CURIOUS INDEX, 4/14/2008

by Orson on Apr 14, 2009 10:39 AM EDT Comment 30 comments

...because that's where meaningless boondoggle's gonna be. Quick! Where's the college football hall of fame located? In South Bend, Indiana, though a group of investors wants to move it to Dallas. WOOOOO WEEE THIS IDEA IS CRAZY. Now, the Walker Texas Ranger song.

We'll take your 2000 draft class retroactively, please. Miami's long draft streak will end this year. The mournful sounds of gunshots being fired from apartment windows in Coral Gable can be heard, if you squint your ears, from as far away as Hialeah. Perhaps that's just the constant ambient gunfire of the Miami area, but let your poetic license overcome reality for once, dammit.

Like Spurrier, but the Crystal Light edition. Rick Neuheisel gets stabby regarding Cal's admissions standards, asking questions like "Why didn't Marshawn Lynch get into UCLA?" Well, duh: Lynch couldn't very well study with the center for beam physics at UCLA, could he? His efforts to unlock the secrets of Beast Mode needed the right scientific collaborators, that's all. This comes via an interview with Neuheisel by Bruins Nation, who as bloggers got to sit down with the coach personally, which is very cool.

Back in time for the Michigan game! Suspended Spartan running back Glenn Winston was sentenced to 180 days in jail for his role in a fight with hockey players. He was wearing a tie at the time, though, something that will likely keep him on the team in Mark Dantonio's judgment.

And this Bird you Cannot Change. Omar Hunter, Florida tackle, showing proper technique in demolishing a pat interview question.

If you could have dinner with any three people, living or deceased, who’d be at the table with you?

Jay-Z, Martin Luther King and Lynyrd Skynyrd. I love all of them.

Pretty sure you're cheating by folding in a six piece band into that answer, Omar, but as long as they're rocking a wailing twin guitar solo the entire time, you're good with us.

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Chuck Norris EST Walker Texas Ranger.

by Natijacket on Apr 14, 2009 10:43 AM EDT reply actions

Peter Matthiessen, Teddy Roosevelt, and Faster Pussycat.

by Ltrain on Apr 14, 2009 10:51 AM EDT reply actions

Douglas Adams, the wife, and Tsutomu Yamaguchi, to ensure that if there is a third atomic bomb attack, we’re going to be the ones who survived it.

by Orson Swindle on Apr 14, 2009 11:00 AM EDT reply actions

Is it really a good idea to put the College Football Hall of Fame right down the street from the home of the most disgraced college football program of all time?

Thurgood Marshall, Raymond Chandler, Nina Hartley.

by Harris on Apr 14, 2009 11:01 AM EDT reply actions

Walker Percy, Hunter S. Thompson and Bear Bryant.

by yoyofutbawl on Apr 14, 2009 11:02 AM EDT reply actions

There’s no stoppping Dallas on this one. They just might do CFBHOF* if they can’t get the real one.

by HeadThief on Apr 14, 2009 11:06 AM EDT reply actions

Beethoven, U.S. Grant, Dick Proenneke

by softbatch on Apr 14, 2009 11:10 AM EDT reply actions

Good choice Omar! I actually met Lynyrd Skynyrd once and he was one cool dude. Back in college some buddies and I were camping in North Georgia. We were sitting around the campfire rocking to FreeeeeeeBiiiirrrrdddd. One of my friends gave me an after dinner "mint." It was kind of odd, a small square of paper, which did not taste like much of anything, nor did it do much for my breath. Anyway, a few hours later, I was wandering through the forest playing my own real life version of Pitfall. You know, where you have to swing on vines or run over randomly opening and closing holes in the earth, jumping over scorpions underground and jumping on the heads of alligators to get across the pond (yeah, alligators in North Georgia? But they were THERE man!). So at the end of the last stage, I came face to face with Lynyrd. Freaky dude, he did the weirdest things with his eyes and hair, but when he started puking rainbows, I had enough and ran, ran, ran…

by skinnyphatman on Apr 14, 2009 11:18 AM EDT reply actions

Lil Wayne, Nelson Mandela, and the London Philharmonic.

by gosouthgohard on Apr 14, 2009 11:22 AM EDT reply actions

I have a feeling that the members of Lynyrd Skynyrd would not enjoy that dinner pairing.

by Jesus on Apr 14, 2009 11:22 AM EDT reply actions

With a special section honoring the singular achievement of Bobby Collins, but only if located in University Park.

by yoyofutbawl on Apr 14, 2009 11:28 AM EDT reply actions

Pete Carroll, Peter Gabriel, and Erin Andrews

by oc phil on Apr 14, 2009 11:29 AM EDT reply actions

i do wonder what MLK jr would think of sweet home alabama.

mine would be rahm emmanuel, roger williams (the puritan dude), and thom yorke.

by adam b on Apr 14, 2009 11:35 AM EDT reply actions

Actually, Hunter had dinner with all of them last night. But Coach Meyer told him not to tell anyone yet. It would ruin the surprise.

by MaconDawg on Apr 14, 2009 11:46 AM EDT reply actions

Chazz Michaels Michaels, Elvira, Mistress of the Dark (you always remember your first love), and its a tie between Issac Newton or George Washington Carver.

by meatybob on Apr 14, 2009 12:14 PM EDT reply actions

Evan Williams, Jim Beam, and Bear Bryant

Wait….that’s one.

by Bourbon Marinade on Apr 14, 2009 1:22 PM EDT reply actions

Ted Williams, Will Campbell and Jerry Garcia

by bill_lee's_bong on Apr 14, 2009 1:39 PM EDT reply actions

I think it is a bit geeky that I know that the CBS people at LBL aren’t adjunct faculty at Cal, and that UCLA has a really good accelerator physics group, because I know people in both groups.

That said, I must commend Orson for his timely Chuck Norris joke. Tomorrow give us the Macarena. That’ll be a hoot.

by GTSteve on Apr 14, 2009 2:05 PM EDT reply actions

George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison

by John on Apr 14, 2009 2:09 PM EDT reply actions

GTSteve, that comment would have only been geekier if you would have added “glaven” at the end. Now get back to destroying the world by accident.

by Kerwin4two on Apr 14, 2009 2:52 PM EDT reply actions

willie williams, bill clinton, the band

by jim james on Apr 14, 2009 3:32 PM EDT reply actions

(Nearly dead) Coach John Wooden, (nearly dead) Billy Graham and the (deceased) Scoutmaster of my old Boy Scout troop.

by Wozzo the Wonder Dog on Apr 14, 2009 3:58 PM EDT reply actions

JoePa, Hunter Thompson, Jimmy Page

by psuphiman80 on Apr 14, 2009 4:00 PM EDT reply actions

Doyle Hargraves, Peter Dinklage and a Victorian Armoire.

by sonofsamford on Apr 14, 2009 4:22 PM EDT reply actions

Hey Rick, maybe Marshawn and Desean just weren’t interested in playing for a .500 team.

by AERose on Apr 14, 2009 5:19 PM EDT reply actions

Tim Couch, Aundrey Bruce, and Kwame F’in Brown. I always wanted to know what it was like to be a #1 bust.

by BuddyColtrane on Apr 14, 2009 8:02 PM EDT reply actions

For the record, Marshawn Lynch is from Oakland and he chose Cal to be near his family (he moved his family to Buffalo with him when he went to the NFL). Desean Jackson had good grades and a good SAT score coming out of high school. Academically, he could have qualified at any school in the country – including Stanford.

Neither Lynch or Jackson ever had any interest in going to UCLA. The UCLA coach is a repeat offender liar.

by dajo on Apr 14, 2009 9:07 PM EDT reply actions