CURIOUS INDEX, 11/18/09

To which ethnic group is Marky M referring? Gravitation-American?

A playoff is just not right for college football.

He’d like to really believe that.

Oh, and someone needs to tell all the lower divisions they’re doing it wrong.

Thunderbird is great but me I prefer Mad Dog 20/20. Nothing says “I’m an ass grabber” like a bottle of “Bling Bling”. If you haven’t seen it you oughta look.

As for Mangino; who doesn’t want to strangulate parking attendants?

Great move Kansas, fire the one person who could make your program relevant and took you to an Orange Bowl. I’m sure plenty of guys are beating down the door to sign on as a second class citizen in a Lawrence town that still hates Roy Williams more than they like football.

I don’t care how old he is, seeing Switzer on a college sideline again would be pretty cool.

Considering how big of assholes most parking enforcement people are on college campuses, I think yelling at them is probably the least of what many individuals on campus would to do.

The LAWD has spoken to me: Switzer to FIU as the natural adversary of the Schnellenberger.

HOW FRIGGIN TITANICALLY FANTASTIC WOULD THAT BE?

We just have move Mario Cristobal to Virginia or Notre Dame or Kansas.

This has to happen. For the children.

Shut ‘er down! You can’t get any better today. Fuck it, I’m leaving work.

Switzer at Notre Dame? I’d make a Colonel Kurtz reference, but you know he’d be flamboyant in the 2 or 3 days he would last @ ND.

I’m with Mangino on the power trippin’ meter readers, though fortunately I’ve handled it a little better than the Massive One so far.

I would find the BCS and the NCAA significantly less irritating if they just came clean about the real reasons they don’t want a playoff:

1) They don’t give two shits about naming a champion
2) The BCS makes an absolute ass-load of money for all parties involved
3) The bowl system leads to lots of blowjobs from every good ol’ boy from Fresno to Framingham and they will be cold and in the ground before they voluntarily give up shooting off in a 19-year-old’s velvety throat.

Funny comment by Neuheisel, but I’m gonna go ahead and call him a poser for 2 reasons:

1) Night Train isn’t malt liquor, it’s a fortified wine
2) Night Train doesn’t come in a 40oz bottle – it’s a 750mL

Great move Kansas, fire the one person who could make your program relevant and took you to an Orange Bowl.

ONE?

/fuck

Those fat jokes are so lame…I apologize.

"You just don’t like talking to me because I’m ethnic . . . "

Unless “Spherical” is going to be added as an option under “race” in the 2010 Census, Mangino is about as “ethnic” as a sack of Krystals.

8 – Well, the NCAA is pretty forethright about not naming a champion. They are not affiliated with the BCS. (Not that they shouldn’t be disliked or hated. Bama fans, for example, have every right to burn their offices to the ground).

Straight from wikipedia:

“Mangino was hired to his current position in December 2001 weighing in at a modest 400 pounds at the time. With 50 victories, Mangino has the second-most victories in Kansas coaching history. To go along with his 50 victories, his weight has reached an enourmous 625 pounts (he has gained 4.5 pounds per KU win).”

In that sense, the losing streak and subsequent firing may add several years to the end of his life.

@6

Switzer vs Schnelly would be monumental. It’d be so spicy the Digital Viking would need to frisk them for turfman’s and pearl handled .22’s.

@10

Touche friend. Especially since there’s no way only one heart pumps enough blood to support his extremeties. Charlie Weis looks at Mangino and thinks “at least I don’t wear his size”

Granted Charlie’s fupa looks like something some 40ish Indiana mom got from making and eating decades worth of Rotel recipe suggestions.

That parking attendant had it coming. It was a loading zone. He was clearly a wide load, the sign just fell off.

Since it is rivalry week for me, fuck Michigan.

Protip for Mark: “Italian” hasn’t qualified as “ethnic” for at least 50 years now.

Thanks for the vine, Orson.

Amen @9, amen. Play Me a Song Mr. Neuheisel sounds like the closest he has been to fortified wine was the port and sherry list on the desert menu at the country club. Just like his namesake.

if you ain’t drinkin’ king cobra, you ain’t drinkin’ malt liquor.

night train? seriously, no one drinks “the train” straight. that’s suicide, man.

“But if you look at it through the prism of preserving the bowl system, fitting the academic calendar, you’ll come to the position that this is the best way to do it.”

Maybe the dumbest sentence I have ever read.

1) Why can’t we call the individual playoff games “bowls” and have them sponsored the same way? Wouldn’t that make the “playoff bowls” that much more interesting to CFB fans at large?

2) The existence of “playoff bowls” won’t make Non-BCS bowls any more meaningless than they already are. Those teams are already out of the championship picture in the current syetem. Will a playoff make them suddenly less watchable? CFB junkies and those affiliated with the participating teams are the only ones watching as it is, and they will still watch regardless.

3) Given the way other sports rape the academic calendar with week day games and travel as well as spanning multiple semesters, there is no defense in using that as an argument.

4) I still can’t figure out how anyone could make LESS money through INCREASING the appeal of four bowl games and decreasing none of them. Conferences share all the bowl money between teams anyway, so does it matter financially if one SEC team gets to play in three instead of three teams playing in one?

Good God…men will compete about anything. It’s amazing anything gets done in the world as all of you are consumed with establishing your ‘street cred’ on any number of topics.

Establishing “playoff bowls” would decrease the number of teams that get to go to a bowl. One team would play mutiple games instead of multiple teams playing one game. This is not difficult to grasp.

@20 I actually talked to the Rose Bowl reps at Gameday and they gave the generic “it will lessen the importance of other bowls” statement. They said that creating a playoff would basically create a NCAA Tourney vs. NIT type of scenario in football, in which no one gives a shit about the latter, which already happens. The real crux of their argument was fans, they came to Gameday in Fort Worth to see how the fans were, and if they thought we would travel. They don’t give a fuck if a championship gets named, its all about money, and its easier to sell-out one game.

That parking attendant had some courage to keep jousting with Mangino considering he was in danger of being eaten the whole time.

What’s the word? Thunderbird. What’s the price? Dollar twice.

You just gotta go with a drank that has it’s own rhyme. MD 20/20? Kid’s stuff.

Apparently Mangino is also a time traveler from the dawn of the 19th century, when a last name ending in a vowel was a distinguishing racial characteristic.

Clearly they’re playing with fire in Lawrence. A fat guy can get very, very passionate about parking. He’ll do whatever he has to do to avoid walking those extra 20 or 30 yards, and any laws that say otherwise are cordially invited to shut their pie holes. (Mmm…pie.)

And if he’s an “ethnic” fat guy to boot…hoo boy, batten down the hatches and hide the women and children and livestock! Those crazy ethnic people and their burning, broiling passion! (Mmm…broilers…)

….I started a bon-fire once with MD 20/20. Not sure any Malt Liquor could do that.

So wait… housepitaliano isn’t an ethnicity anymore? What’s that you say? It’s just some bullshit marketing move by Olive Garden? Shiiiiiit…

I’d like to formally retract my statement yesterday that this situation has anything to do with special treatment for Todd Reesing.

However, I’d like to formally NOT retract my statement suggesting that a lot of this is whining from a bunch of whiny players with terrible attitudes, until something substantiated is confirmed. And no, Rapey McDumbfuck Joc Crawford’s twitter doesn’t count.

All we know now is that Mangino apparently poked a kid (in pads) in the chest, and can be a big meanie at practice/on the sidelines. If that’s all it takes to get a BCS bowl and National Coach of the Year winner fired, then I might have to quit college football.

@22

Maybe I wasn’t clear. Confernces split bowl money up between all their schools equally – no matter who plays and who doesn’t. So for 2009, Vanderbilt will receive the same amount of bowl money as Florida. If UF plays in three bowls and two 6-6 sec teams get left at home, it makes no difference in cash flow to any school. Acutally it’s probably positive since the combined payouts from the three high profile UF games would add up to more than one high profile bowl + the Music City + the Independence.

@23

That is the only argument that makes any sense. Playoffs may have to be hosted by the higher seeded school so they could fill stadiums and avoid relying on whole fanbases traveling and paying for weeks on end.

Forget MD 20/20 go for Cisco. Not just any Cisco, but Cisco Red. Every other Cisco has a flavor but this one is just called “red.” You drink one of those you are the man/woman.

@ 21 It might even help you chillax a little

I’m a little late to the game today (damn life responsibilities). The money that everyone worries about for the bowls is not the individual bowl payouts. The money is how much the sponsors are willing to shell out for the whole college football system. There are only two 365 day a year sports in this country: college football and the NFL. I don’t know how the NFL stays relevant but people are still talking about who should have been national champion in 1990, 1991, 1997, Auburn’s undefeated season in 1999, whether Nebraska should have even been there in 2001, etc. That means that people are talking about college football ALL THE TIME. And it isn’t just fans, it’s the media, the coaches, and you better believe the advertisers. They aren’t dumping the millions during the CBS SEC 2:30 (3:30 ET) game if everybody believes that one school won the national championship. That’s because all of the casual fans are on the edge of their seats to see what the team that was talked about all offseason will do that day since the media have been talking about it since early January. At the end of the day, if Terry Bowden’s 1999 Auburn Tigers want their own championship rings and there are 1991 Washington Huskies National Champions T-shirts floating around out make you feel like college football is less exciting, less compelling, and somehow unrewarding, hey, college basketball just started. Remember, no one talks about basketball after the first weekend in April. And for all of its glory, at the end of every season, the media is blabbering about the fact that the weaker conference in the NFL should cede some of its playoff spots to the other. To wit, the 11-5 Patriots missed the playoffs last season. How’s that playoff system working out for you? The money goes beyond the bowls. It is a part of every weekend tilt from the first Saturday in September until the first weekend in January.

damn strong,

Points well made, but this Auburn fan has to correct you. AU was a long way from undefeated in 1999 – Tommy Tuberville’s first year. 6-5 I think.

AU went undefeated in 1993 under Tiny Terry Bowden, but was on probation. No one argues that they should have been in any NC game.

Tommy Tuberville’s AU team went undefeaded in 2004 and 1) having beaten 4 top-ten teams that year, would have been a much better matchup against USC than OU was and 2) should receive some sort of vindication if the NCAA would ever address the fact the Reggie Bush’s family was receiving benefits from a agent during his time at USC.

I know those horses have been dead a long long time, but I still can’t resist giving them a good flogging when I get the chance.

Question, who would bring more firepower: a Switzer football team or Navy?

No, not the Navy football team, I mean the whole NAVY? If you don’t include the Marines, I think the Switzer football team may edge us out.