CLIFFHANGERS WITH TURNER GILL

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Welcome to the Price Is Right. When we left for commercial, we were just getting to know our next contestant. Your name, please?

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Turner, sir.

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Of course it is! Why, what do you do for a living, Turner?

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I was--am a football coach.

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That was--is STUPENDOUS, Turner. Are you ready to play Cliffhangers today?

 

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Ready, but Bob, I have to warn you: do to an obscure clause in my contract, I can only use the rankings of my defense from 2011 as guesses in numerical games of chance.

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You'll be fine. Oddly enough, our items today are just defensive categories and rankings from this year's NCAA Football Stats.

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Fancy that.

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No one likes a wiseass, Turner. Okay, first number: opponent's third down performance. Greater or less than 110?

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Gotta go with less. My boys had their ups and downs, but there are 120 schools in FBS football, Bob.

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We'll see if you're right! For the climber's sake, I hope you are!

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There he goes...

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...and oh my...

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...oh, that's too bad.


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Bob, I'd really like another chance.

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That's the spirit. Let's try rushing TDs allowed, then!

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Or maybe passing TDS!

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Yards per rush defended? How about yards per pass defended?

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Goodness, Turner. Opponent pass completion? Sacks per game? Tackles for loss? Opponent pass completion?

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I'm sorry, Turner, but this doesn't seem to be your game.

 

 

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It's a strange contract. Buyout's nice, too. Are you hiring?

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Nope! Haven't worked here since 2007.

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Awwww.

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