WASHINGTON STATE IS STRONG WITH THE FULMER CUP SPIRIT

by Orson on Jun 10, 2009 6:46 PM EDT

If Florida is the high-end, couture buy for those seeking the criminally troubled major college football brand, the Washington State is the affordable, mid-sized alternative with almost as much total punch. Hell, for individual flair, Xavier Hicks is the best buy by himself. Don't think of the Cougars as a one-man team, though. He may be their Lebron, but he does have teammates, and they refuse to let the man do the job single-handedly.

Ronnie James Dio wants to bless this with his satanic powers, because it is that powerful. Go ahead, RJD.

Ah, GifParty. You never let us down. Then again, neither does Wazzou:

Tyree Toomer and LeAndre Daniels were arrested on theft and burglary charges and were immediately suspended...

Toomer and Daniels are accused of second degree burglary, residential burglary and theft in the second and third degrees.

Gadzooks, that's quite a load of points. Burglary and theft don't strike us as misdemeanors, meaning the standard three-point award for any felony here has to apply, but how is a really, really good question at this point. The conservative. Wazzu sits right now with nine points. Four felony charges are listed there, a grand sum of 12 points if you only count them as a lump sum, and not as two people's charges doubled.

At the bare minimum, we're looking at 12 Fulmer Cup points for Wazzu, and the effective Fulmer Cup lead. (USF also has 17, but all of their points from Trent Pupello's one-man riot and pistol-whipping clinic in a bar parking lot.) If you would like to play safety at Washington State and taste the special experience of playing Dan Hawkins-approved Divison One Football, just wait until everyone in front of you is arrested, and you'll see the field soon enough.

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Dio can thank his grandmother for originating the Devil Horns hand sign of Rock.

He can also thank Gallagher for his wispy mane.

by LSUFreek on Jun 10, 2009 7:21 PM EDT reply actions

http://apps.leg.wa.gov/RCW/default.aspx?cite=9A.56.050

Theft in the 3rd is a gross misdemeanor. The rest are felonies of various classes, according to the Washington state criminal code. I have experience with the Washington state civil code, oddly enough.

by Coop on Jun 10, 2009 8:29 PM EDT reply actions

Doesn’t Wazzou have 19 points now? The big board had them with seven points earlier in the week, plus these 12.

by JD on Jun 10, 2009 8:54 PM EDT reply actions

Man, I honestly feel sorry for Washington State fans. Not only did Bill Doba not recruit for shit, when he did recruit he brought in a bunch of reprobates. My sympathy to you, Mr. Paul Wulff, and your efforts to make your team not be an embarrassment to the Pac-10.

by AERose on Jun 11, 2009 12:56 AM EDT reply actions

Hate to be myself here, but damn

by GrammarNazi on Jun 11, 2009 2:54 AM EDT reply actions

I feel that the points MUST be doubled. Aren’t the rules of the Fulmer Cup based per NFL minor league player (a.k.a college player, a.k.a. aspiring felon) and not per crime? Therefore, considering Coop’s June 10th 7:29 pm observation Washington State should be awarded 22 points for a total of 31 points. My personal observation is that an extra at-a-boy point should also be added per NFL minor league offender due to the number of charges filed at one time thereby bringing the total to 24 points for this offense.

Scott

by Scott on Jun 11, 2009 1:46 PM EDT reply actions

Orson, I’m sure you know that Orlando locals refer to the offices of that rag known as the newspaper as the “Slantinel”. If there was an award to be given for beating a dead horse, they’d win hands down.

You know, some pissed-off Gator fan should start a site called www.fireandreaadelson.com. That jock-sniffing bitch lives to find something controversial with Gator football – and believe it or not, she’s a UF alum.

And all those Slantinel hacks are trollbaiting that blog over UF having 24 arrests in 4 years? Shit, that pales in comparison to Wazzou’s (geez, nice nickname for a school – don’t they know that’s another term to descrive your ass?) indiscretions and UGA’s 30 arrests in 4 years.

by JJ Gator on Jun 11, 2009 1:50 PM EDT reply actions

WSU may have probelms but at least they did not end up 0-12 like UW. I mean really? That was a crime of special circumstance not committed in how many years by a D1 school right? that should be 1 point for every year that it has not happend and a multipler for how long it’s been since a PAC-10 team went winless in the conference. Those are crimes against football that are hard to even measure. Please advise.

by Duper on Jun 11, 2009 2:58 PM EDT reply actions