ANDRE SMITH'S SECOND RUN WAS BETTER

Nice job as always, Freek — now I want to see Andre get lapped by the guy with the walker in the opening credits of “Office Space.”

John Hannah and Dwight Stephenson could not be reached for comment. Although Hannah’s answering machine did make passing reference to “that [pejorative term for femal genitalia and/or young cat] Andre.”

Pete Carroll’s Facebook Status – Pete Carroll Loving The Doors’ “Back Door Man” today…"

I know a little too much about Mrs. Carroll now.

Thank god FreekVision (all rights reserved) is still not an HD station.

I can now comfortably say I look better shirtless than a first-round NFL draft pick.

Freek – best work yet. I’m going to wash my eyes out with chlorine now.

FC update. New Mexico is on the board, who smacks his girlfriend around because, wait for it, SHE caught HIM with another woman.

The police report says that she claims that he hit her in the face with a closed fist. There were no marks or bruises. Strange.

Maybe this vid of Tuberville could be tweaked to include Andre.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IQELY3beHM

hobeg8r,

sounds like someone needs a new strength and conditioning coach.

Gawd Lawdy Almighty watch that man flesh jiggle and wiggle ahm gonna hurl!

Man. Do I want to know if once he got the inertia of his extra body mass going, did it keep going after he stopped running and how fast was it’s forty?

Definitely in need of a mega-sports bra, der Brah!

How much will his lateral speed moves be slowed down on each reverse by that mass of jello wanting to conserve momentum?

Andre Smith: “MAN, its hot in here!!”

NFL Scout: “yep, we are trying to guage your sweating reflexes”

AS: “Really?”

NFLS: “yeah, specifically we are looking for ounces of water shed per ambient degree F per pound of player mass”

AS: (scratches head)

NFLS: “anyway, you’re next in the 40”

AS: “mind if I take my shirt off? I’m burnin’ up man.”

NFLS: "you sure about that? no one else is doing it, and I’m not sure it will help your draft status. "

AS: “whatever, I’m all athlete” (takes shirt off)

NFLS: (scribbles furiously in notebook)

AS: (starts running)

Smith’s Flesh: (undulates)

NFLS: (gets a cup of coffee)

AS: (stops running)

NFLS: “5.28!!”

AS: (scratches ass)

Purorambo for the mark & olly reference. And whatever the opposite of purorambo is for seeing Andre’s Ampleflesh.

The manboobs were not attractive. But, I am sure the Lions will take him first.

Go Tate!

I especially like the guy kneeling on the right close to the finish line as he starts…and when Smith gets that shit moving he has second thoughts and gets the freaking hell outta there!

Thru my Crimson Tinted Glasses™, I could have swore that was Ronnie Coleman doing the 40….now if I take my glasses off, I can see Andre has been drinking several hundred 40’s…..That Malt Liquor will pack the weight on….I bet he will be on the Biggest Loser..oops, wait, he already is……in millions of dollars…..I guess obesity is really a disease, or you just cant fix stupid. GUARANTEED MONEY =FAIL!

I really think everyone should leave him alone. If his actions caused him to lose in the draft then that is something he has to worry about. I don’t think people are drafted on the way their bodies look. I also don’t think he won the Outland Trophy because he had a banging body. LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!!