FULMER CUPDATE: HOGS GO SHOPLIFTING
by Orson on Mar 11, 2009 1:16 PM EDT
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PrintAWWWW. So cute when a seagull does it, so not when it's a 200 pound linebacker doing it. Arkansas linebackr Ryan Powers engaged in illegull activity when he stole something of value in Fayetteville, Arkansas on Tuesday. Condoms? A flat-screen television? Thank you notes? Batteries for his metal detector, which has helped him lose weight and led him to countless buried treasures on the beaches of...Arkansas? There's no telling, really, at least not until we get a detailed police report. This being Arkansas, we know that the full burden of the amateur legal community is being brought to bear on a FOIA request for this very document.
One point for Arkansas in the Fulmer Cup standings, building on the point total amassed by Ryan Mallett, who will be up at 6 in the morning and in bed by 11 p.m. according to Bobby Petrino thank to his public intox arrest. (Early bird specials, Ryan. They're a lifesaver.)
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Shoplifting? Arkansas?
I’ve got a “Peter Gammons” says it took place in Wal-Mart. Who wants that action?
Also…. "The Razorbacks had gone several months without a player arrest until recently when quarterback Ryan Mallett was charged with public intoxication March 1. "
Um, Congrats?
by GamecockTony on Mar 11, 2009 1:41 PM EDT reply actions
That video was even more awesome when I first saw it in 1982.
by 1982 called and wants its video back on Mar 11, 2009 2:06 PM EDT reply actions
It was that or one of the other four overused videos of shoplifting or songs about shoplifting. If you would like to make a new one, preferably of you stealing something and then being brutalized by the police, we’d welcome it. Send it to harumphharumph@gmail.com! Yesterday!
by Orson Swindle on Mar 11, 2009 2:11 PM EDT up reply actions
O,
I’m guessing “Jane’s Addiction” was too obvious?
I once had a squirrel steal an open bag of M@M’s out of my golf cart. I chased him across the tee box to no avail.
by GamecockTony on Mar 11, 2009 2:19 PM EDT reply actions
A flying seagull once shit in my friend’s mouth. He had it coming…
by EZ on Mar 11, 2009 2:36 PM EDT reply actions
Quick question Orson,
Are you phasing out the “Fulmer Cup” tag? and if so to what purpose? I haven’t seen it in the past few updates.
That tag was the only reliable resource I had for finding out if you’d already tabulated points for FC scores before I sent the links to you.
I mean, unless you like it when all of us keep sending you the links to the same story over and over again….
by CincySooner on Mar 11, 2009 2:40 PM EDT reply actions
Quick question Orson,
Are you phasing out the “Fulmer Cup” tag? and if so to what purpose? I haven’t seen it in the past few updates.
That tag was the only reliable resource I had for finding out if you’d already tabulated points for FC scores before I sent the links to you.
I mean, unless you like it when all of us keep sending you the links to the same story over and over again….
Forgot to mention good post! Looking forward to reading the next one!
by CincySooner on Mar 11, 2009 2:57 PM EDT reply actions
Cincy Sooner – he’s doing it that way so he can avoid awarding Carl Johnson any points. That keeps the Gator thugs flying under the radar. You know how those Gators homers are. ARP! ARP!
But you are right, it is hard to make sure that the points are being correctly tabulated. I just wish all of the “mainstream” news outlets would add a Fulmer Cup tag to their story-lines.
by hobeg8r on Mar 11, 2009 2:59 PM EDT reply actions
Seagulls are nothing more than airborne rats with tinier brains. I’ve always been amazed how a french fry in the road makes them think they are more bad ass than a moving vehicle.
by General Disarray on Mar 11, 2009 4:01 PM EDT reply actions
Gamecock Tony….
Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner on the scene of the crime. For fairness, there is a Target in Fayetteville but I guess their stuff is not as “shiny” as Wal-Mart’s stuff.
by Jim Grizzle on Mar 12, 2009 12:48 AM EDT reply actions
Ummm…Orson?
Someone just ninja’d my screen name (see post #10 vs post #8). Judging from what they linked my screen name to, I’d guess they are trying to sell metal detectors, but I dunno… I’m too scared to click the link.
pay no attention to the supposed double-post…
by CincySooner on Mar 12, 2009 9:14 AM EDT reply actions
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