CURIOUS INDEX, 8/27/09

by Orson on Aug 27, 2009 9:14 AM EDT

In-UK-CHUCK. Pete Carroll, as he was for last year's game at the Coliseum, will be sufficiently enlarged for the game in Columbus in week two.

The photo has been removed due to a copyright claim. We have instead replaced it with something of appropriate response. O-H! (I-OMG I'M BEING RIPPED TO SHREDS BY EARL EVERETT.)

Told you: all part of the plan. Bryce Brown has been cleared by the NCAA to play at Tennessee after a momentary glance at fundraising for camp fees for the highly touted running back in high school.

Yarr. East Carolina students are pushing the Pirate Out, where students will dress like pirates in the stands for the November 4th game against Virginia Tech on ESPN. Anything putting more tricorne hats into circulation is fine with us, though for real verisimilitude, they might want to forgo all vegetables and fruit for a month beforehand to let the scurvy set in good and proper. Penn State fans have other wardrobe options now, too, but the Tressel sweatervest shirt still reins supreme in the department of coach-themed wear. (Unless you count Ole Miss's 2006 Orgeron JAWS OF DEATH outfit.)

Western Kentucky has Jihad in their defensive backfield. He will never get on a plane without at least three full-cavity searches: Western Kentucky cornerback Jihad Morris, whose parents really, really hated him, actually exists, plays for the Hilltoppers, and points and looks awesome with authority. Next player who does not exist but who will once we say that no one can ever be named this: Karbomm Jackson.

That's a full list you have there. The full list of Florida Gators up for preseason awards hints at the possible rostercaust faced by Florida if everyone who can go pro in 2010 does. This would be said if a.) this didn't happen every year ever in college football, and b.) you didn't recruit new people to take their places, and c.) if you are actually dumb enough to expect Florida to three-peat IF they win this year, which sounds dumb now, but watch people slap them up there at #1 in 2010's first preseason top 25s anyway.

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I hope that object moving up and down isn’t what I think it is

by haybeav on Aug 27, 2009 9:22 AM EDT reply actions

I knew this photo would make it here when I saw it. Just wondered what take LSUfreek would have. I was not disappointed.

by Crabapple Buck on Aug 27, 2009 9:25 AM EDT reply actions

AHHH!! Holy Hell, Freek… its too early in the morning to be seeing Pete Carroll’s junk at 10x magnification.

by CincySooner on Aug 27, 2009 9:27 AM EDT reply actions

That photo is pure genius. Since I’ve been thinking a lot these days about what I would do with my life if I weren’t a lawyer, it got me thinking…

Did Freek know at an early age that he would be a FREAKING PHOTOSHOP WIZARD (to put it crudely) or did he discover his calling later in life knowing and follow his dream knowing one day he would photoshop Win Forever’s head onto some speedo-clad dude dangling his sack in front of Tressel and the Bucks?

Oh well, looks like I’ve got some discovery to work on.

/sobs quietly while billing

by Self-hating Group 5er on Aug 27, 2009 9:36 AM EDT reply actions

The Cincinnati Bearcats had a basketball player named JIHAD MUHAMMAD on the team for a few years recently.

by Ohiodawg on Aug 27, 2009 9:41 AM EDT reply actions

I’m a lifelong Ohio State fan and even I found that funny. Well done, Freak.

by comoprozac on Aug 27, 2009 9:42 AM EDT reply actions

I see Petey’s into the manscaping. No real surprise I suppose.

by Gator03 on Aug 27, 2009 9:45 AM EDT reply actions

@CincySooner why do you assume that’s ten times magnification?

by GTSteve on Aug 27, 2009 10:04 AM EDT reply actions

Oh, and Tennessee is taking on the Big East Champion Bearcats in Knoxville in 2011.

by ohiodawg on Aug 27, 2009 10:12 AM EDT reply actions

Thanks Freek, there’s another monitor I need to reimburse the company for.

by GatorGreg on Aug 27, 2009 10:28 AM EDT reply actions

Do you have da Freek on retainer?

by eer in the ATL on Aug 27, 2009 11:32 AM EDT reply actions

Not one mention of Indiana selling a home game for $3M?

We already knew what they were…now we know the price.

http://indiana.rivals.com/content.asp?CID=980576

by boilerpete on Aug 27, 2009 12:30 PM EDT reply actions

I don’t know if this counts as “coach-themed wear” but I drank about a half of a bottle of scotch during the tailgate for last year’s ASU-UofA game in Tucson.

by Big Jon on Aug 27, 2009 8:31 PM EDT reply actions

Did I really just see Sweet Pete teabag Tressel? Further evidence why the internet is even better than fire.

by Bearcrawls on Aug 27, 2009 8:36 PM EDT reply actions

Just noting that you are using a pic that is copy right protected and no permission to use for commercial purpose to my knowledge.

by S. Allison on Aug 27, 2009 11:44 PM EDT reply actions

You know you stole that photo right?

by Ryah on Aug 28, 2009 2:30 AM EDT reply actions

[Boos 15, 16 offstage]

by TC on Aug 28, 2009 8:36 AM EDT reply actions

Re: #15 & 16:

For this Christmas, please ask Santa to finally bring you some humor chromosomes.

by Geaux Irish on Aug 28, 2009 9:58 AM EDT reply actions

I’m sure I can speak for the realistic and not militaristic arm of the Buckeye fan base by slipping a quiet “fuck you” for being overly sensitive about recent history #s 15 and 16.

This coming from someone whose pictures float on through the internet in a way that would make Modest Mouse smile.

by dave on Aug 28, 2009 10:16 AM EDT reply actions

LOL…You got busted and had to remove it. So to because LSUfreek is upset and acting like a whiny little bitch he puts up OSU fans upset about a loss…oh the irony!

by the regulator on Aug 28, 2009 10:19 AM EDT reply actions

Haven been a Buckeye fan at that game I cant believe the video is only 2 minutes long? I could have put together so much more… There is always this year folks!!? or maybe another video?

by chi town spieth on Aug 28, 2009 10:31 AM EDT reply actions

Wait, there was more game after Ted Ginn ran that kickoff back? Shit I don’t remember that. I must have systematically blacked that out with bourbon, booger sugar and years of therapy.

by cob on Aug 28, 2009 10:58 AM EDT reply actions