YES, PANIC. PANIC IS APPROPRIATE.
The promised transfer panic begins at Michigan. Everybody panic, indeed. Sam McGuffie, midget white running back, should consider transferring to Florida so that we may diversify our shades of tiny quarkbacks. (Honkie=”strange,” for your quark categories.)
McGuffie, seen here in an early photo from MGoBlog, is allegedly looking to take his Dragonball Z toys elsewhere.
This will be cited as further evidence of the disastrous trajectory of the Michigan program, proof Rich Rodriguez should NEVAH HAVE LEFT WEST VIRGINNY COCK MOUTH TRAITOR, and so on and so on. This is presumptuous, and further proof that Michigan fans happen to be hapless virgins when it comes to programmatic chaos.
Ask an Alabama fan: this shit is nothing. You’ll all be fine.
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1
Coop says:
RR is just terrible.
Michigan needs to go ahead and admit that the RR experiment is a failure, and just cut ties with him. Tear up whatever buyout or whatever he owes to WVa and just let him walk.
Go get a Michigan man and kick RR to the curb, because, again, he is just terrible.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
2
BurritoBrosShits says:
Its truly sad when Michigan fans have only the basketball season to look forward to.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
3
NDEddieMac says:
You mean my team doesnt have to get torn up by McGuffie for three more years? Fantastic
November 18th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
4
Etch Westgrin says:
Bama fan here to confirm that everything will indeed be fine. Only, in our case, “fine” didn’t come for about ten years.
Thus, if any program out there wants to reach our Shakespearian heights of snowballing hellaciousness, you will indeed be ultminately “fine” in the long term. In the short term, however, things are going to get much, much worse. I don’t want to give away the plot, but it involves a lot of flight-checking software and hiring a coach who never actually coaches a game.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:11 pm
5
Ninja Football says:
As one of the seemingly rational people in this fanbase (well, as rational as a person who photoshops Tressel burying dead hookers can be) I know we’ll be fine. It’s trying to talk all the idiots down from the ledge that’s been tough about this season.
Oh, and Coop- keep telling yourself it’s a failure, if it makes you feel better. Just remember- you can hope in one hand and shit in the other….
November 18th, 2008 at 2:19 pm
6
BamaCPA says:
Amateurs.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
7
hlh says:
Orson, I know you would love to have that “Knowshon” type leaper at UF.
But Toledo? Jeez, that kind of stank is not removed with mere soap and water.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
8
DC Trojan says:
Rodriguez has about a year. I’m confident of this because Jim Harbaugh is building a Schembechler-esque team out at the Leland Stanford Extension Campus to Cornell and is about to sign a contract extension.
This means that in 12 months, Harbaugh will be totally irresistible to Michigan: he’ll have built a team fueled by rage, with a run-first offense, a huge D-line, and an iffy secondary that can run even with USC for a half of football, proving that Harbaugh can pick up where Carr left off.
And, having a buy-out on a relatively recent contract is just the kind of seller’s market that Bill Martin lives for.
So, despite the imminent demise of the Michigan economy, count on Harbaugh coaching in Ann Arbor by spring 2010.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
9
Erik says:
I feel broken up and I’m not even a Michigan fan. I loved McGuffie.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:37 pm
10
WhiteSpeedReceiver says:
What a shame. Outside of a handful of people (like Yostal), it couldn’t happen to a nicer fan base.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
11
Bobby Decatur says:
So as Christmassy as UGA’s season has been, there’s always this…and Auburn…and UT…and WVU. Nothing like a little perspective. Getting the shit kicked out of you by a rival is the death-by-head-on car accident of fandom; programmic chaos the leukemia. If given the choice, I’ll take the headlights in my windshield any day.
November 18th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
12
Mr.Pelican Pants says:
Never bet on the white guy.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
13
Crabapple Buck says:
Things are transpiring just as I have said they would (tenting fingers, tapping them together). Wait for the blowout tOSU puts on them Saturday.
Pretty soon the Ann Arbor Kremlin will kiss and make up with Harbaugh. RR will be on a short leash. Some of his less scholarly recruits will put them high in the Fulmer Cup standings. Another meh season where there is no “spread” QB to run his one trick pony offense. A bad loss to tOSU in AA. Recruits not wanting to come and play for a team in turmoil.
They have gone down a dead end road. The only way out is to retrace their steps and start over. I will enjoy their journey to the bottom, but it is better for the Big Ten and tOSU to have a decent Michigan.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
14
Mich-Placed Gator says:
Michigan has cool helmets….too bad we want see them in a bowl game for the next 4 or 5 years.
DickRod….karma is a mutha fugga ain’t it?
November 18th, 2008 at 3:04 pm
15
Mr.Pelican Pants says:
Crabapple,
Riddle me this. As an Alabama fan, I am of the opinion that when Alabama is up, Auburn is down, and vice versa. They can never ever be equally good at the same time, whether it be recruiting, etc etc. Its really a conundrum, since I think there will never be a #1 Alabama vs #2 Auburn……
Does that same scenario play at tOSU vs Michigan?
November 18th, 2008 at 3:07 pm
16
Croc says:
Every team needs a (name redacted) experiment to make them truly appreciate what a fine coach can do.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:08 pm
17
ALGator says:
LOL… that video was fucking priceless. “Cock mouth traitor”.. hahaha……
I especially like the part where the guy is filming himself from the quiet confines of his mobile home.
Stu-fucking-pendous.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
18
PW says:
Why do people act as if Knowshon invented leaping over defenders? As impressive as his leap was earlier this year, I recall it being Ben Troupe’s trademark a few years ago and I’m sure people were doing it before him too.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
19
Noel Devine's Gold Teef says:
McGuffie, bring yo Texas ass to Motown, dog. We could be like ebony and ivory in the backfield, dog.
- NDGT
November 18th, 2008 at 3:22 pm
20
Crabapple Buck says:
MPP
While your short memory will serve you well my friend as a Bama fan, you forget that in 2006 it was #1 tOSU vs. #2 UM in a game that ESPN hyped to the point of exhaustion.
Ohio State and Michigan have been good at the same time far more often than not. It was the Big 2 and little 8 for years. This is actually an aberration where one is awful and one is good. Last time was 1988 when in John Cooper’s 1st year at tOSU, we were 4-6-1. But even then, we gave UM a hell of a game before falling.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
21
Bobby Decatur says:
Surprising editing skills for an insane person.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:29 pm
22
Harris says:
@3 NDEddieMac: No shit. I will not miss watching that mudfoot motherfucker wander through ND’s “defense” like he was strolling through the Dockers section at JC Penny.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:29 pm
23
jb says:
@2 Does Michigan really have a basketball season to look forward to? Karma is biting them pretty hard there too.
“We’re in the big time now dad” – Patrick Beilein
You sure are little buddy.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:29 pm
24
CapstoneAlum says:
Does that kid have a tattoo on his right forearm?
November 18th, 2008 at 3:32 pm
25
yoyofutbawl says:
Rich Rodriguez = Tommy Amaker.
Food for thought, Wolverines.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:39 pm
26
Coop434@yahoo.com says:
@ 25
You had me with comparing Seton Hall basketball to West Va football. But, to take it a step further, that would make Tommy Bowden = Coach K.
May God have mercy on your soul for lumping K in with such company.
Again, Michigan fans, you have all the money in the world. Just cut ties with RR and go get Les.
Call it a hunch but I am fairly confident I know of a spot that RR could/would land.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
27
Noel Devine's Gold Teef says:
From The Maybe Don’t Panic Yet Deptartment:
In defense of RR, it did take him two season to start kicking-ass at WVU. His first season was a loosing one, his second season was .500, and then the offensive flood-gates opened. Be patient. If he can get the right athletes, they’ll run circles around Big 10 defenses by season 3, if not sooner.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
28
meatybob says:
So did Meyer tell McGuffie that Harvin is moving to linebacker?
November 18th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
29
Coop says:
Apparently, I will even share my email address with Michigan fans to in an effort to pass the hat to help get RR out of town and move him back down South.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
30
Mich-Placed Gator says:
IF he can get the right athletes…
that’s an Arial Extra Bold, 75000pt font IF….
maybe I’m wrong, but I haven’t seen many High Schools up here in Michigan or around UM’s typical recruiting grounds running spread type offenses. That doesn’t mean that the right athletes can’t function in that type of offense in college, just that the learning curve is greatly increased.
Also, I’m not sure I’d want my son, nephew, neighbor’s kid, etc to take a chance and trust his future to a “cock mouth traitor” like DickRod who’s still a great big experiment; if there was better options on the table from other fine, more stable programs.
November 18th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
31
maskedavenger says:
Two years ago was the infinite hype leading up to the OSU/UM 2006 game. It seems like two decades ago. But the optimist in me just knows we are going to kick some serious MAC ass next year in the Motor City Bowl and begin our glorious comeback.
November 18th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
32
NativeSon says:
@28
Nah, that was Jevan Snead who told McGuffie that. It’s a little on-going storyline for Mr. Snead.
November 18th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
33
theniz says:
For people saying the RR experiment has failed: First. Year.
For people saying we can’t get the right athletes from Michigan/Ohio/old school pipeline states, check out the Florida athletes we’re currently plundering.
November 18th, 2008 at 4:28 pm
34
TheGreatShocka says:
I can’t wait to see the number of fatalities come next Monday when OSU fans drink for every Buckeye score. Not to say they’re anything like Texas Tech, but UM’s defense only has so much fight left in them. I figure after being down by 14, the wheels will completely come off. Even Todd Boeckman will get in on the fun by doing his best Tom Brady (pre-ACL tear) impression.
November 18th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
35
Ninja Football says:
@25
RichRod hasn’t been recruiting “typical Michigan recruiting grounds”. As I recall, we’ve already landed one of the top receivers in Florida for 2010, and are the favorite for the #1 or #2 safety in the entire nation that year as well. Perhaps you’ve heard of him, Marvin Robinson? Also from……..Florida.
The people who argue against RR and the possibility of him being a success at Michigan, what is your LOGIC? There isn’t any. It’s wishful thinking that a move of several hundred miles NW has made him forget how to coach. But I understand your hopes. The alternative is too scary for you to comprehend.
November 18th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
36
zzgator says:
Do we need to re-examine that the #1 v. #2 tOSU-UM BigTeleven-palooza two years ago might have been proven to be some overhyped BS?
Not to say that those teams have not ever been good at the same time.
November 18th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
37
Crabapple Buck says:
zzgator –
If you want to re-examine, why don’t you just split that Crystal football with Southern Cal. Now, I’m sure you don’t want to denigrate your title now do you? OK then, STFU.
Ninja –
Your rude awakening awaits you. Recruits committing to UM have been doing so withtheir fingers crossed. If I were you, I would wait until signing day. When all of Rich’s runts get hurt, since this is Big Ten not Big East football, and you have few if any backups, enjoy your mediocrity. He is a fish out of water.
November 18th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
38
lovett owl says:
@ 30, 37, countless others
to whit ,”Urban Meyer and his offense just wont be able to handle sssss eeeeeee cccccccc speed….”
this is a ridiculous argument, as ridiculous as the argument was when Meyer went to Florida. this is year one in the rickrod experiment, its just a touch to early to call it a failure
November 18th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
39
spartymike says:
Hi, I’m here for the Michigan pile-on? I’ll just watch for a while and enjoy…see how it turns out. Usually had to wait for hoops season to experience this…
November 19th, 2008 at 1:13 am
40
Ninja Football says:
Crabapple-
I think the “this isn’t the Big East” argument is a loser. He may learn he has to recruit guys biggger than McGuffie, but he’s not an idiot- he’ll adjust.
As for recruits not coming, we’re still Michigan. We can fill a class of 25 with enough talent to keep us afloat. I think my rude awakening is a long time coming- at least I hope so, this year has been hell. It must be like those last two MNC games rolled all into twelve weeks instead of two years. either way- it’ll be interesting, and I’ll be around. I love the program and CFB- not only the winning.
And to the guys asking about the tattoo, the kid was a patient at the U of M Children’s Medical Center- see bracelet on the other hand for confirmation.
November 19th, 2008 at 4:54 am
41
Crabapple Buck says:
Ninja –
Your UM arrogance is showing. Recruits aren’t beating down the doors to play at Michigan anymore. Tressel sealed the border and only lets out the ones he doesn’t want. Besides, RR isn’t recruiting the classic Big Ten player that can hold up an entiree season. If you notice, Pat Whites don’t show up that often. Even he got hurt at WfV at inopportune times. Even Urban knew he had to keep Tebow healthy and not run him as much. Florida was beaten in games that Tebow was less than 100% last year.
One thing about getting to the championship games. Those were only two losses, that followed a lot of winning, with more winning that followed. Sustained excellance that has an occasional loss. Something 117 programs every year wish they could emulate. Your season is losing, followed by a lot more losing. Keep jangling your keys, and enjoy watching the fall into the abyss.
November 19th, 2008 at 8:09 am
42
Mich-Placed Gator says:
WTF is wrong with this board, my comments aren’t being posted. One last try….
@ 37… 2 scores from the 2006 season:
Oct 28th USC 31 Oregon St 33
Dec 2nd USC 9 UCLA 13
Now YOU kindly STFU
November 19th, 2008 at 8:20 am
43
Mich-Placed Gator says:
@36 Now that we are done STFU, let’s DO re-examine 2 years ago, with this excellent video that’s actually set to the perfect tune:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8RJsxyVvPc
November 19th, 2008 at 8:23 am
44
M1EK says:
“Be patient. If he can get the right athletes, they’ll run circles around Big 10 defenses by season 3, if not sooner.”
Uh, maybe you ought to ask the one team in the Big [sic] Ten [sic] who effectively came from the Big East and still plays them a lot OOC whether there’s any comparison in terms of defense.
It’s been a LOOOOONG time since the Big East had credible defenses beyond a couple flash-in-the-pan seasons like recent Rutgers.
November 19th, 2008 at 9:23 am
45
chg says:
Wait a minute, Michigan is trying to recruit the South? But we don’t have any better athletes than the Big Ten! I know this because I’ve heard it from a thousand Big Ten fans over the last ten years, even as their coaches were talking of building pipelines to FL/GA/TX to make our leftovers their game changing playmakers.
November 19th, 2008 at 9:41 am
46
El Kabong!!! says:
I’m a little late to the party, but people were saying the Saban experiment was a failure at Alabama last year.
Most of those people were Auburn and UT fans. I wonder where they are this year?
November 19th, 2008 at 10:38 am