MUSTACHE WEDNESDAY: NOEL MAZZONE
Your Mustache of the Week is Noel Mazzone, receivers coach for the Jets and currently in the running for the Wannstache’s OC spot.
Bravo to the Pitt paper, which includes this fine passage when analyzing Mazzone’s key weaknesses:
It just lends further credibility to the rumor that Wannstedt isn’t actually a football coach, but an old-timey villain sent to Earth to conquer our planet by assembling the finest grouping of mustachioed men the universe has ever known. If Mazzone is the hire, the staff is only a guy with one of those mustaches that curls up at both ends and wears straw-boater hats away from forming Megazord, but with an unbelievably large mustache.
Happy Mustache Wednesday, motherfuckers.
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1
Rick Shaeffer's Stylist says:
I really hope Razorback defensive cord. Willy Robinson at least gets a mention this year. He shaved his beautiful stache before the season last year in some kind of rebellious act against Bobby Petrino. Petrino immediately denied him permission to wear his “free mustache rides” t-shirt and called him a mother fu**in pussy. But this year, the stache is back and that means trouble for SEC offenses. You heard it hear first.
February 18th, 2009 at 4:31 pm
2
psuphiman80 says:
Joe Tiller laughs at Wanny’s attempt to duplicate Mustachioed Men of Purdue Football’s sideline.
February 18th, 2009 at 4:50 pm
3
Bunkie Perkins says:
Hire this guy and be relegated to only kicking field goals…which at Pitt may be a progressive step.
February 18th, 2009 at 5:02 pm
4
Ray says:
Wooly Willy approves.
February 18th, 2009 at 5:29 pm
5
Coop says:
3 is right.
Mazzone falls into that category of recycled coordinators that you see pop up at a different school every 3 or 4 years, and the reason they get hired is that nobody really good is interested in the job and the coach wants to play it safe. Sort of like MLB managers or NBA coaches that get hired 3 or 4 times and nobody understands why as it was not an upgrade. Bill Belichick is the exception, not the rule. They settle for, in all likelihood, mediocrity to avoid potential failure.
The above model is similar to never changing your bets in blackjack and playing for hours on end. Sooner or later, you know what will happen.
February 18th, 2009 at 5:32 pm
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Mr. Pelican Pants says:
When I look at that pic of Mazzone, I just want to tell him to add extra cheese and pepperoni for no extra charge, or I’m going to Pizza Hut.
February 18th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
7
Godfrey says:
I’m pretty sure this is the first ever rodeo winner I’ve actually met. I’m really excited. When once asked about the tendency of coaches to cover their mouths while calling plays, he simply replied “just grow one of these.” And we all wanted to. But couldn’t.
February 18th, 2009 at 6:36 pm
8
MomsPartyShop says:
Pitt soon to be in the ‘Zone. I will never forget that NC State game where he had first and goal to win the game and he ran three plays with trips wide. He is an offensive rocket surgeon.
February 18th, 2009 at 9:03 pm
9
AERose says:
Mr. Mazzone is out of the running as Wannstache decided to poach Cal’s OC instead and I say GOOD RIDDANCE AND WE NEVER LIKED YOU ANYWAY AND WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP STEALING OUR COACHES GODDAMNIT WE JUST WANT TO GO TO THE ROSE BOWL.
I’m OK. I’m OK, I’m cool.
But yeah, Frank Cignetti doesn’t have a mustache, so I don’t know where he stands with regards to Wannstedt’s plans for world domination.
February 18th, 2009 at 10:48 pm
10
JimHalpert says:
It must be good to know that if his career takes a dive, he can fill in for that guy on Intervention.
We’re here because we love you….
February 19th, 2009 at 12:47 am
11
SteveInHouston says:
Given events of the past couple of days, I’m really surprised that this week’s award didn’t go to Allen Stanford.
February 19th, 2009 at 5:48 am
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Brady Quinn, Medicine Woman says:
I will not rest until Vince Guaraldi gets his Moustache Wednesday due:
http://www.amazon.com/Person-Vince-Guaraldi/dp/B000000Z40
You think I won’t play the upright bass while dressed as Pigpen until that happens? Believe me, lawya, I will.
February 19th, 2009 at 7:20 am
13
Alfonzo S. Tangerine says:
It’s spelled “NoRedZonne,” actually.
February 19th, 2009 at 7:45 am
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Chip Ramsey says:
Coach Mazzone is a good guy. Very cooperative with the media when he was at Auburn. And, love the stash, too!
February 19th, 2009 at 8:04 am
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CincySooner says:
the writer of that article is 100% correct…
it’s only a matter of time before the Pitt coaching staff shows up on the sidelines wearing the afforementioned hats, candy-striped vests, and wielding white-tipped canes. Add to that the offensive fireworks on the football field and you’d think it was 1926 all over again.
February 19th, 2009 at 8:30 am
16
PJMatt says:
11 – I couldn’t agree more strongly. THis is Sir Allen’s week.
He even has an appropriately creepy tie College Football, as the “corporate sponsor” of both LSU and Ole Miss’ cheerleader
February 19th, 2009 at 12:05 pm