CURIOUS INDEX, 5/28/09
by Orson on May 28, 2009 9:35 AM EDT
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"That really hurt..it kinda sucks..."...and according to Minnesota's media guide, it did not happen. The reporter's funereal tones are delicious here. Anyway, unlike last week's quasi-bullshit story about Notre Dame completely whitewashing Charlie Weis' record in the ND media guide, this appears to be complete non-oversight excision in action. In an only tangentially related note, Play4Brew, Coach Brewster's site, has the cleverest subtle marketing tool to possible recruits: a built-in player streaming Minneapolis rapper Atomsphere's "Shhh" and Gopher fight songs and highlight clips. The gesture's nice, but hope they don't pay attention to the lyrics: Got trees and vegetation in the city I stay and... The nightlife ain't all that, but that's okay Andre Debose, like many top recruits, had "ample parking" and "ain't-all-that" nightlife listed high on his preferences of what to look for in a school. 37 points seems vulgar, and awesome. Um...it won't be this lopsided, unless it is. You don't really understand this. You know it, but you won't understand it until it happens: if Florida gets up, you will not want to watch what happens. Oh, sure, you want to see a zombie exorcism until you get in the room and start actually watching it happen. Then you ask yourself, "Oh, wait. What was I thinking? This is horrifying," and run for the door screaming. The only ones left in the room will be Florida fans, and we will be pantsless and pleasuring ourselves in unholy ways. (So, pretty much what happens half the time anyway.) Hey, now, Arkansas is a conference game. Adjusting for schedule, Boise State had the worst discrepancy between their own talent and their opponents' in 2008, but you can't blame them too much, as the WAC remains the WAC. (Double free points to all customers all Saturday long, and on some Thursdays, too!) Florida Since no one's talking about them, they might be quite good. Athlon has Cal at 11. We will believe any ranking if you have Jahvid Best on your team, because he is pure terror in compression shorts and a helmet. Also, unlike prior years, there's very little early static about their potential excellence, meaning they might actually do pretty well. YOU DIE AND GO TO HELL ATHLON SHHHHHH. Suck it, boyo. JoePa on Notre Dame joining an expanded Big Ten in the land of the lurid hypothetical: "There's some pressure, I would suppose, to maybe go back to Notre Dame and ask again, which I would not be happy with," Paterno said. "I think they've had their chance." Notre Dame can probably live with the heartbreak of not having to deal with the biggest dickface in the universe and his magnificent network. Currently airing? 2003 Michigan at Minnesota, football. Why continue this charade: the only reason we find the Big Ten Network to be such a convenient punching bag is its dickface architect, Jim Delany, and the fact that the Big Ten is very kickable right now. Put Arkansas Kentucky 2003 on at 9:30 in the |
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Hope you are feeling better Orson.
I guess Ole Miss wasn’t affected by the talent gap last year. At home no less. Giggity.
The Big Ten Network has been good for the conference (think $$$), it serves another purpose. While they still have agreements with the mouse, it gives a better coverage of the teams without the WWL slant. Since the cycle of mediocrity may come to an end before the WWL will admit, you can get your highlights without insults. As a bonus, more in depth coverage of Indiana players defending a rock. Poorly.
by Crabapple Buck on May 28, 2009 9:55 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Thanks! (Downs four Vicodin to kill the memory of Shay Hodge streaking uncovered down the sidelines.)
by Orson Swindle on May 28, 2009 10:02 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
That guy doing the broadcast resembles a strung out and quite terrified Jay Mohr……it harkens to those videos where the hostage has a gun to his head while he demeans the capitalist/imperialist swine
by Stan Gable on May 28, 2009 9:56 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
@swindle: Fuck……….. MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
by ALGator on May 28, 2009 10:20 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
What is: My reaction to the Shay Hodge play.
by ALGator on May 28, 2009 10:21 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
$*&^^#@@
(sister-in-law’s wedding is Florida-Tennessee weekend)
$%^&@^#%?#&!!!!
by GatorAM on May 28, 2009 10:23 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
The best part of the ‘03 Kentucky-Arkansas game was Jared Lorenzen yelling at Wildcat fans who were leaving the game "Where are y’all goin’? We’re gonna win this *%!#^ game!"
And it was all broadcast on live TV. I’m an Arkansas fan but that 300-pounder can play for me any day.
by PeayHog on May 28, 2009 10:27 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
8
Truly succulent. Looks like she’s a Beaver fan too.
by yoyofutbawl on May 28, 2009 10:38 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
The best stat of the Ark/Ken game.
Jared Lorenzen had as many carries (15) as Matt Jones and a long of 25 yards he had to be about to die by the end of this game.
by cfc09 on May 28, 2009 10:47 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
So, was it Dwayne Walker or Karl Dorrell that got popped for suspicion of drunken driving? I seem to recall they look the same.
You have a BAC of 01 and the cops still take you in for suspicion of drunk driving? Either Walker dropped trou and told the cops kiss his arse or the Las Cruces police have some explaining to do.
by Coop on May 28, 2009 10:50 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Hey O:
Did this get included in a Fulmer Cupdate? Apparently this happened on May 2nd, but the story is just coming out now.
by Charlestowne on May 28, 2009 11:08 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Ha! Clemson must have hired some Athens/Clarke Co. coppers.
The scooter violation crime wave has spread… Tennessee and Georgia Tech are surely next.
by Gen. Stoopnagle on May 28, 2009 11:21 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I was at UK-Ark. By about the 5th OT I didnt care who won.
College OT rules suck. Hard.
Kentucky was only in the game because of special teams play, especially punt and kick returns. Guess
what aspect of the game the OT rules throw away?
by gtne91 on May 28, 2009 11:24 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Cocaine is a helluva drug.
In the span of three seasons, Arkansas played two 7OT games and another 6OT game. It’s a wonder I’m still alive.
by Sue E. Pig on May 28, 2009 11:29 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Um, yeah, speaking as a Cal season ticket holder (through the auspices of the lovely Mrs. J), if the Bears are the 11th best team in the country I will eat my own gentleman’s accessory. Any team that loses three starting linebackers, the best center in the country, and STILL has a quarterback controversy despite finally getting shut of Nate Loadshorts? Hell, I’m not convinced they’re the 11th best team in the Pac-10.
/desperate-reverse-jinx
by Vandy J on May 28, 2009 11:51 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Yeah I wonder why the Clemson news took so long to come out to us, usually its the next day for a DUI or drugs.
by DrB on May 28, 2009 12:08 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
www.ramblingwreck.com routes to www.ramblinwreck.com for those who are uncomfortable with the more relaxed spelling, I suppose. Good on Tech to increase the likelihood of catching surfers.
I checked to see if UF had also nabbed the domain name “corchurbanmeyers.com” and other (apparently) acceptable variations, but they have not. Oops! Somebody already owns cum.com, and it’s every bit as SFW as you’d expect it to be.
by NCT on May 28, 2009 12:18 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
The Big Ten Network definitely peaked with the first football game they ever showed. Even if it was the Appy State-Michigan game and it embarrassed the shit out of their league.
by JD on May 28, 2009 12:35 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
55-doughnut? What 55-doughnut? I remeber hanging out at the dome with 25,000 Iowa fans, but I thought it was a monster truck rally. It had to be, that’s the only thing Iowa people like other than wrestling and footall. And there’s no way 25,000 of them would come to Minnesota for either of those things. Unless they all came to see the electricity or indoor plumbing. But it couldn’t have been a 55-0 curbstomping in football.
No, I’m not crying. It’s just a little dusty around here.
by WhiteSpeedReceiver on May 28, 2009 12:39 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Dude, you’re totally underrating that 2003 Minnesota-Michigan game, which featured a 58-yard transcontinental John Navarre touchdown that has gone down in Michigan lore as “the Buffalo Stampede.” That’s comedy.
by Brian @ MGoBlog on May 28, 2009 1:08 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Actually Orson Cal has been ranked in the top 20 to top 15 consistently in literally every pre season poll and WHY DON’T YOU JUST ADMIT THAT YOU COULDN’T POINT OUT THE PAC-10 STATES ON A MAP~
by AERose on May 28, 2009 5:45 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
AERose: when they become full-fledged members of the Union, we’ll happily learn where they are. Wait, wha—-
by Orson Swindle on May 28, 2009 5:53 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Funny it’s not just the media guide that got edited. Try – http://www.play4brew.com/umFinal.html Be sure to go down and attempt to click on the Iowa game itself, the highlights, the photos, or “brew’s breakdown”. There are none for that game.
The revisionism is practically North Korean. I couldn’t thank Minne more though – this is a rich vein of idiotic gold.
by Keo on May 29, 2009 12:26 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Thomas Davis is not impressed by Decori Birmingham.
Matt Jones + 6 or 7 OT’s = bliss.
by Hobnail_Boot on May 29, 2009 6:07 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I was at the Gopher-Wolverine game in 2003…also a tremendous game, if you had watched it to its conclusion. An epic loss, even for Minnesota Golden Gopher Football. #1 in my lifetime.
by gopher_2006 on May 29, 2009 11:40 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
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