CURIOUS INDEX, 1/7/08

by Orson on Jan 7, 2009 9:51 AM EST

Buenos dias! It's Miercoles en Miami. "Miercoles" is Spanish for "Wednesday, or the day when we get cranked on coffee so strong it spasms your asshole, climb in a car, and scream at each other on I-95 for eight hours before a dinner of five starches, a meat, and then rum." It is also the day before the national title game in Miami, meaning we'll have updates of varying importance throughout the day. Hey, a huge drink! (Hint: Twitter is fun and informative! For instance, learn the upmarket rate for stripper sex in-house on South Beach, or at least what Oklahoma fans pay.

Excellence in planning: Oklahoma's staying at the Fontainebleu down here, the newly redone resort which, while not exactly in the heart of South Beach like your humble correspondent, is still close enough to be potentially distracting:

While the Sooners are staying in the upscale part of South Beach at the luxurious Fontainebleau which, according to Taylor, must be pronounced Fon-ton-blue to get the full effect the Gators are being stowed away in Hollywood, Fla., at the equally impressive Westin Diplomat.

The Gators arent watching celebrities run the streets, and not as many beautiful women parade around in skimpy clothing.

Hey! Bethany Joy Galeotti from One Tree Hill lives there! Acknowledge here celebrity, Gainesville Sun, or be destroyed by the wrath of hundreds of fans! The Fontainebleu also provided the backdrop for the opening scene of Goldfinger, where Sean Connery got his chauvipigmanbeast on with barbaric suavity:

We're looking for an all-terrycloth manjumper to wear there tonight like the one Connery sported in the scene, too. Avert your eyes, universe.

Um, strike, redact, yes. Or, if you prefer Sooner Fox News over Gator Pravda: it's
strictly a business trip.

Percy Harvin status: Ruptured aorta, cirrhosis of the eye, an angry spleen, lymphatic depression, and holding steady at 90%. (Which is sort of how Percy Harvin's always been, so thus a bit of a non-story for Florida fans, who have vast experience with the drama.) But that's okay: according to him, Florida has 38 players who can run 4.1s, so it's okay and shit.

And three days after blogs said it: Hey, everyone's a national champ!

Off to pick up my credentials--THE FOOLS!!! MUHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHHAAA

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more bad news for florida – lil’ wayne was on skip bayless’s show, and it appears that OU is getting the coveted lil’ wayne endorsement

http://espn.go.com/video/clip?categoryid=2564308&id=3814076

lil’ wayne did stop short of saying OU is flier than beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice

by okiedomer on Jan 7, 2009 10:15 AM EST reply actions

Jim Litke (from that last link) doesn’t know how to count, which is great since 2/3 of his argument hinges on his bad numbers.

He claims Texas and USC are both 13-1 (which would match the winner of the MNC game)…interesting seeing as how they both only played 13 games total (including the bowl).

by ameed on Jan 7, 2009 10:32 AM EST reply actions

ameed -

Maybe he went to Texas A & M and is including the spring game.

by Crabapple Buck on Jan 7, 2009 10:35 AM EST reply actions

So who would play in a +1 game this year? Tomorrow night’s winner and Texas, USC or Utah?

by OhioDawg on Jan 7, 2009 11:02 AM EST reply actions

OhioDawg-

In a +1 situation, I see the two semi games as Florida vs Utah and Oklahoma vs. USC, with the winner meeting in the +1.

No matter what, Texas would have gotten screwed, but c’est la vie.

by gosouthgohard on Jan 7, 2009 11:11 AM EST reply actions

Dude- enjoy Miami. It rocks there. You should definitely hit up CroBar- it’s wednesday which means the place should be packed for $9 beer nite…

by Terry Tate, Office Linebacker on Jan 7, 2009 11:34 AM EST reply actions

Whoa! OU is focused and full of catch frases! we’re f’d!

from the Sooner Fox News:

“Different team, different year, different outcome, Harris said.

He has a motto. WTLG. Win The Last Game.

“Thats why were going to go out and play, excuse my French, a hell of a game.

(In other words, “Goodness! We’re hosed.”)

by dogtown gator on Jan 7, 2009 12:28 PM EST reply actions

gosouth – That’s what I would’ve thought.

How would a playoff system handle what happened in the Big12 south this year with three teams with one loss, that everyone was raving about?

In retrospect, it’s easy to say Tech was overrated, but before the loss, I don’t think many people would have said that UC(incinnati) or VaTech were more deserving to get into a playoff, even though they won their conferences.

My point is not that a system with any flaw has to be rejected, but rather that the incremental “improvements” don’t achieve the goal of crowning an undisputed nat’l champ, and so are pointless distractions that benefit only the WWL.

by OhioDawg on Jan 7, 2009 12:36 PM EST reply actions

OhioDawg-

I disagree that an incremental improvement would be pointless. As I’ve said before, the current system crowns an undisputed national champion in one (1) case only: if there are two undefeated teams going into the national championship game, no more and no less. A +1 (or “four team playoff” if so inclined) at least has a sporting chance at resulting in consensus.

by gosouthgohard on Jan 7, 2009 12:52 PM EST reply actions

Also, a +1 would result in additional awesome college football without completely discarding the current system.

by gosouthgohard on Jan 7, 2009 12:54 PM EST reply actions

It is good that Percy Harvin is only 90% healthy. A 100% healthy Harvin would cause a rift in space that would allow the beast with a billion backs to enter our universe.

by Anonymous IV on Jan 7, 2009 1:14 PM EST reply actions