CURIOUS INDEX, 5/1/2009

Peace, and Humptiness forever.

Was the T. Kyle King blurb supposed to have one of the linky-things?

JoePa ate up all her crackers and her licorice too.

And when they 69 Joe’s humpty nose will tickle her rear

his nose is big.
uh-uh, not afraid.
big like a pickle.
he’s still getting paid.

Wow! Forget about 40 times, bench press reps… Angelo’s stats really jump off the page, this kid is a stud, I mean add him to your roster and your team is immediately in contention for the cup and perhaps an ETJ3 Award. You would need one more “go-to” recruit to compete for the cup, of course. Under the right tutelage, this kid is a can’t miss 5 star prospect.

Angelo Omega Hadley

million-dollar name, ten-cent head…

aubrey hadley, pictured in the article, looks like antrel rolle.

aubrey hadley, pictured in the article, looks like antrel rolle.

The mental image of JoePa doing the humpty dance with Tupak is never, ever going to leave me. I thank you for that Swindle.

So was that just another way of saying that next year he’ll do what he likes? Eat what he likes, etc. because he gets around?

Instead of JoePa wanting to add a cupcake from the northeast, I have a better idea. State Penn should join the pussies in the Big East and let the Big Ten go back to the number they have in their title. Then he could schedule all the easy games he used to schedule as an independent, in conference.

Callwutchyulike

I’d pay my mortal fortune to see Kiffykins and Meyer in a 10 minute street fight, dont even care who wins…

cute and chubby was usually a strong indicator of a fun night in college.

I agree with JoePa, that kid who is coaching Florida has some potential.

Crabapple @ 11

Someone sounds awful annoyed about missing out on two of the last four outright big 10 titles due to the head octagenarian in charge.

DanF

No, just tired of the incessant whining from the Fulmer Cup wannabes. If he wants to play more northeast teams, he needs a new conference. I think tOSU will survive with or without the rabble in State College.

I am surprised that he mentioned Pitt as a potential Big 10 team since according to Beano Cook it was JoePa that pretty much killed that rivalry.

As a 4x Derby veteran myself, I am jealous of anyone in that city this weekend. Last time I was there I had booze in my hand 40 of the 48 hours I was in town. Hopefully you’ll be hitting up the infield and taking in all the redneckerish/whitetrashery that it has to offer; booze, nudity (both voluntary and involuntary), brawls, gambling, sex (buddy of mine hooked up in a port-a-john), costumes, wrestling, slip & slides, mud, 90K people, sunburns, etc. etc…..

Haha – I had forgotten the buckeyes were on the level of Stanford, Notre Dame and Duke.

They would certainly survive, just with a much lower strength of schedule and another tune-up for “the game”

JoePa likes the girls with the boom. He once got busy in the College Pizza bathroom.

I was wondering what the most audacious and impolite thing you could say at a Kentucky Derby drink-a-thon would be. Then I realized there probably isn’t an answer to that question.

#19, maybe saying that a horse runs like the wife of the horse owner, which would lead to having a duel to defend the honor of the horse.

After several decades, which is more decadent and depraved: the Derby, or the World’s Largest Outdoor Coke Orgy? Inquiring minds and all that.

Wes, in my experience it’s the Coke Orgy, hands down. Unless you spend Derby weekendholed up at a party at the Super 8 outside Lexington and never make it into Louisville, in which case it’s a tossup. The Landing in Jacksonville is the place to go to see those things you’ll never be able to unsee.

How to do JoePa’s Humpty Dance:

First you limp to the side like your hip was broken
Shaking and twitching kinda like you was smokin’
Crazy wack funky
People say you look like Bo Schembechler on crack, JoePa!

So if Orson’s in KY drunk on Firefly Juleps, I guess we can’t expect some liveblogging of today’s Congressional BCS hearings.

@22
“Unless you spend Derby weekend holed up at a party at the Super 8 outside Lexington.”

/shudders
//you weren’t even in the right city, for chrissakes!

[Unless you spend Derby weekend holed up at a party at the Super 8 outside Lexington]

Personally, I’d be going “How the hell did I end up in Lexington?”

Not to compete with someone so worldly as to have , “Macon,” in their name*, but no, Georgia-Florida does in no way compare to the debauchery that goes on at the Derby. The only people who say that are the ones who have never been to the Derby.

Put it this way, everyone from Wall Street, before you know happened, came down for the Derby,. Sheiks from Saudia Arabia and the UAE come over for the Derby. Nobody from Bear Stearns or Goldman Sachs or Lehmans was flying to Jax for the World’s Largest Coke Orgy. No hedge fund managers make Georgia-Florida a priority. Was Georgia-Florida referenced in any Bret Easton Ellis novel, such as American Psycho?

• - I grew up in SC so I have no room to talk.

Coop:

So what you’re saying is we can blame our current financial crunch on the fact that they were sipping mint julieps while running the train on a Louisville coed?

If so, I fully support this recession.

#17
You sure you are not talking about Talledega?

The comments section on the idiot from UNC was awesome. Not too much compassion shown to the three losers.

Who else thinks that Hadley will be in a Marshall uniform if he doesn’t have to serve time?

RE: DERBY v COCKTAIL PARTY

I have been to both 10 times, and the more decadent and depraved is Derby, and it’s not. even. close.

It’s Cocktail party but worldwide instead of regionally tribal, and instead of all the negative enegry/aggro with the entire group fiercely divided in half and rabidly against one another, everyone is on the same page and the vibe is all love & positivity, which weirdly adds to the debauchery.

How many naked people have you ever seen at cocktail party ever? You’ll see twice your answer in 2 hours in the 3rd turn of the infield. People having sex, old dudes running around naked twirling thier tighty-whiteys around their head Peety Pable helicopter style screaming “wooooooooo!!!”, an entire brick of unwrapped cream cheese randomly falling out of the sky into your tailgate that has been tossed from afar with no explanation, you get the idea…

But even cooler is the the crowd consists of every walk of life & stripe of society. Jorts & ribbed wifebeaters to Shieks and billionaires in Armani suits, and everything in between- it truly is an “all shapes & sizes”/“it takes a village” thing, whereas cocktail party/SEC football is super awesome but a much more homogenized slice of the humanity pie.

And the absolute kicker, and you’re gonna have to trust me on this one: the number {total and % of group} of beautiful/hott women? Derby absolutely crushes even SEC football. It’s blasphemy but it’s true, and even our fearless leader Swindle admitted it to be so when I talked to him this weekend. It’s RETARDED.

More on this here: http://dodgyatbest.blogspot.com/2006/05/kentucky-derby-1018-why-derby-is-most.html

All I can say is, if you EVER get the chance to go… GO.

“Yo Angelo, should we go for the furniture?”
“Lawya, I’m the damn F*ck Lion! You can go for tha china, too!”