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Around SBN: Tim Wakefield Retires

THE CURIOUS INDEX, 9/1/2010

RECOGNIZE OUR GLOVE GAME SON: 

Screen_shot_2010-09-01_at_10

The Nike Pro Combat Unis debuted this morning, and it proved again that Michael Irvin should be invited to every event ever for the remainder of his life, since he lovingly caressed the model's thighs in highlighting the fit of the pant (singular), openly lobbied for the University of Miami during the presentation and then joked about getting the NCAA up their ass while doing it, and then patted Fowler on the ass on the way out. Chuck Csuri also destroyed it by being a crusty old bastard who reminded you how we didn't live through the depression and the Battle of the Bulge, and it's all summarized here for your reading pleasure because WHO DOESN'T LOVE FASHION?

ANGRY FISTS (WITH RED CUP IN HAND): Ole Miss fans access their inner anger dog this morning in the wake of Jeremiah Masoli being told he could not immediately play at the University of Mississippi in 2010.  Mmm, layer cake: 

1. Delicious frosting of laughing at Houston Nutt. Really the thinnest layer of this story, but the one we're vengefully licking off our fingers. 

2. Fluffy yellow cake of NCAA's senseless transfer rules, which are arbitrarily enforced and nonsensically constructed. 

3. Cardboard cake platter which we accidentally ate in all the frenzy. Upside: fiber! 

MMMMM KILLING TIME EXQUISITELY: The SBNation Pac-10 preview is huge, and with a handy pop-up spreadsheet probably more than enough to kill a good thirty minutes of productive office time. If potentially productive minutes were tiny little animate soldiers, your office is one day away from being completely covered an inch-thick layer of brave warriors who lay down their lives so that you could read about football on the job. Do not take their sacrifice for granted. 

LOLBOB.  Bob Stoops nonsequitur, she goes with everything: 

Lolbob2_medium

DUDE PLEASE DON'T SIGN THAT. Fresno State and Nevada really, really don't want BYU to hurry into anything with the WAC, and are playing the part of everyone watching the last guy on the black jack table standing on 14 looking to hit with a dealer 5 showing. 

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WVU Pro-Combat 2010 uni

to be worn in the Backyard Brawl against Pitt.

We’re the road team this year.

"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke

by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 1, 2010 12:13 PM EDT reply actions  

That is truly unfortunate stallion placement on the Boise State pants.

"Dodger fans aren’t happy when foul balls get into their section, because it interferes with their playing with the beachball"- Mike Krukow

by 49er16 on Sep 1, 2010 12:13 PM EDT reply actions  

Congratulations on your football independence, BYU! Let's go get some beers to celebrate!

Oh. Never mind.

How about a tattoo that says “INDY LIFE 4EVA?” No?

Fine. We’ll just do a very polite home-and-home, then. You’re no fun.

Brian Kelly says no commercial interruption.

by Ancient Chinese Secret on Sep 1, 2010 12:16 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Mormons and fun

are never seen together in the same sentence, unless a NOT is present.

"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke

by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 1, 2010 12:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

They like to blow shit up

which is fun.

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 12:31 PM EDT up reply actions  

Reminds me . . .

. . . of the old LaVell Edwards quote about BYU’s travel to bowl games: “Our fans come to town with a copy of the Ten Commandments and a twenty dollar bill and have a reputation for not breaking either.”

by DevilGrad on Sep 1, 2010 1:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

They can’t even drink a celebratory soda. At least not a soda with caffeine.

"Dodger fans aren’t happy when foul balls get into their section, because it interferes with their playing with the beachball"- Mike Krukow

by 49er16 on Sep 1, 2010 12:34 PM EDT up reply actions  

that is only the strict ones

I pound regular Dr. Pepper and Coke. Yes I am a rebel!

Mountain West Connection The best site for MWC sports!

by Jeremy Mauss on Sep 1, 2010 2:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

meh...

the wounds have scarred over nicely.

by CincySooner on Sep 2, 2010 12:11 AM EDT up reply actions  

THE TCU HORNED FROGS

Ready to do battle in a post-apocalyptic nuclear winter, motherfuckers. /inscrutable Texas school hand gesture

by The Ghost of Jay Cutler on Sep 1, 2010 12:29 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

That's missing an MS Paint fart cloud and noise.

Because college football is too important to be left to the professionals.

by Spencer Hall on Sep 1, 2010 12:30 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

My friend who went to Ole Miss calls Georgia "the red-headed step child of the SEC"

Irony, like a good Malbec, is best savored slowly (not sure what this proves, btw, other than that Ole Miss fans possess a lot of previously unfocused rage- they hate everyone in the SEC, mostly because they beat them so rarely).

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 12:26 PM EDT reply actions  

If the team that hasn't had . . .

a losing conference record since the Clinton administration is the RHSC, I’d love to know what previously unuttered expletive this friend applies to Mississippi State.

by MaconDawg on Sep 1, 2010 1:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

I don't agree with the above statement, I'm just passing it on

As for Mississippi state, let’s just say what he said isn’t obscene, but it’s highly objectionable

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 1:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Knocked-up meth-head daughter?

"I think so, Brain, but how are we going to get the bacon flavoring into the pencils?"

by MikeLew on Sep 1, 2010 2:26 PM EDT up reply actions  

Nah

more like the kid in tha back of the class with shitty clothes that unexpectedly beats up one (sometimes two!) of the other richer, better dressed, more athletic kids in class every year.

"Nice coat! Who shot the couch?"

by CoastalCowbell on Sep 1, 2010 2:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

those guys are usually wrestlers

and that might be too high a qualification. You want to know the feeling of putting your hand in a buzzsaw without as much permanent damage? Screw with a wrestler one too many times.

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 2:50 PM EDT up reply actions  

John Voss from Empire Falls

"It’s not Disneyland, people. Get the hell out of the way." NYC Firefighter

by jokastrength on Sep 1, 2010 2:52 PM EDT up reply actions  

An addendum:

We’re mostly crusty, white curmudgeons who don’t know enough about football to even name all 12 members of the SEC. That’s how I’d classify our fan base, but, hey, what do I know. I’m sure your friend from Buckhead is a fine individual.

by The Ghost of Jay Cutler on Sep 1, 2010 2:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

He's all right

He’s actually not a big fan of Atlanta (though Atlanta is well represented in his particular fraternity), which plays into his feelings

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 2:20 PM EDT up reply actions  

I'm more-or-less over yesterday's rage.

I’m still annoyed and feel a bit screwed, but HOLY HELL DID WE FORGET THAT FOOTBALL STARTS TOMORROW?!

It’s like hearing that your crazy geriatric uncle died two days before an awesome Christmas. Sucks about your uncle and all, but you knew he was kicking the bucket sooner rather than later, and you really never grew attached to him. And then you get an N64 with Goldeneye and an extra controller a couple days later, making everything in the world right again. Almost.

by The Ghost of Jay Cutler on Sep 1, 2010 12:27 PM EDT reply actions  

Apparently

it’s already Thursday in some parts of the world…can I has football now?

by Pariahwulfen on Sep 1, 2010 12:32 PM EDT up reply actions  

UNC needs to "shadow" suspend the rest of their D-line

Nobody knows who’s going to play on Thursday, but the administration is out for blood.

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 12:42 PM EDT up reply actions  

TV schedules

I looked at the ESPN schedule for the week, and their stupid new ESPN3.com label makes it hard to find which games are on real 20th century television. Anyone have another favorite site they use to check TV schedules?

by Tim James on Sep 1, 2010 12:51 PM EDT reply actions  

For those of us who have TWC (and therefore don't have ESPN3, and might not have ESPN or ABC at all in a week or so)

this is their listing site:
http://sports.espn.go.com/espntv/espnGuide

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 12:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

If I come home from work

and I have no access to football, then AT&T will be getting a new household.

by Pariahwulfen on Sep 1, 2010 1:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

the last time this happened

The FCC had to get involved, and even then it required a court order. This is going to suck…

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 1:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

Here's the announcers and schedule

http://the506.com/sports/?p=575

"Dodger fans aren’t happy when foul balls get into their section, because it interferes with their playing with the beachball"- Mike Krukow

by 49er16 on Sep 1, 2010 1:03 PM EDT up reply actions  

Dammit

I really wanted the Mike Patrick/Craig James announcing team to cover this one:

September 5:
SMU @ Texas Tech, 3:30
ESPN: Mark Jones, Bob Davie, Holly Rowe

by dmoney350z on Sep 1, 2010 2:32 PM EDT up reply actions  

I also like

lsufootball.net

not drunk, just overserved

by Gen. Stoopnagle on Sep 1, 2010 1:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

Side note...

The Big Ten is going to announce it’s divisional split tonite on the BTN at 7PM.

I’ve heard a rumor (from a decent source) that they are going with geographical split.

I’ll b’lee it went I see it.

It doesn’t matter how many football games the SEC wins. We will always look down on you.

by devidee33 on Sep 1, 2010 1:12 PM EDT reply actions  

Nevermind...

Looks like these are the divisions…

Division 1

Michigan
Nebraska
Iowa
Michigan State
Minnesota
Northwestern

Division 2

Ohio State
Penn State
Wisconsin
Purdue
Indiana
Illinois

Fuck me in the ass with a butterless corncob.

There’s a rumor floating around that the game will remain the last week of the season.

So you’re telling me there’s a chance…

It doesn’t matter how many football games the SEC wins. We will always look down on you.

by devidee33 on Sep 1, 2010 2:05 PM EDT up reply actions  

The way that lines up

they had to make sure they kept that Indiana-Minnesota rivalry alive.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

Also

if that is remotely lined up accurately, Wisconsin’s rival is Iowa not Minnesota, killing the longest continuous rivalry. Not fuckin likely is my thinking.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:07 PM EDT up reply actions  

Also also

flip Wisconsin and Iowa and I might believe it.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:08 PM EDT up reply actions  

Rumors I've seen pretty much agree with the above listed

Except flip Minnesota and Illinois

Division 1
Michigan
Michigan State
Iowa
Nebraska
Illinois
Northwestern

Division 2
Ohio State
Penn State
Wisconsin
Minnesota
Purdue
Indiana

Wisconsin and Iowa are protected rivalry. Link

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 2:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

That makes much more sense.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah, looks like they basically went with a geographic split

and swapped Wisconsin and Minnesota with Michigan and Michigan State.

I’m okay with it. I would have loved it if Wisconsin were to play NU every year and avoided OSU as much as possible [this has more to do with my experiences with both fan bases, than the play on the field] but not really that big of a deal.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 2:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

What fucking geography class did you take?

This is fucking gerrymandering pure and simple. Ageographic split would be like this:

East –
tOSU
PSU
Michigan
Michigan St
Indiana
Purdue

West
Northwestern
Illinois
Wisconsin
Minnesota
Iowa
Nebraska

by Crabapple Buck on Sep 1, 2010 3:08 PM EDT up reply actions  

if the above is true

(not yours, but the gerrymandered split), then we can pretty much pencil in NU-OSU for the BTCG about every year (think Alabama Florida in the early-mid 90s and the latter aughts).

"Orators are most vehement when their cause is weak" Marcus Tullius Cicero

by Stuck in the Plains on Sep 1, 2010 3:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

Pretty much... Wisconsin and Iowa should be able to say something about it

especially when they catch OSU and or Nebraska at home.

But in years when UW has to go to the Shoe or Iowa has to go to Memorial, the two teams that sport Scarlett will be heavy favorites

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

I would be much more concerned about Iowa

than this UW team; success under Bielema has been rather spotty against top 25 squads.

"Orators are most vehement when their cause is weak" Marcus Tullius Cicero

by Stuck in the Plains on Sep 1, 2010 3:26 PM EDT up reply actions  

Agreed

Bielema has all but used up his “Alvarez hand picked me” good will in Madison. He has the best team he’s had since his first year, so we’ll see what he can do with it. Although with Alvarez as the AD a change is not likely, at least not any time soon.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:31 PM EDT up reply actions  

I take back my other apology

Like I said, then when with a Geographic split then swapped Michigan and Michigan State to the West and Wisconsin and Minnesota to the East.

Or am I missing something

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:22 PM EDT up reply actions  

Even in the geographic split you listed

Illinois and Northwestern are in the West. I didn’t say that Wisconsin and Minnesota belonged in the East. I said they started with what would be East, then took out Michigan and Michigan State and put in Wisconsin and Minnesota.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 4:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

ESPN is reporting the devidee33 version

Also known as “screw Wisconsin”.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 3:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

Didn't finish my first sentence

Should read either they are going to kill Iowa-Wisconsin or the longest continuously played rivalry in D1A

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:42 PM EDT up reply actions  

Even the ACC didnt screw anyone that bad

UNC whined, but they got to keep Duke, UVA and, NC St.

UVA-UNC is the longest continuous rivalry in the south. Its equivalent to Minn-Wisc (no one outside the game really cares about it, but they do).

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 3:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

I'm hoping they protect UW-UM first

Then when 2015 rolls around they add Iowa as the second protected rivalry

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Wow, cut off half my post

The rest of it should read, then in 2015 when they add a 9th conference game and a 2nd protected rivalry, Iowa fills that spot. It just seems silly to end the longest continuously played rivalry, without any reasoning.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

I cant believe these divisions period

With splitting UM/OSU, its hard to come up with divisions this bad.

I would have every team turn in their top 3 rivals, and protect that list as best as possible for everyone. How Wisconsin gets 1 of 3, I dont understand. Heck, they dont even get “just down the road” Northwestern.

Maybe they consider Illinois above Michigan St? I always thought MSU replaced (eventually) Chicago though.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 3:52 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

I don't care at all about Illinois

Basketball fans may disagree, but I don’t think there is any rivalry between UW and Illinois any more than any other team in the Big 10 east of the Mississippi

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

This, exactly.

You can’t screw up any worse than this without deliberately setting out to do so.

by SpartanDan on Sep 1, 2010 7:58 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

UNC doesn't care about it.

I didn’t know about it until you told me, and I would consider myself fairly literate on Carolina. Sure makes sense though.

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 3:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

UNC guy who posts on Tech board brings it up every 3rd post

Only reason I know.

Duke is Tech’s 2nd longest continuous rival, but no one really cares. In the 50s it was a huge game though.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 4:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

I only lived in Madison two years...

but I thought the big rivals were Minn, Iowa and Michigan St, in approximately that order.

Putting Wisconsin in a division with none of them is just stupid.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 3:41 PM EDT up reply actions  

Wisconsin's Fight song contains the line

“Run the ball ’round Minnesota”

You know that fight song that John Phillip Sousa called the greatest marching band song he’d ever heard

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

ummm...Chicago.

None of this new school version of the song.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 3:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

I always like that Wisc kept a rivalry going with a school that hadnt played football in 80 years

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 3:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

Bears, Bulls, Cubs

It’s in our blood to hate the very existence of Chicago.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

The song has changed several times

For awhile it was Chicago, then Northwestern, then Minnesota. Now it’s officially “Run the ball clear down the field” but everybody signs the minnesota line.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:55 PM EDT up reply actions  

Everybody "signs" the Minnesota line?

The whole school signs? How cool.

Just Kidding!

"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke

by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 1, 2010 4:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

Well played

Good catch… got all worked up there for minute. You can see the multiple errors in other posts.

I’m all good now as it looks like the Minnesota game will be protected and I assume Iowa will become the second protected game in 2015. So we only miss Iowa 2 in the next 5 years, not a huge deal.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 4:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

Who is Iowa's protected game?

Indiana? Really?

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 4:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

Looks like it

Black Heart Gold Pants is not happy

A Notre Dame Grad, born and raised in Wisconsin... life put me in the express lane to alcoholism.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 4:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

On the plus side...

they DO get to play jNW every year?

"Orators are most vehement when their cause is weak" Marcus Tullius Cicero

by Stuck in the Plains on Sep 1, 2010 4:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

God I love the jNWU acronym

they are after all, just Northwestern

A Notre Dame Grad, born and raised in Wisconsin... life put me in the express lane to alcoholism.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 5:03 PM EDT up reply actions  

I dont know how these could be the divisions

They are just amazingly stupid. Yours were infinitely better.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 4:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Apparenty

According to a link on Bucky’s 5th Quarter, the Badger Blog on SBNation, the winning percentages of both divisions going back to 1993 when PSU joined up are exactly .580. When Delany said he wanted competitive balance, he got perfect competitive balance.

A Notre Dame Grad, born and raised in Wisconsin... life put me in the express lane to alcoholism.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 5:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

Apparently not Apparenty...it's been a bad day

A Notre Dame Grad, born and raised in Wisconsin... life put me in the express lane to alcoholism.

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 5:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

With these divisions, they should go with my idea...

of flipping teams 2, 4, 6 every year. If balance is important, that keeps the balance going forward. Yeah, sure, sometimes UM and OSU end up in the same division, but thats the price you pay.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 5:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

A rivalry is

still a rivalry no matter when it is played. Michigan and OSU will still be protected. Wisconsin and Minnesota will still be protected. If they play the last weekend of the season, good, I don’t have to listen to what seems like a majority of Big 10 fans complain. If they don’t play that weekend but still play, good, tradition is still preserved.

Believe me, you don’t want OSU, Michigan, and PSU all in the same division. Competitive parity between divisions is much more important than whether or not fans of Michigan and Ohio State get to compare who has bigger dicks on the last weekend of the season or the second to last.

by George W. Beadle on Sep 1, 2010 2:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

Looks from that list like UW-IA is protected, not UW-Minn, and they both cant be

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

unless they do two cross rivalries like the SEC orginally did and got rid of

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Sounds like

this is the reason there’s talk of going to a 9 game conference schedule then.

by Pariahwulfen on Sep 1, 2010 2:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

got rid of?

"It’s not Disneyland, people. Get the hell out of the way." NYC Firefighter

by jokastrength on Sep 1, 2010 2:26 PM EDT up reply actions  

SEC only has 1 cross rival now

they changed in the late 90s I think. Originally, UK played LSU and MSU from the west every year, but now its just MSU.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

Thanks.

"It’s not Disneyland, people. Get the hell out of the way." NYC Firefighter

by jokastrength on Sep 1, 2010 2:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Uk played LSU every year from 1992*-2002

1992 is when divisions started, they actually played LSU annually back to 1952.

2001 and 2002 were both in Lexington. I guess 2001 was the end of the double rival, and as part of the new system, they ended up getting LSU at home again in 2002.

And, yes, 2002 was that game. I was there.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

wrong

we never played LSU until 2007

The new year approaching, click in. Let’s facelift bar! Open the wardrobe is not yet found love after another the right clothes? So, also waiting for? Immediate action bar!

by Old South on Sep 1, 2010 10:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

The problem with competitive parity is...

…that it’s not guaranteed to last. See also: Big XII.

by Gaknar on Sep 1, 2010 2:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

Bullshit, sir

First, because trying to predict competitive balance more than a year out is a fool’s errand. Second, because short term the West is probably stronger (due to Michigan’s abject suckitude).

Also, the last week of the season is Rivalry Week. This is true nationwide – and the Big Ten completely fucked it up.

by SpartanDan on Sep 1, 2010 8:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

1 : Barbasol Division, 2 : Ro-tel Division

Ro-tel looks slower.
BAR-BA-SOL SPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!

Nick Saban is my BFF

by cowcollege on Sep 1, 2010 2:12 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

Barbasol

also has two squads that will knock your fucking teeth in. Can’t wait to see Nebraska go to the Rose Bowl next year. LULZ all-around.

"Orators are most vehement when their cause is weak" Marcus Tullius Cicero

by Stuck in the Plains on Sep 1, 2010 3:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

Whew.

Thank GOD they didn’t split up Indiana and Purdue!

not drunk, just overserved

by Gen. Stoopnagle on Sep 1, 2010 3:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Ok...

Still not the perfect scenario (with a re-match possible) but it’s way better than the game being moved….

According to ESPN Big Ten Blogger Adam Rittenberg:

Several signs point toward the Ohio State-Michigan game remaining on the final Saturday of the regular season. We’ll know for sure tonight, as athletic directors Gene Smith (Ohio State) and Dave Brandon (Michigan) will appear on the Big Ten Network’s announcement show.

It doesn’t matter how many football games the SEC wins. We will always look down on you.

by devidee33 on Sep 1, 2010 4:04 PM EDT up reply actions  

Probly a good day to be a Razorback fan

Gawd do they hate Nutt. Watching this one blow up in his face is cake and frosting indeed for the pigs amongst us.

by JD4AU on Sep 1, 2010 1:19 PM EDT reply actions  

Razorback fans have their highest preseason ranking since 1990 (gawd, has it been that long?) and are looking forward to the first game Saturday. Most could give a rat’s ass what is happening to Colonel Dale in Oxford until we play in October. If you want to find some who do care, go to Hogville (aka the short bus faction of the fan base).

by Jim Grizzle on Sep 1, 2010 1:50 PM EDT up reply actions  

Wait, that should be “since 1991”. A long ass time ago, regardless.

by Jim Grizzle on Sep 1, 2010 1:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

Gator gloves

I think we need a moratorium on any Florida players doing this after watching that ESPN bumper all summer long where Ingram (I think?) flashes the script A after a touchdown in the SEC game. For shame, Gators.

by Tim James on Sep 1, 2010 1:22 PM EDT reply actions  

I just now saw this and I'm confused

If “the last guy on the black jack table” is really “standing on 14”, why would he be “looking to hit”? And that is irregardless of what the dealer is showing.

"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke

by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 1, 2010 1:34 PM EDT reply actions  

HIT IT AND GET PAID!

Also, beware the law nerd barrage on irregardless (irrespective is the preferred term, Donnie), in 5,4,3….

by HyperHyPo on Sep 1, 2010 2:04 PM EDT up reply actions  

irregardless is fine, its in the dictionary

People who think what the last guy at the table does affects the odds at all, on the other hand….

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

Well if that guy takes a card with a value higher than 6 when he hits

then that would help the dealer slightly….

right?

"It’s not Disneyland, people. Get the hell out of the way." NYC Firefighter

by jokastrength on Sep 1, 2010 2:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

And if he gets a 7+, it hurts the dealer slightly

and it turns out to be in perfect balance. The odds of the dealer busting dont change based on the guy hitting/staying.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:41 PM EDT up reply actions  

Ummm 6-

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:41 PM EDT up reply actions  

depends on the other cards showing too

and the count

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 2:41 PM EDT up reply actions  

The odds change with those

the odds of the dealer busting dont change whether the dealer gets card 1 on the stack or card 2 on the stack.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

This guy here is correct

However, that will not keep you from getting the angry looks from the rest of the table if you take the 10 card that would have busted the dealer.

"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke

by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 1, 2010 2:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

Its why I never sit at the end of the table

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:49 PM EDT up reply actions  

It's not your fault! most shoes guarantee that a ten is regressive anyway

lessening the impact on the dealer’s hand for that sort of thing. This would be why I quit gambling. People are stupid…

"Voetbal is pas totaal als je wint"- Coach Adun
"The greatest sin is to spurn the gift"- Coach Alistair

by Londonjoe on Sep 1, 2010 2:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

OldSouth's brief foray into card counting did not go as planned

Shit’s easy to do in theory but takes beaucoup practice. And yes, I could reliably count a deck in around 20 seconds.

The new year approaching, click in. Let’s facelift bar! Open the wardrobe is not yet found love after another the right clothes? So, also waiting for? Immediate action bar!

by Old South on Sep 1, 2010 11:04 PM EDT up reply actions  

It does, unless you're playing with an infinite deck

(That and it’s frustrating to see them steal the card that would have turned out perfect for you. Long term, the odds might be nearly the same – but you can tell exactly what would have happened this time.)

by SpartanDan on Sep 1, 2010 8:03 PM EDT up reply actions  

Just saw this linked somewheres else, so I’ll post it…just in case.

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/irregardless

by Screen Name 20 on Sep 1, 2010 2:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

"First Known Use: circa 1912"

God, I would love to go back in time and smack the idiot who coined that abomination over the head with an entrenching tool.

I'm afraid I have no choice but to sell you all for scientific experiments.

by boddagettaflyer on Sep 1, 2010 2:25 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

While we're on the subject of language pet peeves:

There’s no need to say, “The reason is because…” Either “The reason is…” or “Because…” will do just fine.

/looking right at you, girl in the front of property class

Brian Kelly says no commercial interruption.

by Ancient Chinese Secret on Sep 1, 2010 2:38 PM EDT up reply actions  

To quote one of my linguistics professors

Language is descriptive not prescriptive.

Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom. That is why the SEC has so many of them.

by gtne91 on Sep 1, 2010 2:42 PM EDT up reply actions  

Pah.

“Descriptive” is just language moral relativism!

"In case you're wondering what the offense should look like, that wasn't it." - Urban Meyer

by cantcatchuf on Sep 2, 2010 12:31 AM EDT up reply actions  

Agreed

It’s grating on the eyes/ears.

by Screen Name 20 on Sep 1, 2010 2:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

Thirded on the irregardless angst

The new year approaching, click in. Let’s facelift bar! Open the wardrobe is not yet found love after another the right clothes? So, also waiting for? Immediate action bar!

by Old South on Sep 1, 2010 11:05 PM EDT up reply actions  

My point was the conflicting terminology

If you’re “standing” on a number, you’re not “looking to hit”. If you are looking to hit, you’re showing or holding 14. Do I know you?

"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke

by MtnEer_in_SC on Sep 1, 2010 2:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

irregardless?

not drunk, just overserved

by Gen. Stoopnagle on Sep 1, 2010 3:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

Miami's ultra ugly-ass uni Pro Combat 2010 unis

By all means, please give them to my beloved Florida A&M before tomorrow night’s game for we all know everyone’s gonna be down at Sun Life to see The Marching “100” as usual, so why not make the team look good as well? Just stick to the Pro Combat ’09 edition w/the two-toned numbering in all-white.

I love South Florida, but not all the people in it, whereas I hate Tallahassee, but not all the people in it.

by Super C on Sep 1, 2010 3:05 PM EDT reply actions  

Looks like Fresno and Nevada are in the clear

BYU is going independent, their other sports are joining the WCC. (autoplay is enabled on the video that goes along with the story, FYI) Looks like Gonzaga won’t be a shoe-in for the conference auto-bid come March

Suck It WAC! Shouldn’t be long before Hawaii also goes Indy and the conference ceases to exist.

/sorry for mentioning basketball. Won’t happen again

by stempke on Sep 1, 2010 3:14 PM EDT reply actions  

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