SPRING GAME ROUNDABOUT
by Spencer Hall on Apr 26, 2010 11:21 AM EDT
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PrintSpring games abounded this weekend: let us peruse them with the appropriate amount of interest and mild disrespect for any meaningful extrapolations from their results.
The attendance was but a mere 65,000 or so--shitty weather hampered the usual bum-rushing of the gates here--but tOSU's spring game did feature a fair dose of Terrelle Pryor casually flexing his newfound ability to throw over the middle, but was more about the backups at qb, where Kenny Guiton managed to put some daylight between himself and prototypical Tressel qb Joe Bauserman. (White, unimpressive in context, and could probably win ten or eleven games anyway in headscratching fashion.)
SOMEWHAT LESS EXCITING: Illinois had 2000 or so fans for their spring scrimmage, and if you were one of the ones there a spot in Fan Valhalla awaits you for somehow staying loyal through this horrific era of Illini football. (That could be said at just about any time in Illini history, but sure, take the credit now.) Their quarterback race is tight, but not in the good way.
BILL SNYDER LOVES A BLOWOUT, EVEN WHEN IT'S HIS TEAM VERSUS HIS TEAM. Carson Coffman and the Purple team destroyed the White team 79-0 in K-State's spring scrimmage. Hopefully the part of the White team was played by Weber State, which would a.) totally be a Bill Snyder classic move, and b.) would mean K-State just hadn't engaged in a form of hazing even the rapiest fraternity would call "excessive." Bill Snyder = No Vaseline.
MEANWHILE ACROSS THE STATE: While not concluded by any stretch of the imagination, a strong performance in the spring game for Kansas has us all one step closer to the Kale Pick Singularity at quarterback. He threw two TDs and no himselves.
DJ WOODS, MARDY GILYARD HANDS THE PORKOPOLIS BALLER'S HAT TO YOU. Woods stepped up nicely in Cincy's spring game, catching six passes for 88 yards and a TD and throwing a sixty yard completion to Vidal Hazelton, too. Braids with shells are a must to properly fill the role, however.
THIS STRANGE MUSIC CALLED DEFENSE. Just assume a dimensional polarity inversion happened in Houston, whose spring game somehow involved "defense."
WE DEMAND VIDEO IMMEDIATELY. From the Michigan State spring game:
THE BEST 6-YARD RUN. EVER. In the second quarter, 360-lb. Antonio Jeremiah lined up at fullback, took the hand-off from Cousins, and rumbled through the line for six yards before being tackled by what had to be a stunned Jon Misch. I don't expect this to be a goal-line play for MSU this season as the handoff was slow to develop, but I believe there's no higher form of entertainment than watching an offensive lineman rumbling down the field with the ball, leaving the crushed bodies of safeties and cornerbacks in his wake.
Mark Dantonio's descent into madness is not, it appears, totally complete. GO CRAZY TIE-MAN GO.
ARKANSAS DOES THIS PROPERLY: Even teams, over 700 yards of offense, and loads of festivity even without Ryan Mallett.
RASHOMON-ON-WESTWOOD. UCLA looked pretty good; or they didn't; directed by Akira Kurosawa.
AND IF YOU DO INDEED CARE ABOUT BOSTON COLLEGE: They might have a qb controversy.
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You missed the Big 10's upcoming acquisition...
Rutgers had 20,000 at their Spring Game (suck it, Illini).
by greasetruck nickd on Apr 26, 2010 11:39 AM EDT reply actions
There will be a hue and cry....
…for Kenny Guiton, upon Pryor’s first pick of the season. It’s just how these things work.
"I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach." - W. C. Fields
by W.C. Fields' Nose on Apr 26, 2010 11:46 AM EDT reply actions
What about the ~3,000 at Minnesota's spring game?
Sure, nobody but me would admit to being there. And sure, it made me want to ask for a refund on my season tickets because Adam Weber and the running backs look fucking horrible. But it still happened.
Everyone fails. The successful learn from their failures. I just wish we'd quit giving ourselves so many learning opportunities.
by WhiteSpeedReceiver on Apr 26, 2010 11:55 AM EDT reply actions
Best Six-Yard Run Ever
Shades of Refrigerator Perry, I do love watching the linemen run too.
What I want to know is, was John Misch stunned before or after the tackle?
"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke
Probably both.
Before, he was stunned at being actually on the field, after, he was stunned that his relatively lilliputian frame (5’10", 220) was still functional after being hit by a lineman the size of a Volvo.
"Ohio State backup quarterback Joe Bauserman"
See now you’re just dredging up football program stereotypes and passing them off . . .
[does quick Google search]
Holy Craig Krenzel.
While Kenny Guiton looked decent in the spring game
if Terrelle Pryor gets hurt and we are forced to play backups against any opponent not named Eastern Michigan, our season will not turn out well. I have to worry about a defense that looks vulnerable to a backup QB. If you will excuse me, I must refoil my hat.
by Crabapple Buck on Apr 26, 2010 12:14 PM EDT reply actions
The OSU spring game..
was also televised live on the BTN.
Shitty weather, 10 bucks to get in and the game is being televised in every bar in the state and 65K still show up.
That is actually very impressive.
Penn State Blue-White game review
Mostly crappy weather kept attendance lower than usual.
Top 2 quarterbacks Kevin Newsome and Matt McGloin (walk-on) looked pretty bad. Typically, half of the fan base decries the terrible situation at QB, while the other half thinks the defense is awesome.
Early enrollee Paul Jones looked very good (only 2 TD’s, another dropped) at QB. Complaining about JoePa’s giving preference to upper classmen commenced.
Watched the game on the stadium scoreboard from the tailgating lot so all of the above may be wrong.
Crushingly, did hear the Miley Cyrus song in a large student area of the tailgate. In somewhat redeeming fashion, random song was not broken into and I believe I was the only person in my vicinity that was aware of last week’s embarrassment
So..
it was was party in HAP-PY VAL-LAY?!?!
by ESS EEE SEE Speed on Apr 26, 2010 12:26 PM EDT up reply actions
was = a*
*I blame Monday, and Todd McShay.
by ESS EEE SEE Speed on Apr 26, 2010 12:46 PM EDT up reply actions
Check out the sideline observers at the UCLA game...
and if you ever wondered if Tom Brady can out-metro a European soccer player…
the answer is YES…yes he can.
by zzgator on Apr 26, 2010 12:27 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
how do I unsee that?
"Hush now, let it go now. I know it's time to go. Time to let this fall from my hands" VNV Nation, "From My Hands"
by Stuck in the Plains on Apr 26, 2010 1:02 PM EDT up reply actions
After reading only your headline, but not the remainder of your post,
I briefly mistook Mr. Brady for a European soccer player.
"In case you're wondering what the offense should look like, that wasn't it." - Urban Meyer
Happens to Michigan men a lot from what I hear.
(Just trying to bring the conference showdown over to this topic as well.)
Can I issue an pre-emptive DWM?
Yes? Great.
/MDWM
"...when the devil says to you: do not drink, answer him: I will drink, and right freely, just because you tell me not to."
— Martin Luther
Tom Brady has a chain-wallet
Close. It only counts in Horseshoes, hand grenades and Penn State football.
by SouthBayBuckeye on Apr 28, 2010 2:08 PM EDT up reply actions
About 9000 at Kentucky's spring game
which was cold and wet. No word yet on whether the dreary weather was caused by Rich Brooks.
who thought the weather was bullshit.*
*just getting that requirement out of the way.
by ESS EEE SEE Speed on Apr 26, 2010 1:06 PM EDT up reply actions
Things I learned from the Blue-Gold Game:
1. Wooooo Manti Te’o!
2. Apparently you’re allowed to have the quarterback hand the ball to another player, who then runs up the field and thus gains yardage. I did not know that, but it looks effective.
3. The players are all still too fat and too slow, but they’re getting there. The offense running at full speed will be fun to watch and hard to stop.
4. I need a refill on my prescription of Xanax to deal with the kicking game.
Brian Kelly says no Burger King at 3 AM.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Apr 26, 2010 1:20 PM EDT reply actions
Point #2
Dude, sorry to be cruel, but Navy showed y’all that last year, over and over and over.
"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Apr 26, 2010 1:28 PM EDT up reply actions
No argument there.
But this year, IT LEARNS.
Brian Kelly says no Burger King at 3 AM.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Apr 26, 2010 1:40 PM EDT up reply actions
Point #1
The ND grad who works in my office says, “Woooo Manti Te’o!” too.
"I like the taste of danger most of all." - Jonatha Brooke
by MtnEer_in_SC on Apr 26, 2010 1:51 PM EDT up reply actions
I think they are still in recovery from having a decided schematic advantage.
Now under Brian Kelly, they have to play teams straight up.
by Crabapple Buck on Apr 26, 2010 2:05 PM EDT up reply actions
DRAW PLAY!
/chugs Drān-O
Brian Kelly says no Burger King at 3 AM.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Apr 26, 2010 2:29 PM EDT up reply actions
I think announced attendance was in the 27k range...
… I wasn’t there, but Nate Montana’s numbers looked great and an old classmate that was at the game said he looked impressive.
Both he and Crist looked better than I expected.
Montana was underthrowing his recievers at first, but he looked pretty solid by the end. If Crist gets knocked out, I think we’ll be able to at least survive with Montana. It’s nice when your backups look like they’ve actually seen a footbaw before (LOOKING RIGHT AT YOU CHARLIE WEIS).
To be fair, though, Kelly deliberately kept the defense vanilla, so neither QB had to face any real pressure.
Brian Kelly says no Burger King at 3 AM.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Apr 26, 2010 2:15 PM EDT up reply actions
This is horrible to admit,
but having survived the Callahan era at Nebraska, I’m feeling a bit of kinship with Domers these days. If Kelly is your Pelini, then I wish you well, good sir.
"...when the devil says to you: do not drink, answer him: I will drink, and right freely, just because you tell me not to."
— Martin Luther
Georgia Tech spring game
Canceled at half time due to the storm.
Here are some clips:
Clock stops for first downs and touchdowns
So, there were some stops in play. So maybe 40 minutes.
Another blow to my world view...
I was under the impression that thunderstorms could not withstand Paul Johnson.
by Counter Trap on Apr 26, 2010 2:55 PM EDT up reply actions
Biggest Clowns on Sports Web (BruinsRuinsNation.com) Dept:
Clever, enjoyable post. Just one pick-nit: Why in the world would this highly respected site refer anyone to the clowns at Bruins Nation? (Roshomon-Akira Kurosawa-ucla spring game review)
Bruins Nation writers are not funny, smart, clever, entertaining, insightful, blah, blah, blah….I really cannot think of a worse sports site out there…Even the worse ND site is better than the garbage put out by Nestor and Co.
Because there are lots of grainy/blurry pictures posted there?
Also, where else are you going to find someone saying that Skippy’s new revolver offense isn’t going to backfire?
I haven't been over there since the fatwa against Karl Dorrell was going on.
Incidentally, did you know that UCLA and Washington are the only schools that faced Charlie Weis more than once and never beat him? OH THE SHAME
Brian Kelly says no Burger King at 3 AM.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Apr 26, 2010 3:34 PM EDT up reply actions
In Washington's case, it was Ty Willingham's fault.
by Crabapple Buck on Apr 26, 2010 4:02 PM EDT up reply actions
Except the second game...
that was the ref’s fault.
/rimshot
by ESS EEE SEE Speed on Apr 26, 2010 4:11 PM EDT up reply actions
That Jake Locker needed to be put in his place.
You can’t have random acts of fun, much less spontaneous ones, on a football field. That’s how the communists plan to take over.
Signed,
The Penn Wagers/Ron Cherry Foundation for a Better America. Giving Fun The Business Since 1974.
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