CURIOUS INDEX, 3/9/09

by Orson on Mar 9, 2009 9:41 AM EDT

Burn Down The Mission. Bring your family down to the riverside, and watch Martin Fennelly suggest we put the flametorch to their keep:

The race with Joe Paterno is over. Paterno's late rally has him up 383-382 in all-time wins, but Bobby might have to fork over victories, perhaps as many as 14, and that's all she wrote unless Joe Pa was using steroids from 2002 to 2005.

Fortunately, Joe's been snorting pure nandralone for years, and can still power clean his weighted unit of choice, one Jay Paterno. Florida state will appeal, with FSU President T.K. Wetherell saying vacating wins makes no sense. An allergy to shame is a great thing to develop sometimes. Really, it is.

Nick Stephens, out. The qb race at Tennessee gets a bit simpler as Nick Stephens breaks his wrist high-fiving an overly excited Ed Orgeron. There's also no bending over at Tennessee now, or at least not until they come to Gainesville in September.

Your OCs are our graduate assistants. Mike Groh, former Virginia OC, is but a mere graduate assistant as a grad assistant.

Urban talks some shit. In case you wonder what sort of household Urban Meyer grew up in, it was one of those Catholic households where you could say "shit" as much as you liked, but a single "fuck" would have you eating your dinner on the porch no matter the temperature outside. That's our guess, since Meyer's speech to coaches in Fogelsville, PA contained somewhere between five and five thousand uses of word "shit."

Updates pending: Fulmer Cup blue-chippers Marshall have a pair of charges on the board, and Jamar Hornsby is Jamar Hornsby, even if you put him in a different state.

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I always loved the Orwellian/Soviet notion of vacating wins. I suppose one should go burn the news transcripts and any programs or pictures that exist of the games as well.

Or else the NCAA will send a very angry letter.

by Techie on Mar 9, 2009 9:48 AM EDT reply actions

urban knows that if it’s good enough for the aussies, it’s good enough for him.

by kleph on Mar 9, 2009 9:52 AM EDT reply actions

I guess someone needs to explain to T.K. that FSU’s “lack of institutional control” is the reason why Bobby played ineligible players.

by hobeg8r on Mar 9, 2009 10:11 AM EDT reply actions

JoePa wants to know if you can hear that… or maybe he should turn it up?

by CincySooner on Mar 9, 2009 10:14 AM EDT reply actions

On the plus side, when the NCAA writes up its report, it can cover the “Lack of Institutional Control” finding with a simple link to YouTube of T.K. speaking with the comment, “See?”

by DevilGrad on Mar 9, 2009 10:15 AM EDT reply actions

Nick Stephens breaks his wrist high-fiving an overly excited Ed Orgeron…
Fortunately for young Nick Stephens, the staff had the cattle prods and tranquilizer darts handy, or that simple excitement would have turned into a feeding frenzy where his arm would have been ripped from the socket and devoured for an afternoon snack.

by skinnyphatman on Mar 9, 2009 10:30 AM EDT reply actions

Who needs Nick Stephens when we’ve got JC 3.0?

Also, no bending over because as a coach of mine once said, “Losers lean.”

by etsuVol on Mar 9, 2009 10:39 AM EDT reply actions

I was unaware there was any other kind of Ed Orgeron.

by Harris on Mar 9, 2009 11:13 AM EDT reply actions

nice.

And who wouldn’t would pay to witness JoPa reenact that scene during a post-loss press conference?

by NativeSon on Mar 9, 2009 11:37 AM EDT reply actions

Fun thing about a reFSU appeal…they’ll need to bring in evidence not currently on record on which to base their appeal, but, if it’s not on record, that opens the doors for an additional Notice Of Inquiry and potentially more violations and even more embarrassment/penalties/forfeitures…how cool is that?! I’d love a seven/eight year reFSU Cheating Scandal Investigation and News Debacle.

by sb on Mar 9, 2009 12:23 PM EDT reply actions

So how many points does Ole Miss get now?

by Houston's Nutts on Mar 9, 2009 12:40 PM EDT reply actions

Re: Al Groh

http://blog.al.com/rapsheet/2009/03/nick_saban_hires_former_virgin.html

Based on the URL for the al.com story, I thought this was going in a very different direction.

by JD Hogg on Mar 9, 2009 1:40 PM EDT reply actions

@10 Yeah, I was wondering about that. Their argument in the appeal is but, but, but we didn’t know they were cheating. I assume the NCAA already knew that before ruling.

by Brian O'Blivion on Mar 9, 2009 1:56 PM EDT reply actions

I have heard the ncaa finessed this one pretty well…the penalties aren’t even set…they are within specific guidelines, but can be reapportioned dependent on which way reFSU goes. They want to keep Blobby’s ill-gotten wins, then the scholly redux increase. They want to build for the future with minimal scholly redux, then throw your “championship” legacy and the old fart away with it and start clean.

The smoking gun, should they desire to pull him out of the closet, is Goldsmith/finger/field (some name like that) who is the presumed link between the acad advisory board and the coaching staff…it seems that the reality must be worse than the presumption of complicity because they are making sure Goldxxxxx stays away from the ncaa, and wonder of wonders, it appears it is only he who could be trotted out to refute the existing charges. Check-mate.

by sb on Mar 9, 2009 2:25 PM EDT reply actions