FanPost

INSIDE SCOOP ON THE CONFERENCE EXPANSION


I've been talking to a few people in the know and here's how things are
going to go down with regards to the whole expansion thing:

1) The Big Ten will expand to include the North Division from the Big 12
and the entire Big East Conference plus Temple. The new conference will be called the "Notre Dame and the Big Ten Conference". 

The new 27 team power conference will then subdivide into Four divisions.

The 4 Subdivisions will be as follows:

Corn Subdivision: Nebraska, Iowa, Iowa State, Kansas, Kansas State,
Illinois, Indiana, Purdue and Temple.

Rust Belt Division: Michigan, Michigan State, Minnesota, Wisconsin,
Northwestern, Ohio State, Penn State, Minnesota and Temple

The Big East Division: UConn, West Virginia, South Florida, Syracuse,
Rutgers, Cincinnati, Louisville, Pittsburgh and Temple

The Shameless Pandering to Television Division: Notre Dame

Notre Dame won't play any conference games during the regular season.  They will play a set yearly schedule that will include all three military academies, the directional Michigan schools, Boston College and Temple.  All the Notre Dame games will be home games.

The conference will go to a 4 team playoff to determine the winner of the
conference. Two subdivision winners will play each other. The 3rd
subdivision winner will play Notre Dame. The winner of these two
games will go on to play each other in the Championship game and the
winner will be assured a bid to the Rose Bowl where they will play Notre
Dame (again).

When asked about this ground-breaking new format, Big Ten Imperial
Grand Pooba, "King James Grande Diez Delany" shouting down from
his pedestal stated that there were some "pecularities" to the new
format but that they were in the best interest of the Big Ten and it's
fans. When asked why the conference was counting Temple thrice and
placing them in two of the subdivisions, his "Grandness" condescended
to speak: "Everyone needs a good homecoming opponent. Thus, all of
Temple's games will be road games and Temple will have to play 3
times a week but will get some weeks off where they will only play two
games a week."


2) In reaction to this startling development, The Big 12 South Division
has announced it's intention to merge with the Pac 10 conference. The
new conference will be called the "Red River - Hollywood - Nike Axis
of Influence". Nike chairman Phil Knight will be the New Chairman of
the conference. When contacted Chairman Knight had no comment.

3) In reaction to the two new megaconference, the SEC and the ACC
have announced plans to merge into a new conference to be called
the "ESSSS EEEEE SEEEE". The new 23 team conference will cover
most Southern region of the country televised on the new
KFC/NASCAR/CMT formerly known as ESPN. Boston College will be contracted as a
conference member since Boston is just too far to travel on a
Greyhound.

4) The 3 new Megaconferences have developed a new playoff system:
The two conference winners with the highest television Q ratings will
play one another. The 3rd will play Notre Dame for the right to play in
the new revamped Super Kollege Football Championship Bowl. The
new Super KFC Bowl will be the winner of the Q-rating game and Notre
Dame.

I think this is good news to everyone.

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