We think if you name a child “Sal Fasano,” the infant just sort of comes with a mustache like this attached in a helpful carry-on bag for later use. (HT: sal
Happy Mustache Wednesday, Motherfuckers!

We were going to put new Purdue coach Danny Hope in here, who has continued the tradition of wearing a Cuban Soup Filter while coaching the Boilermakers, but we spaced on his name in the Sporcle “How effectively can you demonstrate your inability to properly remember names of Division 1 football coaches?” quiz. Without being a total dick and cheating, we got an 86; for further context, info-bot and acknowledged genius Hinton got a 102, but we blame the differential on us filling those data slots with more important things, like essential lines of dialogue from Buttman’s Wild Goose Chase. Joey Silvera never got enough credit for his fine performance in that work.