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NEW PRODUCTS FROM ACS CAPITAL!


Does it ever seem like things in your college football life are just going too well?  Did you recently hire a shiny new coach?

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Did your biggest rival get Fingagunz'd?

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Did you recently avoid Integerization?

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Are you signing up new and interesting opponents?

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Hi, Gordon Liddy, convicted felon, here for ACS Capital.  Like you, I'm worried about my team's recent streak of incredible good fortune.  Experts are calling this coaching hire the best since Lou Holtz.  Fans are drinking Kool-Aid to make up for fifteen years of disappointment.  But you can be prepared with OTHER SHOE INSURANCE from ACS CAPITAL!

When the other shoe drops, and your entire football program is caught sneaking crack and illegal immigrants with no healthcare and sub-prime mortgages across the border, covering their trail by drilling unstable oil wells, you can be ready for the sad dose of reality with OTHER SHOE INSURANCE!

Buy your insurance where I buy mine: ACS Capital, the most respected and trusted source for advice on investments.  So call us as 1-800-BAD-JUJU.

Listen to that.  That's the sound of security.  That's sound of OTHER SHOE INSURANCE from ACS Capital!

 

**Special introductory rates for Nebraska, Arkansas, and Miami fans!  Call now!**

                                                                                                                                                                                                               

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