EDSBS » 2008 » November

EDSBS LIVE! BOOM OUCH EDITION

Despite being in obvious soul-agony, Peter will soldier through and make EDSBS Live happen tonight at 9:00 p.m. EDT when we will be talking with ESPN’s Ivan Maisel about the BCS, the BCS, and probably a bit about, you know, Phil Fulmer, who is very, very fat.

Listen here or be lame, because HOW BOUT THEM DAWGS ARP ARP ARP ARP!!!

FAT BOYZ IN THE BUILDING TONIGHT

Tennessee Football Offices. 11:30 a.m., November 4th, 2008.

Fulmer: Well, that does it. I’m off Atkins for the next month.

He takes a donut from green and white box. A solitary tear runs down his cheek.

PF: I just…what am I gonna do with the rest of my life?

[A GREAT RUMBLING OF BASS AND MUCH SHAKING]… (more…)

Filed under: Big 12 Conference, Blog Buddies, Coaches, the BCS, scandals, arrests, and other eccentri, College football, Marky M, Southeastern Conference, get my pies out of the oven, mmmmm ham, very fat by Orson Swindle

[ 29 Replies ]

WHILE IT’S STILL FRESH

Also, the formal, think-y take on Fulmer’s downfall at TSB. A commenter actually has a good point: The Phil Pharewell Tour commences, and could be good mojo for sending him out with a bowl trip.

Filed under: ALL THAT YOU KNOW IS AT AN END, Blog Buddies, Coaches, the BCS, scandals, arrests, and other eccentri, College football, Southeastern Conference by Orson Swindle

[ 15 Replies ]

FULMER: TOAST (ROAST?); KNS: DROWSY

I mean, of course he is. If this coaching staff had anyone left in their corner at all after treating a reeling, gutted fanbase to a full quarter of Jonathan Crompton, I’d love to hear from them.

So, here we go. It’s time; there’s absolutely no arguing that, but for a city and a team threatened by the remotest hint of change the balance of the season looms dark and our natural pessimism has finally found purchase.� Even with both feet in the FIRE HIS ASS YESTERDAY camp, I was never going to be entirely comfortable when this day came.� He’s the coach of my childhood, the devil I know.� Six weeks ago, I wrote,� “It�s our time at the edge, and the stay will be neither brief nor pleasant.”� I had no idea.

But if there’s anything to celebrate here with complete joyful abandon (for me, campers, for me), it’s that Chris Low scooped the living hell out of the Knoxville News-Sentinel, a terrible paper with a simpering buffoon of a sports editor in John Adams.� Save your preening, sir—you’ve had a public, exhausting vendetta against the guy for years and today you got beat.� ABIGAIL Adams would’ve had that story first, and that bitch has been dead almost 200 years.

Filed under: ALL THAT YOU KNOW IS AT AN END, Johnny Majors has a drinking problem, blatant homerism, crying like a bitch, death death death, harbingers, out of the blue and into the black, rub some dirt on it, you're getting personal boo by Holly

[ 47 Replies ]

STACEY DALES HAS HAD JUST ABOUT ENOUGH OF ERIN ANDREWS

Big Daddy Drew continues his media-kkake going by making a guest post today. It involves a catfight. You’ll like it because they might kiss! Buy Men With Balls today, or we’ll never do Friday Cheesecake again.

(Saturday night. Lubbock, TX)

Erin: Well, Coach, ya finally got over the hump! How happy are you for your kids? (smiles radiantly)

Mike Leach: Oh, I�m very happy for them, Erin. But you know who the real winner was tonight? Plane geometry. You see, by employing 10-foot splits between the offensive lineman and having Michael Crabtree run nothing but hitch routes, I think the children of the world tonight have finally realized what a vital role spatial targeting plays in this game.

Erin: (bats eyelashes) Tell me more. (more…)

Filed under: Blog Buddies, Coaches, the BCS, scandals, arrests, and other eccentri, College football by Orson Swindle

[ 44 Replies ]

CURIOUS INDEX, 11/3/08

Pardon me sir. I am looking for the BOOM. Do you have any, kind sir?

Brandon Spikes: YES I DO AND I DELIVER.

FREE OF CHARGE AND OPEN ALL DAY SIR. (Orange and Blue Hue explains. Brandon Spikes you are most debonair-savage.)

We don’t like to break the hearts of old men but so sad we will. The BCS standings came out yesterday. Amusing things surround this like flies around carrion. Barry Switzer announced them, a choice funny enough all by itself thanks to it being Barry Switzer in charge of an open microphone, a situation which can never go wrong.

Also funny: the decision by a pollster to vote Texas number one despite losing, proving that every week the Harris poll hands on ballot to an Orangutang named Hank at the Tulsa Zoo. Hank then takes it, cracks open a beer, smokes a Kool Light or two, and hands in one of the most thoughtful, well-composed poll ballots you’ll ever see. Simultaneously, a human inevitably fucks up and does something like putting Texas at number one. You keep rocking, Hank.

Oh, and Penn State does not belong in the national title game at this point, and could be rightly beaten out by two one loss teams because voters think the Big Ten is crap and because Ohio State choked in two national title games in a row. This is unfair in some respects. It is also happening.

Scurrilous blog types confirmed. Unsourced, floaty, sketchy…and now all three, but in a major paper:

Based on the conversations I�m having with people around the conference, it appears it is simply a matter of time for Tennessee coach Phillip Fulmer. All indications are that the decision has been made and that the details are being worked out.

Well, if it’s out of College Football Solomon/Southern Division, then it’s fact now.

My football and politics colliding AGGIE HEAD ASPLODE. You wanna throw an egg at an Obama poster? You’ll have to go through Aggie lineman Paul Freeney.