CURIOUS INDEX, 5/18/09
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There is no hate in Michigan. It is a system… …one Bo Schembechler’s son, Ziggy Jutjaw Schembechler*, says Rich Rodriguez forced his system a bit in his first year as head coach at Michigan. For dinner at the Columbus Michigan alumni dinner: obvious chicken in duh sauce, followed by a dessert of delicious candied stupidly evident. (HT: CFT.) *His name is Glenn, but our name for him is way better. Well, boy, they’re good quotes sound better from a can don’t they? Monte Kiffin was in the NFL so long he is incapable of speaking anything but pablum when talking about his opponents, indicating he has three thousand times more sense than his perpetually interesting and quotable son. Summary: Florida’s fast, it’s hard to defend fast unless you practice against fast, that’s hard, so preparing is hard and football is hard and there’s five more stacks of obvious for you. Kick some ass, Zombie Crusader. Joe Paterno is set to crusade. Remember that Crusades always ended well–especially the Children’s Crusade, or as Joe Pa calls it, “his middle school experience.” Tubs goes online. Tommy Tuberville, Jim Donnan, and Terry Donahue have all signed with BusterSports, a new college sports-themed community whose primary attribute as a website at the moment seems to be abundant investment capital and tiny font. I’m doing this as hard as I can. You poor, poor thing. We’re doing this as hard as we possibly can, Bobby Bowden, because the NCAA is not punishing you because you failed to be politically correct, but because your program stepped across even the last, most obvious warning line set by an organization loath to punish all but the most egregious violations of the extremely lenient contract set up among its member orgs. |
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1
Crabapple Buck says:
RichRod’s “system” worked in the Big East until the midgets got hurt as the season went on. The Big Ten, despite perceptions among the SEC masses, is bigger and stronger. This means that if you get UM on your schedule early, you may find a healthy UM to be trouble. As the season wears on and the smaller players have to play hurt or not at all, UM will suffer the fate that WfV did. Losing late to teams that were seemingly inferior and to tOSU, which is superior. Time off before a bowl game brings players back for a respectable performance and hope for the next year.
Once he is fired, the next coach will find that the transition to bigger players begats more losing until his classes mature. Either way, UM should be a Fulmer Cup contender regardless of on field performance. They need to keep ND on their schedule to pad their record.
May 18th, 2009 at 10:03 am
2
Counter Trap says:
That Michigan animation is not accurate–they show the QB as mobile, which we all know was not the case in Ann Arbor or elsewhere in Rod’s 2008 season. Standing there with cement shoes waiting for the Will linebacker is no way to go through life, son.
Tommy Tubberville, Jim Donnan and Terry Donahue. I don’t think he has the temperment for it, but Donahue has to be Moe because Larry and Curley are pretty bovious in that lineup.
May 18th, 2009 at 10:09 am
3
WhiteSpeedReceiver says:
I suspect plaigarism. There aren’t more than 3 Michigan fans alive who have the brainpower to figure out what’s actually going on in a football game.
May 18th, 2009 at 10:33 am
4
Tailgate Shogun says:
I like this quote from the UM fan:
“”I want to believe (Rodriguez) is the answer,” Stout said.”
Which clearly means, “This guy is a douchebag, but I really have no other choice considering how much money our school is flushing down the toilet during his hopefully brief tenure.”
May 18th, 2009 at 11:29 am
5
goblue says:
#1: What about UF’s midget speed? They seem to do ok against SEC defenses.
Also, if anyone doubted Ohio’s obsession with all things Michigan, note what newspaper ran this article. Rabbit-boiling obsession.
May 18th, 2009 at 11:43 am
6
cob says:
@5- UF’s “midget speed” is not at QB. They have a somewhat stouter signal caller. Pat White getting hurt was the reason that boat caught fire in 07. UF loses Percey ‘Harvey’ and can make it work with other parts. The “midget speed” QB was really the problem in WbfgV (in this particular sense, injuries). The point being that the scheme is not the personnel and vice-versa.
As for “Rabbit-boiling obsession”; the article is about Rich Rodriguez at Murfield Village two weeks before the Memorial Tournament…in Columbus. Any and all excuses to bring up the Memorial Tourney are likely being used for SOME semblance of content. I realize newspapers are NEARLY irrelevant but until that comes to delightful fruition, they report on local happenings from time to time.
May 18th, 2009 at 12:46 pm
7
yoyofutbawl says:
Childrens Crusade my ass. JoePa was a Centurion at Cannae. I’m not gonna get suckered in on that Middle Ages crap. Vince Dooley, maybe.
May 18th, 2009 at 12:52 pm
8
justanotherbuckeye says:
@goblue,
If “Rabbit-boiling obsession” is what it takes to give Michigan a loss every year, then I’m all for it.
Now please, remember how this works. OSU stomps UM ass, then OSU loses to SEC, then OSU threatens to send it’s bitch UM down to some middling Florida bowl to beat SEC ass for them…………………let Rich Rod know this, he didn’t hold up his end of the bargain last year.
May 18th, 2009 at 1:38 pm
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conquering lion in the 215 says:
Not to seem like the ancient history police – but had JoePa served with Varro at Cannae he probably would not have made it out seeing as the Carthaginians killed 80 to 90% of the consular army arrayed against them. That scenario is correlative to the popular conception of the Big 10, however (particularly, in regards to the SEC). A ponderous, well-disciplined army moves straight ahead “three yards and a cloud of dust”-style all the while getting owned on the edges by lighter troops until the final, fatal envelopment.
The only way to reverse that disturbing trend is to have Jim Delaney institute a series of reforms similar to that of Scipio Africanus prior to Hannibal’s downfall at Zama – namely, increase the amount of light velites skirmishers (with midget speed, of course) in the Big Eleven legion to disturb and blunt the effectiveness of the SEC’s superior cavalry and elephant’s (hopefully in time for PSU’s series with Bama, though I doubt Saban’s pachyderm’s make it back over the Appalachians alive after their game in the Beav.) as well as a checkerboard defensive scheme that allow’s the SEC mounted troops to become bogged down in the staggered Front Four while the linebacker’s use the benefit of the blunted charge to take new and devastating pursuit angles. Once the speed and mobility is erased from the equation, the heavy infantry can close in the best tradition of Woody Hayes and engage at close quarters.
May 18th, 2009 at 1:57 pm
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Albino Tornado says:
Absolutely nothing can go wrong when a new, offensive-minded coach attempts to ramrod a new system in place with zero thought given to the applicability of the existing players to execute it.
I mean, the Nebraska offense in 2004 was a juggernaut. A 23-interception-committing, 10-fumbling, completely-bland juggernaut that was one of the worst teams in Nebraska history.
Who could have possibly seen Michigan’s season coming? Who indeed?
May 18th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
11
goblue2000 says:
@justanotherbuckeye,
I doubt that the Disaster running another MICHIGAN IZ TEH SUXORS!!!! LMAO article is going to give UM any more losses. ZOMG! NO FAMILY VALUES!!!
Come on…the article has nothing to do with golf. Look at the headline: “Rob Oller commentary: Deep in enemy territory, Michigan alums gather”. Oller mentioned the Memorial in passing once. An article about 30 UM grads having a get-together with a reporter showing up to interview them about RR? Must have been a slow news day in Columbus. When I read the headline I figured that these were ex players that were interviewed, but a cardiologist and a lawyer? Yeah, I’m really interested in their opinion on how RR is doing. No offense to Bo’s son, but he isn’t doing the hiring or firing at UM either.
May 18th, 2009 at 9:25 pm
12
cob says:
“must be a slow news day in Columbus”…as opposed to…
May 19th, 2009 at 2:12 pm