CONFIDENCE IS IMPORTANT AND A VITAMIN OF GREAT IMPORTANCE
by Spencer Hall on Feb 8, 2010 6:10 PM EST
Email
Print
Les Miles missed on a recruit he should have nabbed, if confidence and horse-sized balls are still the hallmark of the Miles School of Testicular Thinking. Recruit Lynden Trail of Florida, put 'em on the table son and tell us what you think of Florida's recruiting class this year and their expectations.
I know we’ll bring at least 2-3 national championships," Trail said.
There's no job too immense when you've got...CONNNNFIDENCE. God bless 18 year olds. We used to have that kind of gusto. For instance, when we left high school we swore we'd win Florida at least five Quiz Bowl Championships. That was before we started staying up all night playing Sim City and drinking Banana Red Mad Dog 20/20, which is even more cracked than Blue Raspberry because there are at least blue berries in this world, and nothing close to a red banana. Unless you're counting those tiny red plaintains, and you know for damn sure the Red Bull marketing staff didn't know they existed. After the Mad Dog came the nitrous, and then Mario Kart, and then the profligate lost years abroad and waiting tables....
...and fifteen years later WHAMMO you're sitting on your couch writing about high schoolers' casual remarks for a living. So to review: drink Mad Dog, play computer games, and eventually work from home while wearing the same pants for three days straight. How this was supposed to be a cautionary tale is lost to us. Carry on.
(That is from Clambake, Conan O'Brien's favorite Elvis movie and our favorite, as well. At the 3:00 mark everyone drops powerful LSD. At one point Elvis sees imaginary cowboys and indians fighting in stock footage. It is either the best meta-commentary on Elvis in decline made by Clambake's director, or it is the worst musical number ever made. There is also a song about working on a boat. It's total shit and you should watch it now.)
18 comments
|
0 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
Nothing as sexy as confidence....
just ask any plastic surgeon.
by zzgator on Feb 8, 2010 6:19 PM EST via mobile reply actions
Question:
Are these 2-3 national championships before or after Urbano moves to Los Angeles to coach the newly relocated Rams?
This is your job? I thought the only way people get paid to blog is when they do it on the clock. Same reason I never poop at home…why do it for free when I can get paid to take a dump? Same concept to blogging.
Way to take it to the next level!
"When you argue correctly, you're never wrong."-Nick Naylor
by Hook85 on Feb 8, 2010 11:12 PM EST via mobile reply actions
The great Ryan Perrilloux once said...
…I’ll contend for the Heisman as a true freshman.
A bold statement indeed.
the world will truly never have a shortage
of 18-year-olds talking out of their asses.
by ramblingamblinjohn on Feb 9, 2010 8:43 AM EST up reply actions
Clambake is up there
My theory is that Elvis movies can be judged by the quality of the girl and the foil. In this film, Shelley Fabares is the girl and Bill Bixby is the foil, making it second only to Change of Habit, in which Mary Tyler Moore is the girl and God is the foil.
Speedway is practically the same movie, with cars instead of boats and Bill Bixby reprising his role as the foil, but Nancy Sinatra is no Shelley Fabares.
I'm with CraigT on Shelley Fabares . . .
. . . which is why my favorite Elvis movie is “Girl Happy.” Well, that and “Viva Las Vegas,” but I can’t pretend I watch “Viva Las Vegas” for the plot.
Don’t mention quiz bowl. I was not once but twice screwed out of quiz bowl championships at the University of Georgia. I’ll tell you about them sometime, but I’m still bitter.
One of my favorite Mitch Hedberg jokes concerns red bananas. “On a traffic light, green means go and yellow means slow down, but it’s the opposite on a banana. On a banana, yellow means ‘go ahead,’ green means ‘wait a while,’ and red means ‘where the $%#&! did you get that banana?’”
Go 'Dawgs!
I believe Chris Leak said something similar
Right after being recruited, he said something to effect of “I look forward to winning three or four national championships at Florida.”
Under Zook.
As did Jimmah
at the infamous Hummers-and-hair-gel signing press conference. Finished with an under-.500 record as a starter. Whatevs.
Also, Sim City is totally tits. Les Miles Memorial Square is located at the corner of BIG BALLS AVE. and CLOCK MANAGEMENT BLVD. (currently closed for construction).
Brian Kelly says no Burger King at 3 AM.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Feb 9, 2010 10:05 AM EST up reply actions
Hey, I resemble that remark!
I told everyone who was dumb enough to listen that I would make them forget a guy who finished 2d at NCAAs in the steeplechase. If you ever meet me and don’t like me, then ask me how I did at the steeple.
My Dawgs put a hickey on 'em!
Graceland, circa '92
At the time, Priscilla is still running the joint as the executor of Lisa Marie’s trust fund, and every part of the tour has a slapdash, cram-stuff-where-it-fits vibe. However, there are two glaring omissions. First, there’s no evidence Ginger Alden ever existed. His death is even described in the passive voice: “Elvis’s body was discovered…”; “paramedics were called…” etc.
Second, during the section on Elvis’s movies, the running commentary on the tour headsets (narrated by rustic character actor Lance LeGault of The A-team fame) points out a display containing every Elvis film script, bound and labeled in leather sleeves like they’re Bibles.
Now, excluding concert films, Elvis starred in thirty-one movies, which Lance mentions in your headset. However, the stack only held thirty scripts—they dropped Clambake.
Had they switched to headsets in 1992?
They must have been pretty new at the time, if so. My first time through was 1990 or later, and they still had a live tour guide in each room. The guides would do their bits and then send us off to the next room. I don’t no if they rotated or if they specialized. It’s possible that one woman did both the TV room and the upholstered room; I’m not sure. I do know that a different woman did the jungle room.
The next time, several years later, they had switched to personal tape players with headsets, which did increase tourist volume but eliminated the opportunity to ask questions.
The second trip was in the late ’90s. Between the two they had converted the handball court into a giant gold record display. The handball building, of course, was the last place anyone saw him alive.
My favorite Elvis movie is probably Wild in the Country, but it isn’t in the same category fluffy, girl-chasing category as these others.
The blonde guy towards the end with that hoTTness of a mamasita?
He looks like both:
A. the dad from the Courtship of Eddie’s Father
B. Bruce Baxter from the old-school live action Incredible Hulk (Lou Ferrigno TV show)
When did Eddie’s father/. . . .er. . . .Bruce Baxter get blonde hair?
"As for being a Raiders fan, I wouldn't wish that fucking shit on anybody." [the venerable OTS at Roll Bama Roll}
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
Certain photos copyright © 2012 by Associated Press or Getty Images. Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Associated Press and Getty Images is strictly prohibited.
