PAUL JOHNSON APOLOGIZES, EXPLAINS HIS COMMENTS

Thanks; this helps alleviate the pain of the “Ramble On You Dawg” post earlier this week.

Listen to CPJ here:
http://media.790thezone.com/Podcasts/1348/paul_johnson_12-1-09.mp3

I loooove how so-called “news organizations” 0 are now quoting blogs and providing attribution to Internet handles. They’re not even trying anymore.

0 CNN, AJC, probably others

Now that I think about it, the fullback dive really is the football equivalent of going for the nuts.

This story needs a chart of things Paul Johnson cares about.

Right after Paul Johnson signed at Tech, I met two former Ga. Southern football players. When asked about Paul Johnson, one started off with a very deep southern drawl “Listen, Paul Johnson’s an asshole….but he knows how to win.”

I need a one-a-day calendar of CPJ quotes.

You know, I came in this thread to bash Tech, then I realized I would still rather be told to get thicker skin after a loss than called an idiot for not being in the arena. I mean I’m kind of an idiot, but still.

Kudos, best stuff I’ve read in a while.

Regarding the #4 item above; Chaz Ramsey and Glenn Dorsey would wholeheartedly agree.

@4 one-a-day calendar:

January 22nd, 2010. Are you really that stupid?

“The guys who do the [TV announcing], they’re morons…I don’t worry about what they say”

No mention of slide rules and pocket protectors? Do you realize where CPJ works?

I appreciate where Johnson’s coming from here, but has he ever actually met his fan base? Unless some combination of sexual frustration and parental academic pressure improves fighting skills, this is generally not a group you want throwing haymakers. Just sayin’.

it’s all true.

last summer, i bumped my cart into coach johnson’s cart in the canned goods aisle at the howell mill kroger. without saying a word, he gave me a headbutt to the crotch and then proceeded to beat me into a coma with a can of bush’s country style baked beans.

you might think i’d hold a grudge, but strangely it just made me love him more.

No eye gouging?

I would have thought CPJ would have a lesson on getting that forefinger in there to rip out the optical nerve.

CA Dawg—See “Falling Down.” Contents under pressure with those engineers.

I can’t even imagine what would happen if he got to checkout and realized he forgot his Kroger Plus Card that day.

“…but nothing brings a man to involuntary prostration before the Lord like a solid boot to the baby baubles. "

Christ, Orson, you are the greatest writer since Richard Marcinko brought us ‘Seal Team Six.’

Common side effects of EDSBS include spit-takes, random eruptions of laughter, and face palm.

Biting, but only if you’re in a real pinch.

As a Georgia fan, I actually think his comments are hilarious. I used to love hearing his responses when Navy lost because he wasn’t afraid to call out anyone and everyone. I have a hard time not liking the guy and hope he’s able to find a school that isn’t such a breeding ground for whiners and losers before it swallows him alive.

Then again, maybe I just think it is funny because I’m not remotely afraid of being punched in the face by any Tech fans I know.

I would, however, like to see the comments from the Tech side were Richt (or, more likely, Erk Russell) to suggest that we all start beating on Tech fans. Methinks they wouldn’t have a very good sense of humor about it.

If it looks hard or sharp or heavy, it wants to be your friend.

That line doesn’t work nearly as well as you’d think. Ok, maybe it works exactly as well as you’d think.

And to back up Winfield @ 4, one of the most red-faced, screaming fits I’ve ever seen a football coach throw belonged to Paul Johnson. At a high school offensive lineman camp at Georgia Southern. Let’s just say that if you jump offsides around him and the worst that happens is that he asks if you’re stupid, consider it an off day.

I think it would be fine, as long as Richt said God bless afterwards.

Orson, that’s a fine point you make.

“2. Go for the nuts. No, it’s not pretty, but nothing brings a man to involuntary prostration before the Lord like a solid boot to the baby baubles. "

You sir, owe me one computer keyboard due to the fact that the coke in my mouth involuntarily sprayed my work area when I read that line….the monitor I can wipe down…The keyboard, well, let’s just say it’s down for the count…..

Tech Defense 101 and no mention of Lightsabers? Really?

Off switch for the leg. Great!

What’s Georgia done since 1980?

Does curb-stomping Tech year after year after year count?

If you grew up in Newland, NC, back in the 60s, you’d be just like CPJ. Back then, they had to pump sunshine in it was so remote.

I know Georgia fans will think Paul Johnson’s comments were directed towards them, but he was really giving it to whiney Tech fans…basically telling them/us to grow up. It’s great.

i don’t think theres that many UGA fans giving their boss a hard enough time that they’ll get punched in the face…at least not around christmas bonus time.

Yeah, go ahead. Punch Ben Jones in the face. And here’s a towel for ya: you’ll need it to wipe the tur and “gold” paint off your hand and the shit out of your drawers afterward.

I mean come on. If Tech’s defensive linemen weren’t men enough to punch some one the face effectively on the field, PJ can’t possibly think an EE student can do it, especially when he’s already suffering from a finals finals-related amphetamine hangover.

My boss went to Vandy, thank you very much.

Paul Johnson is like the son Howard Schnellenberger never had (or did he?)

This advice (while timely) would have been better introduced to the Yellow Jacket student body prior to the 2009/2010 academic year. Given the increasingly high number of student assaults by off-campus undesireables, CPJ would have a larger audience were he to teach a self-defense class.

Is that Barstoolio’s dog?

Paul Johnson once killed a man with nothing but a slaw dog and FO from The Varisty.

PS, would like to add that GT still was able to beat FSU when they had a healthy Christian Ponder for their first ever win in Tallahassee, so we got that going for us, which is nice.

The real problem here is that it seems that a good number of the GT fan base have forgotten what it feels like to lose…And the UGA fans have had to store up their celebrations, having very little use for them this year until now.

I absolutely LOVE how riled up this has the sidewalk fans of UGA currently. I love our coach and wouldn’t trade him for 100 Richts, Sabans, or Meyers…

10-2 in year two and the sky is still the limit.

Paul Johnson is very much like Ash from Army of Darkness. Just tons of one-liners that will shatter your soul. Or at least your nuts.

Good. Bad. I’m the guy with the nutshot.

1. said: I would, however, like to see the comments from the Tech side were Richt (or, more likely, Erk Russell) to suggest that we all start beating on Tech fans. Methinks they wouldn’t have a very good sense of humor about it.

Correct, because the mouthbreathing half of the Georgia fan base would take such statements literally and start throwing punches. For example, see comment #11.

I would suggest to the author that he add a statement at the end that the “comments” are a parody (with a definition link) for the benefit of the eventual barking horde that will be linked here. I’m guessing, however, that he’s already done the calculus and is now sitting back waiting for the fun to start.

Guy giving you a hard time at work, and you get tired of it, pray with him.

I wouldn’t trade him just because it’s nice to have an oversized personality in the ACC for a change. He’s endlessly entertaining to watch, just like the cro-mag offense.

The SEC is spoiled rotten by all the goofy coaches in the conference who produce a new absurdity for EDSBS each week. The other ACC coaches are like bland oatmeal.

Absolutely stunned that this video has not been brought up yet: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3K-mrlYG7Y

Someone mentioned the Howell Mill Kroger

Eek.

“Does curb-stomping Tech year after year after year count?”

According to what you u(sic)ga fans have said over the years: No, it doesnt.

Hey, you set the standard, dont criticize Johnson for using it.

@40 - Excellent. “Heel to the balls.”

POST OF THE YEAR

Maybe he assumes his fans will be in the World of Warcraft at the time?

The AJC never ceases to sink lower and lower in credibility. I wonder which journalism school they get their “talent” from.

@18- In all fairness, any jokes about getting beat up hit a far too close to home for most GT alums. I can understand why they wouldn’t find it funny.

To all the big talking Georgia fans, I saw three different fight Saturday night and the Georgia fans didn’t fare very well in any of them. I wish our Dline was as tough as some of the fans in the stands. (Morgan not included).

Good a Place as Any Dept:

Willie, Fabris, and Jancek will not be retained at season’s end.

Hate to see a guy lose a job, but the writing has been on the wall for over a year now…

@49

In fairness this is the first time in the last few home games(only ones I’ve been to) that gt fans actually outnumbered uga fans.

Everyone needs to have a look-see at this before they change it:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Johnson_(American_football_coach)

"Paul Johnson (born August 20, 1957(1957-08-20) in Newland, North Carolina), in possession of the largest set of balls that this world has ever seen, is the head coach of football at the Georgia Institute of Technology.1 "

Many a Harrumpgh to you, Mr. Swindle.

@52, I have never laughed so hard that I almost blacked out… You have now contributed a new experienceto my life…

Well done and well written.

“fair is for spring days, skin, and games of Candy Land”.
This was the official motto of what coach:
1) Jackie Sherrill
2) Bear Bryant
3) Danny Ford
4) all of the above

Thank you for playing…

This GT alum hasn’t met any UGA fan I couldn’t handle with ease personally. Including one poor UGA fool on my way back to the car after the game.