ILLINOIZE IN THE SYSTEM WITH [NAME REDACTED]

Jeff Allen, Illini lineman: The divergent styles of leadership fascinate me, Jon.

Jon Asamoah, Fellow Illini lineman: Me, too. Their endless variations, the ever-changing dynamics of leadership.

Jeff: I know. For instance, take my high school coach. Way more of an autocratic messiah type. Every problem was his to solve, and only solvable through his individually intuited experience, not through the input of others.

Jon: That's good in the initial phase of a crisis, but after a while didn't the team feel irrelevant to the experience? That's one of the limitations to the autocrat/messiah type. His is a solipsism functioning as the core experience of a group, a contradiction that in most group dynamics cannot sustain itself without the deleterious effects of a cult forming around it.

Jeff: That's exactly why I like these chats of ours, Jon. You listen and think at the same time.

[A gray-haired man bursts into their conversation.]

[NAME REDACTED]: YOU GOTTA GRIP THE COCK OF VICTORY CLOSE TO THE BASE!!! LIKE THIS!!! WE'RE DOWN BUT YOU GOTTA GRAB IT LIKE THIS BOYS!!!

Jon: Why thank you. You know, I sometimes feel like we have this understanding some people here don't have about leadership.

Jeff: The illusion of singular control. The myopia of authoritarianism.

Jon: Exactly! Don't for get the need to delegate responsibly and help others make sure they feel their job is both their own, and necessary for the good of the whole.

Jeff: Precisely, friend. Balance is all in this process.

[NAME REDACTED:] ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING WE ARE DOWN 20 TO WESTERN FUCKING MICHIGAN IN THE FIRST QUARTER I HAVEN'T SLEPT IN SEVENTEEN YEARS HANG CLEAN THE COCK! THE COCK OF VICTORY YOU'VE GOT TO GRAB IT BY THE BASE AND YANK, BOYS, YANK!!!!

Jon: Precisely. Intensity's just another variable in the mix a leader needs to apply.

Jeff: I'm so glad we have these chats, Jon. Is he talking again?

Jon: Talking's one word for it, Jeff.

[NAME REDACTED]: JUICE! JUICE! THE COCK OF VICTORY! WE WILL GRAB IT WITH A QUICK KICK ON 3RD DOWN TOGETHER!

Jeff: The autocrat/messiah type, you say?

Jon: Yes. Let us review our case studies after the game, and then relax with the John Adams miniseries and a nice bottle of Cotes du Rhone, shall we?

Jeff: Sounds lovely.

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