DON'T SAY LANE KIFFIN DIDN'T LEAVE A LEGACY AT TENNESSEE
PAUSE PLEASE: we actually think Lane Kiffin is doing a fine job at USC given his circumstances. They continue to recruit well with what they can offer, were competitive in the Pac-10 and should be fine in this year's new and improved Pac-12. So don't accuse us of presenting the man like he's not a nuanced character without his virtues. He's complex, like Iago, King Lear, or Garfield. He has his moments like all of us: good, bad, and SO INCREDIBLY SEXY IT HURTS.
We're not saying there's a correlation, but only nine of 22 players from Lane Kiffin's only recruiting class remain in Knoxville, so we're saying there's a one hundred percent correlation between making your players pose shirtless around an orange Lamborghini and bad scholarship retention. (In positive news, Tennessee does get Janzen Jackson back after straightening out whatever sent him home for a while.)
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I wonder how Illinois DT Chris Jones would react?
Bloggin' at JoePasDoghouse.com
by J.Schnauzer on Jul 6, 2011 2:26 PM EDT reply actions 10 recs
RARRRGHH CHRIS JONES ANGRY CHRIS JONES SMASH
by Mango Stasi on Jul 6, 2011 2:31 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
something like this perhaps?

" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Jul 6, 2011 2:36 PM EDT up reply actions 8 recs
I'll have it known that I lived in Chelsea
and it was a damn nice neighborhood.
Fish meat is practically a vegetable
by Bourbon_Meyer on Jul 6, 2011 2:41 PM EDT up reply actions
Pre-trial diversion program
But only if the kid transfers to USC.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
"Illinois DT Chris Jones does not like football players rubbing baby oil all over each other"

Go Bulls!
"Chris Jones spelled backwards...

…is Senoj Sirhc"
by TiderinMS on Jul 6, 2011 4:14 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
watching a Cubs game during college on WGN
relatively tight game, Cubs down by a couple with a man or two on, 7th inning or so. As the tension builds, Harry says, “Wouldn’t it be a great time for” and you’re thinking a base clearing double, three run homer, or the batter to shake off his recent slump, but no, Harry continues “for an ice … cold …. Budweiser.”
Immedaitely left couch for a somewhat cold Budweiser.
RIP.
I’ll grovel, as I do.
by dirt sandwich on Jul 6, 2011 4:41 PM EDT up reply actions
So did Harry
Except that an intern delivered his so he didn’t have to leave the mic.
Another classic Harry story is with the WGN cameras focusing on a young couple in the stands engaged in a fair amount of PDA. After a few cutaways, Harry announces, “I’ve finally figured it out! He kisses her on the strikes, and she kisses him on the balls.”
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Jul 6, 2011 4:48 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
That second one is a great story!
I wonder if he was quoting Dizzy Dean, or if the story is apocryphal and has been attributed to multiple people…
"I think so, Brain, but how are we going to get the bacon flavoring into the pencils?" -Pinky
"Cleveland is a giant petri dish of masochistic enabling." -Londonjoe
"Some mathematician has said that pleasure lies not in discovering truth, but in seeking it." -Tolstoy
At this point, Harry Carey stories are like Yogi Berra sayings
Or, as Yogi put it, “I never said most of the things that I said.”
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
My favorite one
according to Bob Uecker (via Norm MacDonald), Carey would always get hammered beyond belief during spring training. So they’re at a steakhouse and he’s shitfaced and Uecker pays the waitress a bunch of money to serve them topless, and Carey is freakin’ out – “That fucking waitress’ tits are fucking hangin’ out!” – except everybody is in on the joke and they act like they don’t notice and tell him he’s just imagining it cause he’s drunk…“You tellin’ me you don’t see that girls tits?!”
"I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed, but I do say no more than 10 to 20 million killed, tops...depending on the breaks." - Buck Turgidson
It's only weird if you make eye contact.
_________________
I'm Banana dammit!!!
by BurritoBrosShits on Jul 6, 2011 2:27 PM EDT reply actions 2 recs
Or if you're um, staring somewhere else, no?
Why do boys get to have all the pleasure?
Because we let them.
by Chloe Denmark on Jul 6, 2011 2:56 PM EDT up reply actions
Is it bad that I was more perturbed by the stretch-marks than the gun?
by LoneStarHoosier on Jul 6, 2011 2:38 PM EDT up reply actions
I thought that was Tim Robbins at first glance.
by fluffy_bunny_feet on Jul 6, 2011 2:39 PM EDT up reply actions
Jim Tressel, is that you?
"It's not about style. It's about winning the game. That's it." - Chip Kelly
by Duckfanatic10 on Jul 6, 2011 2:53 PM EDT up reply actions
i think it is the guy who owns the redsox, John Henry
I’ll grovel, as I do.
by dirt sandwich on Jul 6, 2011 3:00 PM EDT up reply actions
Obligatory

Dawg fan by birth,
no longer in Beaumont by the grace of God.
by Dawg in Beaumont on Jul 6, 2011 2:33 PM EDT reply actions
At least they know how to properly wash it off now
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 2:39 PM EDT reply actions 12 recs
I'd say this also proves there's one hundred percent correlation
between making your players rub baby oil on each other and poor shower discipline.
As far as I'm concerned, you can drop off the Earth. That's a promise.
by fortlauderheel on Jul 6, 2011 2:39 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Damn, beaten to the punch.
As far as I'm concerned, you can drop off the Earth. That's a promise.
by fortlauderheel on Jul 6, 2011 2:39 PM EDT up reply actions
Nah, HIVEMIND
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 2:41 PM EDT up reply actions
Wouldn't this have been more of a story if
they had NOT used oil on each other? I mean, look at those posters.
/KY at UT
"Hello, Nicholas Sparks. My pets adore your children's books." -Spencer Hall
Also, Fuck Clemson.
It's Tennessee.
Could have just as easily been Karo Syrup.
Because college football is too important to be left to the professionals.
by Spencer Hall on Jul 6, 2011 2:42 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
or maybe CITRUS extract
/highfives HBC
"Hello, Nicholas Sparks. My pets adore your children's books." -Spencer Hall
Also, Fuck Clemson.
I don't know if I'll ever be able to look at Pecan Pie the same again.
Damn you Swindle.
...and the drunks all think I made it, and the girls all twist and shake it like they do; all my playground fears have faded, replaced with grown up nightmares that have come true...
by Boozy McHound on Jul 6, 2011 2:55 PM EDT up reply actions
Or is it Hall since it's in the comments?
...and the drunks all think I made it, and the girls all twist and shake it like they do; all my playground fears have faded, replaced with grown up nightmares that have come true...
by Boozy McHound on Jul 6, 2011 2:56 PM EDT up reply actions
Another possibility in Tennessee
BERRY: It’s strange we have to take our shirts off for the team meal, but if it means catered Cracker Barrel, I’m cool with it. Say, where are the napkins?
KIFFIN: Oh, don’t worry about that, Eric. Just dig in.
by Nick's Hat Band on Jul 6, 2011 3:45 PM EDT up reply actions
OH HO HO HO HO

NOW DACOACHO HE WANNA USEAH CATAFISH BLOOD INSTEADA BABBAHERL BUTTADAH COACHKIFFUN HE SAIDAH BLOOD DON SHINEAH LIKEAH DA BABBAHERL.
BUT DACOACHO JUS GOHEAD EN USEAH DA CATAFISH BLOOD ANYHOW.
You get that chocolate milk!
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Jul 6, 2011 2:47 PM EDT reply actions 14 recs
Howling laughter once I figured out what BABBAHERL was
Seriously, getting funny looks right now. Don’t care, that shit is funny. Making me laugh today is especially difficult for reasons I won’t get into, but THANK YOU for a small ray of sunshine in what has been a pretty shitty day.
I aim to misbehave
Who rubbed down Monte?
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 2:48 PM EDT reply actions 2 recs
No one.
Those are just his natural juices.
by Nabb1 on Jul 6, 2011 2:50 PM EDT up reply actions 8 recs
rec'd
and flag’d
...and the drunks all think I made it, and the girls all twist and shake it like they do; all my playground fears have faded, replaced with grown up nightmares that have come true...
by Boozy McHound on Jul 6, 2011 2:56 PM EDT up reply actions
Why would you ever say JUICES?
Why do boys get to have all the pleasure?
Because we let them.
by Chloe Denmark on Jul 6, 2011 2:57 PM EDT up reply actions
I guess I could have gone with "precious fluids."

by Nabb1 on Jul 6, 2011 3:15 PM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
luckily I was able to interpret these feelings correctly.
"I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed, but I do say no more than 10 to 20 million killed, tops...depending on the breaks." - Buck Turgidson
If Bama had a poster...
Not sure where they’d find a Lambo, but guaranteed that the shirtless players would be bathed in the tears of children, personally collected by Saban himself.
by WrathofCaan on Jul 6, 2011 2:49 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Is living amongst these people as amazing as it seems it would be?
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 3:00 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I need to move to Bama
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 6:01 PM EDT up reply actions
that isnt the only one
i’ve seen a houndstooth tahoe, F-150, and chevy 3500 on various roads in ol Bammy. although, 2 were on I-65 between Mobile & Montgomery.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
GTHTSUN
by CoastalCowbell on Jul 7, 2011 5:36 PM EDT up reply actions
Is that paint or houndstooth wallpaper stuck on a car?
"UVa is pain, highness. Anyone who tells you different is selling something." ElRocco337
I couldn't tell how it was done, even relatively up close
It was either painted on with a stencil and then clear-coated or it was a very professional film/sticker job on a white car (including pushed into creases and under seams) and then waxed to a shine. The “A” was definitely a decal, all chrome had been sprayed flat black.
I thought it would be rude to touch since it appeared the owner was watching me from the window of the coffee shop.
My guess it's a vinyl car wrap. Graphic design firms and printing companies make them.
They’re more and more common and much less expensive than a custom paint job.
I aim to misbehave
THIS
(drinks)
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
What. He. Said.
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
.
No more tears National Championships
by Mango Stasi on Jul 6, 2011 2:54 PM EDT up reply actions 16 recs
How the fuck a baby get shampooed with no tears?
The Twitter, she is sometimes amusing
by emc503 on Jul 6, 2011 3:19 PM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
Looks like someone is doing the chicken dance.
by fluffy_bunny_feet on Jul 6, 2011 3:51 PM EDT up reply actions
Has anyone on that sideline ever actually SEEN a chicken?
by Dr. Norris Camacho on Jul 6, 2011 3:58 PM EDT up reply actions
Not since Phil Fulmer's reign of terror.
by Lights, Camera, MACtion on Jul 6, 2011 3:59 PM EDT up reply actions
I heard Fulmer took up a hobby in his retirement...

"All you need is bacon and a dream."
by jc001 on Jul 6, 2011 5:04 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
It's important to stay busy in your golden years; it's good for the body and the mind...

by Mango Stasi on Jul 6, 2011 5:10 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Ive never gotten why Bill Parcells is in this
He isnt that fat nor is he a college coach.
"All you need is bacon and a dream."
I thought he was just there to cheer on Weis in the next match.
毎日は土曜日であるべき
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Jul 6, 2011 6:08 PM EDT up reply actions
outstanding
"slide that greasy pig out and BAM!...chocolate cake." Mordecai
by thetennesseethumper on Jul 6, 2011 11:25 PM EDT up reply actions
Why do I always think of Faith No More's Mike Patton when I see a Kiffin headshot?
by Lights, Camera, MACtion on Jul 6, 2011 3:55 PM EDT up reply actions
it's DERP! What is DERP...
Fish meat is practically a vegetable
by Bourbon_Meyer on Jul 6, 2011 3:55 PM EDT up reply actions
Aw, man, don't say that.
I like Faith No More.
by Nabb1 on Jul 6, 2011 3:56 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
So that's the brand
a team uses to slide down the polls week by week. What wonders will never cease.
Patiently waiting for The Golden Era to kickoff at Sun Life Stadium.
Competitive in the Pac-10
Game 4: Crush Washington State (because duh).
Game 5: LOLZ LOSE TO LOCKERDAWGS AT HOME
Game 10: Restore some luster to the season by upsetting Arizona in Tuscon.
Game 11: LOLZ GET THUMPED BY BEAVS
Conclusion:

I love green because money be green.
_____________________
Twittin
by Joey C. on Jul 6, 2011 3:24 PM EDT reply actions 2 recs
Competitive in the Pac-10
/chipkelly.jpg
Game 1- Lose to Boise St and have star RB punch a kid
Game 12(?)- Lose to Ohio St
Game 24(?)- Lose National Champ to Auburn
Game 25- ERROR ERROR FILE NOT FOUND
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 3:27 PM EDT up reply actions
BIG LEAST
LOL
/retreats to crying corner and repeats “eveything will be okay” until hoarse
The Twitter, she is sometimes amusing
I found myself slightly heartened by Lyles on Bomani Jones' show today
IF THINKING “OH GOD, MAYBE CHIP WONT BE FIRED” COUNTS AS HEARTENED.
/sigh
The Twitter, she is sometimes amusing
C'mon
You don’t really think they’ll can ‘im, do you? If Auburn has shown us anything, it’s that even implausible deniability will see you through.
I love green because money be green.
_____________________
Twittin
Large Picture is Large. And In Charge.

by Board Certified Scrotologist on Jul 6, 2011 6:50 PM EDT up reply actions
Chizik not having a damn clue as to what is going on around him sounds perfectly plausible to me
Cammy Cam not knowing about the payment, though, sounds patently ridiculous.
I love green because money be green.
_____________________
Twittin
by Joey C. on Jul 6, 2011 7:55 PM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
You do mean
as good at not getting caught.
B/c for all the shit y’all monkeys fling, it just doesn’t seem to stick to any of the coaches down South. (NOTE LANE KIFFIN DOESNT COUNT HE’S IN PAC12 HE’S Y’ALLS NOW DONT COUNT DONT COUNT)
Fish meat is practically a vegetable
by Bourbon_Meyer on Jul 6, 2011 3:51 PM EDT up reply actions
damn, that wasn't as wild & irresponsible of a troll as I meant it to be
meant to insinuate the SEC schools weren’t dirty cheaters like the godless heathens up in B1G country. Blew it. Trollin skillz b rusty. Thank goodness for this pre-season conditioning.
Fish meat is practically a vegetable
by Bourbon_Meyer on Jul 6, 2011 4:26 PM EDT up reply actions
Maybe.
If Gruden turns them down.
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 3:31 PM EDT up reply actions
/notsureifserious.jpg
Because, um, 4 losses in 2 years sounds pretty good to me.
I love green because money be green.
_____________________
Twittin
Try losing 1 in 2 years
/MWC’d
Also, as Oregon has shown, being competitive in the Pac-10 still doesn’t win the OOC games.
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 3:51 PM EDT up reply actions
Wait, what?
Oregon won 3 out of 4 OOC games last season. Call it 1 out of 2 (both from the SEC) if you don’t want to count New Mexico (cough, MWC) or Portland State (and why would you).
2 out of 4 in 2009, 1 against a B1G squad and 1 against the #18 team in the nation.
If you’d like to go back to ‘08 (and let’s do), that’s 3 out of 4. If you’d like to disregard Utah State (be my guest), then it’s 2 out of 3, including Purdue (again) and the OH NOEZ 2008 BIG 12 Okie State Cowboys.
2007, you say? Well, sure. Rough year, 2007, what with losing Dixon during what looked like a sure Heisman campaign. Still, he reeled off wins against Houston, Michigan, and Fresno State. If you only want to recognize Michigan out of that group, I’ll understand. Still, Houston and Fresno make for decent mid-majors. Anyway, there’s also the facepunting of South Florida with Justin Roper of all people at QB.
I think that covers Chip’s time with the team, both as OC and HC. That puts him at 12 out of 16. Or, if you’re just talking “big games,” 6 out of 10.
This is all beside the fact that my original post was intended to poke fun at Lane Kiffin’s competency, and not to generally aggrandize Oregon football. Definitely didn’t mention TCU anywhere.
For more effective trolling, please look in your handbook and turn to the section entitled Step Yo’ Game Up.
I love green because money be green.
_____________________
Twittin
by Joey C. on Jul 6, 2011 4:28 PM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
FACTS: BROUGHT.
Fish meat is practically a vegetable
by Bourbon_Meyer on Jul 6, 2011 4:32 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
FANTASTICO
The Twitter, she is sometimes amusing
by emc503 on Jul 6, 2011 4:52 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I just meant the highly publicized ones
Like the bowl games or the Boise game to kick-off the season.
No one cares if you beat up on middling teams from other conferences if you can’t beat the big ones when everyone is watching. Trust me, I’m a fan of a non-BCS school.
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 4:58 PM EDT up reply actions
Are we seriously going to start this "important games" thing again?
All games, publicized or not, are important. Boise can tell you you about losing how losing a non-publicized game on a Friday night can ruin a season.
Will work for football.
by purwho on Jul 6, 2011 5:03 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Wow. Grammar fails so terribly. Take two:
Boise can tell you about how a non-publicized Friday night game can ruin a season.
Will work for football.
rec'd for creative use of grammar that made me laugh
"UVa is pain, highness. Anyone who tells you different is selling something." ElRocco337
Right
That’s why I tallied both the “Total OOC Record” and “Big (re: Highly Publicized) OOC Record.”
We’ve said our respective pieces. I’m sure we can leave our statements to stand on their merits and know that we’ve done our part to return the backbiting around here to football-related matters.
I love green because money be green.
_____________________
Twittin
At least we can agree to hate Boise, right?
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 5:06 PM EDT up reply actions
Boise state or just the city Boise.
Are you talking to me? Are you taling to me?
by I am the truth on Jul 6, 2011 5:08 PM EDT up reply actions
yes.
Why do boys get to have all the pleasure?
Because we let them.
by Chloe Denmark on Jul 6, 2011 5:09 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Gad, have you been there?
"What you are entrusted to do as a coach is to create an environment where your players have a chance to be successful." CHIP KELLY
And this is how you make up on the internet.
Why do boys get to have all the pleasure?
Because we let them.
by Chloe Denmark on Jul 6, 2011 5:09 PM EDT up reply actions
Hating Boise validates them.
I’m not prepared to go that far.
"We may have to retire this feature, because the final story in this post will never be topped for sheer Spicy Livin' outside of the silver screen or our own imaginations."
by Silver Britches on Jul 6, 2011 5:09 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
You'll save that for after the first week this year?
毎日は土曜日であるべき
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Jul 6, 2011 5:34 PM EDT up reply actions
No because we're going to win.
"We may have to retire this feature, because the final story in this post will never be topped for sheer Spicy Livin' outside of the silver screen or our own imaginations."
by Silver Britches on Jul 7, 2011 8:49 AM EDT up reply actions
Random question
What is the area around the city of Boise like? Flat? Hilly? Mountainous?
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 7:17 PM EDT up reply actions
Thank you
"I find nothing more depressing than optimism."
by Truffle Shuffle on Jul 6, 2011 7:19 PM EDT up reply actions
Flat to the south, flat to the east. Desert.
"What you are entrusted to do as a coach is to create an environment where your players have a chance to be successful." CHIP KELLY
Lane Kiffin was "a habitual line stepper"

"When a woman says "nothing's wrong," that means everything is wrong. And when a woman says "everything's wrong" that means EVERYthing is wrong. And when a woman says something's not funny, you'd better not laugh your ass off." H. Simpson
by Sasquatch Love on Jul 6, 2011 3:32 PM EDT reply actions 6 recs
Sssslap!
Enjoy yourselfs bitches
"When a woman says "nothing's wrong," that means everything is wrong. And when a woman says "everything's wrong" that means EVERYthing is wrong. And when a woman says something's not funny, you'd better not laugh your ass off." H. Simpson
by Sasquatch Love on Jul 6, 2011 3:40 PM EDT up reply actions
CHALLENGE him to a derp-off. CHALLENGE HIM!
AND MAKE SURE YA PEOPLES IS THERE TUH SEE IT!
by Llewelyn Moss on Jul 6, 2011 4:03 PM EDT up reply actions
UGA strength and conditioning would call these gentlemen "dandies."

"We may have to retire this feature, because the final story in this post will never be topped for sheer Spicy Livin' outside of the silver screen or our own imaginations."
by Silver Britches on Jul 6, 2011 3:48 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
"And I thought I pissed off the locals and left a trail of destruction"

http://twitter.com/EmotionalFescue
by Emotional Fescue on Jul 6, 2011 3:50 PM EDT reply actions 8 recs
The Ole War Skule
"Put me in a college football stadium press box on a Saturday afternoon, and I'm more giddy than a 13-year-old at a Miley Cyrus concert." - Mark Schlabach
by Matt 'n' The Hat on Jul 6, 2011 5:03 PM EDT up reply actions
I mean this from the bottom of my heart
I LOVE LANE KIFFIN. LONG MAY HE REIGN IN SOUTH CENTRAL.
I aim to misbehave
Did somebody say baby oil?

For the record: Jedd Samardzija =/= Bo Jackson

Bloggin' at JoePasDoghouse.com
Unlike Auburn players...
…I don’t believe Notre Dame players are allowed to sign contracts with sporting goods manufacturers. So NFL weight programs might also have contributed to Vince’s greater mass.
Running backs/outfielders tend to be bigger than pitchers/wideouts.
joemorgan.jpg
Tennessee: A "Right-to-Work" State
Otherwise I would have thought that a job for the Volunteer “Hostesses”

I have no idea where to put this, but college sailing is on the U
"UVa is pain, highness. Anyone who tells you different is selling something." ElRocco337
So, um, can we get some pics?
"Fandom is irrational and emotional and therefore should be fun." - Wolverine Liberation Army
Twitter: sportsgeek42
Now Playing: VIII
Open thread here. Fan-shot edition.
"UVa is pain, highness. Anyone who tells you different is selling something." ElRocco337




























