WHITHER THE MAGNIFICENT, DEAFENING AIRHORN?

The service academies could really mess up their opponents if they worked in an air raid siren. Is it just celebrating a big play? Or is it time to duck and cover and kiss your ass goodbye? Only they know.

JD -

I am old enough to have lived in Wichita, KS back when Wichita State still fielded a Shocker football team. They had pregame flyovers from just about every military aircraft the nearby Air Force base could turn up. It was, admittedly, AWESOME. Not sure if you could get away with doing it during a game, but if you could, that would be an amazing home-field advantage.

Yes to Japanese percussion, but no to taiko drums. What about those handheld drummy things they used in Karate Kid 3 or whatever that you twirl between your palms?

If it helped Ralph Macchio become a martial artist nonpareil, surely it can help Syracuse win more than 3 games a season.

How about the didgeridoo? Behold its various and sundry powers:

*When played by a stadium full of performers, it is either viscerally irritating or transcendently cool in that authentic-world-music sort of way, depending on whether you are playing or forced to hear it.
*The fact that the didgeridoo is a sacred instrument to the Aboriginal peoples of Australia makes your performance of this instrument an act of desecration, even more so if you happen to be female. Bonus!
*Can be made out of wood or a variety of other implements you can find in your home, including PVC, aluminum or copper pipe, and other long, hollow, lightweight, resonant materials.
*you can make it look like a penis. 100 cocktails for this reason alone.
*It can bear a witty message, such as “The sporting group from our area is superior to the sporting group from your area”
*You can possibly hide alcoholic containers within its unknowable depths.
*When your team has won or lost, you can then use the didgeridoo to celebrate by touching the opposing team’s fans in ways that span from merely annoying, possibly accidental poking and nudging to full-out enforcer-style high-sticking that would get you ejected from the wildest hockey game.

Orson, I think you’re problem was that you weren’t using the inverted paddle technique perfected by Eddie Stanley at his 11th birthday party. He only used in during crucial break points much like Stallone’s ‘grip shift’ in Over The Top.

Miss. State tried using the airhorns years ago after being told they’d be louder than cowbells. Unfortunately for the Bulldog faithful, no matter how hard they shook the horns, the noise didn’t even come close to that of shaking a cowbell.

In a somewhat unrelated matter, Hardbat Challenge Bar Division Winner: won by a dude from RIGHT FUCKING HERE IN MOBILE, ALABAMA (Corner Bar, Dauphin St.). Yeah, we can drink, and we still win shit. Roll Tide —w/ a $100k upgrade.

The Harsh Tutelage by Brazil >>> The Cruel Tutelage by Pei Mei

Rape whistle? Gotta be Syracuse.

in all fairness to philly fans, it was michael irvin.

Oddly enough, I caught a portion of the Travelers Championship on Saturday where a spectator was utilizing the air horn in true douchetastic fashion. I was fairly surprised that it happened at TPC River Highlands and not Bethpage.

The air horns from the confederation cup made me realize what a stadium sized hornets nest would sound like, so clearly, Georgia Tech should look into this. BEES

I have been telling people that Al Golden is going to put Temple football on the map.
I can now offer this post as vindication.

6

Damn, so that’s why it never worked for me. No wonder I switched majors from engineering to business.

BTW, don’t forget the Wampus Cat, a truly hideous sound.

In Baton Rouge they would play “The Brown Note” on some huge ass speakers before LSU runs onto the field. This would definitely be an advantage because most of the Tiger fans are pants-shitting drunk anyway, so only the visitors would notice.

Maracas could be used by Florida A&M. The “Rattlers” might get more annoying than intimidating, but anything to throw the opponent of his game.

I’m going to go with the Recorder on this one…. although really any kind of instrument in the hands of 85K would be irritating…

Notredame could say a mass. Or better yet, perform an exorcism, throwing the green glob at the visiting QB at the end.

USC could give out those little vibrators that now come with a box of Trojans. Say, 50,000 or so bees, the resultant moaning and then group screams, would just about do the trick.

Orson, did you find the link to TBD from the GT scout post I made? Today has been a high traffic day for the site…not only did I spread the word to scout, but you guys linked it and today the New York Times linked the blog in their countdown entry for Navy.

Be sure to keep an eye on that blog for spread option goodness. TBD is as good an analyst outside a coaching staff you’re going to find for the PJ spread.

Orson you have my sympathy. I made it through your first sentence. Mccarran Airport has to be the worst collection of disease, filth and regret in the U.S. (though I’ve never been to Mississippi so I don’t know how credible my opinion is). I spent 8 hours there the day after last year’s Super Bowl. I’m happy I didn’t need anything amputated afterwards.

I feel confident in saying rape whistles would never be employed anywhere near Iowa’s home stadium.

RIP Billy Mays, I hope they bury you in the finest Oxy Clean money can buy.
http://www.tampabay.com/news/publicsafety/article1014018.ece

And this is 100% awesome:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tyct9l-fD8

Back in the WLAF days there were a couple of Frankfurt fans had hand cranked air raid sirens on tripods. They were seriously loud. Unsurprisingly.

Hey, the motherfucker is walking now, isn’t he?

…..I bought a case of air horns once, then handed ‘em out on Christmas Day to my Roll Tide uncle’s seven grandkids. You haven’t lived, till you’ve seen a bunch of drunk people on Christmas Day trying to chase down 7 hyperactive, overdriven kids with air horns in the house!

…..The nice thing about a case of air-horns is that you can re-arm the little insurgents, after their weapons have been confiscated…

not a fifer @ 23 – I bet there were more than a few shaky geriatrics after those sirens went off… in fact it was probably more effective than the brown note proposed for Baton Rouge.

Always have to pick on Philly…and Temple. Bully. Why not Penn? They play football (sort of). Or Villanova? Prep school kids don’t fight with broken beer bottles in the parking lot?

Shocked that you failed to drag out the snowballing santa claus incident that (allegedly) occurred half a century ago.