CURIOUS INDEX, 12/18/08

Strictly for speculative purposes only. Subject to change. Florida 41, Oklahoma 30. That was our pre-coffee guess for the national title game. Take it to the bank! Preferably one about to become insolvent and rollying belly up to the FDIC!

We feel a little better about this bet thanks to all new completely unsubstantiated but still delectable rumors of academic ineligibility for one or possibly two of Oklahoma's players of note. Tim Tebow, having handed in the papers and tests he's supposed to for the semester, is is filing other paperwork. Richard Dawkins wants to know why he doesn't just ask God where he's going to go in the draft.

Cue Handel's Messiah. Tennessee's associate head coach Ed Orgeron is "leaning" toward Tennessee. We think they mean "slouching" toward "Bethlehem," but that's inconsequential in the light of LEMME GET DAVAAAHLS ANASSFIRE TAH WARMTHEAMBISHONS BY DACOACHO ISSA BAAAAAAAAAACKK!!!!

We're mailing a whole dead boar to the football offices in Knoxville just to make sure we get off on the right foot with this site's spiritual peltfather.

Mark Dantonio's not talking about Mark Dantonio. Mark Dantonio displays some impressive third person talking skills in a piece about his connection to Cincy where he coached before Mark Dantonio's stint at Michigan State. Mark Dantonio has this to say, but it's not about Mark Dantonio.

"It wasn't about Mark Dantonio," he said. "It never is. It's about each individual that was there. I knew they would go on. And I knew Mike would hire a good football coach."

It's one line, but it is also another brick in the wall of crazypants evidence we're collecting on him. He's mad as bats and would bite plates in half to prove a point. Mark Dantonio thinks we're taking this a bit too seriously. Mark Dantonio's going to eat a bagel and watch some film.

12 minutes; 8.69 plays. That is the bite the 40/25 clock has taken out of college football this season. The Wiz blames increased commercialization; we, as always, blame Oceania, who we have always been at war with and vow to defeat any minute now.

The sort of fair, nuanced commentary you expect from the NFL commentariat:
From Pro Football Weekly, via Blutarsky:

“If you look at the Bobby Bowden, Mark Richt, Chuck Amato family tree, there is no discipline whatsoever. And if the players don’t have natural strength, they are not strong. There is no substance to their strength programs. With the type of talent they have at Georgia and Florida State, they ought to be in the hunt for national championships every year. I don’t know why Richt is not fending for his job.”

Also heard from an NFL wonk to our ears at the draft last year: "Mario Manningham is a slam dunk. Oh, and [NAME REDACTED] is gonna have a great year at Indiana." Everyone lives in a filthy, ignorant village; some are just glitzier than others.

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