EDSBS LIVE! WORK TO DO EDITION

And may have velociraptors living in it?

Not seeing the problem here…

Just exactly how much time do you have??? This could take awhile…..

1. I think I know that our offense is unspectacular and our defense is going to be quite good once we’re playing real football teams. I’ll know more after we get fisted by Cal this Saturday. I do know this is the best linebacking corps at Minnesota I’ve ever seen. (By saying that, I just condemned one of them to death from ebola, one will drown saving a puppy from the Mississippi River, and the other will die saving kittens from a fire.)

2. Michigan.

3. Biased: Nate Triplett. He’s been popping eyes and opponents at an impressive rate. Unbiased: Michael Floyd. Poor guy has to play for Charlie Weis. What a waste of talent.

4. Laundry. I’m down to 3 pairs of boxers and a Jim Wacker Football Camp t-shirt. I may be time to start a load before EDSBS LIVE! But…I could watch a game from my DVR instead. I think I’ll do that. I haven’t watched Iowa-Iowa St. yet.

re: #3 WSR…

I may be a homer when it comes to the Fighting Irish, but I’m not sure you can consider Weis’ use of Michael Floyd as a waste of talent. Two games into this season:

Receiving Rec Yds TD Long
-—————————————————————-
Nevada 4 189 3 88
@ Michigan 7 131 1 37

Average 5.5 160 2

Also, factor in that Floyd was injured during the last 6+ minutes of the Michigan game. What else do you want the man to do??

1) I know that a Week Two bye week is unacceptable. You get me all worked up with a whipping of a 1-AA school and then you don’t call back and leave me with conference game blue balls for two weeks? So, basically, I know shit except that Mallett is a big boy and has a big arm. And the defense is likely still not very good.

2) As an Arkansas fan, I’m forced to deny your wishes and stick with Ole Miss in this spot. Although, I’m thinking LSU could also be an acceptable answer here.

3) My fourth year of LeFevour Love has only been intensified after what happened on Saturday.

4) I need to work on teaching my dogs to be better football fans and stop demanding to do things like “walks” and “pooping outside” on a perfectly nice Saturday afternoon in the basement. USE THIS TOILET AND BE A BETTER FAN OR YOU ARE GOING BACK ON THE OL’ ROY AND NOT THIS FANCY HIPPIE ORGANIC SHIT YOU GET TO EAT NOW!

Geaux, I’m not questioning what Floyd’s been doing in terms of production. I’m calling Weis a piece of shit.

By eye-popping, do you mean someone OTHER than LeGarrett Blount?

I actually really do need to mow my lawn pretty badly after that trip to Gainesville. EDSBS cuts to the core of me.

1) Michigan alum, so: Our secondary is about as “good” as I expected it to be, Notre Dame exposed that. However Notre Dame has one of the best passing attacks we’re likely to face all season and we managed to sneak out a win so we might be okay for this season, but if we face a good passing team in a Bowl we’re toast. On the offensive side, Forcier is a god and should be worshipped as such. I can see light. We’re going to be a decent team this year, not a powerhouse or elite, but better than a lot of teams out there, and next year things should only get better.

2) We don’t deserve #25, but BYU is oh so terribly overrated. A one point win over OK, when the entire second half they faced some guy who wasn’t even planning on playing that day instead of Bradford. Weak win and BYYU does not deserve the praise they got for that win.

3) Denard and Tate, the multiheaded QB animal that devours the defenses of the hated Irish (and Western who we really don’t hate).

4) I really need to clean the bathroom. I’ve been supposed to do it for the past two weekends.

1. I know that Notre Dame literally can not give away a scholarship to someone who can kick a stationary
football into the opposing team’s endzone. I don’t know if this says more about the football team or the
soccer team.

2. Penn State. When your out-of-conference schedule is Akron, Syracuse, Temple-Who-Lost-To-Villanova,
and Eastern Illinois, there’s no way to be anything but criminally overrated.

3. Blatant homerism here, but Michael Floyd is simply amazing. We must begin cloning him now. I also have
a suspicion that Tate Forcier is going to torture ND for years to come.

4. Dangerous question, lots of answers. I think I’m supposed to be working on applications, but they’re not due
until March when we’re in the deepest, darkest part of basketball season, so it’s fine.

#9

With Bradford in for a half, Oklahoma scored 7 points. Without Bradford for a half, they scored 6 points.

BYU was doing just fine against Bradford and they are being a bit unfairly maligned for his injury.

They beat the #3 team in what was basically a road game. That defines “strong win.”

1. I know we have a good defense. A really good defense.

2. LSU: That is not a top-10 team, 15 or so ok.

3. From my team, Jurrell Casey, best player on the field for USC 2 weeks in a row, from the reast of the CFB world have to with Tate Forcier

4. What is this work you speak of during football season?

bonus I need my offense back. I need mutiple formations with shifting and motion to get the defense on their heels. I need to see us come out with 2 wide out. our TE McCoy flexed outside, Joe McKnight in the slot and Bradford int he backfield. If the defense stays in base personell, then fine we kill them with mismatches in the passing game. If they bring in more DB’s then shift the TE down, put McKnight in the I and rown downhill at them. We need to put the fear of god into these defensvie coordiantors.

3. Biased. Jerrard Tarrant, GT corner and punt returner extraordinaire. Two TD returns in as many weeks, 42-yard average with pretty much the same blockers who led one of the worst return units in the country last year. Plays a decent corner, too.

Spent last year fighting false rape charge (eventually dropped). Accusation was that he went down on a girl who didn’t want him too, after they’d been doin’ some semi-nekkid making out that she was down with. Really. He went to jail for that.

Oh and….

1. Oregon Fan. The only thing I really know for certain is that Jeremiah Masoli is tough as nails, but also very very short. For him to throw over the middle the Ducks either have to move the pocket or have the offensive line cut block. This strikes me as a sad limitation. As insult to injury, our best receiver is the tight end and he isn’t seeing the ball much in the middle of the field.

2. Glancing at the rankings Ole Miss sure looks way too high. Also, Utah is too high. They aren’t the same team that pantsed Bama last year. And I suppose thirdly that LSU got outgained by 150 yards against a team that was on a something like 14 game losing streak. How they did that and were able to stay in the top ten amazes me.

3. LeGarrette Blount right hand is pretty eye popping. For excellence during actual games I would have to go with UCLA’s Raheem Moore. He has 5 interceptions so far. And not only that, he had a 6th against the almighty pick machine Crompton5000 called back. I don’t care if he was able to feast on San Diego St. and Tenn, that is a LOT of picks in two games.

4. Pay attention to the girlfriend. Two weeks in and she is already dreading Saturdays.

1. Auburn. We can score and move the ball, even if it’s just against the likes of LA Tech and MSU. Unlike the abortion of an offense the Tigers had in 2008, we’ve got some guns and a wild man at OC this year; Gus ‘The Pinball Wizard’ Malzahn. Expect the scoreboard to light up with bonus plays and extra balls for most of the season.
2. The entire ACC. North Carolina manages only 35 yards on the ground and needs a safety to bean UConn? And this is supposed to be the #19 team in the nation?
3. The two-headed running back combo at Auburn named Ontereo MacCalebb/Ben Tate. They’ve accounted for over 500 yards in only two games and are setting records as fast as they can write them down, even some held by some guy named ‘Bo’.
4. Have got to stop the silly miscues – fumbles, dropped punts, poor special teams coverage, penalties. Most SEC teams tend to be unmerciful about such things.

1. ‘Bama- The good: the defensive line is everything it was cracked up to be in the pre-season. More sacks, hurries, hits…plus stuffing the run. The bad: our secondary is long on experience but short on talent…we’ll give up at least one long (40 yards +) pass completion per game.

2. I’ll go with Miami….I think they’re in for a tragic stretch of a season

3. Default Homer Answer: Mark Ingram. I really didn’t expect as much production from him as he’s giving…quite a difference from year 1 to year 2.

4. The fucking yard. I’ve been traveling during the week, and every time I get home there’s a thunderstorm. I give it one more week until my neighbors are hanging me in effigy…

1)Playing two shitty non-conference schools in a row makes for some boring-ass TV.

2) Georgia. Because they fucking suck BALLLS.

3)Riley Cooper. God knows how long its going to last, but I hope someone is taping his reps.

4)LAW SCHOOL. Seriously, don’t go to law school, no matter what the Swindle says. I think my section is united with the singular thought that we’ve made an Arrested Development-esque “I’ve made a huge mistake” – mistake. I don’t think I’ve read more in a single month than I’ve ever read in a year of undergrad, and considering that I went to a pretty decent school cough#17inthenationcoughcough I’d thought I was prepared. FUCK and NO. Coupled with the fact that I have a problem with college football…. Yeah, anyone need a marijuana/personal injury/ambulance chaser in three years? Call me baby!

BurritoBros:

At present I am directly disregarding your advice in #4. LSAT next weekend. It’s a good idea, trust me.

1. I know that VT can really run the football. I’m becoming less of a fan of Tyrod Taylor. Defense will be good once it works out some of the inexperience at LB. Jayron Hosley is the real deal as a punt returner. He’s going to be special.

2. Georgia Tech. Everyone is picking them to win the ACC this year and they are looking tepid at best.

3. Going to be a homer here but Ryan Williams. Had a decent game against Alabama. Was unstoppable last week.

4,. Fucking everything, the yard, the garage, the chicken coop (suppose to build one this fall), the swimming pool, my cars, my office, my kids, my wife …. Everything. Eh, who cares, it can all wait.

1. Do you know anything about your team after two weeks?
BAMA- If you are a conventional running team, you will get your feelings hurt trying to run on us. If you can throw more than 40 yrds or basic dig routes, you can even it out on us since Sabans secondary must have a billion diff configurations our DB’s cant seem to figure out and blow coverages at least 3 times or more per game at crucial times.(You know who you are.)Just watch the Utah game, rinse, repeat. BAM! we will be behind.

2. Who is already tragically overrated? USC. Maybe Matt Barkley is the next coming of Elway, and is 12 yrs old and one yr removed from his last Boy Scout meeting, but if he is injured and forces Pete to swap QB’s, we can see how that worked with LSU last year,plus last years team layed an egg via Oregon State, someone will get them. My guess is UCLA.

3. Name an eye-popping player from the first two weeks of the season. Someone who has caught your eye, or someone who pops the eyes from the skulls of opposing players.
Two words: Marcel Dareus, he is the next All World def player to emerge this yr, like Cody did last year. Runner up would be Trent Richardson-aka-Bootleg Emmit Smith.

4. What work do you have to do?
Orson, once you get 3 kids and soccer after work, and pile football on every weekend, I could hire a truckload of Latino’s from the 7/11 and work em from dusk til dawn for 2 weeks straight landscaping my yard and not get caught up. I’m gonna slash and burn it like the Amazon and displace some tribes, but they will have to get the hell over it.

1. That we scored 24 against Aubarn. And 45, despite being against Jackson State. At least we have a semblance of an offense in Starksville.
2. Fuck Ole Pi$$. I’m still going w/ them.
3. The MacCalebb kid from Aubarn. Wow.
4. Monster brush pile in side yard. Hidden from street view. The deer love it. So, honey pie does too. She bought deer corn Saturday and sed to leave it alone. No flying dinosaurs yet but a possum or three is a possibility.

1. SMU Fan (yes, we do exist, but mostly in captivity). All I know is that SMU is 2-0, and has a legitimate possibility to be 3-0 for the first time since 1984, the last time it went to a bowl game. If June Jones’ old team could beat Wazzu, perhaps his current team can too. I don’t care how unimpressive our wins are. For us, a win, is a win, is a win.

2. TCU. Always overrated.

3. SMU Secondary. One of our weakest units the past few years already has 9 interceptions in the first 2 games. Sure, they still give up a lot of yards, but actually seem to have figured out how to be in the right place at the right time when it counts the most. Also, Shawnbrey McNeal, our runningback transfer from Miami who was cleared to play this year less than 24 hours before our first game, and then ran for 158 yards the next day.

4. Now if our 3-named QB Bo Levi Mitchell could just please stop throwing the ball back to the guys in the other jerseys, then we’d really have something. Turnovers have been responsible for about half of the points against. I’m still not convinced he’s the guy to take us to the promised land (which for SMU just means a goddamned winning season), but hopefully he’ll prove me wrong and stop overthrowing his receivers on a regular basis.

Obviously, re Question #4, I interpreted the “you” to mean “we” to mean the “team.” As for what work I personally have to do, alas, I’ve spent the last week and half settling one cases and preparing a motion in another. My office looks like a paper truck blew up.

1. UCLA is getting better under Skippy. Better athletes and more of them. Very young team went into Neyland and acted like they belonged. Disciplined and physical. Huge win for a program trying to rebuild.

2. Wouldn’t say that USC Is overrated; as usual they have more stud athletes than anybody and Pete Carroll remains his usual tweeting n’ competing self. But I would say that this Trojans squad has a much slimmer margin for error than previous editions. I think the Pac-10 is on the upswing, and I’m not convinced they’ll go undefeated. Outside the league, I’d say Penn State is overrated. Should any Big Ten team be rated in the Top 5?

3. Love the shout out to Rahim Moore, #14. And he should have 6 picks, one was stolen by an SEC official on a horseshit offsides call at the end of the game.

I’m going to stay in the Pac-10 and give Jake Locker some love. Almost forgot about him after last year’s injury and the horror of Ty Willingham’s 0-12 death march. Dude is a flat out baller. U-Dub is gonna be a tough out in the Pac-10 if he stays healthy. Next up: USC.

Honorable mention: I warned several Sooners not to sleep on Max Hall and BYU. UCLA played them three times in the last couple of years and the Cougars are easily the most physical team we’ve played this decade, and that includes USC. BYU just punches you in the mouth on every single play.

4. Nuthin’, son. Sold a pitch on Friday, which allowed me to spend this weekend throwing around my future earnings like a bunch of drunken jarheads hitting the beach at Subic Bay.

1) The only two things I can say with any certainty about Cal two games into the season: One, this squad is up there with the 2004, shoulda-been-in-the-Rose-Bowl squad in terms of offensive productive — probably better. And that squad had a 2,000+ yard rusher and a 2,500+ yard, 150+ rated QB in Aaron Rodgers. And two, as far as I can see, their killer instincts on defense are improving from previous years. Better production from the LB corps and better shut-down on scoring. Ball-hawkishness probably won’t compare from last year for turnovers, but that might be asking much.

2) Want to say Ole Miss, but I think they might be able to compete with Alabama. Who knows with Houston Nutt? But in terms of flat out “WTF?” quality: LSU. They give up massive yardage to Washington and have a much more competitive game versus Vandy AT BATON ROUGE? No. No no no. Give ’em 20th and let them prove otherwise. Also applicable? Any team from the ACC, excluding Miami, GT, or Clemson.

3) Jahvid Best. Need I say much else? As good as advertised.

4) I need to find a job. Nothing like college football to keep one busy when unemployed.

#20. I’ll agree with you USC is overrated, perhaps majorily so given their QB situation. However I feel they deserve to be where they are, if not higher, simply for putting a home and home with tOSU on their schedule instead of playing creampuff after creampuff.

As a Michigan alum I have a lot of reasons to hate USC and tOSU, but I have to give them props for their scheduling. tOSU has Texas and USC home and homes to its credit, USC has shown it is willing to travel into SEC country and play. I want to see that kind of scheduling rewarded by the voters to encourage more big name regular season games and less of this Big School vs Random Hobos Gathered Up An Hour Before Gametime stuff.

1. What I learned: Smart Football is paying off, because observing both Florida and Georgia Tech has shown me the value of a gameplan and playcalling. Florida plays a couple soft formations against Charleston Southern all game and they gain 330 yards. Let a little more out of the bag and Troy only gains 140. Clemson stuffs Georgia Tech for 30 minutes until they finally start calling some run counters and put together two drives. Are you paying attention, Sweatervest?

3. For the literal eye-popping category, Riley Cooper gets it for his bizarrely intense, helmetless rage while blocking a Troy defensive back into the ground on a Florida TD run, followed by some hyped up trash talk. I believe he might’ve been a freshman, too. Poor kid.

Speaking of helmets, does anyone else notice they seem to be popping off a lot more this year? Hopefully it’ll set up some great photos like Earl Everrett sacking Troy Smith in 2006.

1. Bama: If they are only up by 7 at the half against North Texas, I predict Saban’s halftime speech will consist of icy cold stares into the depth of his soul…..if he had a soul
Seriously though, I feel that with the offense not exactly “clicking” (getting the lead in the 3rd vs. Fla. Intl is not “clicking”, they are due for a loss this year against an inferior opponent (sidenote: as a Bama fan, ALL opponents are inferior…don’t Hate, I’m on my 3rd Beam and gingerale…)
which would be…..Ole Miss. Why? B/c they have the giggity factor.

2. I will say Miami, only because I loathe Miami. Yep. Got no reason other than that. Fuck ’em
(I would say Michigan, but I am watching Red Dawn right now and am feeling something vaguely like “goodwill” towards them)

3. Crompton. Wait, did you mean “eye-poppingly” in a positive or negative way?

4. Grad school, my fiance, and soccer, but not in any particular order

watching Point Break after Red Dawn……it’s a Swayze Xmas in the ’Anta tonight!

1. LSU — What I have learned about LSU is that I have yet to see anything remarkable in order to make a rational judgment. Our best games are ahead of us. If I had to compare LSU to another school it would be Ohio State. We have a shit-ton of talent but Les Miles has yet to pull the trigger. We are playing VERY conservative ball and it seems like we’re still adjusting to Chavis and his new defense. Offensively, Jordan Jefferson is looking like the anti Jarrett Lee which maybe be a bad thing. While Jarrett Lee was afraid to get hit and often threw the ball up for grabs in order to avoid the hit, Jefferson checks off down field receivers and opts for the sack or the short route way too much. Either run the ball or get rid of it. Also, his arm is not as good as Lee’s. I want to see if Lee has progressed from last year After all, he is the “veteran” of the group. LSU has the youngest QB corps in the league so Miles might be a little protective but once the big dogs come to play, they’ll all have to grow up and play some damn football. Punting is a big problem as well.

2. I have yet to see a real dominating team outside of Florida and who have they played? LSU is overrated yes, but not so overrated that it’s offensive. Penn State seem a little high up there and of course, Ole Miss is good but they can choke. USC is overrated but we’ll see.

3. Homer pick. Patrick Peterson has been all over the field so far early in the year. Hopefully the rest of the team follows his lead.

4. Productivity at work went down and the girlfriend is hurting for some attention especially since she has the flu. First weekend of football I was non-existent and last weekend, spent all day on campus while she stayed home and babysat but that was her problem.

1. - Cal’s passing game has improved
2. - Masoli – you truck a couple players on a weak Oklahoma State defense and suddenly you’re a fringe heisman candidate? No way, no how!
3. - Jahvid Best – He just gets better and better
4. - This time of year college football is my work

1. I am totally clueless. The Dawgs could be anywhere from astoundingly mediocre to pleasantly surprising. We could find out if we are the first one as early as this week, but we won’t find out if we are the second one for a long time….only because everyone we play is mediocre and/or inconsistent until some team we play on some neutral field…can’t remember who right now. I hear their QB is going to walk to the game across the St. John’s River, though…that should be cool

2. Tennessee’s coaching staff besides Monte.

3. Branden Smith…he made Stephon Gilmore look like he was some walk on in the speed department. Sure, there has been some eye opening stuff on the negative side too, but CMR says that’s all Shaun Chapas’ fault. :roll eyes:

4. Yeah. Like I do anything the rest of the year!

1. UConn- Not only has Randy Edsall never called a single offensive play in a decade (his words), but he’s apparently never recruited a QB since Orlovsky or a single Wide Reciever. Ever. He’s handcuffed Joe Morehead and the passing game, which was, I think, 112th last year is even worse. It’s 116th. Army is behind them, but they don’t really count. So they’re 117th. Fuck.

2. UNC (small stage) and Oklahoma State (big state shitshow).

3. I say this with FULL KNOWLEDGE that it’s UConn and not a big scool, but bear with me. Lindsay Witten. The kid has blown apart FBS lines in his first 2 games (one of the few schools yet to play an FCS, so it matters) with 5 sacks and general mayhem. Here is why I put in the qualifier…it reminds me as a Giants fan of Osi coming back after Tuck blew up the last 2 years. I always thought Witten was a nice compliment to a far superior LB in Scott Lutrus. I was wrong. He is equally beastly.

4. There are things sitting around my house. Items. The lack of stench makes this acceptable, and will continue to do so until next May.

Remember, I root for a basketball school.

1. No… there’s only one team in the country right now which doesn’t have a problem/weakness and that appears to be Florida. Michigan doesn’t have a secondary. S Carolina & Georgia have ACC-like offenses. Will we really know how good Boise State or BYU is? ND looks mediorce becuase their genius coach does’t look so genius when he cannot steal the other team’s signals. The University of Ohio State’s QB could hit the broadside of a barn — from inside the freaking barn. But hey, everyone has that problem right? Kinda like killing and stealing… everyone does it.

#2. North Carolina

#3. Central Michigan’s QB.

#4. I said fuck it to my list cause I’ll never get it all done anyway.

1. Do you know anything about your team after two weeks? UF- they have talent. lots of it. but, playing cupcakes is just too easy. I still have this gut feeling that the smooth, thoughtless execution isn’t there. Something hasn’t gelled yet- and maybe it just wouldn’t until they play SEC opponents. I know Tebow is throwing better than he ever has…still a bit too hubristic on some decisions for my comfort level (several passes I have seen would be picks with other opponents). Still, have seen some spirals with the targeting of a missile. whoa.

2. Who is already tragically overrated? I think i have to go with USC, and the freshman Ken Doll worship. With the exception of McKnight, I didn’t see anything displayed that couldn’t be beaten with better coaching and play calling (ahem, sweater vest! they played their hearts out for you- help em out)

3. Name an eye-popping player from the first two weeks of the season. This is tough…maybe in two more weeks I would have one player immediately pop up. given the schedule, would say Riley Cooper. i know- Gator bias (focus?) but, he’s so competitive. Cooper patting James on the ass and outrunning him into the endzone? He’s tall, good hands, and just crazed with competitive spirit- winding himself and yacking all over the field. Go on jack rabbit! the season will see what he does, but I think he’ll be talked about a lot more by the Georgia game. ESPN profiles, Tebow’s roomie, blah blah blah. Also- Max Hall, and i’m chagrined to admit it- but there’s a little mormon guy who’s reading defenses well.

4. What work do you have to do? my back “yard” is sure to be photographed for the cover of Trailer Trash Home & Garden, any day now… privacy fence+non-discriminating Lab mutts+college football season=lazy ass who keeps applying the Jerry Springer dot to the vista. Not sure whether to weedwhack, then mow- or just bust out the machete to get going. oops.

1. Do you know anything about your team after two weeks?
Tate Forcier is quite possibly the savior of Michigan Football from going into a nosedive like Nebraska. He has an uncanny ability of making THE right read and playing the right play every snap. When you have around 65% accuracy, the opponents will have to respect your throws and it opens physical backs like Minor to gain some good yards.

Defense is thin/average but not horrible. We will struggle against solid pass blocking lines, accurate QB and great WRs but hey.. any team is going to struggle.

I also don’t think we deserve a top 25 rating yet and guessing we’ll be frustrated either @iowa or @illinois or both. But my surprise pick is we win against PSU.

2. Who is already tragically overrated?
PSU… cupcakes. They apparently can’t run well. And they’ve replaced all WRs. They don’t deserve #5 ranking at all.

3. Name an eye-popping player from the first two weeks of the season.
Homer : Tate Forcier
Non-homer : Michael Floyd. He’s a beast and reminds me of Braylon. He’s just a sophomore though. Other teams facing ND, you better double-cover Floyd and Golden and hope that the underneath stuff don’t work out and the runs can be stuffed. Slow death might be better than quick death. More snaps and more chances of a turnover or 3 and out.

4. What work do you have to do?
Fucking crab-grass. I hate you.

1. Well, we finally have a starting QB (or at least should). Nichol may be more of a threat running the ball (a la Crazy Legs Stanton), but Cousins can actually, you know, throw the ball in the general area of the receiver. Other than that … not much. Too early to tell whether last week’s EPIC FOOTGUN means the return of “Same Old Spartans” or was just a fluke.

2. Matt Barkley. Any idiot can hand off to McKnight all day on the key drive and look good doing it. (Teamwise: Hard to say. I want to say Notre Dame or Michigan, but I suspect both are pretty decent teams that are close to properly rated now but will be horribly overrated at some point.)

3. That little bastard who kept making ridiculous one-handed catches against us from CMU. Can’t remember the name.

4. My thesis (although that’s less neglect and more rueful discovery of the 90-90 Rule: the first 90% of any project takes 90% of the time; the remaining 10% takes the other 90% of the time).

1. South Florida – I know we can soundly beat a good I-AA team and the worst I-A team in existence even when playing mediocre football. And that their game at FSU on the 26th is a must-win… for the Seminoles. Over us, of all teams.

2. Gotta go with USC. As soon as the Barkley/Elway comparisons started coming in from hyperventilating “national” columnists, I knew this had gone too far. Can’t count on the other team coaching itself right out of the game every time. Tedford’s going to tear that shit up.

3. Lindsey Lamar, who has gotten a lot of burn at running back for USF in the first two games. He’s probably the fastest player we’ve ever had. You only need a little bit of that ESS EEE CEE speed in the Big East to scare the hell out of everyone (see: Devine, Noel).

4. Well, I ran out of shirts to wear to work and I almost missed paying some bills, and I need to shut down the old computer forever and sell off the desk and put together the new, smaller one, and on Saturday I was supposed to get some office work done but I reached a point right around the time Central Michigan recovered the onside kick where I decided “fuck this, I’m watching footbal, I’ve done enough this week”.

1. Do you know anything about your team after two weeks?
    Arkansas – We have hope and know that we actually are on the way to a good passing game..

2. Who is already tragically overrated?
      I’ll say Iowa was and Kansas currently is.

3. Name an eye-popping player from the first two weeks of the season.
    Case Keenum, QB Houston. Blaine Gabbert QB Missouri.

4. What work do you have to do?
     Get some Velociraptors and hire a younger Robert Muldoon type as game warden.

1. Do you know anything about your team after two weeks?

Miami University . . . has . . . not . . . scored. And, at this point, it’s easy enough to imagine them getting shut out for the season. (Current running total: 90-0 against.) Our new coaching staff appears to be destroying the village in order to save it.

2. Who is already tragically overrated?

Manchester United. (Sorry, I’m traveling in Europe this week and getting wall-to-wall Champions League coverage.)

3. Name an eye-popping player from the first two weeks of the season. Someone who has caught your eye, or someone who pops the eyes from the skulls of opposing players. Either one is acceptable.

Brandon Minor. I had no idea Michigan had anyone that fast. Then again, perhaps it was just by comparison to the Notre Dame defense.

4. What work do you have to do? More specifically, what have you been neglecting thanks to football season? I.e., your yard, which is nearing impenetrable jungle, and may have to cut down in a controlled burn? And may have velociraptors living in it?

My storage shed — and, hell, most of the back yard — looks like the ass-end of Sutpen’s Hundred. The shed needs to be razed and replaced, but I think that’ll wait until spring.

1: WVU. Offense is better and more multiple. Defense, despite experience, still finding its character.
2. Take your pick — the ACC or the Big Can’t Count. Big XII also finding ways to suck more than expected.
3. Jarrett Brown — who knew it was legal to throw the football so well.
4. My whiteboard is littered with projects, and so is my honey-do list.

From a GT perspective,

1. Don’t know much other than we have a punt returner and Coach Johnson is very unsatisfied with the execution by his offense the first coupel of weeks.

2. The ACC is very mediocre, as are the Big East and Big 10. Anybody in the SEC East not named FL.

3. Homer pick here but Jerrad Tarrant – GT CB and Punt returner. Two weeks, 2 punt return TD’s and a national leading 42 yds per punt return. He is very quickly going to change how teams punt to GT.

4. Not much yet, not enough good games yet. Mostly crap contests against lower division opponents.

Have you seen Georgia this year? I have no freakin’ clue. 10 points versus soft Okie State defense. 41 versus tough South Carolina defense. Okie State Big 12 offense needs turnovers to score. Crapulent Garcia looks like Heisman candidate. WTF? I guess the one thing I know is that we’re not going to stick to one RB and lean on the OL as much as we probably should.

Penn State. But they’ll likely end up in the top ten anyway because they’ve got one real test and it’s a home game. Relatedly, it’d be nice to see Florida play somebody. Right now, there doesn’t look to be a better than good team on their schedule.

Graig Cooper and Trent Richardson. Studs. On the home team: After getting pilloried for undisciplined play last year – especially in the Tech game – Reshad Jones is laying the wood to opponents (and getting the evil eye from officials on his clean, but devastating hits). Our pass defense may be soft, but it’s comforting to see a Georgia safety slobberknocking opponents again. Oh, and Brandon Boykin. He had a pick and a 100 yard kick-off return for a touchdown versus South Carolina.

My reading, my horses, my job… yeah. All living in the shadows of my addiction. I need help. Luckily, I married a fellow addict. And we’re not totally neglecting the 7 month old newbie to the home.

1. UF—The fears of falling asleep somewhere in the middle of the season are more real than we’d like to admit. We’re not playing particularly solid football, and the rest of SEC East seems to have made a pact to set every game up as trap bait.

2. Something in me says BYU (This Gal’s is both Mormon and bitchy lately).

3. I thought Greg Paulus would suck even for Syracuse. He just kind of regular sucks.

4. Sleep.

1. USC is competing for a NC. There, I said it.

2. Any team that is ranked that has scheduled a non-Div 1-A team because they don’t have sack. If these teams are composed of players that you would never give a scholarship then what are you doing competing with them. They are definitely overrated when one of these doormats scores a touchdown.

3. Tate Forcier; what? we don’t get credit for giving the right answers on this thing?

4. Printing tickets

1. Do you know anything about your team after two weeks? Yes, one of two things. ND ends the season sucessfully at 10-2, or becomes an abysmal failure at 6-6 yet again. I refuse to venture a guess either way, but a loss to Sparty this weekend will do wonders for my prognostication skills for the latter.

2. Who is already tragically overrated? Ohio State – 11 is too high for them at this point. Tresellball will eventually lead to a self-destruction in Columbus, but not until he lays an ass-whooping on Michigan again.

3. Name an eye-popping player from the first two weeks of the season. Yes, homerism here, but even non-ND fans (and ND haters) have admitted that Michael Floyd is the real deal – he is the reason we have 1,000 yards and 7 thrown TD’s in 2 games, and that includes sitting the last 6 minutes against Michigan with a lacerated knee.

4. What work do you have to do? My neighbor has already complained twice this week about the tall grass – and I have had three people mistaken me for having a yard sale. As for a job that actually pays me, I refuse to admit to anyone that I read this blog while at the office, for fear that some others may read this.