It’s fantastic that Stafon Johnson is now awake, signalling and communicating with his family, and faces a good prognosis for recovery after dropping a 275 pound weight on his neck in the USC weight room. For reference’s sake, that is a bulgy Phil Fulmer’s worth, a slimmed-down Friedgen, or Mark Dantonio after he’s swallowed his daily intake of pure leaden buckshot. (Vitamin buckshot: keeps you grounded, regular, and grim like Mark Dantonio should be.)

Happy thoughts to him, especially since he may now tell people for the rest of his life that he survived a potentially life-threatening incident “because of his muscular frame.” Yeah, baby. The pack of wolves would have gotten me, and did in fact bite half my penis off, but they died from bloat due to the huge meal. Thank god for garden hose caddies.

EDSBS Live goes late night tonight at 10 p.m. for a special late night edition. Why late night? Because we’ll be in Roswell interviewing birth coaches in the SWATS slangin’ that snow like we was Frosty in a blizzard. Hate the game, not the hustle, playa. Talk to you then.

[UPDATE] Showtime! Listen here; chat here.