THE CURIOUS INDEX, 3/8/2010
by Spencer Hall on Mar 8, 2010 10:02 AM EST
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PrintWE HAVE A TREMENDOUS AMOUNT OF RESPECT FOR THE UNIVERSITY OF AUBURN. Around 45 seconds in, if you please.
This is either an unintentional confusion of Auburn's name, or a deliberate slight, since we all know Auburn's real name is THE University of Phoenix, not "the University of Auburn." CyberTyde delights in your manipulations at the hands of his finest creation, the SABAN-BOT FOOTBALL COACH AND SOFT SERVE ICE CREAM MACHINE MODEL 3899. The ice cream doesn't come from his ass, you disgusting person. It comes from his penis, and he'll be distributing it at the Hoover Wal-Mart Supercenter personally today at 3 p.m. The lines will be around the block.
TASED AND CONFUSED. LSU wideout Terrance Tolliver was arrested for disturbing the peace, public intoxication and interfering with a police officer early Sunday morning for his involvement in a fight outside Fred's in Baton Rouge. Tolliver would merely be awarded a single point for getting three misdemeanor citations in a night, but the score will be upped to four because he rode the lightning, always a bonus time situation in Fulmer Cup points. (Via: ATVS)
FURTHER OREGONiAN INTOXICATION. Josh Israel Kaddu, a sophomore linebacker with the Oregon Ducks, soils his team's spotless 2010 disciplinary reputation by picking up a citation for underage drinking in Eugene. WHY ARE THEY OUT OF CONTROL HE SHOULD BE FIRED<---every stupid-ass columnist stuck for content in the next week.
THE HARDEST PART ABOUT STEALING A WII IS TELLING YOUR PARENTS THAT YOU'RE GAY. Stealing is wrong, but stealing and stealing a Wii is wrong and third-grade gay. He's a walk-on who hasn't done anything with USF yet, so no points awarded, but if Jim Leavitt were there he'd give that child the good, solid possible slapping/shaking/headbutt he needed to keep him in line.
WHY DID YOU WARN HIM? Was Bobby Bowden headed to Rio? And if so, why did an MGoBlog reader keep him from being robbed at stunning-model-point?
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The ice cream doesn’t come from his ass, you disgusting person. It comes from his penis
Tastes like victory.
_________________
I'm Banana dammit!!!
by BurritoBrosShits on Mar 8, 2010 10:09 AM EST reply actions
Typical
That a Bama fan would know what little Nicky’s dick tastes like. Or, more importantly, proudly claim to know.
Sullivan013
SHHHHHHHHHHHH.......
_________________
I'm Banana dammit!!!
by BurritoBrosShits on Mar 8, 2010 12:26 PM EST up reply actions
Only an Aub...
…would accuse a known and proud Gator fan of being a Bama fan. Reminds me, what does the “N” in Auburn stand for.
Knowledge.
UGA's about to make its '10 FC debut. . .
Mettenberger arrested in Valdosta over the weekend.
by Silver Britches on Mar 8, 2010 10:45 AM EST reply actions
Seriously...
…name an LSU student who HASN’T been arrested in a bar fight. I even got two credit hours for one of ’em.
Fake Pundit. Real Fan.
http://www.andthevalleyshook.com
by Poseur on Mar 8, 2010 11:19 AM EST up reply actions 3 recs
Well...
…never been arrested, but I was cuffed and put in the back of the cruiser. They waited until the crowd cleared out and let me go. The cop even told me they had to do it so stop the ruckus. I guess I was the closest one.
by Kevin@LSU 2.0 on Mar 8, 2010 7:15 PM EST up reply actions
Two counts of having a fake identification?
“University of Georgia quarterback Zach Mettenberger was arrested in Remerton, Ga., over the weekend on five misdemeanor charges, the Remerton police chief told the AJC today.
Mettenberger was charged with underage consumption/possession of alcohol, disorderly conduct, obstruction and two counts of having a fake identification, Remerton Police Chief Mike Terrell said."
Two fakes.
Gotta have the backup when your starter gets confiscated.
I'm Irish. I'm going to have to deal with something being wrong the rest of my life.
by boddagettaflyer on Mar 8, 2010 11:08 AM EST up reply actions
Knowing Swindle, that's a bonus point.
At least Mett was dedicated.
by Silver Britches on Mar 8, 2010 11:32 AM EST up reply actions
Stealing a Wii
Hm. We almost had to ditch a pledge for getting busted trying to sneak wine coolers into Sanford “for his date”. Dude.
Looks like Tolliver hit the Saturday night hat trick. Public intox, disturbing the peace, and interfering/assaulting the police.
Kinda like the Gordie Howe hat trick for the Fulmer Cup set.
I really don't know if anything sums up America better. It is simultaneously preposterous, incrediably laughable, impressive, charming, redicoulous, expensive, overpopulated, wonderful, American. -Sir Stephen Fry on visiting the Iron Bowl
Llosa
Trying to think who would get less leeway on a football team for off-field shenanigans than a walk-on third-string kicker. What an embesal.
by Jamie DeVriend on Mar 8, 2010 11:47 AM EST via mobile reply actions
twice the lightning rides
We’ve been kind of quiet since Perrilloux so it’s nice to get back on the board. Similar to our lack of instate rival, I would note that LSU has a built in Fulmer Cup advantage courtesy of the BRPD excessive force multiplier since officers in that fair city use the taser at twice the rate of other local jurisdictions.
Gainesville, FL police are pretty trigger happy on the tasers too. “Don’t taze me bro” happened in the University Memorial Auditorium, after all.
Team Speed Kills
SBNation's SEC Blog
And considering our inherent advantage we still underachievers
I think Orson needs to alter our bonus ride-the-lightening points from 3 to 1.5. In the interest of fairness. Seriously Orson, it almost feels like charity, and we at LSU don’t want any freaking charity! Don’t take pity on us — the truth is we CAN do better, and we just need to step it up.
Gregatron is not responsible for any of the crap he just wrote.
St. Louis vegetarian blog
Alabama Polytechnic Institute is the correct name
or was until 1960, anyway.
There's one good thing at least...
…at least members of the football team and basketball team at LSU work together. TEAM LSU!
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