ARKANSAS NOW DICK-LESS

by Orson on Dec 18, 2008 10:41 AM EST

Headline writers of the world, take a bow:

No word on whether this was an intimate moment between Petrino and the qb, a slow, thorough affair where the two stretched it out and really took a hard look at things before the final release, or whether they just whipped out the thing and took care of things that needed to be take care of before they became unbearable. Dick has release...for the moment.

The swift release of Nathan Dick comes in the shadow of Ryan Mallett vying for the starting job, and is a good move for all concerned: Dick the Younger was pulled for Casey Dick, Dick the Elder, in the season's final game against LSU. He went on to throw the game-winning TD, embarrass his younger brother, and show the universe what it looks like when you get the right Dick in the right place: you score, and score deep THEY'RE TRANSFERRING DAMMIT WE'RE GOING TO DRIVE THIS INTO THE GROUND WHILE WE CAN.

In conclusion, DICK DICK DICK DICK DICK DICK DICK.

(HT: Dave.)

(Dick.)

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Well, it looks like there was room for only one Dick in Arkansas, and Petrino’s it.

by BamaTaxMan on Dec 18, 2008 10:44 AM EST reply actions

To me, nothing will top the headline on the story about Houston Nutt benching Robert Johnson and giving Casey Dick his first start against South Carolina three years ago: “Nutt pulls Johnson, starts Dick against ’Cocks.” Swear.

by Doug on Dec 18, 2008 10:46 AM EST reply actions

The articles’ writer?
Why, Robbie Neiswanger, of course.

by GamecockTony on Dec 18, 2008 10:50 AM EST reply actions

It’s a good thing he left— in the battle of Dick vs. Mallet., Dick never wins.

by PW on Dec 18, 2008 10:51 AM EST reply actions

I thought most Dicks that got released to another team were the causes of many divorces….or being released after the divorce…..

by Mr.Pelican Pants on Dec 18, 2008 10:57 AM EST reply actions

I love the headline of the article on the ‘take a bow’ link….

UA Women Rested, Ready?

I think these writers are reading too much porn in their spare time

by InsaneCoachPosse on Dec 18, 2008 11:01 AM EST reply actions

All time best was year before last:

“Nutt Disappointed in Dick”

by Rzbker1974 on Dec 18, 2008 11:04 AM EST reply actions

Nathan Dick is feeling rather shafted, but he should have seen it coming.

by Signal to Noise on Dec 18, 2008 11:06 AM EST reply actions

My dick certainly got released after my divorce.

by Mich-Placed Gator on Dec 18, 2008 11:08 AM EST reply actions

Insert Tebow/foreskin joke here.

Sorry, I just couldn’t help it.

by Counter Trap on Dec 18, 2008 11:12 AM EST reply actions

that’s a lot of dicks.

/ashamed

by vegas_buckeye on Dec 18, 2008 11:34 AM EST reply actions

What a dick move.

by GTgradstudent on Dec 18, 2008 11:44 AM EST reply actions

How many dicks is that?

(HT: Mr. Blue.)

by Jackwraith on Dec 18, 2008 11:45 AM EST reply actions

Mystery Man Mugs Mimes With Meat-Millions Make Merry. Bad newspapers live for this sort of thing.

by maskedavenger on Dec 18, 2008 11:48 AM EST reply actions

Guess they won’t have use for this handy tool anymore…

www.youtube.com/watch?v=phyJCyRWRuc

by skinnyphatman on Dec 18, 2008 12:29 PM EST reply actions

maskedavenger @ 14 – and they write the headlines on Banana Jr 6000s.

by DC Trojan on Dec 18, 2008 12:32 PM EST reply actions

@16 – I appreciate the Banana Jr. reference.

Gene Simmons bought one, didn’t he?

by gatorphunk on Dec 18, 2008 1:09 PM EST reply actions

Well, at least we’ll have Mike Hunt to pick on next year.

by yoyofutbawl on Dec 18, 2008 1:37 PM EST reply actions

Not only did Dick the Elder embarrass Nathan in the LSU game, but Casey also had to go and get engaged to a girl named Felicia. That’s right, boys. Felicia Dick. How in the hell will Nathan be able to top that?

by Mr. Shuler Goes to Washington on Dec 18, 2008 2:21 PM EST reply actions