THE CURIOUS INDEX, 3/22/2010

CARL JOHNSON LOVES YOU MR REFEREE. It's spring again...this is the time to fall in love...and practice goal line situations for the fall. 

Carl Johnson is the gentleman at the end who hoists the referee in the air. John Brantley is the quarterback who steps up in the pocket and throws to what appears to be his third read, a sight which may stun those used to Florida's quarterback looking 1-2 and then running headlong down the field brick-walls-be-damned. Michigan's also hard at work on all the drills that make champions: chop-stepping under awnings, grunting on cue from their coach, and in general looking way, way different than whatever Florida's doing. <-----Rich Rodriguez totally hates fun. 

BECAUSE NORTH CAROLINA WILL HAVE 80,000 PEOPLE AT THE GAME (IF YOU COUNT EVERYONE IN A TWENTY MILE RADIUS): The North Carolina spring game will be televised on ESPN on April 10th, and

Butch Davis already knows what's up, attendance-wise. 

On April 10th, Carolina Football will host the Blue-White Spring Football Game at Kenan Stadium - a game that will be televised nationally on ESPN at 3 p.m. for every college football fan and recruit to see. Carolina Football and I need you to take that next step with us - and to be in Chapel Hill on that day to support our student-athletes and your football program. We need you in Kenan Stadium that day to represent this University in the best way possible.

They'll have face-painting, a 40 yard dash contest similar to Florida's open "Fastest Man On Campus" race, and HDTVs to give away for the fraternity or sorority with the highest attendance, meaning you and several of your friends can make up a frat, drive to Chapel Hill, and claim your prize on the 10th because it's UNC, and they don't quite grok this football-ish thing or why you're playing it against yourself in the spring. 

PEOPLE WHO MAY ATTEND THEIR SPRING GAME IN DISGUSTING NUMBERS: Alabama, whose spring game will air on the 17th on ESPN, whose decided to also air the Penn State, LSU, and Auburn games on various heads of the ABCSPN hydra. Complete schedule goes hyah: if you care to watch punts called for fair catch all day, the UGA spring game will air on CSS on the 10th. (HT: CGB) 

AHHH, CONTRAST. The headline: 

NU's Pelini: 'Offense is very capable'

...and the first sentence of the piece...

Nebraska's opponents scored a full point fewer per game than any other team in college football last season.

PEDESTRIAN-FRIENDLY KEY WEST. Mike Leach status watch: toodling around Key West, discovering that it is "pedestrian friendly," (i.e. full of people who've lost their licenses to DUI,) fishing when he can, doing less than he thought he would, and generally wanting to coach football again without any specifics. Lawyers who open practices in Key West start five days a week, and in a year are in the office twice a week and keeping office hours at a bar. It's like living in molasses, time-wise, and sounds pretty tedious--

/leaves

/moves to Key West

/becomes toilet paper smuggler to Cuba 

/IMMENSE WEALTH