EDSBS JEOPARDY: WHAT IS YOUR MOTHER TREBEK?
Q: “What is Frank Beamer’s balanced breakfast?”
A:
Q: “What is Jonathan Crompton?”
A:
Q: “What is the name of UConn coach Randy Edsall’s blue-ribbon winning Boston Terrier stud?”
(The judges would also accept “Carson Palmer’s favorite soda.”)
A:
Q: What are the current contents of Mike Patrick’s pockets?
A:
Q: “What was Les Miles’ only line of dialogue as an extra in Bob Guccione’s 1979 remake of Caligula?
A:
Q: “What is the answer to the classic MENSA test question ‘How much does a pound of feathers and a pound of lead and Charlie Weis weigh?’”
A:
Q: “What was Jim Tressel’s last shout before collapsing into unconsciousness on a Shreveport riverboat deck? (At a craps table, sadly)”
A:
Q: What is the one song that can make Tom O’Brien cry like a scalded baby?
A:
Q: “What is ‘Lou Holtz’s That Donkey Won’t Hunt’?”
A:
Q: “What are the contents of Howard Schnellenberger’s Disaster Readiness Kit?”
A:
Q: “What is painted in flip-flop glitter acrylic on the back of Ron Zook’s jetski?” Judges also would have accepted “What is the Robert Palmer song Steve Spurrier feels best describes him, even if he knows “Simply Irresistible” is probably everyone’s answer.”
A:
Q: “What is Jarrett Lee’s new job description?”
(Co-written with Holly, of course.)
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1
Bobafet7 says:
THE PENIS MIGHTIER!
March 24th, 2009 at 12:41 pm
2
drexyl says:
It sounds like a fine product Trebek. If it works I’ll buy a dozen!
March 24th, 2009 at 12:48 pm
3
Crabapple Buck says:
Tressel would never bet on anything blue. Other than that, the rest are spot on.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:00 pm
4
Mr. Pelican Pants says:
“I’d like to go with The Rapist for 100, Alex.”
Turd Ferguson
March 24th, 2009 at 1:04 pm
5
gatorphunk says:
No less, anything ORANGE and blue. And therein lies the problem.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:04 pm
6
JIMatUA says:
Well, the game is afoot. I’ll take anal bum cover for 7,000.
I’ve spent five years of my life trying to invent an anal bum cover, failing to do so is my greatest regret.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:07 pm
7
Mr. Pelican Pants says:
“Orange and Blue, smells like a horses ass and Ripple?
What is Auburn? or the artist formely known as Tony Franklin?
March 24th, 2009 at 1:09 pm
8
swampchomp says:
Nick Saban is upset because his buzzer didn’t work fast enough, but he didn’t have time for this shit anyway
March 24th, 2009 at 1:12 pm
9
Philip says:
“Modern Home Economics. An Introduction to Sociology. An Abbreviated Introduction to Sociology.”
What are books sold by Glenn Coffee?
March 24th, 2009 at 1:31 pm
10
southernmost says:
I’ll take Jap Anus Relations for 100, Alex.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:37 pm
11
yoyofutbawl says:
Alex, I’ll take Potpourri for 1,000.
A. This creature has an IQ of a Gila Monster and the verbal skills of a hyena, coupled with a bright coat
Q. Who is Corinne Brown, Alex?
Right, Bob. Gradulations on your right answer. And, oh – GO GATOR
March 24th, 2009 at 1:54 pm
12
PeteJayhawk says:
That entire thing reads strangely hilarious if you read it as Q and A starting with the headline.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:55 pm
13
AERose says:
A: Cato the Elder’s most famous saying.
Q: What is Ceterum censeo USCinem esse delendam?
Correct! The English translation, “furthermore I advise USC should be destroyed” would also be acceptable.
March 24th, 2009 at 2:05 pm
14
Brian O'Blivion says:
I’ll take “College Football Pundit History” for $1000, Alex.
A: Six.
Q: What was the number of Beano Cook chins in 1998?
March 24th, 2009 at 2:21 pm
15
DC Trojan says:
AERose @ 13 – a curious thing to ask, given that Aeneas was a Trojan and the father of Rome. Allegedly.
March 24th, 2009 at 2:47 pm
16
Coop says:
@ 11
We would have also accepted Maxine Waters.
March 24th, 2009 at 3:03 pm
17
MaconDawg says:
@ Petejayhawk at 12:
Yeah, especially the sequence Q: “What is Jonathan Crompton” A: “Rape”. As Tennessee fans and Owen Wilson’s character from Wedding Crashers will attest, it’s funny because it’s true.
March 24th, 2009 at 3:14 pm
18
yoyofutbawl says:
Coop-
Or Jocelyn Elders talkin’ about that great musician, “Eric Clapner, who’s going to play here tonight”.
Maxine’s still too busy asking if the Mars Rover was going to bring back any moon rocks.
March 24th, 2009 at 3:28 pm
19
Sue E. Pig says:
Weis comes in at a svelte 576 these days, huh? Guess he’s been dieting.
March 24th, 2009 at 3:50 pm
20
hlh says:
A. This well known comedienne was born in a Tennessee wilderness and moved to Los Angeles at an early age. Has not been employed.
Q. Who is Ellie Mae Clampett?
March 24th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
21
Holly says:
Jesse Palmer’s the rape soda afficionado, not Carson. We regret the error.
March 24th, 2009 at 6:29 pm
22
DC Trojan says:
Quite right Holly, Carson Palmer’s a cornhole enthusiast.
March 24th, 2009 at 11:19 pm