CURIOUS INDEX, 10/30/08

by Orson on Oct 30, 2008 9:49 AM EDT

ANTE UP! Commenter Bobafet7 suggests that on Saturday Georgia and Florida solve their beef the old-fashioned 2002 way.

Florida would win this contest because with quarkbacks Demps and Rainey, we have midgets, and everyone loves hard-dancing agile midgets.

In rod he trusts. Despite suffering a compound fracture and having a rod placed in his leg, Houston wide receiver Patrick Edwards should be ready to play next season following a cart-induced horrorshow of an injury in the Cougars' game against Marshall. Yay.

Love deepens.

His fascination with ancient pirates is such that his desk features a flintlock pistol from the Bluebeard era and he often flies a skull-and-crossbones flag from Tech's video practice tower.

Yarr, captain. Regardless of what happens on Saturday, ye sail a fine ship.

We are approaching the county line between Moron and Epic Dumbass. Ronnie Wilson, the UF lineman who discharged a massive firearm in the middle of downtown Gainesville and is back on the team, is not practicing with the team. Rumors of a fight or scuffle this past weekend remain unattributed on the journalistic side, but if it's even close to true Wilson is stretching the limits of the word stupidity.

Pants, doing good around the world. Pat Dye's pants are serving the common good in the form of a charity auction for an Auburn nursing scholarship fund. The pants and contents therein were put in a display case worthy of Joseph Cornell-level surrealism:

According to Shelley Grider, development officer for the Auburn School of Nursing, the pants were cleaned and displayed in a beautiful, custom-built wooden shadow box along with Dyes recovered wallet, credit cards, car keys and an autographed copy of Lake magazine that told the story.

Pants. Does their magic have no end?

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“Houston wide receiver Patrick Edwards should be ready to play next season”

that’s what some said about tyrone prothro

by gerry dorsey on Oct 30, 2008 9:55 AM EDT reply actions

I didn’t know Jimmy Clausen was such a good dancer.

by Bunkie Perkins on Oct 30, 2008 9:59 AM EDT reply actions

Is there a link for the Leach story?

by sonofsamford on Oct 30, 2008 9:59 AM EDT reply actions

Who was the Pirate story about?

by cincyjacket on Oct 30, 2008 9:59 AM EDT reply actions

The Pat Dye pants story raises so many questions. Was Pat Dye drunk one night and decided to just take his pants off and leave them somewhere along with his wallet? Was he participating in a game of strip golf? Was it a deliverance thing where a hillbilly forced him to remove his pants and then had his way with him? Basically, how the fuck did Pat Dye’s pants and wallet from the mid-80s end up being found in the muck 20 years later?

by Biggus Rickus on Oct 30, 2008 10:03 AM EDT reply actions

/hateweek off/ – Guys like Wilson cannot change. Check out Chris Henry at the Bengals. Dumbest man alive, and willing to prove it at a moment’s notice.

Meyer sounds like a guy that doesn’t have much fun.

/hateweek on/ – The whole Florida team is a bunch of thugs like Wilson. EVERY ONE OF THEM. Hhahahahahahahahah.

Urban Meyer is a fucking ROBOT!

Die Florida, Die!

by OhioDawg on Oct 30, 2008 10:04 AM EDT reply actions

FACT: If you go to a club dressed like that and dance like that, you will not get laid. Ever.

by BurritoBrosShits on Oct 30, 2008 10:04 AM EDT reply actions

Mike Leach is a true folk hero

by nolefan on Oct 30, 2008 10:08 AM EDT reply actions

What about Pat Dye’s flask? I would wager he wanted that back.

by Crabapple Buck on Oct 30, 2008 10:10 AM EDT reply actions

In the Wannstache’s profile in Sporting News Today:

“Bookmarks: cnn.com and, especially for practice preparation, accuweather.com”

Next time for your practice preparation, you might want to think about creating a game plan that Mike Teel can’t septuple his TD pass count against.

by GroundZeroEastLansing on Oct 30, 2008 10:21 AM EDT reply actions

Swindle!

You’ve got Alabama St. over Bama 24-10? Are you high? How awesome would it be for an HBCU to beat Alabama?

by Silver Britches on Oct 30, 2008 10:29 AM EDT reply actions

How does one tell who is winning during a dance off? I have trouble telling who is the servee and who is the server.

by socalbryan on Oct 30, 2008 10:30 AM EDT reply actions

@Biggus – I think they fell out of a fishing boat. Someone, I’m sure, has the link.

@Crabapple – a real man never takes one hand off the flask. I’m sure it made it back to shore.

Ironically, his wallet was the one thing Pat Dye never learned to tie on.

by GamecockTony on Oct 30, 2008 10:30 AM EDT reply actions

That’s Ark. State, and we had them reversed. Corrected now.

by Orson Swindle on Oct 30, 2008 10:31 AM EDT reply actions

Re: The mystery of Pat Dye’s pants…He’d been drinking a little and met up with that Red Stripe guy.

by beast in 'bama on Oct 30, 2008 10:32 AM EDT reply actions

socalbryan,

I always assume it isn’t the douchebag white guys.

Gamecock Tony,

If that’s the story it’s a lot less interesting than I was hoping.

by Biggus Rickus on Oct 30, 2008 10:33 AM EDT reply actions

Ah. Well then maybe I’m high. Looked like Alabama State’s logo though. KNOWSHON. KNOWSHON. KNOWSHON. KNOWSHON. KNOWSHON. KNOWSHON. KNOWSHON. KNOWSHON.

by Silver Britches on Oct 30, 2008 10:34 AM EDT reply actions

Orson and Co.,

I find it inexplicable that the phrase “everyone loves hard-dancing agile midgets” in the Danceoff portion wasn’t hyperlinked to this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gx-NLPH8JeM

Please make the appropriate changes. Thanks.

by ugacrow on Oct 30, 2008 10:48 AM EDT reply actions

Obligatory “1% of 1%” reference.

Oh, and ARP.

by Darkknight on Oct 30, 2008 10:49 AM EDT reply actions

Hey bitches, I’m back
There is a proper name for
The quarkback- “Scat back”

by SEC Haiku on Oct 30, 2008 11:41 AM EDT reply actions

Now, I’m not telling you to go around challenging other kids to dance, but when they challenge you, you just look ’em straight in the eye, and give ’em this.

Course, the Gator fans would probably come back with Sister Hazel.

by chg on Oct 30, 2008 11:54 AM EDT reply actions

As far as Patrick Edwards and his Magnificent Flexi-Leg…

I had a compound spiral fracture in my leg at the same place back in the day. Had 4 pins in my leg for about 6 months. Now, the leg didnt do quite as much of a snappy motion, thank god, but I was still able to downhill ski race the next season, so I think this guy has a definite shot at being healthy, though nothing is in the bag by any means. Also by the way, that leg right there, most painful injury you can sustain, let me tell you. You can still imagine the pain months after it goes away. It’s heinous.

by Brian on Oct 30, 2008 12:46 PM EDT reply actions