CURIOUS INDEX, 1/21/2009

by Orson on Jan 21, 2009 9:16 AM EST

This truck is bullshit. Rich Brooks has his own custom F150, a marriage of "the toughest truck" now bearing "the toughest coach's name," according to Paul MIller Ford of Lexington's website. The whole thing appears to be done in a paintkkake of blue, white, and more blue, and will feature Brooks' signature on the tailgate and door panels.

The Les Miles Swamp Buggy (with eight sets of truck nuts,) the JoePa Lincoln Town Car All-White Edition, and the Mack Brown Convertible Stretch Caddy with Longhorns as Hood Ornament will all be soon to follow, we're sure. Oh, and The Lane Kiffin Power Wheels Set, too. NO LANE NOT THAT FAST!!!

(Add: the Frank Spaziani "WarioKart," a roofless SmartCar with racing tires and increased turn radius for tight Boston parking jobs.)

T. Boone Pickens, honorary UGA Bulldog today. T. Boone Pickens pulls Bill Young out of the DC spot in Miami, presumably for his work on the fine Kansas defenses of recent years and not for his work on the crumbly, flaky tastiness of this year's Hurricanes. Randy Shannon, now operating without an offensive or defensive coordinator, makes a quick triangulation and notices Miami alum Willie Martinez sitting at Georgia, where he can be gotten reasonably cheap thanks to a lackluster 2008 and Georgia fans' eternal case of the grumbles re: his zone schemes. Willie Martinez then becomes the leading candidate to replace Young. T. Boone Pickens earns an honorary degree from Georgia, and we're all full circle back where we started now.

"Um, that? It just didn't happen." Mike Sherman was going to build the Aggie offense around Mike Goodson, but...um...yeah.

At his season-ending press conference, Aggies coach Mike Sherman hardly wanted to discuss why Goodson wouldn't be back, and why a year ago Sherman had said he wanted to build the offense around Goodson.

"We wanted to, but we didn't," said Sherman, whose first team finished 4-8. "We tried to, but it just didn't happen."

It's all part of a piece paralleling Goodson and Dante Hall, a parallel hinting that Goodson's attitude was TEH BUTTSTANK at A&M and that he'll be a steal in the draft. But does he have his own day at ESPN? Pizza for EVERYBODY!!! (HT: BON's Bevo's Daily Roundup.)

Low low low low low low low. Syracuse's former offensive coordinator is working as a graduate assistant at Tennessee. It's bad. This bad:

Browning, who was a part-time coach at North Carolina State from 1980-81 when UT defensive coordinator Monte Kiffin was head coach there, must be accepted into a graduate program before he can officially begin work as a graduate assistant with the Vols.

Syracuse football: it's like getting AIDS in your career. On the upside, he can get that forensic anthropology degree he's always wanted to get, and work hands on with real, decomposing bodies at the Body Farm, all of which would be more life-affirming than whatever happened to Mitch Browning at Syracuse under GERG.

Pete Carroll, Twitterer. Pete Carroll has joined the world of micro-blogging. Will report when the first #winforever tag occurs.

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The Urban Meyer “Pope-mobile”. [Since everyone knows ND is his dream job].

by hobeg8r on Jan 21, 2009 9:31 AM EST reply actions

The Steve Spurrier “Chokemobile”. Runs out of gas every year in the middle of October. However, twice daily it announces that the correct time is 56 to 6.

by yoyofutbawl on Jan 21, 2009 9:37 AM EST reply actions

A roofless smartcar sounded too stupid/awesome to exist but leave it to those wacky Brits to not only take the roof off but those cumbersome doors as well.

http://www.parkers.co.uk/imagecache/file/630/archive/smart/Crossblade/crossblade3.jpg

begs for a Spaziani Freekjob.

by drexyl on Jan 21, 2009 9:38 AM EST reply actions

In the mean time L’Orgeron is still parachuting to work in the mornings.

… and he doesn’t even have a plane; he just runs to the office with an open chute flaring behind him.

by CincySooner on Jan 21, 2009 9:46 AM EST reply actions

The UGA honorary degree for T. Boone MAY be premature. According to the Miami Herald, Shannon may appoint himself DC. Dawg fans, step away from the ledge.

by hobeg8r on Jan 21, 2009 9:49 AM EST reply actions

Re: Mitch Browning

Rita: "Believe it or not, I studied 19th century French poetry.

Phil: “What a waste of time! I mean for someone else that would be an incredible waste of time. It’s so bold of you to even choose that. It’s incredible. You must be a very, very strong person.”

by DevilGrad on Jan 21, 2009 9:52 AM EST reply actions

The Pete Carroll Ferrari (complete with spinners)…because year after year we are all told it is the greatest car out there but we all know that as soon as there is the slightest bit of uneveness in the pavement it is likely to break down. Great for driving around and picking up 5 star tail (backs) but better left in the garage at the beach house when real work needs to be done in early January.

by Phocion on Jan 21, 2009 9:53 AM EST reply actions

Don’t forget about that Nick Saban Panzer/Urban Assault Vehicle.

by Bob Loblaw on Jan 21, 2009 9:53 AM EST reply actions

Why not try the “pre-loved” Cadillac Bobby Bowdenmobile? It hasn’t had an oil change since 2001 and it’s only hanging on to set the all-time miles driven record, but everyone says with a little work it could be a dream machine in just another year or two. Yup, any year now…

by Year2 on Jan 21, 2009 9:54 AM EST reply actions

I want a Tim Tebow edition Toyota Prius complete with daily random bible versues that are displayed on the nav. screen and recordings of Tim’s voice reading them to you before you can start the car. Save yourself and the earth at the same time!

by ALGator on Jan 21, 2009 9:59 AM EST reply actions

Mike Riley’s blog just gained 300 yards rushing agaisnt Carroll’s.

by Counter Trap on Jan 21, 2009 10:06 AM EST reply actions

Randy Shannon special edition ‘73 Chevy Impala on 28’s. Engine sold separately.

by NOLAcane on Jan 21, 2009 10:08 AM EST reply actions

The Mark & Katharyn Richt Signature Edition Volvo V70. Big, deceptively quick, boring as all-get-out, but after last season’s injury-fest we need something safe as a fucking house.

By the way, thanks for introducing me to the YouTube subculture of Grown Men Driving/Crashing Power Wheels Over Angry Death Metal. Now everyone else at work is wondering why I’ve been laughing so hard I nearly peed my pants.

by Doug on Jan 21, 2009 10:09 AM EST reply actions

Too bad Pete couldn’t convince Sanchez not to got to the NFL in 140 character bursts…

by www.southbendblarney.com on Jan 21, 2009 10:18 AM EST reply actions

Don’t for get the coach Stew hillbillie deluxe:

http://www.gwcmodela.com/hillbilly1.jpg

by Noel Devine's Gold Teef on Jan 21, 2009 10:35 AM EST reply actions

I think it would be the Urban Meyer edition Nissan GTR. Faster than the regular GTR and more robotic.

by Tractorr on Jan 21, 2009 11:09 AM EST reply actions

- Groundhog Day reference?

Bobby Petrino’s magically always has a full tank and can never be turned off once started.

Mangino/Weis…RV…super duty suspensions etc….

by OhioDawg on Jan 21, 2009 11:13 AM EST reply actions

I would imagine that Saban would ride Cerberus

by haybeav on Jan 21, 2009 11:24 AM EST reply actions

^^ Me have bad English.

by haybeav on Jan 21, 2009 11:30 AM EST reply actions

After hearing Mike Sherman’s press conference, the Auburn University Athletic Department quickly released a statement:
“We hope you all share our enthusiasm for what looks to be a very exciting 2008 season of Auburn Tiger Football, built upon a controversy-free year, a new vibrant offense, another strong Bowl appearance, and another year of a long, loving tenure of Tommy Tubberville and his staff. No, we said 2008. Yes, Really excited.”

by Terry Tate, Office Linebacker on Jan 21, 2009 11:41 AM EST reply actions

How can you forget about Houston Nutt and his BatMobile?

by Mr.Pelican Pants on Jan 21, 2009 11:51 AM EST reply actions

Mike Leach has been calling Disney Studios for years trying to purchase The Black Pearl or that ship they used as One-Eyed Willy’s in Goonies…

by Terry Tate, Office Linebacker on Jan 21, 2009 12:01 PM EST reply actions

Come on, Mr. Pelican Pants. We all know that Houton Nutt’s car is a 1978 Dodge Charger with a Sheriff paint scheme and a fuckin’ siren on the top. Oh, and a basset hound named Flash in the front passenger seat.

Giggity.

by fresh on Jan 21, 2009 12:15 PM EST reply actions

Or Jim Tressel’s 1955 Buick Special. It’s got all kinds of cool features, but it takes waay too much gas to go anywhere, and it can’t get up over 55, due to the fuel shortages.

by MikeLew on Jan 21, 2009 12:18 PM EST reply actions

I noticed no mention on Rich Brook’s awsome truck of one of those girly-man tail gate steps. RB thinks girly-man steps are bullshit! And Howie agrees.

by cities were great on Jan 21, 2009 12:24 PM EST reply actions

I forgot to mention, Jim’s ’55 Buick Special is getting driven around in the Carter administration

by MikeLew on Jan 21, 2009 12:26 PM EST reply actions

1. I suspect that Mark Richt, given his prior endorsement, will soon be the proud owner of a magic carpet from Carpets of Dalton.

2. Really, an honorary degree is nothing. He could get a real one by driving past the arches with his window down.

by Sherlock's sidekick on Jan 21, 2009 12:55 PM EST reply actions

Sherlock, i’m actually surprised mark richt doesn’t have one of these himself. I saw enough commercials with him talking about how tough they were, but maybe the Mark Richt Mobile is just too much for him. As for the honorary degree comment, two points: 1. ARCH. singular. we are the university of georgia, not mcdonald’s. and 2. lewis grizzard would be proud at your reference to one of his more memorbable jokes. he was one funny mother fucker.

by hailtogeorgia on Jan 21, 2009 1:50 PM EST reply actions

Bob @ 8: The Nick Saban Panzer/Urban Assault Vehicle may look impressive when driving around the flat lands of the south (with the exception of Monroe, LA for some reason) but it apparently crashes and burns upon entering mountains such as those in Utah.

by oc phil on Jan 21, 2009 2:25 PM EST reply actions

Everyone laughed at first, but after five seasons, the Beamer Edition Fiat Nuova 500 has conquered the ACC. First the ACC, then actually winning a BCS game, then…uh…I guess we’re still working on this part.

by Woekie on Jan 21, 2009 4:10 PM EST reply actions

#29
You ever tried to drive a Saban Panzer thru Utah Mtns with two flat left tires? Then the spare tire is also flat? And after getting everything patched up and a tow by AAA, the tow truck gets hit with an RPG from those pesky insurgents? Then you call in an airstrike on the enemy, and then for some reason via friendly fire, end up shooting you to pieces because the plane was piloted by SJPW?
Who ever said Murphy’s Law was make believe, watch that game, and it was a law that we couldnt break…….

by Mr. Pelican Pants on Jan 21, 2009 5:13 PM EST reply actions