THE CURIOUS INDEX, 3/21/2011
by Spencer Hall on Mar 21, 2011 10:29 AM EDT
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PrintTONIGHT THERE'S GONNA BE A JAILBREAK. It was a moderately busy but star-intensive weekend for the Fulmer Cup, so hello, Thin Lizzy live in Australia in 1978. Look at the crowd and know that you cannot outclass Australia for redneck cred. "Oh, yes I can. Do you know how many members of my family are sunburnt ex-convicts who drink a 12 pack a day?" Aussie: "Um, all of them? Like mine?" You: "[surrenders]"
CRIME ONE: Who likes to rock the party? Michael Floyd likes to rock the party. The Notre Dame wideout picked up a misdemeanor DUI in South Bend, which if we know Indiana law enforcement involved a small, discreet arrest that immediately became a SWAT raid by the Indiana Excise Police. This marks Floyd's second DUI arrest in fifteen months, though the sequel is disappointing for its lack of bloodstains, fighting, and zero characters named "Shady." Points to be awarded in Fulmer Cupdate later this afternoon.
CRIME TWO: Mark Barron, Alabama's leading returning tackler, covered for his cousin in a single car accident and received a "hindering prosecution" misdemeanor for his troubles. Our wife was once involved in a jury trial where a guy's alibi for having a stolen car was that a man named "Sam Capers" had let him borrow it. He did not have the number for Mr. Capers, nor an address, nor could identify him. We now add the following name to our list of "Horrible alibis never to use ever":
Barron told the officer his car had been taken without permission by a man he only knew by the nickname "Bull," Levy said.
Bull? Oh yeah, that dude. Always gallavanting about Mobile taking cars willy-nilly. Both crimes will be assessed in a separate update, but to put things in perspective, their totals should equal 5% max of Auburn's aggregate score at the moment.
KENNY STABLER SHOULD SUE JODY HILL FOR EVERY DOLLAR HE HAS. The Snake is so obviously the inspiration for everything Eastbound and Down ever did, since Kenny Powers is at least 60% Kenny Stabler with elements of John Rocker and Mitch Williams thrown in for plausible deniability. If/when Kenny Powers starts his own Tequila line (and that being the most douchebag 1993 idea ever, it is certain to happen,) you'll know we were right since the Snake is marketing his own wine, 12, which goes for $11.99 a bottle and is a way better deal than the Albert Means Chardonnay or the C. Newton Estates Muscadine Sherry. (Both of those are in the luxury range, of course.)
Also: BOAT PICTURE. Ladies, claim you saw a mouse and screamed. It's far more socially acceptable than admitting you just had an orgasm looking at that photo. (HT: Roll Bama Roll)
RYAN SEACREST WAS A "FEISTY" FOOTBALL PLAYER. The only TV person less likely than Seacrest to be a "feisty" high school football player would be Conan, and even then we can see Conan as a jump-ball wideout in endgame situations. As for a quick draft:
- Jay Leno: tackling dummy. If he dies, he dies.
- David Letterman: sarcastic PA announcer
- Jimmy Fallon: Slot receiver. Better than expected moves, but blocking from the Roots makes him seem better than he actually is.
- George Lopez: Weak-side linebacker.
- Craig Ferguson: QB. I dunno why, but he seems like the 9/26, 2 INT type who pulls victory from his ass.
- Jon Stewart: he was a soccer guy, so kicker.
- Stephen Colbert: undersized free safety with penchant for lunatic hits after the whistle.
- Jimmy Kimmel: D-line. More aggressive than you might think. He did used to have sex with Sarah Silverman, after all.
THAT'S CHEATING. Even in the most specious preseason lists, you may no longer call Boise State a BCS Buster, unless you'll let us say things like "Florida's a dark horse contender for the SEC East!" and "Got a good feeling about this Ohio State team!"
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The only things that can happen at a place called "Shotgun Willies"
Are either amazing or truly terrible. They are usually the same event, it just depends on your point of view.
As a Mobile resident
“Yes” and “yes” to both statements
There are also only a few things that can happen on Michigan Avenue.
None of them are good.
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
YOU!
I sent you message. I think.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 11:11 AM EDT up reply actions
Indeed. Response forthcoming.
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
the term, in australia
is bogan, not redneck.
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
[fosters reference goes here]
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 10:35 AM EDT up reply actions
i have it on firm authority
bogans despise fosters. VB is the beer of choice. particularly the 2 liter Darwin Stubby bottle.
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
Fosters: Australian for marketing.
by BelmontVol on Mar 21, 2011 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
No no, it's
Fosters: Australian for Budweiser.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Mar 21, 2011 10:43 AM EDT up reply actions
this is australian for "redneck"
BEHOLD THE BOGAN! EN A TODO SU GLORIA!
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
Can't be a bogan...
the beer’s too small.
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 10:50 AM EDT up reply actions
You assume its beer
I’m 99% sure its wood grain alcohol
by Nick Fairleys Hitlist on Mar 21, 2011 10:51 AM EDT up reply actions
you can forgo the darwin stubby
if you’ve got the esky seat filled.
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
It's VB
it’s beer. nominally.
The twitter
Anfield Asylum, sbnation's very own open zoo for the most dangerous game: Liverpool fans
"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair
Ah, Bogans.
I am in favor of no sport which puts a stick in the hands of an Irishman - K.K.R.
by saxattack29 on Mar 21, 2011 11:08 AM EDT up reply actions
chopper suggests
that you harden the fuck up.
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
by kleph on Mar 21, 2011 11:26 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Oh, hello there, karmic anvil. I was wondering when you would show up.
No, I’ll just stand right here. You go ahead.
Transmogrified up in this piece!
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Mar 21, 2011 10:35 AM EDT reply actions 10 recs
OH HAI!!
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 10:49 AM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
/clank
Transmogrified up in this piece!
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Mar 21, 2011 10:50 AM EDT up reply actions
and the anvil is falling, falling on your head
but you’re just picking your knickers from your arse
like you’re playing a one stringed harp
like you’re playing a one stringed harp
like Wile E Coyote
as if the fall wasn’t enough
those bastards from ACME
they got more nasty stuff
salt in my wounds
sticking in the boot
we’re all bulimic
but keep forgetting to puke
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:15 PM EDT up reply actions
flyin out soon / killin time
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 11:13 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I never understand
why any of these players agree to any sobriety tests.
by ParadigmShift35 on Mar 21, 2011 10:35 AM EDT reply actions
"I'll take Saturday Night for $200, Alex."
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 10:39 AM EDT up reply actions
In Texas you no longer have a choice!
If you don’t want to blow, there’s a nurse waiting to take your blood on Friday and Saturday nights.
YEAH TEXAS!
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 10:59 AM EDT up reply actions
in Souf Kahlina...
If you don’t blow it’s an automatic 6 month license suspension. The officer takes it from you on the spot.
Heil, Po-leece State!
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 11:01 AM EDT up reply actions
Wheee illegal per se
I had the pleasure of being in Columbia on other matters while that was being debated. The MADD contingent was out in full force FOR THE CHILDREN!
by PalmettoTiger on Mar 21, 2011 11:05 AM EDT up reply actions
Not that I don't disagree with the inherent sarcasm of this comment...
but… I feel, this might be necessary:
POLITICAL WARNING ALERT!
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 11:11 AM EDT up reply actions
Duely noted
Now, back to where we were…Why do you hate the children?
by PalmettoTiger on Mar 21, 2011 11:35 AM EDT up reply actions
It's not that I hate the children, it's just....
… well, there are better uses for them.
/modestproposal’d
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 11:39 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Phil Knight likes the way you think
and is interested in your newsletter.
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 11:53 AM EDT up reply actions
driving isn't a right
it’s a privilege- – - -one you pay for, and pay taxes for, and are mandated to pay insurance for………..but they’re doing you a fovor and don’t forget it
"Well, say, this beats croquet. There's more go about it!"
The trick is to not let it get that far
Once the officer has probable cause, you’re doomed. I’d still wager that in over half the times the officer asks he doesn’t yet have PC and is just hoping to get lucky, and it almost always works.
Isn't it pretty easy for them to argue probable cause with vehicle-related cases?
Proud member of the Fax Girl fan club.
by billycthulhu on Mar 21, 2011 12:19 PM EDT up reply actions
It depends on why they've pulled you over
If they’ve pulled you because you can’t stay in your lane, yes. If it’s because you were speeding, not always. That’s where people volunteering helpful info like “yeah, I had a couple beers ossifer, but I drunk not yet” usually comes into play.
We have ‘No-refusal’ DUI checkpoints now.
tl;dr:
The roadblock starts at 11 p.m. and runs to 4 a.m. Saturday at an undisclosed location. The difference between other safety checks done by police and this one is that prosecutors and a judge will be standing by.
Most checkpoints on the roads are fine and don't require PC or anything of the sort
As long as they’re not enforced arbitrarily or unreasonably, they’re pretty much legal.
Sorry.
The list is long, but distinguished.
Six month license suspension is much preferred to DUI conviction.
And outside of an accident with injury/fatality, most cops aren’t going to bother getting a warrant to draw blood.
/Prof. Bishop’s Muni Courts’d
My only argument is you're stupid.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 21, 2011 12:00 PM EDT up reply actions
'No Refusal Weekends'
Ugh. What happens when someone refuses the blood draw? Do they wrastle ‘em down and draw it anyway?!? This has seemed like a bad idea since it’s inception a few yrs back. What exactly does ‘no refusal’ mean? Sounds like a Dare to me.
by Uncle Earmuffs on Mar 21, 2011 11:10 AM EDT up reply actions
In Alabama
a mandatory blood draw is only allowable for an accident causing bodily injury, and even then needs a DA to sign off. I have no problem with that.
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
Yeah, in TX they have the judge on speed dial.
Cops say “probable cause” judge says “yeah sure ok” and goes back to sleep
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 11:17 AM EDT up reply actions
Right -- judge, not DA
but sounds like Tejas doesn’t have such restrictions like bodily injury.
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
I've never quite understood
why this isn’t a 5th Amendment violation. If I don’t have to testify in court, why do I have to give breath/blood that could be used as evidence against me?
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 11:30 AM EDT up reply actions
Implied consent
You don’t have to drive on the road.
The argument is that by driving, you agree to giving the sample.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
This.
You give up a ton of liberties by opting to use public roadways.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Mar 21, 2011 11:32 AM EDT up reply actions
To quote the estimable Mr. White,
“They were stopping EVERYBODY driving down that particular sidewalk…that’s profilin’…and profilin’ is WRONG.’
"Wer viel Bier trinkt, schläft gut. Wer gut schläft, sündigt nicht. Und wer nicht sündigt, kommt in den Himmel!" Martin Luther
by Go Big Rev on Mar 21, 2011 1:45 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Hovercar.
Lets see the FAA try that shit.
Twitter.com/SenatorGiggity
by SenatorGiggity on Mar 21, 2011 3:28 PM EDT up reply actions
Hah. You'll be begging for the state patrol.
FAA gets nasty when it comes to booze.
You: I CAN HAZ AIRPLANE KEYS?
FAA: Have you consumed any alcohol within the past 8 hours?
You: YES. [HICCUP]
FAA: LOL SIR NO F U. YOU CAN HAZ LOSS OF ALL PILOT RATINGS. NO MOAR ATP LICENSE FOR U.
14 CFR Part 91.17
Alcohol or drugs.
(a) No person may act or attempt to act as a crewmember of a civil aircraft—
(1) Within 8 hours after the consumption of any alcoholic beverage;
(2) While under the influence of alcohol;
(3) While using any drug that affects the person’s faculties in any way contrary to safety; or
[(4) While having an alcohol concentration of 0.04 or greater in a blood or breath specimen. Alcohol concentration means grams of alcohol per deciliter of blood or grams of alcohol per 210 liters of breath.]
(b) Except in an emergency, no pilot of a civil aircraft may allow a person who appears to be intoxicated or who demonstrates by manner or physical indications that the individual is under the influence of drugs (except a medical patient under proper care) to be carried in that aircraft.
© A crewmember shall do the following:
[ (1) On request of a law enforcement officer, submit to a test to indicate the alcohol concentration in the blood or breath, when—]
(i) The law enforcement officer is authorized under State or local law to conduct the test or to have the test conducted; and
(ii) The law enforcement officer is requesting submission to the test to investigate a suspected violation of State or local law governing the same or substantially similar conduct prohibited by paragraph (a)(1), (a)(2), or (a)(4) of this section.
[(2) Whenever the FAA has a reasonable basis to believe that a person may have violated paragraph (a)(1), (a)(2), or (a)(4) of this section, on request of the FAA, that person must furnish to the FAA the results, or authorize any clinic, hospital, or doctor, or other person to release to the FAA, the results of each test taken within 4 hours after acting or attempting to act as a crewmember that indicates an alcohol concentration in the blood or breath specimen.]
(d) Whenever the Administrator has a reasonable basis to believe that a person may have violated paragraph (a)(3) of this section, that person shall, upon request by the Administrator, furnish the Administrator, or authorize any clinic, hospital, doctor, or other person to release to theAdministrator, the results of each test taken within 4 hours after acting or attempting to act as a crewmember that indicates the presence of any drugs in the body.
(e) Any test information obtained by the Administrator under paragraph © or (d) of this section may be evaluated in determining a person’s qualifications for any airman certificate or possible violations of this chapter and may be used as evidence in any legal proceeding under section
602, 609, or 901 of the Federal Aviation Act of 1958.
My only argument is you're stupid.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 22, 2011 9:56 AM EDT up reply actions
Also, you can thank MADD.
I’ll leave at that rather than risk Yon Banhammer.
by ElRocco337 on Mar 21, 2011 11:33 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
There's a banhammer on this site?
Proud member of the Fax Girl fan club.
by billycthulhu on Mar 21, 2011 12:21 PM EDT up reply actions
Yeah, brah...
You don’t want to rile up Aunt Stabby.
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 12:25 PM EDT up reply actions
Especially if she's off her meds
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 12:59 PM EDT up reply actions
I believe that is the law in Florida.
Basically, when you get your license you consent to breathalyzer tests, whether you want to or not.
Of course, I could be wrong, as I’ve never looked this up or been stopped.
Live to fly!
Go Gators!
Yes and No
With a driver’s license you are saying you will take a sobriety test but if you refuse one, you lose your license for a year.
by ParadigmShift35 on Mar 21, 2011 3:10 PM EDT up reply actions
But can apply for a hardship license within 30 days.
I remember it. My parents are had me later in life, at little.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Mar 21, 2011 3:12 PM EDT up reply actions
Or
Lived very long. I, on the other hand have had the chilling experience of the blue light special shining just for me. I have also been blessed to have been stopped by some really decent cops. May you never have to answer silly questions on the side of the road.
Kinda surprised by the amount of Pro Drunk Driving going on today
If you’re drunk, don’t get behind the wheel of a car, pretty simple. I don’t care whether or not you can refuse the sobriety test or not. You broke the law and put lives at risk, time to go to jail.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
by stempke on Mar 21, 2011 11:46 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I wouldn't call it pro-drunk driving
Moreso not a fan of the methods used to reach a desired outcome.
Like I said, I don't care
If it keeps drunk drivers off the road, stop everybody leaving the bar at closing time. No good comes from making it easier for people to get away with driving home bombed.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
Anti-tank weapons can keep drunk drivers off the road too.
"Smell the perfume but don't drink it because it might kill you." Erin Andrews recounting advise from Gary Pinkel
YAY STRAWMAN
That didn’t take long
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
STRAWMAN ON FIRE!
/eats towel
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
/eats strawman
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Mar 21, 2011 12:29 PM EDT up reply actions
/sues strawman
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:31 PM EDT up reply actions
/crows eat the crops of distracted and flaming strawman
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:33 PM EDT up reply actions
/gives strawman breathalyzer test
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 1:27 PM EDT up reply actions
I go away for a few days and have to re-train
I must have missed the whole creation of the
/eats X
/sues X
/pays off X’s gambling debts
riff. I have no frame of reference.
And what does a towel have to do with it? Douglas Adams told me to always have one close.
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 12:48 PM EDT up reply actions
Friday night fan post
re: UNLV
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:49 PM EDT up reply actions
/eats frame of reference
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:50 PM EDT up reply actions
Towelie says you should always have a towel...
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 12:50 PM EDT up reply actions
I live to please.
"Smell the perfume but don't drink it because it might kill you." Erin Andrews recounting advise from Gary Pinkel
It's illustrative of the overall point
It’s well and good to say “if it stops drunk driving then so be it,” but that statement doesn’t address any of the nuance of balancing the public interest against personal rights. And having been involved in a few DUII trials myself, there is generally a boatload of other evidence and jury bias in favor of the prosecution that renders mandatory blood draws ultimately unnecessary in making the state’s case.
And that’s before you mention the part that mandatory blood draws should be a Constitutional violation.
I love green because money be green.
good point
Proud member of the Fax Girl fan club.
by billycthulhu on Mar 21, 2011 12:22 PM EDT up reply actions
not all are explosive
like the hedgehog:
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 11:56 AM EDT up reply actions
look above for a sneak preview of Oregon's new uniforms!
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 11:59 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
not all are explosive
like the hedgehog:
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 11:56 AM EDT up reply actions
Those do no good
if the drivers are already bombed.
/showsselfout
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
I would be more for this than random (not so random) road blocks.
I also have no issue with forcing people to blow into a tube if pulled over.
But taking my blood on the side of the road kinda creeps me out. I would rather you just put me in the back of the car and haul away or do the immediate license suspension. (which is the general outcome of these things anyways). Why waste the time on the intermediate step?
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 11:54 AM EDT up reply actions
This
I don’t get it either. In Japan, the legal limit to drive is .03. Essentially, don’t sniff alcohol and get in a car. Yet every few months someone on base would get caught driving drunk. I understand it’s a bit more frustrating in most parts of the US because you can’t rely on decent public transportation, but really—that’s no excuse. Don’t have a drink then get behind the wheel. The issue isn’t tickets or methods for ascertaining, it’s that you’re a dumbass for drinking and getting behind the wheel.
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 1:04 PM EDT up reply actions
As a frequent bar closer,
I wish that bars had breathalyzers so that you had a more accurate idea of what your situation was before you walk out. My rule of thumb is not more than 1 drink per hour and I’m OK to drive, but I’d still be scared to get pulled over in that situation.
How much longer till kickoff?
I keep a cheap but reasonably accurate brethalyzer in my car.
The only problem is, in many states it’s a DUI to even be in the car with the keys. So on the night that it was 2 am (everything closed) and I blew a 0.9, I was still eligible for a DUI because I refused to stand outside in 40 degree weather while I waited to sober up.
This
You can get a DUI for sleeping it off in your car in the bar parking lot if the keys are in the car with you. What do they expect you to do, leave the keys on the ground outside the car as an invitation to steal your car and all your shit?
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
/eats keys
Weoejuwejhdjwe!
Twitter
by Chekhov's Spread Gun Option on Mar 21, 2011 3:21 PM EDT up reply actions
Keys can't be in the ignition
Car pulled over on side of road, turned off, keys in your pocket= probably okay.
Car pulled over, turned off, keys in ignition= enjoy a ride to the police station.
Walking towards your car
with your keys in your hand is enough for a set of handcuffs.
I remember it. My parents are had me later in life, at little.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Mar 21, 2011 3:11 PM EDT up reply actions
I've been in this situation more than once
Every time, the cop asks “Are you planning to drive?” and as long as I had a legit reason “I’m just getting my coat” they’ll just watch and make sure you do what you said and leave the car behind.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
I think that's only if you're in the driver's seat.
I usually curl up in the back seat. But I’ve never had my premise tested.
How much longer till kickoff?
Heh-heh, "reasonably accurate breathalyzer".
Ain’t no such animal that can stand up in court, thankfully. Sadly, I’ve basically forced the local sheriff’s department to blood draws if they want charges that will stand up in court, but let’s just say the science behind breathalyzers is unsettled at best.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Mar 21, 2011 6:29 PM EDT up reply actions
Allow me to clarify
It provides a result that rarely varies across multiple immediate trials and is approximate to what the police breathalyzers available here produce, as demonstrated by head-to-head comparisons. Whether that is objectively reliable is beyond my expertise, and also my concern, at least for the purpose of whether or not I choose to drive. Should I get popped one day, however, I’ll consult a colleague.
Some countries do
New Zealand had them in all bars. They were expensive to use and usually broken, but they were there.
The list is long, but distinguished.
Oh, believe it or not,
I agree with you that drunk driving is a seriously bad idea.
I have qualms about the BAC levels, and the field sobriety tests, but the vast majority of the people I represented way back when were way over the legal limit, so it was more academic than anything.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
I actually don't have an argument with the "suspension-if-refused" concept
Driving is a privilege, not a right, so the state certainly has the option to decide under what conditions a person can drive or not. What I’d argue against is the forced taking of blood, if that really happens.
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 11:53 AM EDT up reply actions
As I recall
and this is totally off the top of my head, so take it for what it’s worth- there’s no mandatory drawing of blood, it’s just that you either have to give the blood, or you get suspended for a length of time.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
Responsible bar owner is responsible.
I don’t think it’s pro-DUI, just an overabundance of lawyas. We like to argue contrarian points.
My only argument is you're stupid.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 21, 2011 12:03 PM EDT up reply actions
It has nothing to do with being a bar owner
It has to do with being an EMT and Firefighter in a small town. I’ve been to far too many accidents in which some innocent person was maimed or killed while the drunk idiot walked away relatively unharmed.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
City people take a lot of things for granted...
that cabs are an option is one of them, and being close enough to walk is another. Try catching a cab or walking anywhere in Lake County Florida. (the mosquitos will kill you first)
I drank what? - Socrates
by Steve from Umatilla on Mar 21, 2011 1:22 PM EDT up reply actions
Then plan ahead an have a DD
There’s really no excuse for driving drunk
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
by stempke on Mar 21, 2011 1:24 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
find a friend with a >6 months preggo wife
always assured she’s well rested and sober + upgraded to minivan for more spacious bar to home drunk delivery.
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 1:31 PM EDT up reply actions
Well, there's always the argument
that .08 BAC isn’t really “impaired” by any standard. It’s only the DUI level because the Feds wanted it there and would deny federal highway funds to any state that didn’t pass it.
What do actual reaction time tests compared against BAC say? I’d bet that .08 is unnoticeable.
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 1:31 PM EDT up reply actions
You are adding too much gray to the Black and White of sempke's point of view.
Any statement against the DUI Laws means you (and I) are evil drunk drivers; regaurdless of weather the law is unreasonable, ineffective, or hinderance to officers doing there duty.
/blackandwhiteargumentisblackandwhite
I drank what? - Socrates
by Steve from Umatilla on Mar 21, 2011 1:42 PM EDT up reply actions
their duty
they possess the duty, sorry.
I drank what? - Socrates
by Steve from Umatilla on Mar 21, 2011 1:44 PM EDT up reply actions
You shouldn't drink and type
“their” isn’t your only problem there, man.
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 1:46 PM EDT up reply actions
Explain to me how the enforcement of the law, by definition, the duty of the officers
is a hindrance to their duty. Are their people for whom .08 is not drunk? Yes, but also there are people for whom .08 is plenty drunk. Once you start adding subjective measures into the law, you’re asking a police officer to decide whether or not you have too much to drink. Now instead of discouraging drinking and driving, you’re discouraging inexperienced drinking and driving. You’re allowing the habitual drunk drivers to have an advantage over those that do not make it a regular occurrence.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
What is the purpose of the law?
To keep people from crashing their cars because they’re drunk. So yes, the officer gets to decide if you appear to be too inebriated to drive, just like he gets to decide in the first place if you appear to be so inebriated to warrant a breathalyzer. Or that the fact that your trunk is so low to the ground that maybe something interesting is in there.
Why is it OK to let him have the latitude to decide if you get the test, but not if you’re just too drunk to drive?
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 2:25 PM EDT up reply actions
Speaking only for me
I would rather the officer have the latitude to order the test, and let the chips fall where they may, vs giving the officer the right to try you right there on the spot.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
Because they don't actually get that much leeway in terms of who gets the test
They are required to perform either a field sobriety test or a breathalyzer or both, if they suspect the driver has been drinking. So under your plan, they would be required to decide you’ve “had too much to drink” at the slightest indication that you’ve been drinking.
The reality of it is, we’re never going to a system in which the law is different for everyone. You’re either going to get BAC limits or we’re going to a “not a drop” policy.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
They already do decide you've had too much to drink at the slightest indication that you've been drinking
It leads to fun cases where you’re actually below the legal limit, but the state moves forward with the case anyway because the officer is prepared to testify that you were clearly inebriated in his estimation. And getting a jury to question the officer’s testimony (or rather, his recollection of it, because good luck trying to argue he might be lying) is litigation seppuku.
/Honestly,Ijusthadone
//cuffs
I love green because money be green.
Actually, cops do have substantial leeway with breathalyzers as with other matters
At least in my state, blowing > .08 isn’t illegal. Driving impaired is. The former just makes it much easier for the prosecution to obtain a conviction thanks to special evidentiary rules. Cops are well within their discretion to arrest you if you don’t blow, or if you blow < .08, and are also in their discretion to let you go with a >.08.
The list is long, but distinguished.
So, supposing you're driving without a license
and get pulled over. Refusing to take a test then could not violate any implied consent laws, since you had never taken out a driver’s license.
/amiright?
//reductoadabsurdium’d
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 6:59 PM EDT up reply actions
AHHH.
Why most states, I believe now charge you with a DUI and not a DWI. “under the influence” could mean REALLY FUCKING TIRED. I think this is my concern. If I had, for some reason, a sever reaction to medications, I could be arrested for a DUI, but OH lookey there! My breathalyzer shows 0.001.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 7:31 PM EDT up reply actions
That actually doesn't concern me at all
There’s strong empirical evidence suggesting that driving while moderate to severely sleep deprived impairs you more than driving from .08 – .15.
The list is long, but distinguished.
No. This is totally true.
I’m just playing devil’s advocate in that breathalyzers, to refuse to do one and then, to blood check is for people who are stopped at check points or who the law is “iffy” about. I’m not saying it shouldn’t be used. But it, plus the moves from DWI to DUI is a catchall, but for the greater good. But if I’m obviously impaired but refusing to blow (in Texas) because know I haven’t been drinking, what good does it do? None. It’s impreical data (I think that’s right, it’s late) for the officer who saw no evidence of “unsafe” driving. Same logic of “well, you had a tail light and I was going to give you a warning but now that I see you have no seatbelt on, here’s a ticket” It’s a safety issue. Just I don’t like it when people don’t treat it that way.
Driving is a perk. It’s not a right. Using a public road should be deemed as a perk for everyone (even you bike riders of the pedaling variety). I mean you can get a DUI on a lawnmower, in a backhoe, or in a bobcat. If you’re doing something to put yourself or others in undue risk, the law is allowed to prevent your stupidity.
/sorry for rambling.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 11:33 PM EDT up reply actions
Also, sorry if I pissed anyone off.
It’s not intentional. Promise. I really think it’s a good idea to keep people who drive anythign stupidly off the roads and the rest of us safe.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 11:50 PM EDT up reply actions
Or *SHOCKING* don't drink
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 1:49 PM EDT up reply actions
Well, that's just a shit ton to expect right there.
/really sarcasm
/am DD often because I don’t trust people
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 1:53 PM EDT up reply actions
Funny how
people put so much effort into complaining about the law/how it’s enforced or how to get around it or how not to get caught, when the answer is really simple. Lawyer it all you want, make it a civil liberties complaint, bring in the ACLU for all I care. But for crying out loud, don’t drink before you get behind the wheel, and you don’t have the problem, do you?
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 1:56 PM EDT up reply actions
Or, as I used to say
Drink all you want, just don’t drive.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
Actually there is a problem
Because the intent of the law is to keep drunk drivers off the road — fair enough. The problem I have with it is that they’ve defined “drunk” down to “had a drink.”
Now the crime is to have had a drink before one got behind the wheel, not actually being drunk. This is the same crime as “open container.” What if those open containers are all the empties you picked up from a picnic site, being a good Boy Scout? You didn’t drink them, but an open container in the passenger compartment is now the crime, not drunk driving.
Oh, I should have put them in a trash bag in the trunk and not toss them into the back seat? Now my crime is not properly bagging my trash.
The libertarian in me says “no.”
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 2:04 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
You're right
we should all have individually tailored BAC’s, because I know that I’m impaired and don’t want to drive (even though I could) after one drink, but others are “oh, I’m good” after 5-6 drinks, and sure, I trust them.
Lawyas, make it happen.
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 2:07 PM EDT up reply actions
Now you're getting the idea
even though you’re being sarcastic. Pull me out of the car. Make me walk the line. Make me do any test of reaction time you want. Back flips over a handy pommel horse. Whatever.
Just don’t take a trace amount of CH3–CH2–OH in my bloodstream as prima facie evidence that I’m intoxicated.
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 2:17 PM EDT up reply actions
See my reply to Steve up there
What your advocating doesn’t discourage drunk driving, it discourages “inexperienced” drunk driving. You’re making the law much more difficult to enforce and making it easier for drunks to drive without repercussions.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
Is the point of the law
to prevent accidents caused by drunks or not? If one is not liable to cause an accident because one is an “experienced drunk,” then what’s the problem?
Your premise is faulty. You don’t really believe there is an “experienced drunk” — otherwise you wouldn’t care if one were on the road, because you’d know he has the “experience” to not be a problem. You believe he’s just a time bomb waiting to go off, and should be removed from the road.
I’m not saying you’re wrong. I’m saying that an arbitrary limit should not be the deciding factor for determining DUI. The BAC calculators tell me that for my body weight, 5 beers in a hour puts me at .07. Would you feel comfortable seeing me put down five beers in your place within an hour and then driving off? Or in your judgment would that be too much, even though technically I’m under the limit. Assume the .07 figure is correct.
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 2:32 PM EDT up reply actions
If you're putting down five beers in a hour in my place
You probably shouldn’t be on the road, because by the time you leave, the alcohol has not been digested.
I offer complimentary cab rides to anyone in my bar that has had a few to many and doesn’t have the cab fare to get home.
My point was not that an “experienced” drunk is safer on the road than an inexperienced one. The are both likely to kill someone, the point is that an experienced drunk would be better at fooling the police officer or saying the necessary things to keep him on the road. In that way, he is MORE LIKELY to cause accidents than the guy who doesn’t drive drunk much and goes to jail when pulled over.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
And my point was
that if five beers in an hour didn’t put me over the .08 limit, by the law, I’m perfectly fit to drive.
Yet in your judgment, I should not be driving. So essentially, you are in agreement with me that .08 should not be the test, but actual impairment.
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 2:47 PM EDT up reply actions
Alright then, let's get rid of BAC limits all together
And decide that anyone drinking can’t drive. I’d be more in favor of that, than I ever would instituting a law that is completely devoid of objectivity, opening the door for abuses of power and allows for more drinking and driving. And not only that, it would make our society even more litigious, by opening up a cut-and-dried law to arguments and disagreements.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
I agree with you in principle
but there has to be some sort of objective standard. it would be nearly impossible to subjectively judge the sobriety of every driver pulled over.
The only time I’ve been pulled over after drinking, I failed the coordination tests miserably – due probably to nerves. But I knew I wasn’t intoxicated and happily blew a .03 and was free to go.
I remember it. My parents are had me later in life, at little.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Mar 21, 2011 2:53 PM EDT up reply actions
In practice, however
Both things exist- you have to violate some traffic law or ordinance in order to get pulled over, at which time the BAC comes into play.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
which I did
I didn’t mention the running the red light ticket that he still decided to give me. But I still drove off.
Dick of a cop wouldn’t let me take a leak on the side of the road and I damn near wet myself. I only ran the light b/c I was in such a hurry to get home to pee.
I remember it. My parents are had me later in life, at little.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Mar 21, 2011 3:00 PM EDT up reply actions
Did you explain to him
“If you’d drank as much as I have, you’d need to take a leak too!”
?
How much longer till kickoff?
I'm terrified to weigh in here
But do you really don’t mean at all do you? You mean to tell me you’ve never gone to dinner with the wife and had a glass or two of wine and driven home in absolute pants-pissing fear of getting pulled over?
I’ll add that I am a heavy user of cabs and car services when appropriate.
I remember it. My parents are had me later in life, at little.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Mar 21, 2011 2:00 PM EDT up reply actions
I've lived the last 7 years
in a country with an outstanding public transportation system that enables the wife and I to enjoy a beverage if we so choose.
If we’re driving, then only one of us drinks. It’s not that hard.
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 2:09 PM EDT up reply actions
If that were an option here
it would be no question. But calling & waiting on a cab b/c I want a glass of cab with my steak on a Friday night, and then calling and waiting on another cab to leave the restaurant gets cumbersome. If we’re drinking to enhance the meal and not to get sloppy, I’m gonna go ahead and drive and roll the dice that I’ve got a better lawyer than the State.
This wknd, on the other hand, I KNEW I was going to a wedding to drink ALL.THE.GIN. and had the car service lined up the week before.
Moderation and sensibility go a long way in this discussion – the ones who cause the problems are the ones who don’t use it.
I remember it. My parents are had me later in life, at little.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Mar 21, 2011 2:30 PM EDT up reply actions
Look, I agree
that you’re PROBABLY okay with a glass of wine. But some people aren’t. If you’re worried about getting stopped, then forego the cabernet. If you’re not, then don’t. Me, I don’t have the drink, or the wife doesn’t have the drink. For us, that’s just how it has had to be, with .03 the limit in Japan. I see no reason to change, though, now that we’re back in the US. A pain, yes, yes it is. But don’t blame me, blame the jerks killing people on the road.
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 2:34 PM EDT up reply actions
And this, ladies & gents,
is why I drink at home – I can’t get a DUI stumbling from my recliner to my bed. Also, I’m cheap.
by Oglethorpe's Revenge on Mar 21, 2011 7:34 PM EDT up reply actions
Well, now, I wouldn't say cheap.
How about thrifty?
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 7:36 PM EDT up reply actions
Thrifty
is probably the better adjective to use. Either way, the sentiment is the same.
by Oglethorpe's Revenge on Mar 21, 2011 7:57 PM EDT up reply actions
Often DD?
I’d gotten the impression you were always DD.
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
I see what you did there.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 2:33 PM EDT up reply actions
So, as you and I are both ND grads
and both are on the harsher end of feelings towards driving after drinking, what’s your thoughts on punishment for Floyd? I totally condemn DUI, but a friend of mine is writing facebook posts about how he should be stripped of his scholarship. I’m not so sure I feel that strongly about it, especially with no details like BAC, circumstances, etc. What do you think?
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 1:55 PM EDT up reply actions
Trying to come up with a good-faith joke tying together you two, moralizing, and ND Nation
Failing. Sorry. I’ll stick with Tennessee from now on.
The list is long, but distinguished.
He should be suspended
I don’t know how much, but it should be for at least a few games. Yeatman got kicked off the team and Ragone received no punishment. I don’t know what the reasoning for the inconsistent treatment considering they were both backup TEs.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
Charlies was coach with Yeatman
and Kelly was coach for Ragone. Take that for what it is worth.
I’d like to see more details come out, but yeah, I could see a game or two suspension.
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 2:10 PM EDT up reply actions
Are you kidding me?
I would be writing my senator everyday.
by ParadigmShift35 on Mar 21, 2011 11:12 AM EDT up reply actions
Do you not have to?
Can you say no thank you officer when they say “I am going to perform a field sobriety test”? What are your next steps afterwards as the pulled over party?
Not because I drive drunk, or whatever
But just because I would like to know, these lawya things interest me, then again, I also don’t want to have 2 glasses of wine and get popped either when I am not impaired.
step out of your vehicle and drink all the rum
PROBLEM OFFICER?
Weoejuwejhdjwe!
Twitter
by Chekhov's Spread Gun Option on Mar 21, 2011 3:24 PM EDT up reply actions
/bribes officer with the rum
/eats towel
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 4:20 PM EDT up reply actions
Nope.
See discussion of implied consent. You can refuse to take the tests, and that will trigger jailarity (depending on state, etc).
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
but then you get out of the felony DUI, most likely for lack of evidence?
I guess jailtime and no felony DUI is better than Jailtime + DUI
Depends on the result of your blood test
A blood test is much stronger evidence than a breathalyzer. Breathalyzers don’t work if you’ve recently used breath spray or something. Blood tests don’t lie.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
The problem is it
so depends state by state, so I can’t really give advice, even in the broadest terms.
One possible issue with blood tests is the concentration of blood- is it serum, or whole? In the states in which I have talked law for money, the concentrations are set forth in the statutes themselves.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
best bet
is to stop by a good DUI lawyer’s office, give him $50 bucks and chat with him for a few minutes.
I had a longer post written up but decided that a) bad to give advice I’m not licensed to give and for a state I don’t know about and b) I don’t want to be giving DUI avoidance advice on the internet, even under a pseudonym.
Best avoidance is to not drive after drinking. But you should definitely know your rights and know the proper steps you should take in the event you’re driving relatively responsibly and should happen to get pulled over.
I remember it. My parents are had me later in life, at little.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Mar 21, 2011 3:48 PM EDT up reply actions
Harrumph!
This is not a place for reasoned discourse and rational action, this is the internet! Pistols at dawn, sirrah.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
pistols?
sounds like something a Nazi would suggest.
…
…
…
…Hitler.
I remember it. My parents are had me later in life, at little.
by Bourbon_Meyer on Mar 21, 2011 4:23 PM EDT up reply actions
Congratulations!
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
Having taken and passed a field sobriety test
I second not driving after drinking, especially if you’re tired. Those things are scary as shit.
More drunj than he lets on.
It varies by state, but in Alabama you can refuse.
Implied consent in Alabama only applies to the blood/breath test after you have been validly arrested. However, refusing the field test could contribute to whether the officer has probable cause to arrest you for DUI, depending on the circumstances. You can mitigate this if you state a valid reason for refusing (unsafe near fast cars passing, steep drop-off, raining, etc.).
Bad news: Alabama does not have hardship licenses. So getting a DUI will really screw up your life for a few months.
Needs Morehead.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 10:44 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
at least they have plenty of good hookers
/rugby joke, anyone?
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:17 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
only difference
my ancestors weren’t sent to Kentucky for stealing sheep
"Well, say, this beats croquet. There's more go about it!"
No, they just do things to their own sheep.
WHYS DA GUMMMINT IN MY BARN BEDROOM, PAWWWWWWL?
My only argument is you're stupid.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 21, 2011 1:52 PM EDT up reply actions
In our bet to determine if Alabama players were thugs like Auburn's players
It has been clearly shown that both universities harbor the unwanted fibers of our moral society. Here you are, one dollar.
BUT PAWWWWWWL HE WAS BEIN A GOOD COUSIN AND WASNT SNITCHIN HE DESERVES A STATUE IF YOU ASK ME
by Nick Fairleys Hitlist on Mar 21, 2011 10:40 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
This is SEC football man....
minor scrums like this are called “the weekend”
Fumbles. It was always Fumbles
Carlos Mencia: strong side linebacker
Runs to scrums late to steal tackles from George Lopez.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Mar 21, 2011 10:41 AM EDT reply actions 4 recs
"Sir, would you care to sample our new wine, 12?"
From Stabler Vineyards? Hmm, I’ve heard good things but never tried it. What can you tell me about it?
“Well, sir, it’s a bold red with a strong nose and hints of blackberry, cardamom, cinnamon and Nyquil. It comes highly recommended by some of our most discriminating customers. They tell me it’s excellent for pairing with Spam and does a fine job warding off the shakes without causing hallucinations or blood in the urine.”
Indeed? Well-aged, I trust?
“Of course, sir. Nearly a week.”
Bully. I’ll take a pint bottle in a brown paper bag and a package of Slim Jims.
by Tracer Bullet on Mar 21, 2011 10:45 AM EDT reply actions 6 recs
Stolen from elsewhere
Putting Kenny Stabler in charge of a wine endeavor is like putting the Cookie Monster in charge of the Girl Scouts.
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
figured i'd thrown these out there:
#KelvinSampson4UT
#JohnPelphrey4UT
#BrucePearl4UPig
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 10:45 AM EDT reply actions
Sing me a song, you're a singer
Do me a wrong, you’re a bringer of evil
The devil is never a maker
The less that you give, you’re a taker
So it’s on and on and on, it’s heaven and hell, oh well
He just needs a cape.
In all likelihood, probably five.
I wish I was kidding. One day the school will start caring about basketball. However, until that day everybody’s just going to have to be content with being the last team into the tournament every 10 years. This is fun!
However, "five" is "twenty" in PSU basketball years.
--
A T-bone steak, cheese, eggs, and Welch's grape.
@scrappled
Slow States - Football, music, craft beer, and podcasts with an industrial slant.
by Run Up The Score on Mar 21, 2011 10:53 AM EDT up reply actions
Is this the photo you were looking for?
by WannstacheRides on Mar 21, 2011 1:00 PM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
YOU HAVE CHOSEN POORLY!!!!!
"Wer viel Bier trinkt, schläft gut. Wer gut schläft, sündigt nicht. Und wer nicht sündigt, kommt in den Himmel!" Martin Luther
Sorry
But as a penitent man I could not let that pass.
by WannstacheRides on Mar 21, 2011 2:45 PM EDT up reply actions
In the meantime . . .
. . . you’ll soon have a college hockey team to root for, as Jim Delaney sets about fucking up one of the last quasi-major collegiate sports that money hasn’t completely spoiled.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 11:09 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Leadershit
"Hey--where's Perry?"
Notre Dame Fighting Irish by birth and undergraduate degree
U. Hawaii Warrior because the government pays my grad school tuition
by Kelly's Gyros on Mar 21, 2011 1:11 PM EDT up reply actions
Yeah, Boise St. as a BCS Buster is kind of silly
But how about TCU… Better do it soon, since you’re going to be in a BCS conference next year!
Proud member of the Fax Girl fan club.
facts
are not necessary.
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 10:55 AM EDT up reply actions
New favorite question for Alabama State Troopers
“Got 12? Please step out of the car, sir,….”
I also liked Stabler’s response to what kind of snake is on the label:
“I don’t know what that is,” Stabler said Friday. “It’s a friendly snake, though. Not a poisonous one.”
To be fair, I think the evidence points out that Kenny feels that all bottles of alcohol are friendly.
by sullivan013 on Mar 21, 2011 10:54 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Kenny Stabler Wines - Turrible
I went to a wine tasting where Mr. Stabler was signing bottles. Folks were lining up to kiss his feet and share stories with him (“Remember when we met 15 years ago at the quarterback club in Elba?” Stabler: “Sure.”) Surprisingly, Stabler was not drinking his own wine and appeared sober.
Anyway, we tried the wines. Underripe grapes aged upwards of three days. Honestly, the worst line of wines I have ever tried in bottle or box.
We bottle of Carmenere as a courtesy since it was $10, probably will be a gift to a Bammer. My wife wanted to try to convince him her initials were “WDE.” I didn’t think he’d fall for it (after talking to him, I think I was wrong). We went with “Rammer Jammer,” since that’s my favorite song to sing after Auburn beats Bama.
You got a bad bottle.
The screwtop had gone corky.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
Actually, they had corks (fake corks)
(I know you were joking, but) I tasted the wines the wine rep was pouring; I will never open the bottle I bought. Just as a 40-year-old Coke bottle for sale is not meant to be drunk, so it is with these wines.
Yow.
So you bought a 1976 Billy Beer, did you?
Ugh.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
I figured a "Kenny Stabler" signed anything would seem like a good gift to a Bammer
despite costing me just $10. Problem I didn’t consider: I can’t think of any Bama fan I like well enough to give this wine to, yet hate enough to give this wine to.
I went to law school with tons of them
Pretty much all of them fit into that “like enough to give this wine, also hate enough to give this wine” category for me.
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
I understand
You have a perfect “cut direct” gift, and need a target.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
mix it with some sundrop
and pour over crushed ice
/bamastyled
"Well, say, this beats croquet. There's more go about it!"
I kinda think Kenny's a genius on this one
Think about it: probably not too many of the Bama sidewalk fans are wine connoisseurs. But he knows if he slaps his number on it, does a couple ads, and autographs bottles a few times, they’d drink his piss. So he’s basically given himself 100% of the redneck Bama fan wine market for life.
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
Wouldn't Utah be the original BCS buster?
Or does playing PItt not count?
"I'm colonel cool! And I'm the captain on this rocket to the stars!"
FUCK PITT.
and Clemson.
And Iowa.
And other teams.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 11:00 AM EDT up reply actions
AND DUKE.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
Sadly, I think I have to root for Duke the rest of the way...
I hate them, but at least then there’s only be 1 group of obnoxious blowhards constantly talking about the greatness of their program.
If OSU or KU wins, I don’t think I could bear it.
Ceterum autem censeo, Iowa esse delendam.
Given those choices
I’ll root like hell for Duke. OSU is unpalatable.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
If OSU or KU wins, I don’t think I could bear it.
What an ugly thing to say. I abhore ungliness. Does this mean we’re not friends anymore?
by PalmettoTiger on Mar 21, 2011 11:39 AM EDT up reply actions
You were legitimately allowed to root for Butler the entire way last year
No reason you can’t do that again this year.
I for one, with my brackets completely destroyed, will be pro-VCU and pro-Butler until no longer possible.
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 11:40 AM EDT up reply actions
Nope - hate Butler too. Still bitter about the Final Four last year, and Draymond getting fucking clotheslined for a no-call.
Seriously, this bracket is turning into my worst case scenario.
Ceterum autem censeo, Iowa esse delendam.
YAY DUKE!
If for no other reason, fuck UofA. I can’t believe I had to root for fucking Texas yesterday and it was all for naught. I was also rooting for the meteor/the terrorists to destroy my hometown. No fun.
And I have a degree from VCU, so there’s that.
Fuck your crosswords, Stanley!
/hides in fear behind desk
//Watched the “Did I Stutter?” episode
They hit the road doing 90
Leavin' them steel mills far behind
Ain't no good life down at the Ford plant
Three guitars or a life of crime
by Dawg in Beaumont on Mar 21, 2011 11:21 AM EDT up reply actions
So did I. In 1985.
When it was Emilio Estevez and Judd Nelson.
by Albino Tornado on Mar 21, 2011 11:38 AM EDT up reply actions
Stanley = My FIL's Avatar
My only argument is you're stupid.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 21, 2011 12:08 PM EDT up reply actions
#LearnersPermitCoach4Mizzou
MAKE IT HAPPEN, ALDEN! I’LL STOP SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT YOUR TICKETING/PARKING POLICIES FOR AT LEAST SIX MONTHS IF YOU DO!
It's a funny name.
by Turd Ferguson on Mar 21, 2011 11:26 AM EDT up reply actions
Let's see what Vanna White has to say....
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 11:05 AM EDT up reply actions 5 recs
Indeed
Dumbest foul in basketball history?
Dumbest foul in basketball history.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
Pretty much, yes.
After the first foul, I thought “that’s the dumbest foul I’ve ever seen.”
The universe saw fit to correct me seconds later.
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
It won this by virtue of breaking the record
Which was set less than two seconds of gametime earlier.
The list is long, but distinguished.
Someone (A GIRL) in my pool picked VCU, FSU, and Marquette.
I was in first place until last night and now I’m staring up at like a 25 point deficit.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Mar 21, 2011 11:30 AM EDT up reply actions
I (not A GIRL) picked VCU, FSU and Butler
And also had Syracuse as my champion.
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
A lot of my friends are Syracuse fans
And while I’m not, I generally do root for them. The butthurt on facebook last night was so unbelievably even I had to enjoy it and troll accordingly. Anyone that picked Syracuse to go far is getting what they deserve. JUST ASK THIS GUY
"Anyone that picked Syracuse to go far is getting what they deserve"
Replace Syracuse with Pitt and you get my entire bracketing philosophy. I had them going out in the Sweet 16, so the butthurt from my buddies who had them in the finals was so damn enjoyable.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Mar 21, 2011 11:37 AM EDT up reply actions
THIS.
With Pitt, the question is not whether they will choke. It’s simply when and how it will happen. Unfortunately, I always give a 1 seed a pass for two rounds (even if I get the feeling they’re going down in the second, my record at picking 8-9s is so bad that I’d have the wrong team beating them anyway) and thought it would be Belmont they faced in the Sweet 16. (In hindsight, Belmont and Oakland both got their worst possible matchups – Belmont, a pressing and trapping team, against a team that just doesn’t fucking turn the ball over ever, and Oakland against one of the few teams not on the top line that can neutralize Benson. If it were Texas-Belmont and Wisconsin-Oakland, both of those upsets would have happened. Why didn’t I pay attention to that before Thursday?)
I've got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left-hand side.
Bradley-Terry rankings for college football and basketball: because there aren't enough computer rankings already.
My bracketing strategy is over 20 years old
Find Syracuse, Arizona and Missouri. Pick whoever their opponent is in first round. Sacrifice an occassional pt or 3 to save yourself the later misery.
Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.
And yet two of those teams have won titles in the past 15 years
and the third has gone on some big upset runs.
In the right matchups, Syracuse is vulnerable, but they do reasonably well most of the time (the only exception I’ve found is when they go on a big BE tourney run and jump up several seed lines as a result). Arizona has never screwed me over too badly (except for that 15-point choke against Illinois in ‘05), and I’ve done well following the opposite of your Missouri rule.
Mine:
1) NEVER pick Vanderbilt.
2) ALWAYS pick Richmond.
3) Kansas can usually be trusted as a 1 seed (though beware if there’s a mid in the 8-9 game). As a 3 or 4? Stay as far away as possible.
4) Trust Pitt only if you’re trying for last place.
5) Beware of Wisconsin and Texas – they may not underachieve all the time but they NEVER overachieve, even when the numbers say they’re better than their seed.
6) Whichever team came out of nowhere to make a big run in the Big East tournament and got a ridiculous seed as a result, that team is going to fail. (This is the first time I can remember this strategy backfiring since at least the Carmelo year.)
7) Missouri is usually good for an upset or two unless they happen to draw an abnormally well-disciplined team.
I've got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left-hand side.
Bradley-Terry rankings for college football and basketball: because there aren't enough computer rankings already.
My wife's coin-flip pool has Richmond and VCU meeting in the Elite 8.
I find her ideas intriguing and wish to subscribe to her newsletter.
That 17-year-old Hokie sitting in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters in 1997 didn't see any of this coming.
I went from like 25th to 8th in my work money pool.
I have won first, 2nd or third the last 4 years. Also, two years ago a woman placed in 1-4 and 6th. None of us coin-flipped. I will not win this year. (thanks ND, thanks.)
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 11:48 AM EDT up reply actions
halfway perfect is not perfect
east and west……….I’m like Arnold Rothstein
southwest/ southeast…………..uhhhhh……..derrrrr………..go kansas?
what a beating
"Well, say, this beats croquet. There's more go about it!"
Alabama's never going to catch Auburn at this rate.
Marc should’ve driven that thing through the Mardi Gras crowds to give his team a chance.
by Board Certified Scrotologist on Mar 21, 2011 11:00 AM EDT reply actions
He's a team player
His mama and grandmama were trying to get him to rat out his cousin, but he was all, “Gotta do my part for the Fulmer Cup!”
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
How does the Stabler vintage compare to this?
“With subtle notes of cigar smoke and titanium hips”
Ceterum autem censeo, Iowa esse delendam.
Ditka always wins.
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
is ditka mini too?
Then bears, 143. Giants 10
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:07 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
Sold in fine Shell Gas Stations all over Atlanta
My only argument is you're stupid.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 21, 2011 12:12 PM EDT up reply actions
You're damn right I bought and drank this.
Did not go for the Chipper Cabernet though.
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Mar 21, 2011 12:13 PM EDT up reply actions
Oh wow
I gotta get my hands on some too.
by Artie_Fufkin on Mar 21, 2011 12:46 PM EDT up reply actions
What you did there,
I sort of halfway see it.
My only argument is you're stupid.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 21, 2011 12:28 PM EDT up reply actions
or whether or not it would move up or down
At least McCann has an excuse. Frenchy had two good eyes.
The twitter
Anfield Asylum, sbnation's very own open zoo for the most dangerous game: Liverpool fans
"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair
Publix in SC
had “Head Ball Coach” wine with Spurrier’s mug plastered on it once. I didn’t buy it nor did I take it’s photo… sadness.
The USC Cocks pay my bills but the LSU Tigers have my heart.
by Anthropologal on Mar 21, 2011 7:02 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm assuming the "top" high school Feldman's referring to is Dunwoody . . .
Whose players may also be described as “gutsy” and “gritty”. Just not “blue collar”.
/Did not play at Dunwoody, as a result actually got to play with a guy named “Bull” who may still be in prison, but was a helluva linebacker.
Don't forget "scrappy"
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
See Disney's new film, "Snow White and the Seven White Athletes"
Gutsy
Gritty
Scrappy…
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
Plays the game the right way
That 17-year-old Hokie sitting in the Greensboro Coliseum rafters in 1997 didn't see any of this coming.
Academic All-Conference
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
WELKAH
Like SBMWV? Try PegPelvisPete! The same great taste of SBMWV w/50% more snark & just 140 characters per serving!
by She Blinded Me With Violence on Mar 21, 2011 11:16 AM EDT up reply actions
Got a heart the size of Tim Russert's.
What? Too soon?
by vineyarddawg on Mar 21, 2011 11:23 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Possession reciever
They hit the road doing 90
Leavin' them steel mills far behind
Ain't no good life down at the Ford plant
Three guitars or a life of crime
by Dawg in Beaumont on Mar 21, 2011 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions
The kind of guy that teammates just *like*
by Owls and Goephs and Craep on Mar 21, 2011 11:20 AM EDT up reply actions
Locker room favorite.
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
Did you know he and the QB have been roommates since the 3rd grade?
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
he hasnt
Lost a game since the 8th grade
/mcelroy’d
/whitennerdy
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:36 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
High Wonderlic score
And did great on his interviews with the scouts
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
Like a kid out there!
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
Would play for free!
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:19 PM EDT up reply actions
Matt Jones?
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 11:52 AM EDT up reply actions
First round material
the Jags thought so.
/sigh
//he was versatile
//white guy being called versatile = not good at anything particular (except coke usage)
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 11:57 AM EDT up reply actions
AWW MAN
I CAN’T BELIEVE WE LET THAT GUY GO TO ARKANSAS HE WAS SO MONEY SPEAKING OF WHICH HE STILL OWES ME TEN GRAND I THINK I MAY HAVE TO EAT HIM
Charlie Sheen?
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:20 PM EDT up reply actions
No that would be /eats 8-ball
//lives with 2 strippers
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:21 PM EDT up reply actions
NEXT LEVEL WARLOCK MANUEVER
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 12:27 PM EDT up reply actions
Since “deceptively fast” is most likely a quick white player, would “deceptively slow” be a slow black player?
They hit the road doing 90
Leavin' them steel mills far behind
Ain't no good life down at the Ford plant
Three guitars or a life of crime
by Dawg in Beaumont on Mar 21, 2011 11:57 AM EDT up reply actions
It's a code word . . .
. . . for Byron Leftwich.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
by DevilGrad on Mar 21, 2011 11:59 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
ouch!
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 11:59 AM EDT up reply actions
Damn, somebody else pickin' on Mershall today.
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 12:00 PM EDT up reply actions
Pet peeve
I saw way too much “expert” analysis back in the day praising Leftwich’s mobility and questioning Roethisberger’s, when anyone who actually watched MAC ball would tell you that the only way you’d reach that conclusion was by looking at nothing but the facebook shots in the media guide.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
they had to carry him
since he broke his leg
/draft him high, he’s gritty
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions
i know
i was going for the post-collegiate pro-team affiliated self deprecation move
/his delivery takes longer than tebows
//if it was a pizza, it’d be free
///Go Jags!
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 12:15 PM EDT up reply actions
Jags First Round pick
man we are awesome at picking QBs who will win a super bowl with another team after leaving ours!
/brunell’d
//leftwich’d
///googles beurlein
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 12:01 PM EDT up reply actions
gym rat
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:13 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
cody hawkins
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:17 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
Like having another coach on the field.
by Dr. Norris Camacho on Mar 21, 2011 11:46 AM EDT up reply actions
good skill set
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:50 AM EDT up reply actions
played minor league baseball
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:21 PM EDT up reply actions
glue guy
If you win all your fights, you're pickin em
by imhugeinjapan on Mar 21, 2011 1:25 PM EDT up reply actions
The opposite of "long and athletic"
Real sports nut, huh?
by Awesome Bill from Dawsonville on Mar 21, 2011 10:39 PM EDT up reply actions
The View Ladies as football players...
GO!
They hit the road doing 90
Leavin' them steel mills far behind
Ain't no good life down at the Ford plant
Three guitars or a life of crime
by Dawg in Beaumont on Mar 21, 2011 11:14 AM EDT reply actions
elizabeth hasselbeck
Qb – opens her mouth and says unintelligent things like “we’ll take the ball and we’re gonna score”
/fail
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:16 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
In a perfect world, they would be the starting defense for the 1970 Marshall Thundering Herd.
Ceterum autem censeo, Iowa esse delendam.
by Spartan D on Mar 21, 2011 11:17 AM EDT up reply actions 27 recs
Dude, that's cold.
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions
boy this thread went down
In a flaming wreckage really quickly….
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:19 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions 1 recs
cold as ice
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 11:20 AM EDT up reply actions
Too soon!
But does that mean Matthew McConaughey would be the new host? Because that might rule a little bit.
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
the view... of my abs!
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:23 PM EDT up reply actions
AWRIGHT AWRIGHT AWRIIIIIGHT
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Mar 21, 2011 12:32 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm probably going to hell, but this gets a rec from me
They hit the road doing 90
Leavin' them steel mills far behind
Ain't no good life down at the Ford plant
Three guitars or a life of crime
by Dawg in Beaumont on Mar 21, 2011 11:22 AM EDT up reply actions
COOOOLLLLDDD BLOOOOOODDDDEDDDD
"I'm colonel cool! And I'm the captain on this rocket to the stars!"
by psuphiman80 on Mar 21, 2011 11:22 AM EDT up reply actions
Oh c'mon people...
….Like none of you has ever dreamed about The View ladies being extinguished
Ceterum autem censeo, Iowa esse delendam.
no love for the view 2.0 on cbs
Starring sharon osbourne and leah remini, its called “cackling hens” or something along those lines.
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:27 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
huh? really?
I thought the SNL skit a week or two ago was completely fictitious. They really have thier own show now?
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 11:28 AM EDT up reply actions
its with a heavy heart
I confirm that it is an actual show
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:30 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
I support this.
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 11:44 AM EDT up reply actions
HEEEEEY
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 11:45 AM EDT up reply actions
i think that they are referring to the current and future seasons
some people don’t appreciate the new humor and in 10 years they’ll look back and realize it was funny and clamor for the good ole days.
oh well. i agree it’s hit or miss, but i don’t have any recorded college football to watch on sunday mornings, so SNL it is…
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 11:53 AM EDT up reply actions
They have some good stuff
But they always bring back uninspiring/unfunny characters too often, and those characters seem to get the longest skits (see all of Kristen Wiig’s characters)
Proud member of the Fax Girl fan club.
by billycthulhu on Mar 21, 2011 12:41 PM EDT up reply actions
if you don't find Stephon funny
You need more interesting friends
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 12:43 PM EDT up reply actions
Can't say that I agree with this statement
but it still gets a rec for sheer spite and hustle.
by Mango Stasi on Mar 21, 2011 11:24 AM EDT up reply actions
Now you've done it
Trust my experience on this when I tell you that “disrespecting the crash” is the surest way in hell to bring about a Herdiban invasion — albeit consisting of half-wits who weren’t even born when that plane went down and thought it was okay when Bob Pruett analogized the “adversity” facing Marshall after its (most recent) probation to the crash.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
Obvious troll is obvious.
Real sports nut, huh?
by Awesome Bill from Dawsonville on Mar 21, 2011 10:44 PM EDT up reply actions
"...a man he only knew by the nickname 'Bull'..."
you mean this guy?
by CincySooner on Mar 21, 2011 11:22 AM EDT reply actions 4 recs
somewhere in heaven
Chain smoking bailiff Roz, nods approvingly
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:25 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
Done
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
by ChemE93 on Mar 21, 2011 11:46 AM EDT up reply actions 5 recs
rection!
It works on both levels
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:48 AM EDT up reply actions
Don't foget about her work on "Fall Guy"
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 11:52 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I am familiar
with her body of work.
Don’t forget Card Sharks.
"Notre Dame is ascared of Auburn." - unknown
hellooooooooooooooooooooo nurse!
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 11:54 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Animaniacs gets a rec
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 11:55 AM EDT up reply actions
12-year-old Import would like to stand up and salute that
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Mar 21, 2011 12:35 PM EDT up reply actions
Roz was played by Marsha Warfield
who is not the same as Selma, the chain smoking bailiff. The differences between them is subtle, though.
The biological purpose of pain is to prevent the recurrence of stupidity.
Yeah, I lol'ed on that too
Other than Selma Diamond being white, about 80 and 4 foot 6 tall, her and Marsha Warfield were indistinguishable.
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 12:18 PM EDT up reply actions
Then why the hell are you reading?!
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
Doing things the 'Right Way"
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 11:31 AM EDT up reply actions
Because it worked out so well for Mr. Crxxm....
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
[thatsthejoke.jpg]
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 11:42 AM EDT up reply actions
/reads wrong cases
//goes to wrong class
Transmogrified up in this piece!
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Mar 21, 2011 11:34 AM EDT up reply actions
"On a 3-2 decision..."
by Owls and Goephs and Craep on Mar 21, 2011 11:34 AM EDT up reply actions 8 recs
Looka them earz!
theyre lahk jug handles!
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 1:29 PM EDT up reply actions
Hadley v. Baxendale says what up?
Ah, ah, ah, a pirate first with a lawyer's wasted education, and himself bound by the fiendish ties of a legal disputation.
To spice things up, create private names for each case.
“Dick Slapper v. Roger the Rapist”
“Fuck v. Shit”
“Yick Wo v. Hopkins”
/12yo
by Owls and Goephs and Craep on Mar 21, 2011 11:24 AM EDT up reply actions
Plz to cut down facts a bit?
LOL NO SIR F U 37 PAGES OF FACTS.
Transmogrified up in this piece!
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Mar 21, 2011 11:27 AM EDT up reply actions
Wah wah, my note (law journal thesis for the uninitiated) is due in 3 hours and I'm nowhere near done
But come tomorrow I’ll come a-bitchin like you too
The list is long, but distinguished.
Bragging while I have the chance
I pretty much need to be letter-perfect to win now (and need either Butler or Wisconsin to win their region to take down my money pool), so I want to enjoy this moment of glory. Sean Miller, thank you for coming through for a fellow Pittsburgher. Mike Brey, Jim Boeheim and Jamie Dixon can all go to hell.
I'm basking in the warm glow of leading both my money pools
Until Thursday, when I plummet from the pedestal thanks to Notre Dame.
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
That's why I'm reveling now
I’ve tried laying low and it doesn’t work, so instead I’m going the Rex Ryan path and instead will seek every second of glory possible before it all goes wrong and Ohio State shoots 3-30 from 3 and murders my bracket.
THISTHISTHIS
Though I’m still top of my group. Thank you Duke and Carolina. Keep winning. KTHXBYE
The twitter
Anfield Asylum, sbnation's very own open zoo for the most dangerous game: Liverpool fans
"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair
as a husker
I also have to say fuck Steve Pdersen (pitt AD) with a rusty auger. Fuck that guy with gusto and while you’re at it, fuck clemson
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 11:32 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
Anyone seen my fiance this morning?
He’s, uh, kinda hard to see, considering he’s nonexistent, but I worry he may have done something drastic after ____ lost last night.
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
Have you tried looking upstairs at his house?
by Torgo's Executive Powder on Mar 21, 2011 11:35 AM EDT up reply actions 10 recs
M. C. Escher will get a rec from me
My advice to the youth of America can best be expressed in the words of Robert A. Heinlein, "Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again."
by MtnEer_in_SC on Mar 21, 2011 11:36 AM EDT up reply actions
Not surprisingly, my boss is in a right rage over Purdue
I think he’s spent most of the morning screaming about Painter, the refs, Hummel’s knee, bad coaching, etc.
Painter did get outcoached in that game, badly.
At some point, you gotta start switching on screens, dude.
Ceterum autem censeo, Iowa esse delendam.
Did he also wildly overenunciate?
/can’t stand the camera shots of painter for that reason
by Owls and Goephs and Craep on Mar 21, 2011 11:38 AM EDT up reply actions
Could he have accepted his own fate at this point?
Or is he pulling a Greyshirted wake up at 3pm from hangover type of day?
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:04 PM EDT up reply actions
he's probably hanging out with lloyd carr in petsmart.
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm proud and astonished.
I’m the only one in my “office” today. I’m refusing to turn on lights and accept that it’s Monday.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:13 PM EDT up reply actions
Oh good, you're alive.
Your fiance was super worried.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 7:33 PM EDT up reply actions
I can't say that I blame you or would not have been in that position if I were you.
Although I am glad you have rejoined the living.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 7:42 PM EDT up reply actions
On a completely unrelated note to any of this, I just felt the need to share this picture library
SFW and all that good stuff. Educational too!
Also, TR for Digital Viking?
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 11:46 AM EDT reply actions
He's already been honored, if I recall correctly.
"What Would Jesus Do? You're damn right he'd do a wheelie" ~ Daniel Tosh
Clap along fans
What is it about every audience outside of N America that claps/chants along with every rock song? I love the song “Jailbreak”, but it doesn’t seem to have a “clap your hands to the beat” vibe to it, but 5 seconds in, those Aussies are clapping along. Are rock fans just rhythmically challenged in the States or what?
Whatever it is, I do love Phil Lynott rocking the “this bass is like a WEAPON” move right off the bat. Or maybe he was doing that to steady himself b/c he was so hammered on Jameson’s. Either way, nice.
Lets see them clap along to this
Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.
see your 11:4
and raise you 13:4 (at least at first)
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
God Bless "Tin Lizzy"
Most underrated rock band in history.
Love is the coal that makes this train roll
by justanotherbuckeye on Mar 21, 2011 1:26 PM EDT up reply actions
Just finished reading this morning's Austin American-Statesman
44 paragraphs of coverage of the Texas-Arizona game last night, 23 of which are about the refs.
ALL THE BUTTHURT?
ALL. THE. BUTTHURT.
NEXT LEVEL BUTTHURT MANEUVER
Much easier to ignore the questionable quality of things that are covered in cheese.
hello, my name is dr heimliech, and i've just invented a maneuver.
would you like to see it? here, first swallow this golf ball.
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:27 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
A FIST! A HAND! HOOCHA HOOCHA HOOCHA...lobster.
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Mar 21, 2011 12:36 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
well remembered
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:40 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm sure they mentioned
How J’Covan Brown was getting unbelievably ticky tack calls for the duration of the second half, meaning the refs put Texas in position to win that game. OH THEY DIDN’T?
by Peter Gray on Mar 21, 2011 12:12 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I'm not saying the calls at the end of the game were kind of screwy
But Texas both lived AND died by the refs yesterday. Rick Barnes frowny face goes here.
I thought Kerr was about to jump over the scorer's table
and physically FORCE Arizona’s D to stop jumping the screens.
Yeah he was a "little" biased, but not to the point of annoyance
To be honest, I can’t expect an announcer who is an alum of a school to not be biased. It’s more the network’s responsibility to minimize guys calling their schools’ games.
Ceterum autem censeo, Iowa esse delendam.
Craig James should be prevented from calling ANYONE's school's games
by Peter Gray on Mar 21, 2011 12:24 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Just elect him to Texas government.
That should do the trick!
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:25 PM EDT up reply actions
damn! I forgot to end with /would neverevereverever vote for craig james
/eats towel
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:30 PM EDT up reply actions
/eats votes
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Mar 21, 2011 12:37 PM EDT up reply actions
/eats Craig James
Tastes like $100 bills.
My only argument is you're stupid.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 21, 2011 1:55 PM EDT up reply actions
People get the government they deserve.
Texas deserves Craig James.
(Only if it’s state gubmint, natch – don’t want him in Congress.)
by Albino Tornado on Mar 21, 2011 12:52 PM EDT up reply actions
My wife likes hearing him call games
though she concedes his best contributions could be replaced by a sound board with buttons marked “woo,” woo hoo," “woo hoo hoo,” “heeee,” and “wee hee hee, wooo!”
Even watching as a Longhorn, I had no problem with it
His loyalty showed, but it’s full disclosure loyalty and he still did a good job breaking down the game.
Makes sense to me
After all, reporting that Rick Barnes got outcoached is no longer news-worthy.
Et Universitatis Ohioensis delenda est!
Simmons said it in his podcast last week
“Has anyone ever regretted betting against Rick Barnes?” That was the sole reason I went with Arizona. Fate smiled upon me…and then paid me back. Fucking Syracuse.
Simmons hatred for Barnes
is tied solely to his BUTTHURT over his mancrush Kevin Durant not going further in the tourney.
As a survivor of the Tom Penders era
I will never, ever have a problem with Rick Barnes coaching the Longhorns.
He represents the University with class, runs his program the right way, and coaches his ass off on defense.
There may be 5 guys in the country I’d rather have. And we’re not getting any of them.
#Barnes4Life
by lhb98 on Mar 21, 2011 12:46 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I'll rec that for troof
With a little extra RAEG at the fact that considering the talent he brings in, he could stand to win the conference once in a while.
WOOOOOOO BMW – that’s when I was there.
by Burrito Electrico on Mar 21, 2011 2:04 PM EDT up reply actions
that is definitely Kenny Power's father
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 2:08 PM EDT up reply actions
KRAP
Powers’, too.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I'm not stupid. I just make a lot of bad decisions.
by CoastalCowbell on Mar 21, 2011 2:09 PM EDT up reply actions
Fair enough
I can understand why Barnes’ foibles/weaknesses would be tolerable when compared to Penders.
I give Penders some credit
In a shrewd business move his last couple of years at Texas, he kept his skin an interesting shade of off-burnt orange.
by Burrito Electrico on Mar 21, 2011 2:56 PM EDT up reply actions
Rick Barnes is 20-19 all time in the NCAA tournament
This is not a joke.
That is staggeringly atrocious.
The list is long, but distinguished.
But there's the difference
Before Barnes, the most talented player to ever come to UT was Sidney freakin’ Moncrief.
We were falling all over ourselves at the thought of Lance Blanks and Travis Mays, both of whom barely got a cup of coffee in the NBA.
Barnes has turned UT into a legitimate year-in, year-out destination for talent. Sometimes he falls short in the tournament, but it’s a trade I’m happy to make.
And he got the student section out of the freaking mezzanine
…and behind the baskets. AFTER I GRADUATED
/weeps
by Burrito Electrico on Mar 21, 2011 3:12 PM EDT up reply actions
I think that's more a testament to the awfulness of your prior coaches than the accomplishments of your current one
There’s a lot of basketball talent in Tejas and Barnes has no small budget to work with. It boggles my mind that Texas hasn’t been at least as good as it is now for ages.
The list is long, but distinguished.
Moncrief went to Arkansas.
"That chick was like, the Pele of anal."
by Bob Genghiskhan on Mar 21, 2011 6:50 PM EDT up reply actions
best thing he's ever done
was threaten to bitch slap that old sot dean smith
"Well, say, this beats croquet. There's more go about it!"
Were they actual paragraphs?
Or perhaps Galloway-style one-liners?
Perhaps they emntioned that the ref refused a legal timeout?
Or that Brown was fouled twice on the way to the basket?
I could go on.
But that pretty much sums it up, right?
by Burrito Electrico on Mar 21, 2011 1:46 PM EDT up reply actions
Was talking about it with one of the guys at work.
Our conclusion: “Yeah, the 5-second count was a little quick. But let’s face it, they’d have just gotten called for another one after the second timeout.”
The order of the universe dictated that ending, because Rick Barnes loses basketball games.
I've got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left-hand side.
Bradley-Terry rankings for college football and basketball: because there aren't enough computer rankings already.
/offer only valid in March
I've got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left-hand side.
Bradley-Terry rankings for college football and basketball: because there aren't enough computer rankings already.
Hey it's after 11 here, shouldn't there be sports or something on tv right now?
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
NO SPORTS FOR YOU
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 12:19 PM EDT up reply actions
HISS
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:20 PM EDT up reply actions
/meme pops out of chest, kills half of commentariat
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:30 PM EDT up reply actions
/meme loves meme some meme
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:33 PM EDT up reply actions
I think the offseason is starting to get to the commentariat
These threads are getting more bizarre as time goes on.
Soon, soon there will be football, precious…
"December-April of 2010 is basically just a blur to me, filled with lots of boobs and passing out." - stanzi's ex-girlfriend
by The Ghost of John Hannah on Mar 21, 2011 12:32 PM EDT up reply actions
I feel like a Cylon
looking at a certain mailing list from 1994…
All of this has happened before…
"Well, if that ain't a show, I'll kiss your ass." - Gov. Jim Folsom Sr. (D-AL), 1948-52
by VandyImport on Mar 21, 2011 12:38 PM EDT up reply actions
/airlocks Cylon
Live to fly!
Go Gators!
by Specter177 on Mar 21, 2011 1:34 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
/falls in love with a Cylon
//Oh, fuck, I AM a Cylon!
"Wer viel Bier trinkt, schläft gut. Wer gut schläft, sündigt nicht. Und wer nicht sündigt, kommt in den Himmel!" Martin Luther
/sues identity crisis
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 4:20 PM EDT up reply actions
Aw, fuck, I just got spoil'd
Maybe, anyway. I was gonna possibly perhaps someday maybe try to start watching that show.
I love green because money be green.
Everyone is a cylon
even you. You’re definitely a cylon.
Weoejuwejhdjwe!
Twitter
by Chekhov's Spread Gun Option on Mar 21, 2011 5:35 PM EDT up reply actions
You know, I thought about that before posting.
But figured, if you haven’t started by now, your chances of getting to the end without someone ruining it for you were nil anyway.
"Wer viel Bier trinkt, schläft gut. Wer gut schläft, sündigt nicht. Und wer nicht sündigt, kommt in den Himmel!" Martin Luther
me too
just got to the second season. OH WELL. I was thankful enough to have just finished season 4 of Dexter a few months ago and not have it spoiled, so I guess I had it coming.
Proud member of the Fax Girl fan club.
by billycthulhu on Mar 21, 2011 7:42 PM EDT up reply actions
Lurker since 2006.
First post. But I’m in a terrible mood this morning.
Fuck Clemson. Seriously, fuck them. I hate everything about that school.
by ASManess on Mar 21, 2011 12:32 PM EDT reply actions 9 recs
Show us on the doll where Clemson hurt you
Strong first post.
by lhb98 on Mar 21, 2011 12:33 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
BIRTH IN HATRED IS STRONG BIRTH
by Owls and Goephs and Craep on Mar 21, 2011 12:34 PM EDT up reply actions
but should the baptism be in blood, gin, or brown likker?
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:35 PM EDT up reply actions
Fire?
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 12:35 PM EDT up reply actions
WELCOME, BROTHER.
Like SBMWV? Try PegPelvisPete! The same great taste of SBMWV w/50% more snark & just 140 characters per serving!
by She Blinded Me With Violence on Mar 21, 2011 12:38 PM EDT up reply actions
GOOD....GOOD......
" Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. "
by alex henery's foot on Mar 21, 2011 10:16 PM EDT up reply actions
and aprapos of nothing but WINNING
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:44 PM EDT reply actions 5 recs
found on 11 Warriors
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:44 PM EDT up reply actions
wut?
11 Warriors stealin stuff from 4chan….
...flyin ain't nothin, that's just fallin with style...
by Boozy McHound on Mar 21, 2011 12:47 PM EDT up reply actions
should have said 'found link to this of 11W"
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 12:49 PM EDT up reply actions
I hate everything.
My day was bad enough, waking up after that brutalization ND took last night. Then at lunch I decide to check twitter and…. I hate everything. I really do. Someone post the FUUUUUUUU rage-face for me please.
for you
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 1:12 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
No more Rebecca Black...why are these memories coming back to me?
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
EDSBS is presumably anti-Rebecca Black
since, if everyday WERE Saturday, that snot-nosed bitch would be out of a job.
“Want to get down on Friday? Too bad, not in this dimension. I know you know where we are – we’re the day after Friday, and the day after us is Sunday.”
"I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon. Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words — imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists."
AND SUNDAY COMES AFTERWARDS
NO BITCH, THIS COMES AFTERWARDS:
And here's a lighthouse keeper being beheaded by a laser beam!
by UMBAI on Mar 21, 2011 1:46 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
It's so orange and pretty.
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 1:47 PM EDT up reply actions
put those memories in the back seat
/sets memories on fire
And, in the end, there were, perhaps, limits to how much he could let himself change. - Lucien.
by Philander Chase's Sweatervest on Mar 21, 2011 3:07 PM EDT up reply actions
So 800 comments
and nobody noted that Joel McHale actually played TE at Washington? When they were good?
The twitter
Anfield Asylum, sbnation's very own open zoo for the most dangerous game: Liverpool fans
"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair
Wasn't he, like, backup to the backup of the backup?
I remember him talking about it on Carolla’s podcast.
I love green because money be green.
Late in the day, slim chance it'll get answered, gonna ask anyway
I’ve been listening to a lot of hip-hop and indie rock lately. I want some teeth-shattering hard rock shit. Like something in the tradition of Songs for the Deaf or Relationship of Command. Anything new out that’s any good?
I love green because money be green.
OK, be honest
How many of the commentariat immediately tried to think of ways to RickRoll this?
Let's goooooooooo, Mountaineeeeeeeeers!
by An 'eer with a beer on Mar 21, 2011 8:07 PM EDT up reply actions
I almost went with that terrible Rebecca Black song
"I think so, Brain, but how are we going to get the bacon flavoring into the pencils?"
"My favorite play is Dave. It involves a long pull, deep penetration, and pure power." -Jim Tressel
Speaking of
I have tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic. And the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Tallulah Bankhead
by Chloe Denmark on Mar 21, 2011 8:21 PM EDT up reply actions
YES
The USC Cocks pay my bills but the LSU Tigers have my heart.
by Anthropologal on Mar 22, 2011 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions
Perish the thought
Though I’ve learned to be judicious with link-clicking.
I love green because money be green.
dsfdre
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