THE GINGER NINJA REMAINS ONE STEP AHEAD OF YOU
The Ginger Ninja confuses his opponents in endless ways! First, he is out with an arm injury…BUT THEN HEALS MIRACULOUSLY THANKS TO POOR SOURCING AND NINJA POWDERS!!! He is playing Samurai Chess while you click away at your pathetic Chinese Checkers. He laughs like the butterfly inches above the reach of the hungry snow monkey, forever fluttering out of your crude grasp. HAHAHAHAHAH!!
/applies eight layers of sunscreen
/underthrows deep ball to A.J. Green by five yards
Keep guessing, fools, for the Ginger Ninja is forever ahead and behind you, watching with an invisible eye and an arsenal of cunning. Now, watch as he disappears in a cloud of mysterious NINJA SMOKE!
/walks off screen muttering profanities to self
(Yup: the Ninja will be in the building Saturday as starter.)
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1
pic6bamr says:
Guess I can’t comment since I’ve never been a ninja nor Ginger
September 10th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
2
sb says:
“…an invisible eye and an arsenal of cunning…”, okay then…so is he playing or not?
September 10th, 2009 at 1:18 pm
3
BurritoBrosShits says:
Not a single Broken Cox joke yet?
September 10th, 2009 at 1:18 pm
4
MaconDawg says:
So we won’t be playing the Cocks with our Cox out after all? We’ll instead be playing with our Cox? So confused.
September 10th, 2009 at 1:36 pm
5
ohiodawg says:
#1 – good point. Swindle may look up tonight to see a drop of poison sliding down a string into his mouth. ONLY GINGER NINJAS MAY DISCUSS OTHER GINGER NINJAS!
September 10th, 2009 at 1:38 pm
6
EDSBS Dawg says:
I hope he saves some of that ninja smoke for when hes in the pocket.
September 10th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
7
meatybob says:
“Keep guessing, fools, for the Ginger Ninja is forever ahead and behind you.”
YOU LIE!
Oh wait, no that’s right.
September 10th, 2009 at 1:56 pm
8
Kevin@LSU says:
Tha Jawja Jinja Ninja thinks you don’t understand what its like…and he’s right.
September 10th, 2009 at 1:58 pm
9
Biggus Rickus says:
ohiodawg,
Possibly, but the drop would travel so slowly Orson would have plenty of time to recover.
General question: Is one game enough to begin making fun of your starting QB’s inability to actually play the posiition of QB and plan on drinking oneself into a stupor each Saturday afternoon to block out any memories of late-thrown helium balls drifting slowly toward their intended targets? What about a running back who falls down when a light breeze grazes his ankle?
September 10th, 2009 at 2:01 pm
10
Kevin@LSU says:
@ 9
the drop would miss orson’s mouth by a good 5 yards
September 10th, 2009 at 2:11 pm
11
hobeg8r says:
So staying at a Holiday Inn doesn’t count?
September 10th, 2009 at 2:18 pm
12
Will Q says:
The funny doesn’t make the tears stop.
September 10th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
13
Tommy says:
I need a “Cocks Can’t Lick Our Cox” shirt, like, yesterday.
September 10th, 2009 at 3:12 pm
14
Dawg85 says:
Joe’s starting and I think we’ll see a different Joe this week. At least I hope so.
That said — I love Joe’s new nickname. Great post.
September 10th, 2009 at 3:12 pm
15
Gen. Stoopnagle says:
Oh shit. Brandon Cox. Joe Cox.
Oh, we are so fucked.
September 10th, 2009 at 4:08 pm
16
sumbeech says:
I don’t care who you are, this here is funny
http://cfbwizard.com/2009/08/19/greatest-headline-in-the-history-of-sports-journalism/
September 11th, 2009 at 8:46 am