YOU MUST NOT RECOGNIZE HIS RANK AND STATUS

by Orson on Sep 25, 2009 12:16 AM EDT

Q. What is Ray Lewis wearing in this scene from last night's Dr. Lou segment?

A. The uniform befitting one with the rank of Sergeant-at-Arms in the Imperial Guard of the Republic of Stabachussetts.

(HT: Doc Saturday.)

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Thank you, Orson….this will be haunting me in my dreams now.

by Charm Offensive on Sep 25, 2009 12:20 AM EDT reply actions

By now we’ve all seen the highlight of him breaking Darren Sproles in half on that fourth-down play last weekend. Lewis was later quoted as thinking to himself before the play, "I’m gonna kill this dude."

Uhhhhhhh, not a good choice of words there.

by JD on Sep 25, 2009 12:36 AM EDT reply actions

Ray Lewis has a razorblade stowed away underneath every metallic,,,pod,,,thing

by MightyMightyMitzu on Sep 25, 2009 1:38 AM EDT reply actions

He was auditioning for the role of Stabby McStabberson in the slasher film
“Switchblades of Glory: The Final Cut”

by Mr. Pelican Pants on Sep 25, 2009 2:01 AM EDT reply actions

I’ll say this about Ray Lewis, he must smell like Coco Butter Lotion, 24/7, or he sweats alot, ever since that Cribs episode, I refer to him as Shiny Ray Lewis, like he was dipped in a vat of lotion before the cameras got there.

by Mr. Pelican Pants on Sep 25, 2009 2:05 AM EDT reply actions

So, it’s NOT a vest made from Mark Mangino sized Cialis?

by Reformed Droog on Sep 25, 2009 2:10 AM EDT reply actions

Thursday night football. Where ranked teams go on the road to die

Though every week this season a top-5 (at the time of the game) team has lost

This week may offer a two-fer with Penn St on upset alert

Next week I am looking at you CAL.

by MJRuffalo1 on Sep 25, 2009 3:22 AM EDT reply actions

Stabachussetts is so beautiful this time of year.

by MrRedDevil on Sep 25, 2009 5:08 AM EDT reply actions

I’d like to think that Lewis is running around the streets of Bawlmer laying people out. Hence the hit vest.

by BurritoBrosShits on Sep 25, 2009 6:41 AM EDT reply actions

Can a republic have an Imperial Guard?

It can if it’s Stabachusetts.

by Nate on Sep 25, 2009 6:47 AM EDT reply actions

It’s his exoskeleton. It’s usually covered by his uniform, so we’re not used to seeing it.

by Sean Glennon's Jersey on Sep 25, 2009 7:12 AM EDT reply actions

Ole’ Ray Ray is reprising his bit role as a “smoker” from Water World. If you squint, and/or do a lot of serious drugs, Ray Lewis sorta looks like a black Dennis Hopper.

by cob on Sep 25, 2009 8:54 AM EDT reply actions

I didn’t kill no mother f***in’ lion. I don’t know who did it. We need to forget about that Simba s*** and focus on this Pittsburgh game. Okay, I saw a f***in’ wildebeest do something man.

by john on Sep 25, 2009 8:59 AM EDT reply actions

Lets be sure not to confuse Stabachusetts with Drugachusetts……

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TDpt9iicEow

by They Call me....Jevan Snead's Vagina on Sep 25, 2009 9:30 AM EDT reply actions

Its always so heartwarming to see how these men have benefited from the liberal arts education obtained from our nation’s institutions of higher learning.

by Colobama on Sep 25, 2009 9:33 AM EDT reply actions

15 – You have mistaken the University of Miami to be an “institution of higher learning.”

by cantcatchuf on Sep 25, 2009 10:13 AM EDT reply actions

It’s his game armor. In each of those individual shells, he keeps the souls of running backs. Zoom in and you can see they are all labeled….Eddie George, Corey Dillon, Fred Taylor, Jerome Bettis, ….and now, Darren Sproles.

by NestMinder on Sep 25, 2009 10:17 AM EDT reply actions

But they’re on the move! Creating oceans of knowledge! Donna Shalala talking!

by I'm A Lasagna Hog on Sep 25, 2009 10:19 AM EDT reply actions

It isalways so heartwarming to see how these men (Ray Lewis & OJ) have benefited from the criminal justice system.

In the OMG department….35 Gators are reported to have the flu – including Major Wright and Joe Haden…and who – might you ask – is Haden’s back-up? Wondy.

http://www.gainesville.com/article/20090924/ARTICLES/909249899/0/opinion

by hobeg8r on Sep 25, 2009 10:21 AM EDT reply actions