AN ERRAND WE HAD TO RUN
by Orson on Jan 25, 2010 3:01 PM EST
51 comments
Step one: this.
Step two: (click all photos to embiggen)
Step three:
Step four:
Step five:
Step six:
Mission accomplished, Team EDSBS.
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Accepting requests for sequel efforts at this time. On tap: Hot Topic, Sephora, Spencer Gifts.
by Holly on Jan 25, 2010 3:04 PM EST reply actions
Auntie Anne’s Pretzels seems appropriate for some reason. And Lane Bryant is always hiring good people.
by The Bull Gator on Jan 25, 2010 3:09 PM EST reply actions
YEAH!
*jumping group high five
**screen pause at moment of hands slapping
final credits in cooper black font, color yellow, w/ cheesy music
by Kevin@LSU on Jan 25, 2010 3:10 PM EST reply actions
#3: Sigh. Now I’ll never get that assistant manager position.
Now, if he gets a Chik-Fil-A job, he can finally get that scholarship he needs.
by brougham on Jan 25, 2010 3:12 PM EST reply actions
@ brougham
True, but learning under a twist expert like Lane will only improve your future prospects.
by The Bull Gator on Jan 25, 2010 3:18 PM EST reply actions
One hundred and one fucking cocktails to you sir. Well done.
by Boardmaster Brian on Jan 25, 2010 3:19 PM EST reply actions
“I know that I can walk out of here and say this, that we’ve been here for 14 months and there’s not one day I didn’t give everything I had to Orange Julius…”
by Joe Tereshinski IV on Jan 25, 2010 3:27 PM EST reply actions
Did you make a last minute pre-order for Mass Effect 2 while you were there?
by Tim James on Jan 25, 2010 3:30 PM EST reply actions
@ #2: And it bears a passing resemblance to David Cutcliffe.
by RanchyBalls on Jan 25, 2010 3:32 PM EST reply actions
Ya know he is such a big pussy he will probably have USC attorneys write you a bitchy letter or worse yet contact local law enforcement to complain.
Don’t shoot the messenger: that’s just the sort of thing that douches do.
by keo on Jan 25, 2010 3:37 PM EST reply actions
Monte could coordinate, err, the used games… The Tampa Two, for one!
by collegegameballs on Jan 25, 2010 3:39 PM EST reply actions
+1,000 cocktails to you Orson. Fucking brilliant
by idahobuckeye on Jan 25, 2010 3:41 PM EST reply actions
The best part is, if Orson saves that FedEx receipt he can write it off this years’ taxes.
by 4.0 Point Stance on Jan 25, 2010 3:49 PM EST reply actions
That post office is awfully close to the best BBQ in Atlanta…
by 12-inch Idongivafuck Sandwich on Jan 25, 2010 3:55 PM EST reply actions
Did Hello Kiffin leave his Barnes & Knoxville Rosetta Stone “Hick” language course CDs at UT?
by yoyofutbawl on Jan 25, 2010 3:58 PM EST reply actions
It’s also close to Emory, where some in-laws live. I should go to Orson’s place next time we are up for Christmas.
BTW, are you cock teases going to put out with your favorite restaurants or do the locals already know what you’re talking about?
by Tim James on Jan 25, 2010 4:17 PM EST reply actions
I vote for Teavana.
Those little aprons… some hipster glasses… Kiffin fanning the scent of Vanilla Cardamom Oolong to some Buckhead biddies. Quality.
by Stephen on Jan 25, 2010 4:25 PM EST reply actions
Wish I could have been in that GameStop when you walked in and asked for an application, Senor Swindle. The look on the people’s faces must have been priceless…
by Philip on Jan 25, 2010 4:25 PM EST reply actions
I have to wonder if Kiffykins will even get the joke. I just don’t see him subscribing to The Onion.
by SC_Eer on Jan 25, 2010 4:30 PM EST reply actions
There are not enough cocktails, Sir Swindle!!! Yeah, 12 inch, c’mon! This local does not know what BBQ place you are talking about and Google maps is not helping!
by Miss Horn Dawg on Jan 25, 2010 4:35 PM EST reply actions
There is no such thing as decent chopped/sliced BBQ outside of NC. It’s usually slathered in some gooky red or mustard sauce and is overcooked with the sauce used to cover that up.
by yoyofutbawl on Jan 25, 2010 4:39 PM EST reply actions
Woo hoo! Historic Kirkwood! Which barbecue, which bar?
by NCT on Jan 25, 2010 4:39 PM EST reply actions
Wouldn’t Kiffin go straight into management at the corporate level rather than working the register at one of the stores?
by ColoBama on Jan 25, 2010 4:39 PM EST reply actions
Did you list recruiting violations under the “Have you ever been convicted…”?
I’m sure we’re all looking forward to the picture of all the fired-up geeks at the GameStop going shirtless.
Of course, that picture will only happen if he gets the job. He probably won’t, and will then accuse Urban Meyer of texting the GameStop manager while the interview was still in progress.
by pbrown on Jan 25, 2010 4:50 PM EST reply actions
Best BBQ in Atlanta:
Not sure how much detail you guys want, but the food is absolutely awesome.
by 12-inch Idongivafuck Sandwich on Jan 25, 2010 5:02 PM EST reply actions
Excelsior as always, gentlemen.
pbrown @ 30 – Corch Meyers had a little freakout when he found out that the Princess is in another castle. He told Shelley he’d stop playing, but then he went out and bought Super Mario Bros. 2 the very next day.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Jan 25, 2010 5:09 PM EST reply actions
28: Check the name of the poster for “best bar.”
Fox Bros. has a special sometimes that’s a rib meat sandwich. It’s gloriously stupid. I dream about it.
by brougham on Jan 25, 2010 5:15 PM EST reply actions
I hope you listed Al Davis as a reference.
by Brian O'Blivion on Jan 25, 2010 5:29 PM EST reply actions
@33: Damn, embedding the name of the place inside a blog name website link. That is too meta even for me, so I’m not sure if I can accept this recommendation.
by Tim James on Jan 25, 2010 5:36 PM EST reply actions
They would never hire him, as he is lacking in management experience and they would question his loyalty to the organization.
by Smyth on Jan 25, 2010 6:14 PM EST reply actions
He’d get his pay docked for telling customers lies about Gametrader.
by MCab on Jan 25, 2010 6:38 PM EST reply actions
Criminy, Aces isn’t even the best bar on that street.
by Holly on Jan 25, 2010 6:48 PM EST reply actions
yoyo @27
I’ve eaten bbq pork all over this great state of GA(and some foreign states) and there is none to be had any better than that in Jefferson,GA at the Iron Pig. Sauce at your discretion. not far off I85.
by Gene on Jan 25, 2010 10:18 PM EST reply actions
the best headline on the onion ticker:
Jared Allen helps local dickhead become bigger asshole.
by mrpelicanpants on Jan 26, 2010 8:44 AM EST reply actions
Thanks, 12 inch. Have not tried Fox Bros. yet. It has to be better than the crap up my way (Williamson Brothers).
by Miss Horn Dawg on Jan 26, 2010 9:21 AM EST reply actions
I thought running with an Onion story was a domain reserved for Scott Wolf
by blazin on Jan 26, 2010 9:22 AM EST reply actions
Arguing about who has the best barbecue is silly. If they use decent pork, cook it at a low temperature for a REALLY long time, and aren’t completely retarded in combining simple ingredients into a sauce, it’s going to be tasty as hell. It ain’t rocket surgery. Slow-cooked pig + smoke + barbecue sauce not from a jar = tastes good.
by Golden Hand on Jan 26, 2010 9:25 AM EST reply actions
At first, I was going to comment that your penmanship could use some work. Then I realized that, channeling Lane Kiffin, a 5th grader’s handwriting would be most appropriate.
by scafidi on Jan 26, 2010 11:39 AM EST reply actions
Wow. It took a techie to tell it.
Thanks, Golden Hand.
by Gen. Stoopnagle on Jan 26, 2010 11:42 AM EST reply actions
Is Orange Julius still around? If not, then Sbarro.
by Eric on Jan 26, 2010 3:00 PM EST reply actions
“Orson Swindle says:
Penmanship is for dickheads."
Totally untrue. I write out each post at Storming the Floor longhand, and have our intern Guillermo type it in. I get the feeling he really digs the curlicues and serifs.
by Eric on Jan 26, 2010 3:08 PM EST reply actions
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