CURIOUS INDEX, 11/25/08

“Marky M about to drop some bombs on that shit, best believe.”

Is this really gonna happen?… don’t play with me Orson.

Peter Kerasotis’s profile picture makes me want to beat the ever-loving shit out of someone.

Urban Meyer in South Bend is, at best, a drug-induced fever dream. His somewhat indifferent attitude towards player discipline notwithstanding, the school would be on the hook for something like $100 million between Meyer and Weis. I’d love to see it happen but it just won’t.

I don’t know if oversigning coaches is such a good idea. If you sign 8 coaches, I think you’re more likely to have 8 guys calling plays while yelling over each other instead of 7 guys getting ran off before the season started. There might be a touch of ego at that place.

But it would make for a reality TV show I might actually watch.

So ND will not only buy out the rest of Charlie’s 100 year contract, but also pay Urban $4-5 million / year? Apparently their money is greener and shiner because they’re printing it themselves.

Mizzou has a hiring freeze in effect right now. They had to save money somewhere for Pinkel’s raise.

This seems like a bad time, economically speaking, to ask the subway alums for 9 digits. Looks like Charlie’s most decided schematic advantage was in bluffing NFL interest to panic the ND AD.

I feel the walls rumbling . . .

Notre Dame can pull this off. All they need to do is form a bank holding company, contribute the athletic department to it, and then request a federal bailout to get rid of their toxic assets. (Hey, if Amex and insurance companies can do it, why not a college athletic department?)

I’ve recommended a similar strategy for Miami U.

That meyer to southbend article scares the shit out of me. However implausable the board thinks it is I still awaken from a fever nightmare at the prospect of another coach. What if we had to hire another name redacted. Sweet god why?!

Y’know, reading about NCAAF humor isn’t as much fun when your team sucks nuts and you somehow got talked into flying across the country to see them get a “style points” cornholing as 29 pt dogs.

I really thought the Xs and Os mastery of the “jump ball to Golden Tate/Floyd” offense was going to take off this year.

Fuck it. I might as well buy my Independence Bowl tickets and hope I get knifed to death in Shreveport.

7

Rumor has it that Hank Paulson has been called by ND for the Weisbank bailout and it’s a done deal. The USG gets 10% ownership of ND and mandates that all opponents will have to play them blindfolded for the first two quarters to make things more fair (EEOC mandate). Losses will be 90% absorbed by the USG, so if ND goes 2-10, their actual record is 11-1, assuring the USG of BCS split w/ ND every year.

With LSUFreek handy, why do we have to imagine “Savion Glover’s body and Mack’s head”?

Get that slacker going! Hep! Two! Tree! Fawr!!!

DJLYSOL: Don’t worry. You’ll still go 3-1 vs Georgia.

Oh and THWGT

The mental image of Mike Leach in the front row on the opening night of Twilight surrounded by a couple hundred tweens fills one with a feeling of…not incongruity, at least.

As a resident of Brevard County (home of the Florida Today), I am sad to say that this is the kind of article that is typical of Kerasotis. The man’s a douchebag. He’s a Florida Alum and tries to use that to shield himself from writing these articles to “stir up” email responses which he delights in using in subsequent articles.

His M.O. is simple; say some opinion founded on some speculative fact, wait to receive the inevitable flood of emails pointing out his frequent breaks with reality, and then pull quotes from the emails and insert them into articles so that he can paint himself as a journalist being abused for doing his job and reporting the truth.

Most people I know don’t pay him any attention, he has a track record of doing this. Please don’t anyone else get upset by this moron’s drivel.

Speaking of Les Miles, how many people in Michigan — and, for that matter, Miles himself — wish they could go back a year in time?

Meyer to Notre Dame…..Something tells me he might have trouble getting Chris Rainey academically eligible for that one…..