its Iron Duke donors and season ticket holders, but the student experience (Jon’s point above) is fantastic.
Since the undergrad population is tiny, Cameron’s big enough to reasonably accommodate the students for everything except the UNC game, and it’s hard to beat the price.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 11:54 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Of course it is bullshit
But there is a reason the B1G has been getting love the last 1/2 decade or so despite being mediocre. And back before their very legit run as #1 conference, the SEC wasnt considered the #3 or #4 conference any of those years where they were that.
the secret ingredient is ... love?!
/that's my point
Son, that’s Pitt. You hate Pitt now. You hate Pitt tomorrow. You hate Pitt until the day you die. After that, you will hate Pitt for eternity.’ — Jack Fleming’s Mom
Ive always thought they should count just as much as the teams at the top
I also always liked the Sagarin way of weighting the middle teams stronger in determining conference strength.
the secret ingredient is ... love?!
said it last night:
no one wins the big east, only escapes it.
Oh, and the moon sometimes also looks like a C, but you can't eat that.
by Illusions, Michael. on Sep 2, 2011 10:44 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
New HC, new offensive staff, new OFFENSE installed at WfnVU?
I’d wait before casting DERPstones at anyone else’s DERPcastle.
You could hire a baboon, and you should win eight games.
-- Former WVU Heach Coach Don Nehlen on playing in the current Big East
by An 'eer with a beer on Sep 2, 2011 11:45 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Past results may not be indicative of future potential......
Yeah. I get it. But, everywhere Holgorsen’s been as an OC their offensive production has gone up, way up in most cases.
The Mumme-Leach Air Raid is based on simple sets with players who play from the same positions all the time. We have the skill players to run Holgorsen’s modified Air Raid. The O line is going back to the zone blocking scheme they used to be good at. What’s not to be excited about.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 12:21 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
They were lucky to get it to overtime. Also, Wake might turn out to be solid.
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
Looks like ESPN and Warner Brothers should have saved Switchfoot
for Morgan Newton.
Do. Not. Eff. This. Up.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Sep 2, 2011 10:03 AM EDT reply actions 4 recs
Hey ACS . . .
you ever been to Cambodia?
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
boom rec'd
"I am a sinner that does not expect forgiveness. But I am not a government official."
by whiskey_soup on Sep 2, 2011 11:56 AM EDT up reply actions
Can't wait for tomorrow....
I can haz a beer in peace? NO F U, BABY CRYING
I can haz a good night sleep? NO F U, BABY CRYING EVERY 90 MINUTES
I can haz a fall weather? NO F U, HOT AND HUMID
I can haz a early dismissal? NO F U, AFTERNOON CLIENT CONFERENCE CALL
I can haz a drinj tonight? NO F U, PICK UP WIFE’S FAMILY AT AIRPORT AT 11 PM
Plz to have all the Bourbonz tomorrow.
by Cock D on Sep 2, 2011 10:04 AM EDT reply actions 3 recs
That was me last night...
IT"S FOOTBAWWWW…DON’T CARE HOLD BABY, WHILE I GET A BOTTLE READY.
I can go in other room and watch football….NO, U CAN HAZ GUILT TRIP AND DANCE MOMS.
I can enjoy football now…NO COME HERE, BABY DID SOMETHING CUTE NEED TO SEE.
I can enjoy it now….NOPE, NEEDZ YOU TO TAKE PICTS OF CUTE BABY.
…..PIC NOT GOOD ENOUGH, TAKE ANOTHER.
…..PIC NO GOODZ TAKE ANOTHER.
….SIGH, IF YOU AREN’T GOING TO TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY, GIVE ME CAMERA, STAND THERE.
Football now, please….NOPE BABY BATH TIME.
Okay, now football?…….NOPE NEED YOU TO TURN ON HUMIDIFIER.
OKAY NOW????…..YES, BUT IN THE DEN AND YOU HAVE TO HAVE TV ON MUTE.
by wayxdawg on Sep 2, 2011 11:51 AM EDT up reply actions 4 recs
Didn't we already have this conversation this week?
Even if you don’t have Tivo, all these things could be done in the same room as the tv, and there are some women who understand and even encourage simultaneous baby tending and football watching. Unfortunately, it sounds like you chose poorly on that count.
by DiamondM on Sep 2, 2011 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You do realize this was posted mostly for the LULZ
right? I’ll be drinking Jack and Coke with the lovely lady wife (well she won’t be, breastfeeding) starting at 11:00 A.M. on Saturday and continuing. With the baby. With the wife. And with the T.V. in the same room. But, you know, thanks for the parenting tips as well as your opinion as to my marital bliss. Carry on.
Yes I do...
as was mine. No offense intended. And I can respect a man who defends his woman like this when others join in on the LULZ at her expense. Carrying on commenced…
Son, anywhere in the South that'd be....
grounds for Dee-vorce without alimony.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Im just gonna leave this here
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 12:15 PM EDT up reply actions 12 recs
I didn't understand
Was he the girls, or the cat?
by Tanner B on Sep 2, 2011 1:41 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
And by the way...
babies do not need tip toe silence to sleep. But if you train them to need it, then they always will.
Thanks to 3 years of training, I have a child that can sleep through just about anything, especially live or televised sporting events.
by DiamondM on Sep 2, 2011 12:35 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
If anything, we had the opposite issue
As a toddler, one of my boys always wanted the fan on in his room for the background white noise when napping. Using that method, though, allows you to have some other things going on in the house (TV, dishwasher, washer and dryer) without disturbing your napper.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 12:39 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Yup - you guessed it
Client cancelled call, pushed it later in evening. Thanks, guy’s you’re swell.
/schedules my next call with them at 8AM my time (7AM theirs)…
Oh yeah son
Drink it in. Or not. Paul Johnson doesn’t give a f—k.
by hwoodworth86 on Sep 2, 2011 10:05 AM EDT reply actions 20 recs
Dogs and cats, living together... mass hysteria!!
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 10:06 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Everything was going just fine until Dickless here screwed it up.
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 10:25 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Yes, your honor, it's true.
This man has no dick.
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 10:26 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I'm gonna get him a nice fruit basket.
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 10:27 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Ray, when a ghost asks you if you're a god...
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
by Go Big Rev on Sep 2, 2011 10:34 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I tried to think of the most harmless thing. Something I loved from my childhood. Something that could never, ever possibly destroy us.
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:35 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 10:37 AM EDT up reply actions 17 recs
I will never be able to watch Ghostbusters now
Without imagining Sunny Will Stein in the Stay Puft Man’s place.
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:40 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Hey this guy's alright.
He’s a sailor, he’s from out of town. If we get him laid everything will be allright!
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 10:38 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Usually doesn't work that way....
You get us laid and we’re still liable to drink up all your booze, eat all your food and piss in the hallway.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:42 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Fucking officers getting caught raiding the candy jar.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:52 AM EDT up reply actions
I know, was trying to riff on you line.
A friend of my dad’s had MCAS Beaufort when that went down. I guess they hadn’t gotten the message that the Great Santini was no longer the role model for the modern warrior.
Velocitas eradico
SQUEEEEEEEE!
Seriously, the few minutes of the Louisville game that I got to see, that’s all my brain could do when Louisville had the ball. Even when I could see former Nebraska OC Shawn Watson coaching him up, it was basically “SQUEEEEEE-hey, there’s Watson-EEEEEEEEE”
damn you, allicollis – you made me think like a girl.
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
Anthro started the "Squeee"
and as usual ’round these parts, we all ran with it.
Yo, don't say nuthin'. I guess I'm just a freak.
That's squeetastic.
DOT EEE DEE EWE!!!
by Anthropologal on Sep 2, 2011 11:51 AM EDT up reply actions
Oh it happened...
It was fantastic. That whole week was magical then I came home to a shitstorm of problems. College football take me away!
DOT EEE DEE EWE!!!
by Anthropologal on Sep 2, 2011 12:00 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
As Clausewitz said
“war is politics by other means,” so too does Paul Johnson say, “passing is the ground game by other means. FUCK YOU.”
I'm white and I don't dance but that doesn't mean I have all the answers.
by smk73 on Sep 2, 2011 10:11 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
That 82 yard pass
was a quick pass to WR, stiff arm CB who was giving up 9 inches on WR, then sprint to endzone.
So, basically, ground game by other means.
the secret ingredient is ... love?!
by gtne91 on Sep 2, 2011 10:29 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Breakdown of a GT 82 yard pass
So, ummm, MR. WCU coach, why no safety helping out, because clearly that was going to happen eventually.
the secret ingredient is ... love?!
by gtne91 on Sep 2, 2011 10:44 AM EDT up reply actions 5 recs
that is the saddest DB picture ever
I just imagine
“I’m gonna get you.. Im gonna get y… awww short T-Rex arms :(”
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 10:45 AM EDT up reply actions 8 recs
armbar to the face?
facelift barred?
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 10:46 AM EDT up reply actions 5 recs
Must be Asaph Schwapp's cousin or something.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 10:47 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I don't usually get to make the Schwapp tiny t-rex arms joke.
Had to grab the opportunity while I could, before ACS swooped in.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
I used to mess with him when we were drunk
Yo ace, grab this "puts something about 8 inches in front of him, dead center left to right.
Ace tries and cannot close to less than a 6 inch spot where his pecs werent in the way of his arms.
Ace says lolfu
repeat
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 10:50 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I'm just not sure, how well this plan was thought through
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:49 AM EDT up reply actions 7 recs
The wiggling of the arms gets me every time!
Chairwoman of the "Blood Is Thicker Than Tuition Money" Committee for Fan Bigamy
by allicolls on Sep 2, 2011 10:54 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
rec'd for one of my top 10 favorite movies
not even close to kidding
by vegas_buckeye on Sep 2, 2011 11:21 AM EDT up reply actions
what movie is it?
"Hello, Nicholas Sparks. My pets adore your children's books." -Spencer Hall
Also, Fuck Clemson.
by Gamecock2002 on Sep 2, 2011 11:23 AM EDT up reply actions
One of the Toy Stories.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 11:39 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Subtle trolling is subtle
You could hire a baboon, and you should win eight games.
-- Former WVU Heach Coach Don Nehlen on playing in the current Big East
by An 'eer with a beer on Sep 2, 2011 11:50 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Question for the commentariat.
I never watched this movie because I was warned it had a pretty strong anti-adoption message.
True?
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
not sure
(this is hard to discuss without giving up plot points in the movie for those who haven’t seen it)
I hadn’t really considered it before, but I suppose someone sensitive to the issue may find offense in it. I don’t think it’s an anti-adoption message, per se, but I think someone could read a message about fostering / fostered children and possibly some of the parents who wish to adopt.
It’s one of my favorite movies for the message of “Keep Moving Forward.” There’s a tone of “things you make may fail, but you should learn from and celebrate your failures – then use that to move on.” All in all, it’s a pretty silly movie with some really fun characters.
DISCLAIMER:I wasn’t raised in as a foster child, so my sensitivity to that aspect of the movie was low.
by vegas_buckeye on Sep 2, 2011 1:53 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Is this a metaphor for a gus Malzahn offense led by Barret Trotter?
What's the deal with observational comedy?
by The Assman 1 on Sep 2, 2011 11:23 AM EDT up reply actions
Trotter is actually pretty mobile and supposedly pretty accurate, too
I believe the description you were look for was “Gus Malzahn offense run by Chris Todd.” And that offense still broke records at Auburn.
Chairman of the Frivolous And Wasteful Committee On Avocado Peels (FAWCOAP).
by AUTigerGSUEagle on Sep 2, 2011 3:06 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
*ahem* FSU fans have felt worse pain
I started with the firm conviction that when I came to the end, I wanted to be regretting the things that I had done, not the things I hadn't.
by Klimt on Sep 2, 2011 5:12 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
this goes here
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 10:47 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
shit fuck ass
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 10:47 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
You rang?
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
by DONSLIQ on Sep 2, 2011 11:11 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
How did Nick Saban end up in this thread?
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 11:13 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Check your source
A common misquotation. Clausewitz used the word “Policy”, not politics. Policy is a principle or rule to guide towards a desired end. Politics is the process for collective decision making.
If you wish
As a retired Army officer, I like to think of it as clarifying something that touched my former profession.
Personally, I feel if you bother to use quotation marks, you ought to at least ensure you’re actually quoting.
by sullivan013 on Sep 2, 2011 10:40 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Attention on deck!
von Clausewitz will now tell us who the real enemy is.
von?
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
Not a problem
I went to Auburn. A thick skin is a prerequisite. But I have my pet peeves, and misquotations are one of them.
Hey, I clerk for a judge.
You should she how often she edits an order in which I (politely) savage an attorney who cites a case for the wrong proposition, or even misquotes the judge’s previous order.
by mnHorn on Sep 2, 2011 11:08 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Lighten up, Francis
Clausewitz said what he said in German. So the connotations of politics/policy are not exactly parallel to their English equivalents.
Either love your players or get out of coaching.
I stand corrected
Sie haben richtig, aber “Staatspolitik” ist ‘policy’ auf gut Deutsch, nicht wahr?
I think I've seen a move about your old unit
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 11:03 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You did
When I was enlisted, I went to basic in that same set of barracks. 1982 at Fort Knox.
That movie
introduced me to a liftetime of referring to people I don’t like as “suckholes”.
Handbags at dawn, sirrah.
by ChocolateCity on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
But it comes with a free forgurt!
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Sep 2, 2011 10:06 AM EDT reply actions 3 recs
that's good!
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
by saxattack29 on Sep 2, 2011 10:07 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
The frogurt is also cursed.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Sep 2, 2011 10:07 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
That's bad.
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
by saxattack29 on Sep 2, 2011 10:08 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
But you get your choice of toppings.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Sep 2, 2011 10:08 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
That's good!
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
by saxattack29 on Sep 2, 2011 10:10 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Sep 2, 2011 10:10 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Oh.
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
by saxattack29 on Sep 2, 2011 10:12 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Can I go now?
That Hokie freshman in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters didn't see any of this coming.
by JoshCVT on Sep 2, 2011 10:21 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
sax
If you are stopping by my tailgate with that shirt, you could probably bring 1-2 L and XLs and sell a few, I know my uncle would be likely to want one, at aminimum
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
I'll be bringing a backpack full of 'em
I’ll be emailing you my phone # for coordination purposes.
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
What are these t-shirts?
Can haz relevant details at pakspam@gmail.com? I’ll reply from my non-spambucket email account. Too much identifiable info in my real email accounts.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
CALM, EASY SCRIMMAGE? LOL FUCK WAKE!
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:06 AM EDT reply actions 3 recs
I prefer
To not permanently mar my love of Christina
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:11 AM EDT up reply actions
The Freek'd one has ruined it for me
Now I can’t has a happee until I see who’s head is on dat ass.
by commodore_dude on Sep 2, 2011 10:14 AM EDT up reply actions
Is it strange that I not give a damn whose head is on that ass?
/paperbag.jpg
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
by DONSLIQ on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
My sentiments exactly....
/place face down
//turn out the lights
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 11:16 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I was thinking more of Zappa's line from Dinah Moe Humm....
She was buns up and kneelin’
I was wheelin’ ‘n dealin’
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 11:27 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
To the bunks... again.
Handbags at dawn, sirrah.
by ChocolateCity on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Would.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:17 AM EDT up reply actions
Gives a whole new meaning to Big Orange Country.
Either love your players or get out of coaching.
by Golden Hand on Sep 2, 2011 12:51 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Meanwhile, in Columbia:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
by Gamecock'n'Balls on Sep 2, 2011 10:07 AM EDT reply actions 4 recs
No reflection of Shaw in the mirror
HE’S A VAMPIRE!!!
by Broncanous Mendenhall on Sep 2, 2011 10:34 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Who's lying on the floor with a bottle of Jack Black in the mirror?
You could hire a baboon, and you should win eight games.
-- Former WVU Heach Coach Don Nehlen on playing in the current Big East
by An 'eer with a beer on Sep 2, 2011 11:52 AM EDT up reply actions
Capt. Willard
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 12:12 PM EDT up reply actions
Oh I'm just fine everyone thanks for asking
1950 NCAA Co-National Champions
by Old South on Sep 2, 2011 10:07 AM EDT reply actions 10 recs
That's what a move to the Big 12-3 looks like.
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 10:08 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
If you want to feel better...
…Ryan Mossakowski apparently had 7 TDs in his JUCO debut last night…
Dayman, Fighter of the Nightman, Champion of the Sun
by btcoop71 on Sep 2, 2011 10:09 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
What? Your team won.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:32 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Line for bitterness forms at the rear
follow us @rubrchickens
by rubrchickens on Sep 2, 2011 11:01 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
The CI is about actual football games being played woooooo
by softbatch on Sep 2, 2011 10:11 AM EDT reply actions 2 recs
Finally, FOOTBALL results to talk about. Scores n stuff.
So excited you guys. Can’t wait for the weekend!
by DanaHolgorsen'sPreCirrhoticLiver on Sep 2, 2011 10:13 AM EDT reply actions
FOOBAW!
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:17 AM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
I don't remember who it was
because, well, they were offering the tip to someone else and I just happened to notice it, but whichever one of you glorious bastards offered the tip about the TuneIn Radio iPhone app… I love you in a totally non-sexual way.
I got to listen to Steve Czaban in my car this morning, and all is right with the world, at least until K-State trips over their own dicks on Saturday and loses to Eastern Kentucky.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
Basically, it turns your phone into a streaming device
which picks up any radio station that offers an internet stream feed. (Obviously, stuff that gets blacked out, like a local radio’s carriage of an MLB game, is also blacked out on your phone.) There’s versions for pretty much every smartphone OS, and they’ve got a straight web interface you can use on your desktop too, looks like.
And I haven’t tried it yet to see how it works, but it looks like you can set your phone to record a program and then listen to it in podcast fashion.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
(Which is handy if you want to listen to a daily show but don't care when
and you’d rather download it over wi-fi than burn data plan minutes!!)
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
I don't believe I offered the original tip
but i swear by that shit.
"It's not all about the game. It's about who you share it with." - Les Miles
by Matt 'n' The Hat on Sep 2, 2011 11:13 AM EDT up reply actions
Relf to Bumphis?
Relf to Bumphis!
8/17/11 Nick Bloomfield on Finebaum. I WAS THERE.
by Sasquatch Love on Sep 2, 2011 10:13 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
I hope they throw to him more next week
He’s crucial to my fantasy team.
by ElRocco337 on Sep 2, 2011 10:15 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
we'll have to next week
we played a lot of 2d & 3d team last night.. also, expect to see him take a few snaps.
8/17/11 Nick Bloomfield on Finebaum. I WAS THERE.
by Sasquatch Love on Sep 2, 2011 10:17 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Ralph to Bumpits!
Chairwoman of the "Blood Is Thicker Than Tuition Money" Committee for Fan Bigamy
by allicolls on Sep 2, 2011 10:17 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
WE ARE GOING OUT FOR DINNER!
i was looking all over for that!
For Whom The Cowbell Tolls
twitter.com/mstatesports
by The Bruce Dickinson on Sep 2, 2011 10:31 AM EDT up reply actions
I see the B1G has a new rivalry trophy.
Do. Not. Eff. This. Up.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Sep 2, 2011 10:34 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Hah, no, not the B1G.
Far too much ankle showing.
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 10:35 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
The craigs james memorial hooker leg award?
Who wins this again
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 10:35 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
The loser of the Purdue intrasquad spring game
1950 NCAA Co-National Champions
by Old South on Sep 2, 2011 10:36 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Why is this only at 2 recs right now?
I thought I knew you, EDSBS commentariat.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
I hate A Christmas Story
/puts on the flame suit
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:40 AM EDT up reply actions
I'm not sure I've ever seen it straight through
But I am sure I’ve seen ever second of it at least four times. (Damn you TBS)
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 10:42 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
YOU PEOPLE GET THE LIFEBUOY FOR YOUR BLASPHEMY
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
by Go Big Rev on Sep 2, 2011 10:43 AM EDT up reply actions 9 recs
It was a cool movie when it first came out.
When they started showing it on an endless loop every Christmas, it became uncool real quicklike.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:44 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Agreed
I can still take it in small doses
l prefer Bad(der) Santa anyday
Shut Up! I must have my EDSBS and my bourbons!!
by Eddie Teach on Sep 2, 2011 10:57 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
the other ones in the series
are relatively undiscovered gems, Ollie Hopnoodles, how I long to go there.
Why does TBS even do that?
Only movie that could work on an endless loop at Christmas is It’s A Wonderful Life.
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
Maybe A Christmas Story is the only Christmas movie
TBS actually owns the copyright on.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 4:12 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
The movie is not worthy of an auto-rec.
Mostly because I’ve been forced to watch it against my will many times.
UGA fans
OK, let’s say Richt loses to Boise and S. Carolina and gets fired midseason and you guys finish out the year with an interim coach (probably Mike Bobo). Do you think you go after Dan Mullen and, if so, do you think he accepts?
Come on, fhqwhgads. I see you jockin' me, tryin' to play like you NO me.
by PW and EDSBSMD on Sep 2, 2011 10:14 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
That won't happen
Simply because it would require us to have Mike Bobo as an interim.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Sep 2, 2011 10:16 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I think they hire Malzahn.
The real question is who does Auburn hire for a new head coach.
by Truffle Shuffle on Sep 2, 2011 10:22 AM EDT up reply actions 9 recs
....
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 10:26 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Rumor is that they go
after Kirby Smart. That has been the rumor for the last few years.
by El Kabong!!! on Sep 2, 2011 12:03 PM EDT up reply actions
Kirby would most likely take it.
Then Saban would have 3 of his disciples in the SEC.
by Durdens Wrath on Sep 2, 2011 2:19 PM EDT up reply actions
So...
I hope no one bet on Wisconsin to cover last night.
Gambling on the line in games between a top 15 team and a bottom feeder of a non BCS conference in the first week of the season is how you wind up living in cardboard.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:20 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
While I didn't bet last night's games, I am fully intent on betting this TCU - Baylor game tonight.
Everything tells me to bet TCU, but Baylor has a former hurdling champion as QB….
What?
The all time hurdling champion plays for Rice.
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 10:30 AM EDT up reply actions
How does USC/Minn fit into this rule?
not quite Top 15 but… Minnesota?
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 10:43 AM EDT up reply actions
Jerry Kill has already put the players through far worse than a USC beatdown.
At one point over the summer, he punished guys who were lazy in practice by sending them to the Minneapolis PD’s mounted division stables to shovel shit.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:46 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
FIGHT WIN SHOVEL?
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
I will run through a wall for Coach Kill
I will run through a wall, rebuild it higher and defend it to the death for Glenn Caruso
/obscure reference is obscure
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 10:54 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
And then push the higher wall over onto Tim Brewster?
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
Do you have any clue how good Minnesota's going to be?
Do you have any clue how good USC’s going to be? Seriously, any result from a 3 point Minnesota win to a 44 point USC blowout would not surprise me. This is not a game upon which I’m willing to gamble. Week 2, I start feeling much better about handing my bookie some money. Week 1 is more or less just a crapshoot.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:48 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Frigidaire or an import?
Frigidaire still makes some roomy refrigerator boxes, but Samsung is now a strong contender in the icebox market and has nice reinforcements in its cardboard boxes. The real question is whether to shop behind Best Buy or shop behind Sears.
Another question is: How does Vegas know? They always know. Aristotle said a leader should have foresight and knowledge of the ultimate particular. Nothing is more ultimately particular than predicting the scoring margin of a game that has yet to be played. Vegas for President!
Clever sign off pending.
by Slum C on Sep 2, 2011 10:57 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
raises hand sheepishly
Come on, fhqwhgads. I see you jockin' me, tryin' to play like you NO me.
by PW and EDSBSMD on Sep 2, 2011 10:24 AM EDT up reply actions
I took them to cover in a pool
UNLV backdoor’d the living shit out of that cover.
Greyshirted No More
Black Shoe Diaries
@runthedive
by Peter Gray on Sep 2, 2011 10:26 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
hiss
if you’re betting on the spread in a week one game you have a problem
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 10:27 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
It's a pick'em pool, man
I didn’t put legal tender on it. I mean, the pool’s for cash but whatever.
Greyshirted No More
Black Shoe Diaries
@runthedive
by Peter Gray on Sep 2, 2011 10:30 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I approve of your actions!
Gambling? What’s the worst that could happen?
"I'm colonel cool! And I'm the captain on this rocket to the stars!"
Why won't Craig James deny that he is Highland Park Ripper?
It’s a simple question. What does he have to hide?
I'm so completely wishing my handle
Was “The Highland Park Ripper”. It’s got style! Panache! It’s strangleriffic!
"Disco?" He shakes his head. "What a dark time for our country."
by Burrito Electrico on Sep 2, 2011 10:18 AM EDT up reply actions
craig james: sweating under the pressure
by vlad3217 on Sep 2, 2011 10:28 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
He was sad last night.
He knows EDSBS has made a joke out of his life.
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 10:29 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Erroneous! Erroneous!
Craig James has made a joke of Craig James’s life. We have simply recognized that there’s a punch line.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 10:30 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Point taken
Now he’s just in on the joke.
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 10:32 AM EDT up reply actions
Czaban was talking at length about Feldman this morning
and just ripped James a new asshole, albeit briefly. Something to the tune of “I saw him last night, and… damn, I just don’t like that guy. I was like a dog growling at a trespasser through a screen door.”
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:32 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You sure he wasn't lactating about certain ... happy memories?
/thataretotallyuntrueIwishyouwouldstopsayingthat
/RIPthefive
"You're just a man in a room with a checkbook."
by The Ghost of Brodie Croyle's Knees on Sep 2, 2011 12:48 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Kentucky FedEx
If a FedEx arrives to your football team’s offices from Lexington, immediately forward it to your rival, and then write us a thank you note for saving your season.
OTOH, if a FedEx arrives from the basketball offices, get Chris Mills to help you open the envelope and be sure to tip him generously from the cash contained therein.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 10:15 AM EDT reply actions 4 recs
The EDSBS crowd might not get the baskety hoops joke
but I did.
by jerry.bail.bonds on Sep 2, 2011 10:19 AM EDT up reply actions
Hello, Mr. Beebe?
Hi, this is R.C. Johnson from Memphis. Yes, I’m doing good! Say, I was wondering if you had received the package I FedEx’d you the other day. The one with $10,000 in unmarked bills just like you asked? No? Really? Gosh, that’s three lost packages in a row! I can’t understand what’s happening, FedEx is usually so reliable. Sure, I can send another. This is going to get us into the Big XII right? Because we could be using that money to upgrade our football stadium. Why are you laughing? Oh, I see, yes, I hear Deloss Dodds tells great knock-knock jokes. OK, sure, I’ll send that package right out! Great to hear from you Dan!
by Gaknar on Sep 2, 2011 10:33 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Hell, I saw Eric Manuel in the NAIA tournament for OCU after all that nonsense
Now I feel old.
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
Hell with that, I'll open it myself
pocket all the cash, and burn the evidence.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
FedEx will never find Fayettville! Never!
uses Cloaking Device
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
TONIGHT, THE TRUE BATTLE OF GOOD AND EVIL BEGINS!
by Truffle Shuffle on Sep 2, 2011 10:18 AM EDT reply actions 4 recs
BAHRS, PA, THAR'S BAHRS DIGGIN' IN AWR TRAAAASH
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Casey Pachall is picking up the mantle of ANDIAMBRO
Discuss.
Greyshirted No More
Black Shoe Diaries
@runthedive
by Peter Gray on Sep 2, 2011 10:20 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I still think the losing team
Should be branded heretics and burned.
"Disco?" He shakes his head. "What a dark time for our country."
by Burrito Electrico on Sep 2, 2011 11:08 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Worked late last night
Then stayed up from 11-2 watching the Miss State game. Had the thought, “Hey, they’re running Oregon’s offense. That’s okay, Auburn has experience defending that.” Then realized that the Auburn players with that experience will be in Section 100 of Jordan-Hare with Otis Mounds.
Fixed fortifications are monuments to the stupidity of man. If anything made by God can be overcome; anything made by man can be overcome -- Gus Malzahn
by Tuco on Sep 2, 2011 10:18 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Its our new play calling system
The opponent is mesmerized by the photo of Erin Andrews and we just run right past them.
For Whom The Cowbell Tolls
twitter.com/mstatesports
by The Bruce Dickinson on Sep 2, 2011 10:21 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Shameless reposting is shameless
by Ron Zook Owes Me a Liver on Sep 2, 2011 10:51 AM EDT up reply actions 12 recs
I cannot express with words how dissappointed I will be if this does nto show up
I am thinking, perhaps, signs of this with paper taped on as a different sign to get past the screening.
Get in, pull off the paper cover taped on, real sign explodes and the TRUTH COMES OUT
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 10:52 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
This has been driving me nuts ever since I first saw this image.
What’s the bagpiper for?
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:54 AM EDT up reply actions
"kilt"
killed
Oh, and the moon sometimes also looks like a C, but you can't eat that.
by Illusions, Michael. on Sep 2, 2011 10:55 AM EDT up reply actions
Huh - I always thought "bagged"
Still kinda got the idea, though.
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
Palm, meet face. Face, meet palm.
In retrospect, it was obvious, but I got hung up on the pipes, not the kilt.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:59 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Version #1 had a dagger
Which is the only proper hooker-killing device. But I decided to go phonetic… sort of. I also considered two of these instead of the “hook” + “R’s”:
by Broncanous Mendenhall on Sep 2, 2011 11:02 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Count on the Texan . . .
. . . to recognize “kilt” as a verb. Thanks.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 10:56 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Hey, I got it straight off too!
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:57 AM EDT up reply actions
Because if you call it a skirt...
…you’ll get kilt.
YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH.jpg
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Sep 2, 2011 11:19 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Its just a skirt
What's the deal with observational comedy?
by The Assman 1 on Sep 2, 2011 11:29 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
could always replace the bag piper with more than one crow
by softbatch on Sep 2, 2011 10:57 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Not many other people whould know Jerry Kills head
Kilt I think more people would get.
Obviously, here, Jerry would do quite well
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
kilt implies past tense, which is I guess why I like it so much
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
Could we get one of Mtn Eer's kilts instead, then?
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
by Go Big Rev on Sep 2, 2011 11:13 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
In all honestly
Anyone who manages to get these on the air will be granted instantaneous sainthood, regardless of the actual images used
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
if the proverbial schedule holds up I might try it
/plans are being made….
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 11:15 AM EDT up reply actions
Maybe not in game, as I'll not be in the stands.
but should the Gameday crew visit UW for the “Welcome to the B1G” facestomping that Bucky’s going to administer to Nebraska, there’s a decent chance I’ll get on camera with it.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 3:16 PM EDT up reply actions
For you, Big Rev, sure....
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I'M IN THE WRONG DENOMINATION
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Sep 2, 2011 11:20 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Is it possible to airbrush a person straight out of existence?
Maybe that’s what happened to Purdue….
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 11:21 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
You've got to have a whole folder of these or something
"They wouldn't be heroes if they were infallible, in fact they wouldn't be heroes if they weren't miserable wretched dogs, the pariahs of the earth, besides which the only reason to build up an idol is to tear it down again."
Nah, I just GIS them up on the spur of the moment...
The interwebz is just loaded to the gills with this type of soft porn.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 11:24 AM EDT up reply actions
GIS them up
I’ll never be used to the acronym for “Google image search,” so I replace that with an image of you accurately positioning each picture in its geographical origin in your geospatially-searchable porn database.
Just for you Tanner, I Googled this one...
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 1:44 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I was saving Ms Flutie for the weekend
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
Craig James piped five hookers at SMU?
The bastard beat them to death with a pipe!
by Anonymous IV at Mono Lake on Sep 2, 2011 1:52 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
We should add
a sign for the coach on the right with the words “A” “picture of edge of building” “picture of Cliff Lee”
Mario is hotter in that picture
#TeamFireFlower
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
many thanks to yall for the moral support last night
what with the girls of relationships past and all.
TOMORROW: FOOBAW!
Oh, and the moon sometimes also looks like a C, but you can't eat that.
by Illusions, Michael. on Sep 2, 2011 10:21 AM EDT reply actions
I take it you turned off the phone at some point?
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:23 AM EDT up reply actions
immediately after that call
woke up to 4 texts from her filled with ranting
Oh, and the moon sometimes also looks like a C, but you can't eat that.
by Illusions, Michael. on Sep 2, 2011 10:27 AM EDT up reply actions
yeesh.
Best of luck the rest of the weekend, sounds like you may need it.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:31 AM EDT up reply actions
Response:
“Bitch, I don’t owe you anything, go away.”
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:33 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I can haz football on TV?!
LOL NO SIR F U we here at BGE cannot fix your power until never o’clock threeve days after the hurristorm.
ESS EEE CEE SPEEEEEEED
"Shut up legs, and do what I tell you." - JENS
Moved up from last night's final open thread
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:25 AM EDT reply actions 8 recs
FUCK NEW ENGLAND
Greyshirted No More
Black Shoe Diaries
@runthedive
by Peter Gray on Sep 2, 2011 10:26 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
AND OLD ENGLAND AMIRITE?!?!?!1one
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 10:26 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I JUST DID
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 10:27 AM EDT up reply actions 16 recs
Hey Truffle
What color is Connecticut? I can’t tell…
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:26 AM EDT up reply actions
It appears to be red Nick.
I don’t blame them. It’s hard to get excited when Uconn plays the most boring form of football imaginable and still wins the conference despite it being abundantly clear that they suck.
by Truffle Shuffle on Sep 2, 2011 10:36 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
They'd better suck in a week, is all I can say...
/curls up in corner
/waits for the floor to cave in again
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
FACK YOU FACK YOU FACK YOU
IT’S TIME FOR THE GREATRIOTS TO CONTINUE OW-AH DYNASTY AND BECOME THE NEW CITY OF CHAMPIONS AND RED SAWX NATION TO STAND UP AND
/gunshot
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 10:27 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Someone needs to do something about those faaaackin' heretics from Rhode Island.
Insufficient attention to the Sawx.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 10:27 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Fucking Canadians.
Or whatever. Close enough.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
Canadians would have the good sense to at least be a 4
Also, I’m basing my entire perception of Canadian CFB awareness on Andrew Bucholtz tweeting about it last night.
Greyshirted No More
Black Shoe Diaries
@runthedive
Well, New Hampshire and Maine barely have high school football
so I’m not surprised.
by Truffle Shuffle on Sep 2, 2011 10:29 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I think the most surprising is all the excitement in Vermont.
Is everyone all excited for Middlebury’s NESCAC prospects?
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:30 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
It's all about Norwich, man.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:33 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Texas A&M to join Norwich in an all-cadets conference
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:34 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Deal is contingent on North Georgia starting a football program.
No decision yet on whether A&M will stop offering scholarships, or whether North Georgia, Norwich, Merchant Marine, and Coast Guard will move up to FBS. Army, Navy, and Air Force calling the shots.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:36 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Word is Virginia Tech may join if the SEC takes Florida State.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:37 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
(The fucking crazy thing is that this really would be a cool conference if they were all at the same level.)
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:39 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
No doubt.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:42 AM EDT up reply actions
Do I have to make my feelings about Middlebury clear, again?
Fuck them. Fuck them with a rusty pitchfork covered in cow shit. Hopefully Irene wiped that blighted campus off the map last weekend.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 10:48 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
pistols at dawn, sirrah
my grandmother attended middlebury and i will not hear her name besmirched
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 10:49 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Well, that sure escalated quickly.
That Hokie freshman in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters didn't see any of this coming.
Yeah...I mean it really got out of hand didnt it?
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 10:53 AM EDT up reply actions
About that Jon.
You might want to lay low for a while. I hear West Lafayette is nice.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 10:55 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I what?
Unlike Craig James, I will deny this allegation.
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I have, but only once.
I reallyreallyreallyreally dislike Will Ferrell.
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Tell us why you really hate them, T-Jax.
Did they beat you at Quidditch?
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No
It can’t be. You know why? Cause Quidditch is fucking fictional.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 11:06 AM EDT up reply actions 4 recs
The internet used to be fictional, too.
So did microwave ovens and spacecraft.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:07 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Let me get this straight...
You’re saying that this lacrosse knockoff, with its self-aware balls and flying brooms, is only a matter of TIME?
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 11:09 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
It's already happened.
Out of the goodness of my heart, and in the interest of saving your sanity, I will not provide a link to the web site for the official collegiate Quidditch league page.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:10 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
/checks the Googles
Holy God. Let’s just end America now.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 11:11 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Agreed. It's over Johnny.
/turns out lights as I leave.
by Durdens Wrath on Sep 2, 2011 2:25 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
JUST KIDDING!
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
I'VE SEEN THESE POOR SAD BASTARDS
They practice on the Oval, which is like our quad. It’s hilarious and depressing at the same time. Hilaripressing.
When visiting my son's school
I witnessed a group of students playing a game on one of the parking lots some distance away. I was curious, as it looked for all the world like stickball.
Turns out it was some south Asian kids playing cricket, which I thought was exceptionally cool.
There's a lot of Pakistani kids here
who play cricket on the west campus fields. The game is absolutely inscrutable.
Cricket actually makes sense
if you take time to figure out the rules.
I can’t speak to actually enjoying it as a spectator sport, though. I love baseball, but cricket combines all its worst aspects as a spectator sport with those of golf.
That Hokie freshman in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters didn't see any of this coming.
I work with a lot of Indians.
They refuse to try to explain cricket to Americans because it’s nearly impossible. I’m convinced that even they don’t understand it completely.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
"Fuck it, the British made it up, go ask them."
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:23 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
See, I had a Pakistani guy explain it to me
while the people who were running my trip spent 40 fucking minutes trying to check my group in to our hotel in Manchester as India and England were playing on the TV. He hated both sides, which was good for the explanation, because when either side screwed up he laughed at them.
That Hokie freshman in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters didn't see any of this coming.
!!!!!
“40 fucking minutes trying to check my group in”
This is why I hated college-sanctioned trips overseas.
Oh, it was even better than that
The coordinators sent out an email a couple weeks before claiming we were flying IAD-Gatwick, which I was pretty sure Virgin Atlantic doesn’t do. So I called Virgin to verify that before making an ass of myself. Gave them my legal name, and they couldn’t find my reservation. Turned out the coordinators hadn’t bothered to read any of my paperwork when reserving the flights and had just assumed my legal name was Joshua, which it isn’t at all.
Thankfully, this was May 2001, so they just made a note in the e-ticket and everyone played it cool. Four months later and I wouldn’t have been able to get on the plane.
That Hokie freshman in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters didn't see any of this coming.
Most of us don't understand it either
Hit the ball with this goofy 2×4 as far as you can, or hit it into the gap. Just don’t let it hit the sticks stacked up behind you.
And we were singing, hymns and arias...
title
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 11:24 AM EDT up reply actions 12 recs
Autorec
C&H ranks with Guernica and Clair de Lune as a piece of art, and no I’m not joking.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
The basics really aren't that complex.
I figured the game out by watching it for an hour, it’s really just not that difficult.
There’s weird stuff that takes longer to grok, but… well, let me just throw out the terms “offsetting penalties”, “illegal motion”, “infield fly rule”, “balk”, and “icing” before dropping my mic.
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My sense of it . . .
. . . is that if I’d grown up with cricket rather than baseball, it would make sense to me and I’d probably love it. As it stands, I try to follow along and feel like an Englishman must feel trying to figure out baseball.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
I think if it weren't for the scoring complexities
nobody would be confused. You look at a cricket final score without understanding the game and your immediate reaction is “what the fuck does that mean?”
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Oh I'm not saying that baseball isn't just as complex in its way.
I don’t try to explain baseball to people from overseas, either.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
I took a visiting Brit to his first game several years ago
and taught him the game by having him score it (alongside me). Teaching baseball by total immersion actually worked really well.
That Hokie freshman in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters didn't see any of this coming.
by JoshCVT on Sep 2, 2011 11:44 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Cool Story time
We had an 8 year old English kid on our little league team back in the day. He asked my dad (the coach), “when I hit the ball, do I run inside or outside the line?” My dad: “Actually, you run down the line to the base.” Neither my dad nor myself realized which side of the line mattered in cricket.
by ElRocco337 on Sep 2, 2011 11:45 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Maybe I'm just really good at deciphering inscrutable sporting contests.
I figured out Aussie Rules and Rugby all on my own on my first exposure, too.
Damned if I didn’t have to watch threeve hours of roller derby to figure it out, though.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:45 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Im right there with you
including roller derby.
Collegiate tennis isnt obvious either.
There are 3 doubles matches and 6 singles matches but only 7 pts?
the secret ingredient is ... love?!
by gtne91 on Sep 2, 2011 11:50 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I'm sure if I sat down and watched a full cricket match I could get close enough.
I managed to more or less figure out field hockey on my own over a couple of matches.
Oh and roller derby scoring is really easy to figure out. But if you go to roller derby it’s more of a social and entertainment event than a sporting event.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
My problem with roller derby
was that I was assigning it TOO much complexity. I figured there had to be rules other than “pass people”, but I was wrong.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 12:08 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I'd be a Stranger In A Strange Land if I was playing cricket.
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
Without the self aware balls and flying brooms, yeah, it's happened already.
Of course, that’s kinda missing the point if you take away the flying brooms and self-aware balls, but eh, kids these days. Amirite?
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:12 AM EDT up reply actions
Actually, the Golden Snitch is self aware in the versions of which I know:
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
by Go Big Rev on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You're. Fucking. Kidding.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 11:16 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
how else would you do it?
Grease a pig and paint it gold?
by softbatch on Sep 2, 2011 11:17 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I would watch this
/sortofwant.jpg
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
A Japanese hornet
We’ll see who really wants to win this game.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 11:19 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
KILL IT WITH FIRE
/no really, kill it with fire, it’s kind of fun to watch angry fireballs fly around from a distance of several miles
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:20 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
/Will Stein transfers to GaTech
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 11:42 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Nah, CHICKEN. Or maybe a really ornery cat.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
I'd watch AND play if it was a greased pig.
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
Holy...I...Wow.
I am completely stunned, and would probably welcome the advent of Ghoser the Ghosarian in the next few minutes before I assimilate this. We are sick, and need to be destroyed.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:20 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
My god. It's like watching the Holy Grail.
Only without people clopping together two cocoanuts.
by Durdens Wrath on Sep 2, 2011 2:30 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
"So let me get this straight,"
Harry said as it seemed that Ron’s explanation (with associated hand gestures) was winding down. “Catching the Snitch is worth one hundred and fifty points?”
“Yeah -”
“How many ten-point goals does one side usually score not counting the Snitch?”
“Um, maybe fifteen or twenty in professional games -”
“That’s just wrong. That violates every possible rule of game design. Look, the rest of this game sounds like it might make sense, sort of, for a sport I mean, but you’re basically saying that catching the Snitch overwhelms almost any ordinary point spread. The two Seekers are up there flying around looking for the Snitch and usually not interacting with anyone else, spotting the Snitch first is going to be mostly luck -”
“It’s not luck!” protested Ron. “You’ve got to keep your eyes moving in the right pattern -”
“That’s not interactive, there’s no back-and-forth with the other player and how much fun is it to watch someone incredibly good at moving their eyes? And then whichever Seeker gets lucky swoops in and grabs the Snitch and makes everyone else’s work moot. It’s like someone took a real game and grafted on this pointless extra position just so that you could be the Most Important Player without needing to really get involved or learn the rest of it. Who was the first Seeker, the King’s idiot son who wanted to play Quidditch but couldn’t understand the rules?” Actually, now that Harry thought about it, that seemed like a surprisingly good hypothesis. Put him on a broomstick and tell him to catch the shiny thing…
Ron’s face pulled into a scowl. “If you don’t like Quidditch, you don’t have to make fun of it!”
“If you can’t criticize, you can’t optimize. I’m suggesting how to improve the game. And it’s very simple. Get rid of the Snitch.”
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5782108/7/Harry_Potter_and_the_Methods_of_Rationality
Corporal mortification is now in order for having posted that…
by Tanner B on Sep 2, 2011 1:58 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Seriously, that's like if a safety was worth 32 points or some shit.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
/reads "A Logic Named Joe"
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 11:12 AM EDT up reply actions
Love me some Murray Leinster, I mean Will Jenkins
You could hire a baboon, and you should win eight games.
-- Former WVU Heach Coach Don Nehlen on playing in the current Big East
by An 'eer with a beer on Sep 2, 2011 12:04 PM EDT up reply actions
relatedly
FUCK BOSTON
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:58 AM EDT up reply actions
Oh, shh.
You won the hoopetybucket title last year, you greedy bastich.
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Seriously?
I’m sure it got written up, but I remember like zero coverage in the Strib.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 11:00 AM EDT up reply actions
Imagine that.
The Strib is too busy trying to get past my spam filters to cover anything properly.
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YESSIR
Only one school in all of college sports managed 12 football wins and 30 men’s basketball wins last year.
There was another one down in Columbus, OH, but we all know how that ended.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:02 AM EDT up reply actions
Also
The Strib has a tendency to not notice the threeve DIII schools in the state. Can’t say I really blame them, aside from Tommie-Johnnie football, very few people really care.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:07 AM EDT up reply actions
Well, I for one, am OUTRAGED . . .
. . . over the lack of Carleton coverage.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
The Knights?
They get points for using a team name that doesn’t sound like a hockey nickname.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:12 AM EDT up reply actions
UM YA YA!
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
Howdy Oles.
Only fight song I’ve ever heard that works as a waltz.
And the worst hockey rink in the world. I’d have rather had the games outdoors.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:25 AM EDT up reply actions
Honestly, when I lived in Minneapolis, I could cope well with the relative dearth of Augsburg coverage.
It was the surfeit of Viking news that drove me nuts.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions
My roommate gets up in arms about the lack of Cobber coverage.
Not like he gives a shit about football, just that he feels Concordia is getting the shaft.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 11:15 AM EDT up reply actions
Colleges that kick off the school year . . .
. . . with a community “corn feed” deserve more coverage, not less.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
Tell him to subscribe to the Fargo paper.
It’s not like C-M is a Twin Cities area school.
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Indeed
Only conference road trips that required overnight stays. Also, only hockey team that didn’t do same weekend home/home series.
And, for the record. I’m loving the random MIAC knowledge here.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:26 AM EDT up reply actions
We cover a lot of bases around here
Heck, I even managed to be mailed a copy of Concordia’s annual report last year.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
Just don't get Chuck and I started on the OAC
or MikeLew and I started on the NCAC
or Rocco and I started on the CAA
or etc. etc.
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I'm just going to throw this out there, and it will be repeated in a little under a month.
I’ll be hitting up Tommie-Johnnie in St. Paul on 10/1 then going to Tom Reid’s on West 7th to watch the Nebraska-Sconnie game that night.
All in the area are welcome to join in.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:31 AM EDT up reply actions
Did someone say OAC?
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 11:31 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
BEAT UNION
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IIRC, the last time Muskingum beat Mount Union
was in like 1986.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 12:11 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
just as long a no one said o.a.r.
trite fratboy rock is trite and fratty.
"I am a sinner that does not expect forgiveness. But I am not a government official."
by whiskey_soup on Sep 2, 2011 12:05 PM EDT up reply actions
Oh, shit.
You may regret this later.
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I am a former fratboy
and O.A.R. is the second worst concert I have ever seen.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions
Concur on OAR
though “hip hop show with 12 guys on stage and nobody mixing the vocals” makes a strong showing.
Mr. Simpson, this procedure could drastically increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you.
Hmmm... Increase my killing power, eh? Let's do it!
by car.full.of.midgets on Sep 2, 2011 12:17 PM EDT up reply actions
I saw OAR at a bar in Oxford, OH
they played for 30 minutes, took a 45-minute set break, came back so high they couldn’t play their instruments, did an accordingly awful rendition of “Crazy Game of Poker,” and that was it.
Worst show ever was MGMT. I saw them back in 2007, when they had just put out their first EP. They were the first opener for a concert I was at in Charlottesville. They came out on stage, and one of the guys was holding up their EP (CD version, not on vinyl) like a priest does the large host during the Eucharistic Prayer. He put the CD in a CD player, hit play, and they proceeded to very obviously (and I suppose “ironically”) lip-sync for 30 minutes. It was excruciating, and I felt like demanding part of my money back.
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 12:21 PM EDT up reply actions
That's really disheartening re: MGMT
I actually like their music, but haven’t seen them live. Probably won’t now…
Mr. Simpson, this procedure could drastically increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you.
Hmmm... Increase my killing power, eh? Let's do it!
by car.full.of.midgets on Sep 2, 2011 12:55 PM EDT up reply actions
Oddly enough, that MGMT story doesn't surprise me in the slightest.
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I hear Erik T LOVES fraternities.
You should ask him about it.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 12:27 PM EDT up reply actions
Yeah, but I was on the bench for the event I linked.
Whereas I never worked with basketball.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:00 AM EDT up reply actions
Ah, I see.
I was actually unaware that Middlebury had sports. I now understand and accept your hatred.
I'm sure your grandmother is a lovely woman who simply makes horrible life decisions.
Such as attending that cesspool.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:35 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Well, they play football in a snooty-ass football league
that thinks they’re so special that they refuse to let their champion play in the D-III playoffs.
(Their moral indignation magically disappears when it comes to basketball. Amherst and Williams are perennial Final Four teams.)
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:35 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Hey! Snooty-ass no-playoff leagues . . .
. . . are as much of a college football tradition in New England as slow corn-fed linemen in the Midwest or boosters with bags of unmarked bills in the Deep South.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 11:39 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Heh, I forgot that NESCAC didn't do football playoffs.
They really are the Ivy League rejects, aren’t they?
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:40 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I suppose . . .
. . . but I’d much rather send my kid to Williams or Amherst than Harvard for undergrad.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 11:41 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Don't get emc riled up, now.
He’s got enough angst over Oregon and Northwestern, you don’t want him feeling bad about Wesleyan too.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:41 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Wow
T-Jax came out swingin’
Handbags at dawn, sirrah.
by ChocolateCity on Sep 2, 2011 11:32 AM EDT up reply actions
What's your malfunction New England?
Son, that’s Pitt. You hate Pitt now. You hate Pitt tomorrow. You hate Pitt until the day you die. After that, you will hate Pitt for eternity.’ — Jack Fleming’s Mom
I'm confused, Massachusetts is pink? Aren't Boston College fans excited about the season?
Gif of ACC Championship game in 3 .. 2 .. 1..
Fixed fortifications are monuments to the stupidity of man. If anything made by God can be overcome; anything made by man can be overcome -- Gus Malzahn
Oh, they're probably all on the road to Evanston already.
They carpool to road games.
Do. Not. Eff. This. Up.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Sep 2, 2011 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
that's actually all the girls in Chestnut Hill wearing pink BC jerseys
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Boston College fans are Notre Dame fans
We went over this
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Then they should be excited about this year!
/puts ball on tee for whomever
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 10:42 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
As I said last night
I demand the immediate expulsion of UConn and BC from Division I-A football.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:42 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Boston College lost a bowl game to VANDERBILT
where the Vandy MVP was the PUNTER.
How that doesn’t sap your will to live, I have no idea.
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Sep 2, 2011 11:23 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I'm still not convinced Matt Ryan went to BC.
I feel like he went to, like, Delaware, and nobody noticed.
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:25 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Oh he went there alright...and fucked Clemson every chance he got.
Even after David Dunham nearly killed him, the sumbitch came back in, blood leaking from every orifice in his body, and fucked us.
Fuck Clemson
Eat Shit and Die Sakerlina
by Dabolicious on Sep 2, 2011 4:22 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Sell to Canada for a low low price?
Sell to Canada for a low low price.
Do. Not. Eff. This. Up.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Sep 2, 2011 10:32 AM EDT up reply actions
/Great Concavity'd
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:33 AM EDT up reply actions
I already tried.
Every time I call and ask, they just laugh and hang up the phone.
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 10:34 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Random fact acquired this week:
Article X of the Articles of Confederation explained the process for admitting new states.
Article XI pre-approved Canada.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 10:50 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
/Continental Conference claims they have not extended an offer to Canada, or any other colony, at this time and are happy with the current 13-team arrangement
//Canada announces intent to leave Empire Conference if another Conference accepts their application
///crickets
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:54 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Crickets?
National realignment should be based on football only, not your crazy hippie Title IX sports.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 10:56 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
/scores THREEVE runs on the first wicket
//or something like that
"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!" -- Captain Murphy
Hustle Belt -- for all your MACtion needs.
by thechuck_2112 on Sep 2, 2011 10:57 AM EDT up reply actions
Wicket?
Yo, don't say nuthin'. I guess I'm just a freak.
by DrBundy on Sep 2, 2011 11:35 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Krikkit?
"I’ll tell you one thing: The grass at Tiger Stadium tastes best."
by LesMilesEatsGrass on Sep 2, 2011 11:38 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Yub Yub!
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Prince Phillip
by Go Big Rev on Sep 2, 2011 3:22 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Empire Conference renews talks with Hong Kong . . .
. . . seeking to expand into lucrative new (old?) television markets.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 10:58 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
After rejecting Canada
Continental Conference extends invitations to Kentucky, Vermont, Tennessee, Ohio, etc. etc.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:02 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Panama wishes to enter for aquatics
Remain independent for all other purposes.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 11:03 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Can we trade them for Montreal?
All the french-canadian girls? ALL THE FRENCH-CANADIAN GIRLS.
Don’t give me lip if you haven’t been to Montreal in the summer.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
which day was it this year?
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 11:26 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
This is emphatically true.
Mmmmmm. Montreal.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:28 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Best strip clubs ever.
Touch anywhere but the holy of holies.
by Durdens Wrath on Sep 2, 2011 2:34 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Rhode Island gets it....
Do they even have a Division 1 team?
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:36 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
D-1AA
Who is going to get shit stomped by Syracuse next week
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:36 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Thanks... Couldn't remember if the URI Rams were FCS or D2
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:37 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
FCS, yes.
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Brown is D-1AA (Ivy League)
Passing? Who needs passing?
by RamblinWreck007 on Sep 2, 2011 11:41 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions 1 recs
A guy I work with just asked me what my plans are for the weekend.
He went to Boston College. When they were good.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
Not this week. Airfare's too much for a cupcake game.
State College next week though.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
Me too. It'll be an epic game..... for us.
Upper deck sadly.
You’re going to be in Crimson I hope
/heard that some dumbasses were wearing white
//those dumbasses do not root for Penn State
by Durdens Wrath on Sep 2, 2011 3:09 PM EDT up reply actions
Wearing white to the stadium
Buying scalped ticket. Changing into hidden crimson jersey.
Profit.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
You might find a cheaper ticket on StubHub
S’where I got mine.
by Durdens Wrath on Sep 2, 2011 3:24 PM EDT up reply actions
That is pathetic
But so is their college footbaw
by NeedzMoarLolz on Sep 2, 2011 11:00 AM EDT up reply actions
Vermont's cool
Main and New Hampshire are probably too busy lobster fishing.
Massachusettes is clearly the devil though.
by Charles UF on Sep 2, 2011 11:44 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Lobster Fishing, Red Sox, Lumberjacking, worshiping Stephen King
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
since this was towards the end of the last fanpost of last night.
humor of the morning:
KU Daily Kansan article which includes the idea of KU to the SEC over Mizzou.
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 10:31 AM EDT reply actions
TROLOLOL. LOL.
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As someone who believes Mizzou has no shot at the SEC
What do you have to say about this Coach Saban?
by Gaknar on Sep 2, 2011 10:36 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Sounds like he could use an Ugg boot then
by creasy bear on Sep 2, 2011 10:39 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Well, his shoes aren't very big, so it shouldn't be too hard
"I think so, Brain, but how are we going to get the bacon flavoring into the pencils?" -Pinky
"Cleveland is a giant petri dish of masochistic enabling." -Londonjoe
"Some mathematician has said that pleasure lies not in discovering truth, but in seeking it." -Tolstoy
by MikeLew on Sep 2, 2011 10:39 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
A terrible typo
That may make that funnier
by Nick Petrilli on Sep 2, 2011 10:42 AM EDT up reply actions
the man does wear some damn nice shoes
I'm not going to a country that confuses itself with poultry. Never.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Sep 2, 2011 11:08 AM EDT up reply actions
He's getting ready to say
You know Mean Gene!
Fixed fortifications are monuments to the stupidity of man. If anything made by God can be overcome; anything made by man can be overcome -- Gus Malzahn
by Tuco on Sep 2, 2011 10:42 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
GODDAMMIT!!!!
8/17/11 Nick Bloomfield on Finebaum. I WAS THERE.
by Sasquatch Love on Sep 2, 2011 10:53 AM EDT up reply actions
Da-yum. I never realized how short Tracy Wolfson was until just now.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:38 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
sit'n'spin?
"I think so, Brain, but how are we going to get the bacon flavoring into the pencils?" -Pinky
"Cleveland is a giant petri dish of masochistic enabling." -Londonjoe
"Some mathematician has said that pleasure lies not in discovering truth, but in seeking it." -Tolstoy
by MikeLew on Sep 2, 2011 10:40 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
She's spinning! She's spinnin'!
/Chris Rock’d
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Just means you can get acrobatic with her.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 10:39 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I have dated some rather tiny women in my life....
and yes, they are quite manuerverable.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:51 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Dated a 5'1 dancer in high school and freshman year of college.
Yowza.
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 10:54 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
this x a lot
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
by Irishjugg on Sep 2, 2011 10:56 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You already said she was a dancer.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 10:58 AM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
rec'd for truthiness
"I am a sinner that does not expect forgiveness. But I am not a government official."
by whiskey_soup on Sep 2, 2011 12:07 PM EDT up reply actions
You told us that already-
dancer + female, you see
"I think so, Brain, but how are we going to get the bacon flavoring into the pencils?" -Pinky
"Cleveland is a giant petri dish of masochistic enabling." -Londonjoe
"Some mathematician has said that pleasure lies not in discovering truth, but in seeking it." -Tolstoy
by MikeLew on Sep 2, 2011 10:58 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I mean, it wasn't on that Black Swan shit
but she wanted to get married at age 19 and became…erratic when I expresssed doubts. NOTHX
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:00 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Perhaps they are related or soul sisters
she got married pretty much right after we broke up to some older guy
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:01 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I'm thinking I might have dated this girl as well.
/Gort-Damned Media Conspirasah.jpg
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:03 AM EDT up reply actions
I've always preferred
“Cave Buddies”
no homo
by haybeav on Sep 2, 2011 11:09 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
"maybe we are eskimo brothers..."
“have you ever had sex with…uh…your sister?”
"I just wanted a normal, christian lapdance!" - Bartender in NYC after describing a donkey show he was taken to in New Orleans
by otowndawg on Sep 2, 2011 12:56 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
My sister did ballet/tap and I'd like to object to this
However, I can’t. Between her and her friends I know this to be true.
by ElRocco337 on Sep 2, 2011 11:01 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Younger or older sister?
Because if younger by about 2 years or so, you pretty much had the ultimate in target rich environments as a 17 year old.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:09 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Younger by 5 years
So pretty much out of my range growing up. Sister quit when she was 16.
by ElRocco337 on Sep 2, 2011 11:10 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Well that's just sad.
I know I felt gypped over the fact that my only sister was 9 years younger than me and that therefore, although her friends may have crushed on me a bit while growing up, I had no desire to take advantage of the situation. Contrasted with a very good friend of mine who had a sister just younger than him and essentially took the virginity of about 60% of her high school class, i believe.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:17 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
My younger brother (2 yrs)
had a lot of female friends whom he chose not to date. I took full advantage of the situation when I was single in high school.
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:19 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You have to take what the defense gives you.
by ElRocco337 on Sep 2, 2011 11:19 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
He gave generously.
My brother prefers not to date women.
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:20 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Gentlemen of that persuasion make EXCELLENT wingmen.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 11:28 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
So, what you're saying is that Broski was a system deflowerer?
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:24 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
My career was far too short for the hall of fame anyway.
/stupidstupidstupid
//WHY DID I GET MYSELF INTO A RELATIONSHIP IN HIGH SCHOOL AND THE FIRST TWO YEARS OF COLLEGE
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:26 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
This is a good question.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:29 AM EDT up reply actions
For some reason*, I didn't learn this myself
until the third time through.
*some reason can be taken to mean the sex was awesome.
Mr. Simpson, this procedure could drastically increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you.
Hmmm... Increase my killing power, eh? Let's do it!
by car.full.of.midgets on Sep 2, 2011 11:02 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I dated nothing but ballerinas in college
And those relationships ended nothing but badly.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
Ballerinas are pretty stable.
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 11:08 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
How did we get from "Kansas to the SEC" to "Ballerinas are crazy in the sack"?
Oh, who cares. Someone post a Mila Kunis pic.
Tracy Wolfson being short
and me suggesting that would not bother me in the least?
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:11 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
#TeamMila #FuckY'all
Greyshirted No More
Black Shoe Diaries
@runthedive
by Peter Gray on Sep 2, 2011 11:24 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
#teamBoth
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:25 AM EDT up reply actions
Not saying I'm not #teammila...
But if Natalie Portman said she would marry me if I murdered a hobo, I’d have a serious moral dilemma on my hands. She’s so talented, so smart, and so funny on top of the already incredible hotness…
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 11:34 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
/foot applied to ass
//thud on floor
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In a heartbeat.
Not saying it wouldn’t be super difficult but I could make that switch.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
Not sure whether to rec or flag
the secret ingredient is ... love?!
One of two for me
but not sure whether to be proud of that or not.
the secret ingredient is ... love?!
It's funny, you gotta give it that.
And I’m a noted sitcom non-watcher. I only watch HIMYM when forced to in order to be social.
If Mila proposed this to me
It wouldn’t be a dilemma.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:45 AM EDT up reply actions
It starts with one dead hobo
Next thing you know, you’re driving around the desert at night with five dismembered hookers in the trunk of your car.
by Gaknar on Sep 2, 2011 11:54 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
If Natalie Portman said she'd give me a sammich
I’d murder a hobo and have no moral dilemmers at all.
by El Kabong!!! on Sep 2, 2011 12:31 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Yes. Would.
Inanity @gothlaw
"Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is." -Sir Francis Bacon
by Stuck in the Plains on Sep 2, 2011 5:39 PM EDT up reply actions
rhetorical question is rhetorical
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions
Horsechicks.
Never fuck with a horsechick.
I'm not going to a country that confuses itself with poultry. Never.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Sep 2, 2011 11:11 AM EDT up reply actions
Married to one for 30 years
You just have to learn to accept that you’re always #2. Unless she has more than one horse.
You could hire a baboon, and you should win eight games.
-- Former WVU Heach Coach Don Nehlen on playing in the current Big East
by An 'eer with a beer on Sep 2, 2011 12:08 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
See, horsechicks aren't that bad.
Until you give a drunk one a piggy back and you end up with bruised ribs. EASE UP WOMAN I AM NOT ONE OF YOUR STEEDS
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 12:28 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
The one that caused me to swear off of dancers as a whole
was mostly contemporary/jazz. Was slightly unstable at first, then she got to be good friends with a certain cracky tiger from South Carolina. The last time she ever set foot in my apartment, she stole a check from my checkbook.
Mr. Simpson, this procedure could drastically increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you.
Hmmm... Increase my killing power, eh? Let's do it!
by car.full.of.midgets on Sep 2, 2011 11:09 AM EDT up reply actions
I had one of those!
She was also bipolar with an eating disorder. 2002 was a fun, fun year.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
as a happily-engaged 30 year old dude looking back on my dating life
I can safely say somebody did a number on something like 95% of the women in my generation. My dad’s stories from the doing the single thing in the ’70’s are like fairy tales in comparison.
Mr. Simpson, this procedure could drastically increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you.
Hmmm... Increase my killing power, eh? Let's do it!
by car.full.of.midgets on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
My generation was simply weird.
All the fun of the 70s packaged with all the crazy of the 90s.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:20 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I think the retro combo that best explains my experiences
would be the fun of the 70’s, the crazy of the 90’s, and the morals of 80’s Wall Street.
Mr. Simpson, this procedure could drastically increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you.
Hmmm... Increase my killing power, eh? Let's do it!
by car.full.of.midgets on Sep 2, 2011 11:28 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Well, I figured that last part would be obvious from the context.
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Sounds exactly like a girl I dated my senior year of college.
Bipolar ex-dancer with an eating disorder who also was my neighbor. Fall 2002 was fun and the fallout in spring 2003 was spectacular.
by Dylan Farnum on Sep 2, 2011 11:22 AM EDT up reply actions
HEY I KNOW THAT CHICK
MAN SHE KNEW HOW TO PARTY ONCE WE WERE AT THIS RECITAL SLASH RAVE AND SHES POPPING EXTASY LIKE ITS ASPIRIN AND IM LIKE SLOW DOWN BABY YOU HAVE TO SMOOTH IT OUT LET ONE ROLL INTO THE OTHER AND SHES LIKE FUCK THAT I AM THE QUEEN OF THE DANCE AND THEN SHE STARTS DANCING ON THE TABLES AND IM LIKE FUCK YEAH BECAUSE YOU KNOW DANCERS ARE PRETTY LIMBER AND SHIT AND THEN SHE PUNCHES THE DJ AND IM LIKE FUCK AND SHES LIKE LETS GET OUT OF HERE AND ONE THING LED TO ANOTHER AND NEXT THING YOU KNOW WERE FLYING DOWN THE INTERSTATE AT 120 MPH AND THE HIGHWAY PATROL IS SHOOTING AT US AND DONT LISTEN TO POUNCER I WASNT REALLY HUDDLED IN THE BACK SEAT CRYING I WAS HANGING OUT THE WINDOW SCREAMING FOLLOW ME TO FREEDOM AND LONG STORY SHORT THAT CHICK KNEW HOW TO PARTY
by Gaknar on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 14 recs
I read that as "rectal slash rave" and thought THIS ONE IS GOING TO BE GOOD!
Then I saw my mistake. It was really good anyway.
You could hire a baboon, and you should win eight games.
-- Former WVU Heach Coach Don Nehlen on playing in the current Big East
by An 'eer with a beer on Sep 2, 2011 12:09 PM EDT up reply actions
agreed
no one else should be aloud to write these.
"I am a sinner that does not expect forgiveness. But I am not a government official."
by whiskey_soup on Sep 2, 2011 12:12 PM EDT up reply actions
goes on the EDSBS Commandments plaque
right after “Thou Shalt Not Rename The Fulmer Cup”
Mr. Simpson, this procedure could drastically increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you.
Hmmm... Increase my killing power, eh? Let's do it!
by car.full.of.midgets on Sep 2, 2011 12:18 PM EDT up reply actions
hive-ish
"I think so, Brain, but how are we going to get the bacon flavoring into the pencils?" -Pinky
"Cleveland is a giant petri dish of masochistic enabling." -Londonjoe
"Some mathematician has said that pleasure lies not in discovering truth, but in seeking it." -Tolstoy
I was just wondering how large the box Saban was standing upon in this photo was.
My guess: eight inches.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions
Depth perception trick
Saban is actually in Birmingham.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
by TexaninNYC on Sep 2, 2011 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Saban's response:
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
by DONSLIQ on Sep 2, 2011 11:28 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
up by 30 points, tackled at the 1, might be a TD?
yeah let’s challenge that
by vlad3217 on Sep 2, 2011 10:38 AM EDT reply actions 6 recs
The only redeeming factor to last night
Was that I ate a sandwich that consisted of a deep-fried pretzel bun, roast beef, bacon, and beer cheese.
I bid you farewell, commentariat. I must away first to the toilet, then to Dallas in order to miss the LSU-Oregon and Georgia-Boise games. If the plane is shot down, I will not be sad.
1950 NCAA Co-National Champions
by Old South on Sep 2, 2011 10:43 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
It'll be OK
/dibs on his TV and video games
"I think so, Brain, but how are we going to get the bacon flavoring into the pencils?" -Pinky
"Cleveland is a giant petri dish of masochistic enabling." -Londonjoe
"Some mathematician has said that pleasure lies not in discovering truth, but in seeking it." -Tolstoy
by MikeLew on Sep 2, 2011 10:45 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
That sandwich sounds like a heart attack on a plate.
by ElRocco337 on Sep 2, 2011 10:46 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
The toilet?
If I had eaten that sandwich [sic], I’d be en route to angioplasty this morning.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 10:47 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Idea
When A&M joins, send them the monkey paw and tell them it’s a good luck charm that allowed Alabama to beat Texas in the 1941 Rose Bowl. Don’t worry, they won’t look it up to verify.
by Gaknar on Sep 2, 2011 10:51 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
I can hear the phone calls already
Texas don’t unnerstayund tradishun like we does, PAAAAAWWWWLLLL, that’s wha the ESS EE CEEEEEE gave us this MONKAY PAAAAAAAAWWWWW PAAAAAAAWWWWWWLLLLL
"Disco?" He shakes his head. "What a dark time for our country."
by Burrito Electrico on Sep 2, 2011 11:31 AM EDT up reply actions
You mean they don't already have some version of it?
How do you explain the last decade or so of aTm footbaw, then?
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Sep 2, 2011 11:52 AM EDT up reply actions
Reverting to the mean after being forced to halting the cash inducements to join the football squad?
"Disco?" He shakes his head. "What a dark time for our country."
by Burrito Electrico on Sep 2, 2011 12:16 PM EDT up reply actions
OH SHIT
Oh, and the moon sometimes also looks like a C, but you can't eat that.
by Illusions, Michael. on Sep 2, 2011 10:53 AM EDT reply actions
Yeah, that was news yesterday.....
Personally, I’m all for it. Makes burning that couch a true test of fan dedication if you got 1-3 on the line.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:54 AM EDT up reply actions
But what if you got a new couch
and your old one was ratty and unsalvageable, and you have to get rid of it somehow…?
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Like I said, how dedicated to the cause are you?
If not so much, burn it in your back yard instead of the street.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 10:58 AM EDT up reply actions
Yet another attempt to clean up Sunnyside
didn’t work before and prolly won’t work now. Hard to arrest the entire population
Son, that’s Pitt. You hate Pitt now. You hate Pitt tomorrow. You hate Pitt until the day you die. After that, you will hate Pitt for eternity.’ — Jack Fleming’s Mom
What good does it do . . .
. . . to enact a felony statute that has no better chance of being enforced than the speed limit on US50?
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
I thought the curves enforced the speed limit on US 50.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:00 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Word.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 11:01 AM EDT up reply actions
On the eastern stretch . . .
. . . but the segment between Clarksburg and Parkersburg is about as good as I-68.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
This has nothing to do with footbaw
But I felt like you guys would enjoy this one
by NeedzMoarLolz on Sep 2, 2011 10:58 AM EDT reply actions 8 recs
I agree
I thankfully had my office door closed when I saw this bc I definitley laughed out loud.
by NeedzMoarLolz on Sep 2, 2011 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions
Last night coudlve been better
What's the deal with observational comedy?
by The Assman 1 on Sep 2, 2011 11:02 AM EDT reply actions 2 recs
UNLV feels like my liver this morning
by Ron Zook Owes Me a Liver on Sep 2, 2011 11:06 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You just made Kenny Mayne cry, you bastard.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:09 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
If I can cause him any more pain, I will.
That unfunny, self righteous bastard.
by Lucas Jackson on Sep 2, 2011 11:11 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Kenny Mayne is that like that gas station attendant who has a doctor brother, a lawyer brother, and a sister in aerospace engineering.
All of the other Sportscenter anchors from that generation were so good and Kenny Mayne became… Kenny Mayne.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 11:38 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Kenny's only real problem
is that his schtick just doesn’t work with a partner.
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His problem is that his schick just sucks.
Have you seen his “Mayne event” shorts on ESPN? HORRIBLE. Just painfully unfunny, and no partner involved.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
They make me chuckle.
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as a UNLV alum
I second this statement.
by vegas_buckeye on Sep 2, 2011 1:57 PM EDT up reply actions
Fate is Fickell
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 11:12 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Nutt-ier than a fruitcake
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Sep 2, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Thought we had a steal of a coach
Joker’s on us
1950 NCAA Co-National Champions
by Old South on Sep 2, 2011 11:36 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Joker's a good coach
But Morgan Newton is terrible. Like Spencer Pennington terrible.
Imma hang up and listen
Sounds like a brittle RB in Texas' backfield
/hopes Fozzy Whitaker is in plastic bubble until gameday
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
He's looked great in practice and is poised for a breakout year!
/pulls hamstring
//high ankle sprain
"Disco?" He shakes his head. "What a dark time for our country."
by Burrito Electrico on Sep 2, 2011 11:59 AM EDT up reply actions
Your RB has died of dyssentry.
Nick Bloomfield: EDSBS Hero.
by lhb98 on Sep 2, 2011 12:07 PM EDT up reply actions 4 recs
Any QB with any speed whatsoever is a great QB on NCAA Football X
/perfectly connects 50 yard pass while in full sprint
Imma hang up and listen
Not on Heisman-level
accuracy is horrible when throwing while sprinting
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
I haz.
Iz nice.
Defense actually plays zone like they’re supposed to. WRs drop a lot more passes though.
Are there still plays where the defender floats 10 yards to intercept the pass?
RAEG
Imma hang up and listen
Oh you mean where the linebacker jumps up into the air 10 feet to pick a ball off, one handed??
…yes, but not as often.
Except every time you pass against Alabama
Had to restart that game 8 times my first season in Dynasty Mode.
by Woo Pig Phooie on Sep 2, 2011 11:53 AM EDT up reply actions
Woohoo
A.I. turnover National Champions!
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
I've broken one controller
and threw another into the wall, which left a big ass hole in the apartment. Wife is still pissed about that one.
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
by DONSLIQ on Sep 2, 2011 11:55 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I was playing NCAA 07 against my devoutly baptist father
And Reggie Nelson literally moonwalked halfway across the field to pick off his quarterbacks pass. First and only time I’ve ever heard him say goddammit shit motherfucker
Imma hang up and listen
by El Andy on Sep 2, 2011 11:55 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
They usually just get knocked down.
Maybe my QB just isn’t good enough, but do not try to throw if there is a MLB playing zone in the middle of the field.
You MUST wait till your reciever clears the MLB before throwing.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
but you're sacked by then
The A.I. defensive line ain’t no joke this year. No matter who the opponent is
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
I tend to get sacked 5 times a game.
Part of it is I like to stand in the pocket Greg McElroy style, but if you aren’t in shotgun you better plan on throwing it quickly.
Actually in this year's game (my experience)
the pocket is your best friend. Get out the pocket and your going down VERY soon.
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
What makes it worse is that the AI knows
Where every god damn blitz is coming from like they have precognition.
My homemade blitzes worked great against All-american A.I.
Against Heisman? I might as give them the first down
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
It's quite frustrating
At least now coverage works well enough that I don’t have to blitz every down to get a stop.
All the linebacker blitz?
All the linebacker blitz.
The tackle from FAU is basically laughing in Carlos Dunlap’s face.
Sorry my reply was against four man rush
blitzes mean you’re fucked. LOL
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
There's one counter I have to the blitz
Quickly throw it to the TE before the coverage rotates over. If you see it coming you can hit the big play.
I've done that
but for some damn reason,, the QB throws it at the feet of your hot route receiver when you throw quick. That shit pisses me off because the gain potential is huge.
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
HB dump off consistently saves my ass
But I always have to be worried about the corner playing pressed or it’ll be a 5 yard loss.
True.
One thing that REALLY helped my passing game: Read Smart Football on a regular basis. The article on the triangle concept really helped my understanding of the passing game, especially flood plays.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
I really wish I had more time
I think smart football would be just excellent to read consistently
He who rides a tiger cannot dismount
It is. Probably the most underrated football blog on the tubes.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
Learned that the hard way.
Also, pump fakes are somewhat effective, and play fakes actually work now. In 11 running PA resulted my QB getting hammered 90% of the time. Now I still get crushed about 30% of the time where no one is fooled, but I actually get a chance to make plays now.
It's insult to injury if you complete a play
And Herbstreit in an almost mocking tone says that it freezed the safeties, when you had to complete a pass with a safety and corner in tight coverage.
Play action can be hit or miss
Rollout PA plays seem to work pretty well for me, but dropback PA plays usually end up with me getting dumped for a loss.
IndyDevil's Twitter
Okay, Dennis Erickson - don't screw this up!!
Even when catching is set to "Conservative" to decrease dropped passes, receivers still drop balls when they're hit
I was playing a season with Syracuse though.
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
It's worth it
if only for the new features:
-custom conferences
-coaching carousel
-full season of high school (overrated)
It Ain't Easy, But It's Worth It.
by DONSLIQ on Sep 2, 2011 11:48 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Gameplay for the most part is better
It would be nice if they’d patch the schedule bug that they said they would fix by August.
Which schedule bug is that?
Is it like the past years where there was no SEC rotation?
by Durdens Wrath on Sep 2, 2011 3:01 PM EDT up reply actions
They have VT playing BC and Clemson the same week in the 2nd season
I think it shows up again in later seasons.
I think teh coaching carousel is garbage.
I just had an 11-2 season with Southern Miss and my contract is up? Can haz better jerb? NO F U STAY WITH SOUTHERN MISS NO JERB OFFER FOR U
by broski on Sep 2, 2011 11:58 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I still play 2010 sometimes
Watching the Gators have their entire coverage team wiped out by FIU is a source of a lot of game resets.
It's like Joker told him not to go through a progression
Just throw to the first guy.
But he was also holding back in the pocket as Kentucky’s O-line was manhandled.
It was pretty weird.
Randy Sanders (OC) likes the players to be patient in the pocket
Hartline took a long time to throw as well. But nowhere near Newton’s time. I don’t think Newton dropped back and threw a single pass last night without dancing at least a little.
1950 NCAA Co-National Champions
Even though a lot of those passes largely seemed like arm punts
I’m not entirely sure why they called so many steak routes when they seemed incapable of hooking up on those.
Newton would be fine if he had a back to hand off to, a receiver to throw to, or a line to protect him
Then he could take 7 to stare down a covered receiver before throwing to him
1950 NCAA Co-National Champions
There was one point where it looked like a receiver caught a long ball
And then threw it to the ground as if to say, “NO SIR FU.”
by Charles UF on Sep 2, 2011 12:03 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Sounds like all you're missing from
2010 Florida Offense Bingo is an injured/suspended quarkback and coordinator who cribs Baghdad Bob.
Mr. Simpson, this procedure could drastically increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you.
Hmmm... Increase my killing power, eh? Let's do it!
by car.full.of.midgets on Sep 2, 2011 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions
Wow,
One of Bama’s awful QB’s set a low bar. Fantastic.
by Durdens Wrath on Sep 2, 2011 2:57 PM EDT up reply actions
great to have football back.
kind of weird to see Holly as the lead article on the front page of SI.com. Congrats.
I’ll grovel, as I do.
So my office in is having a wear red day to support UL-Lafayette (hometown team)
and I forgot and wore my LSU polo today.
/accidental TROLLOLLOLOLO LO LO
"It's not all about the game. It's about who you share it with." - Les Miles
by Matt 'n' The Hat on Sep 2, 2011 11:35 AM EDT reply actions
Yes.
And the best part is they each got a pair of tickets to their next home game. I got offered so many tickets just now because nobody actually wants to go.
"It's not all about the game. It's about who you share it with." - Les Miles
by Matt 'n' The Hat on Sep 2, 2011 11:56 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
If someone ever tried to get me to wear blue and red to work to support KU
I’d file suit.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:37 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
welcome to my 2 years in NE
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 11:38 AM EDT up reply actions
please have a good keg at my wake
and several casks of kraken
/y’all are invited except for the un-l fans.
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 11:42 AM EDT up reply actions
We shall line your casket with scarlet and cream.
by T-Jax, Field General on Sep 2, 2011 11:44 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
cool my high school colors
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 11:45 AM EDT up reply actions
this is sad
link to groupon offer by KU.
/my alma mater tried things like this pre-Snyder.
The time for calm and rational discourse is past, now is the time for senseless bickering -Anonymous the Younger
by Anon_the_younger on Sep 2, 2011 11:38 AM EDT reply actions
BC is selling tickets via Groupon this year, too.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
UVa has Valpak ads
That Hokie freshman in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters didn't see any of this coming.
Nah, that's FSU
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
So, Maryland starts their run on Monday. Youll see them in the top 25 before long.
What's the deal with observational comedy?
by The Assman 1 on Sep 2, 2011 11:40 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Get back to work, Van Pelt.
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by jonfmorse on Sep 2, 2011 11:43 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Hmmm, let's consult the Magic 8-Ball on that....
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 2, 2011 11:53 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Not so good? It's the worst !-ing email program on the planet is what it is
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Sep 2, 2011 1:50 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
But, unfuckingfortunately, I'm stuck with it....
It’s what the Corporate asshats decided we’d use.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
Outlook is the best alternative.
What’s better? Lotus notes? GROUPWISE???
I’ve had recent experience using all 3 and I’ll take Outlook EVERY. FUCKING. TIME.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 3:36 PM EDT up reply actions
I would rather have my scrotum clawed by starving cats
than use Outlook. Just archive my damned e-mail on the server if you need ass-coverage, and let me use the mail client I’m comfortable with.
Preferably one that isn’t a virus.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
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We're running Zimbra, which has its own set of problems
but it’s entirely web-based and also runs as IMAP for phone/tablet clients, which is nice.
My first employer had three different mail systems at once when I started, only to consolidate on Lotus Notes, which is a war crime of a program to use for email and NOTHING ELSE. They have since blown it to hell and are a Google Apps client, which I don’t know how I’d feel about from a server/security standpoint but which as workstation support would make me happier than Hendricks/ScarJo making out.
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
IBM is the client I work with
And Lotus Notes is awful, but free.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
Sorry if this has been said
But that gif sums that game up in it’s entirety
I got 99 donuts cuz a bitch ate one.
Twitter: gregory_forbes
by Pain in the Sash on Sep 2, 2011 12:07 PM EDT reply actions
Hey there EDSBS
Latest MS PAINT:
http://prevailandride.blogspot.com/2011/09/conference-realignmentpocalypse-part-17.html
by Thujone on Sep 2, 2011 2:02 PM EDT reply actions 9 recs
You, sir, are a freakin' genius in this medium.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
Amazing. Simply amazing.
@papaalphakilo
This concludes Tuesday’s episode of Everything Notre Dame Does Is News, So Deal With It. - Miz Holly
by PAK on Sep 2, 2011 3:37 PM EDT up reply actions
Arian Foster tweeted that I was sick because I cared about FIU/NT ony cause of my fantasy team.
We're all on the Hindenberg. No reason to fight over a window seat.
Ugh.
Don’t remind me of that abortion.
"I don't know; we haven't played Alabama yet." -Vince Lombardi
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