HAIR SMACK: JOE HADEN HAS IT

by Orson on Jan 5, 2009 12:39 PM EST

Florida cornerback Joe Haden either does hair-taunting properly in a Saturday presser, or he's a huge fan of obscure proteins:

Photo: Tricia Coyne, Gainesville Sun.

And yes, Brandon Spikes said this:

"They are a step slower. It will be different for them when they see the speed of our defense," Spikes said.

Brandon Spikes is also the father of time, author of Tristram Shandy, an accomplished auto-gyro pilot, dandy man-about-town, and was the second president of the nation of East Timor. We question nothing the man says, does, or thinks as long as he keeps intercepting passes with his telescoping go-go-badass arms.

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I coached Brandon in high school here in NC and we nicknamed him “big baby”. He is a great kid but geeez Brandon know when to shut the hell up! If any of you are around the program tell him that coach Brown is going to come thump on his head like he used to do in practice.

by FatDaddy on Jan 5, 2009 12:59 PM EST reply actions

crystal ball shows a lucrative flowbee endorsement in mr. haden’s future.

by brady quinn, medicine woman on Jan 5, 2009 1:01 PM EST reply actions

Was that Defense faster than Manningham and Avant last year? Is Oklahomo slower than that? Isn’t speed relative? Did Trent Morgan run down Percy Harvin from behind? How about Utah? How fast are they? What was the question again?

by Elno Lewis on Jan 5, 2009 1:06 PM EST reply actions

Well in the press conference he said it wasn’t saying we were number one, but rather that just being in the title game meant… yeah, I don’t know either. I think Joe Haden found out after his haircut that UF is #2 in the BCS.

by TJ on Jan 5, 2009 1:11 PM EST reply actions

i think he just forgot to hold down the shift key and meant:

BCS!

by etsuVol on Jan 5, 2009 1:32 PM EST reply actions

A powerhouse is not simply complete until it talks felonious amounts of smack off the field and then makes all your worst nightmares come true in proving it on the field. Florida did it in 2006, and will probably do it again in 2008. Messieurs Spikes and Haden are merely continuing that long, proud tradition.

by poguemahone on Jan 5, 2009 1:40 PM EST reply actions

Morgan Trent?

by Tron on Jan 5, 2009 1:56 PM EST reply actions

What a bunch of bullshit! The press conference link is below. Where exactly did he say,

They are a step slower. It will be different for them when they see the speed of our defense,

Watch It.

http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid1511793040?bclid=361569315&bctid=6095175001

by Mich-Placed Gator on Jan 5, 2009 2:14 PM EST reply actions

Quoted here, MPG.

by Orson Swindle on Jan 5, 2009 2:16 PM EST reply actions

…and before any shitheads put words into Tebow’s mouth, here the offensive press conference:

http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid1511793040?bclid=361569315&bctid=5831485001

by Mich-Placed Gator on Jan 5, 2009 2:18 PM EST reply actions

Brandon Spikes is also the father of time, author of Tristram Shandy, an accomplished auto-gyro pilot, dandy man-about-town, and was the second president of the nation of East Timor.

He is also the star of probably my favorite moment of the year.

Also, where’s the love on Auburn hiring Trooper Taylor?

by WarCardinals on Jan 5, 2009 2:19 PM EST reply actions

I guess since Ted Hutton ( thutton@SunSentinel.com ) put quotations around it must be true then. Wonder how many bong hits he just completed before “hearing” that….which clearly isn’t present in the Press Conference footage.

http://www.sun-sentinel2.com/blogs/images/mugs-g3/hutton.jpg

by Mich-Placed Gator on Jan 5, 2009 2:24 PM EST reply actions

ARP! HAIR GO GOOD WITH CROC JORTS ARP!

by vegas_buckeye on Jan 5, 2009 2:31 PM EST reply actions

I see that BCS1 is studied in Saccharomyces cerevisiae. The microbe most responsible for my (and I suspect others on here) humor. In a way.

by jakldawg on Jan 5, 2009 3:30 PM EST reply actions

HOLY Google Search, Batman!

I’ll save everyone time. BCS1=yeast= Saccharomyces cerevisiae

Yeast is what ferments beer.

get it. got it. good.

by Mich-Placed Gator on Jan 5, 2009 3:44 PM EST reply actions

That’s a mohawk on top with numbers/letters on the side. Now THAT is a fashion statement. I can appreciate the BCS part – but a mohawk? Leave that to USF.

by hobeg8r on Jan 5, 2009 4:51 PM EST reply actions