OH, THE SCENT OF SCANDAL: TAPEGATE MARS TENNESSEE ALABAMA FRIENDLY
Little is dumber than the story of Spurrier pointing out Alabama using tape to mark kicks. In case you haven’t noticed, South Carolina’s been using tape to improve Stephen Garcia’s aim, as seen in this EXCLUSIVE AND NOT DOCTORED AT ALL PHOTO WE SWEAR.
How else would one explain a leap from a 53% to a 57% completion percentage? It must be magical tape. As if a rivalry priding itself on pure hate didn’t need an additional spark to create a proper trailer park bonfire. Saban says Tiffin won’t use the tape since risking a five yard penalty would be too much, but let’s focus on the most impressive possibility here: in theory, the same crew assigned to LSU/Georgia and Arkansas Florida could end up working this game, too. Crazy Old Testament God is just begging for this to happen.
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1
Grimey says:
So technically, the refs missed five calls in the Arkansas-Alabama game. Razorbacks just can’t catch a break.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:05 pm
2
EZ says:
Armageddon will seem like a game of Pom-Pom Pullaway if the refs have a hand in deciding the outcome of a Bama-Tennessee game.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:11 pm
3
JIMatUA says:
According to Saban, over half the teams in the league do something similar. South Carolina even did it last year. The refs are blowing calls all over the place. The only exception is Florida where Tebow just leaves his halo out on the field to mark the spot.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:13 pm
4
Bamaleg says:
I will echo what Jim said. There is an article on Al.Com which alludes to this state of affairs. Those who are interested may want to refer thereto. Obviously, the tape caused South Carolina’s offense to have an inordinately difficult time moving the ball against Bama’s defense.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:32 pm
5
Bamaleg says:
By the way, I want to congratulate EZ for his/her notable gift of understatement.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:34 pm
6
Tim James says:
Nick Saban said hearing this news was like finding out the second tower went down.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:35 pm
7
Jim Bob Cooter says:
How dare you suggest Tebow uses a halo to spot kicks? He would never do something so boorish; he simply uses his psychic Jebus powers to plant the spot into the mind of the kicker. That shizz is legal and divine.
This complaining about the refs business, while a time honored tradition, is getting super lame. It’s so boring I don’t even want to keep complaining about it. Instead, think about this: Firefox wants me to spell “honored” with a “u.” What is this, Communist Canada?
October 21st, 2009 at 2:35 pm
8
Pepper the Comeback Dolpin says:
Charlie Weiss would like to know more about this “decided schematic advantage”. Please send all info to my feeding tank.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:48 pm
9
Kevin@LSU says:
http://www.tigerdistrict.com/products/001-10092-1/Corn-Dog-Nation-T-Shirt.html?id=fVuvyWcp#blank
We’ve officially embraced your name-calling bama fans
October 21st, 2009 at 2:57 pm
10
San Gabrial Depravity says:
@Kevin@LSU
The “What’s a Teagle” shirt made me giggle in a most delightful manner. It perfectly illustrates the delightful land of imagination most AU fans were inhabiting for the first 5 weeks of the season.
Also: Fuck you Rocky Top,
Roll Motherfucking Tide.
October 21st, 2009 at 3:04 pm
11
sevenDs says:
Now if only my Tigers will schedule Xavier so the OL will know who to block.
October 21st, 2009 at 3:24 pm
12
BamaTaxMan says:
Kevin@LSU
Whoa, there. It was those confused War Eagle Tiger Plainsmen (Barners) that coined that name – everybody else just picked up on it.
October 21st, 2009 at 3:34 pm
13
der schatten says:
Google even thoughtfully fills in “Why is LSU [insert variant of corn dog here]” I just wish I knew where the hell it originated from?
October 21st, 2009 at 3:44 pm
14
Kevin@LSU says:
The ______ fans smell like corn dogs has it’s roots in the red river rivalry i believe.
October 21st, 2009 at 3:44 pm
15
Kevin@LSU says:
Barners, y’all are in for a treat because I have a great idea for a new tailgating entree.
Take a link of boudin, put a corndog stick in it and dip it on corndog batter and fry it. BOOM Cajun Corndogs!
October 21st, 2009 at 3:51 pm
16
bamalax07 says:
Maybe Spurrier should put tape in the corner of the endzone so that Garcia can hit the fade route.
October 21st, 2009 at 4:11 pm
17
mobilevol says:
@San Gabrial Depravity
Vols, Bitch!
October 21st, 2009 at 4:24 pm
18
PeterPumpkinhead says:
I’ve scanned the “Week 8 in SEC Football” release over on secsports.com and can’t find a referee listing, but over on tidesports.com there are a number of posts going nuts over the rumor that the crew from LSU/UGA and FL/ARK has in fact been assigned to the metalocalypse level hate fest which is the Bama/UT game.
October 21st, 2009 at 4:59 pm
19
douche lord says:
Document of Spurrier’s Complaints about Alabama
1. Marking place kicks with tape or other artifical substance.
2. Playing music to incite crowd prior to 3rd downs.
3. Aggressive, rough tackling by Alabama players resulting in gamecock player concussion and multiple other players being bruised and sore.
4. Cold weather at Bryant Denny stadium making it harder for gamecock receivers to catch ball.
5. Giving ball too frequently to Mark Ingram resulting in overabundance of rushing yards for Alabama.
6. Lack of restroom facilities on sideline causing South Carolina Headcoach to become grouchy and constipated… even more than usual.
7. Crowd cheered louder and more selectively for Alabama than for South Carolina hurting gamecock players feelings.
8. Discourteous pattern of lights displayed on scoreboard showing Alabama with more points than South Carolina at end of game.
October 21st, 2009 at 5:00 pm
20
Reilly says:
Bama playing fast and loose with the rules? This is not news.
October 21st, 2009 at 5:03 pm
21
Drake McHugh, Esq. says:
Word from al.com is that the crew from UGA/LSU and Arky/UF is suspended until Nov. 14.
October 21st, 2009 at 5:30 pm
22
Jalps says:
Looks like those COTG will stay unsummoned. Those refs have been suspended: http://www.gatorsports.com/article/20091021/articles/910219858
October 21st, 2009 at 5:31 pm
23
Crabapple Buck says:
Good move by the SEC for suspending this crew. I wish the Big Ten had the balls to do the same to their crews.
Just an FYI – Ohio State opponents are the least penalized of any in the NCAA. I have witnessed too many jerseys being stretched to believe that our opponents never hold. Especially when we have pass rushers that find their way into the NFL on a regular basis.
The answer is one that will never happen. Referees that have no conference affiliation. Then it would not matter in inter-sectional games which conference supplies the refs. They would come from the NCAA/CFA.
October 21st, 2009 at 6:08 pm
24
Mr. Pelican Pants says:
Nick Saban said Kiffen could wear the uni’s he would like, as long as they are pink, in honor of breast cancer, and have a bedazzled slogan on the back that reads:
“Bama’s Bitch since 2007″
October 21st, 2009 at 6:20 pm
25
PeterPumpkinhead says:
Drake and Jalps, I’m thrilled to hear that. Now we can have one of the other 3 or 4 really abysmal SEC officiating crews do the game.
Crabapple Buck, I’ve been saying for years we needed a national officiating body that mixed refs from all over into crews… of course that would involve the major conferences spending money, and they don’t do that… they just rake it in.
October 21st, 2009 at 8:58 pm