In which we reward the highlights and lesser luminaries of Week 1. Play along in the comments. Additional overlarge images of classroom stickers welcome. This is a fluffy, organic, highly subjective process of love and contempt.
SUPERSTAR! Kellen Moore, who, with two minutes remaining in last night's Labor Day tilt, gave us one more reason to remain utterly contemptuous of Virginia Tech. We can never stockpile enough of these.
IMPROVING! North Dakota State, who's clearly ready to take one of the vacating spots in the Big 12 North.
YOU TRIED! MTSU, for leading Minnesota into the fourth quarter and doing it without the excellent Dwight Dasher and his less-excellent gambling problem.
HAND UP! Les Miles, who is very eager to let you all know that while his offense, defense, and standings in the polls remain suspect, he is as adept as ever at pitching his players beneath fast-moving buses.
TAKE TURNS! Oklahoma, for graciously allowing Utah State to come within a touchdown of beating a top-ten team and thereby taste a soupcon of football glory.
SIT STILL! Kendall Hunter of Oklahoma State did, for most of the 'Pokes-Wazzu game. When he was standing up, he notched 257 yards on just 21 carries.
CREATIVE! Presbyterian's rooskie against Wake Forest, because if you're going to lose 53-13, you best do it in style.
BUSY BEE! Kenjon Barner of Oregon, who amassed 17 carries, 147 yards, and four touchdowns against New Mexico, and who will be VERY busy next week, heading to face a Tennessee team that has replaced approximately twenty-seven starters on the line.
GOOD HELPER! Jeremiah Masoli, cleared by the NCAA just in time to ... well, you know. The nine billionty shrieky emails and comments we had to wade through on his behalf last week are now all worth it.
GRAPE JOB! Kiffykins, for goofing around with all those post-touchdown shenanigans to distract us from the fact that he's not all that good in school. "Lane, did you do your defensive homework?" "No, Miss Russell ... but HERE'S ANOTHER TWO-POINT CONVERSION!"