Let’s not kick Thom Brennaman OK let’s kick Thom Brennaman. Well-dissected by the Czabecast.

SAAAAAANCHEEEEEEZ!!! Mark Sanchez appears to be sort of leaning towards having an inclination to preferring to go pro, a market made a bit more lucrative for Sanchez by the staying-put of Sam Bradford. If you saw Bradford’s press conference, btw, his hair looked especially poofy, prompting TCOAN to go “Whoa! Cromag!” when she walked by his visage on the tv.

HAAAZELTOOO–notquitethesameeffect. Another departure from USC, but for entirely different reasons, is Vidal Hazelton. Hazelton will move to Cincy, which “is only five hours driving from Georgia”…if you’re a pussy not driving a REAL NON-PUSSY’S TRUCK.

Also returning: Ed Awesomename. Ndamukong Suh of Nebraska will return, ensuring that the hardest fucking name in all of college football gets another year of use. According to Nebraska’s entry on Suh:

In the Ngema tribe in Cameroon, Ndamukong means “House of Spears.”

Until someone comes along with a Lingala name meaning “Tribe of those who Crush Skulls with Their Bare Hands and Make Women Beg For Panting, Ecstatic Mercy,” Suh is the title holder.

Les Ford, Danny Miles. DawgSports believes Les Miles is the modern incarnation of the wacky/wily Clemson coach . Miles is a very different man, we believe, if only for the reason of him being completely and totally insane, as opposed to working in half-measures of crazy like Ford.