CURIOUS INDEX, 3/16/09

by Orson on Mar 16, 2009 9:26 AM EDT

But you said it would disappear and I'd run right through it... IF YOU BELIEVE THAT WALL WILL MOVE AND YOU SHALL PASS THROUGH UNHARMED.

(Paige is fine, by the way. CRAZY OLD TESTAMENT GOD APPROVES YOUR EFFORT. Crazy Old Testament God also applauds Al Davis' tenacity in wanting a head for an eye, making up law on the fly, and for helping retake the low road of high stupidity. Also, Al and COTG are real tight from back in the day, when Al was better known as "Nebuchanezzar."

Chip Kelly's gonna run a tighter ship here. As Mike Bellotti steps down to deal with thrilling things like building schedules, budgets, and alumni donations, Chip Kelly steps up to make things harder, better, faster, etc as spread option guys seem to do: quicker practice sessions, more direct involvement across the board, a new coffee enema cannon in the locker room (with Swoosh logo, natch,) and no more "three strikes" rule for disciplinary infractions.

A smoky departure. Torrey Davis, he of the two goal-line tackles in the national title game and emerging potential after much trouble in his first two years at Florida, has instead opted to haze his future, fog up the defensive tackle position at Florida going into spring practice, and has sounded the BONG of the bell tolling to end his career as a Gator. Stay high, Torrey, and best of luck. The Daewoo is warmed up and ready out back.

Barnhart returns. Nothing new inside as he's catching up, but MY THAT'S LARGE FONT. The AJC, now embracing the large-print crowd to appease the last people reading newspapers: the very, very old.

R.I.P., Dan Brown. The Boise State alum and Fresno State defensive coach dies after a two year fight with brain cancer.

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Comments

I disagree, sir. I don’t believe you’ll be sending Torrey Davis away in a Daewoo unless you have a shoe horn and a vat of Crisco to get him in it. And a spare engine to put in the damned thing.

By the way, Omar Hunter is taking over for Davis, but Urban Meyer told him not to tell anyone.

by MaconDawg on Mar 16, 2009 9:47 AM EDT reply actions

We refer to this Daewoo specifically.

by Orson Swindle on Mar 16, 2009 10:00 AM EDT up reply actions

U…C…L…A… is on the big board

http://www.bruinsnation.com/2009/3/14/797217/e-j-woods-s-trouble-early

by Nestir on Mar 16, 2009 10:20 AM EDT reply actions

I think the AJC Got Tony’s Blog and Furman Bischer’s TV Typewriter pages mixed up.

Bischer’s readers need the automatic Font sized large.

Non-smart ass Side note…. hit ctrl and your mousewheel to change the font size.

by crane on Mar 16, 2009 10:37 AM EDT reply actions

With Neuheisel teams it’s only a matter of time before they start winning on the field and harassing women off of it.

by Yossarian on Mar 16, 2009 11:06 AM EDT reply actions

Are we sure the Paige kid is OK? Rumor has it that since he came to he has had a fascination with full-service gas stations and is thinking about transferring somewhere to a warmer climate southeast of Knoxville.

by yoyofutbawl on Mar 16, 2009 11:49 AM EDT reply actions

At first it didn’t, but on reflection everything about Chip Kelly fills me with dread. Like I think Kevin Riley will be lucky to escape Autzen Stadium with his head attached to his body when Cal makes the trip this season.

by AERose on Mar 16, 2009 1:09 PM EDT reply actions

What the fuck does some Japanese piece of shit have to do with anything? Torrey Davis, you’re fucking out!

by Kenny Powers on Mar 16, 2009 1:15 PM EDT reply actions

Why was I not suprised that the ball the guy caught when he hit the wall was thrown by
Crompton? That kid is comedy gold, he could be the next Jarret Lee. And as a nice touch for the AJC, the article had nice links at the bottom for “brick wall cleaner”
When I read the headline and saw that it was a UT player, I instantly thought Coach O had picked the player up and tried to throw him through a brick wall. Hell, he sacked Robert Lane and made him a TE.

by Mr. Pelican Pants on Mar 16, 2009 1:22 PM EDT reply actions

I saw a craigslist ad that Marcus Thomas is looking for a roommate; apparently “Scoop” hasn’t been paying his part of the rent. So I guess that works out for all of them.

by Big Jon on Mar 16, 2009 3:29 PM EDT reply actions