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PIPED-IN MUSIC OFFENDS THE LORD (UNLESS WE LIKE IT)

You know an issue has gained popular momentum if a columnist writes about it--usually meaning a pressing issue, like their golf game ("my short game's off!), their ex-wives ("still demanding money ow my back!"), or their yard ("Darn crabgrass!"). Finding something you sympathize, much less agree with in a regular columnists' mailbag should be a point of great concern, and a sign that your personal development has a. advanced directly to the age of 48, or b.) that you should consider taking up a hobby to become more interesting, like a fierce cocaine habit, for example.

We may have to do that after reading this in Pat Dooley's mailbag:

I agree with you about Miami where the music was too loud and excessive. I'll listen closer on Saturday, but what they really need to do is plug my iPod into the sound system. Then we'll be rockin'.

Agreed on one point: we're generally very queasy about music being played over the loudspeakers, especially because everyone's taste in music sucks except for Barstoolio's, and even then we're suspicious because we like her music, and our taste sucks. It's particularly bad because at Florida they crank up with "Thunderstruck," a middling AC/DC song at best, and then pepper the proceedings with "Zombie Nation," the aural infection that we uneasily "oh oh oh" along with when in the stands because....dammit, it works.

It works other places, too: if you've been in Tiger Stadium when they play "Callin' Baton Rouge," it works; so do a number of other songs, including "Jump Around" at Camp Randall and "Enter Sandman" at Virginia Tech. We've mentioned this before, but if they played the first 35 seconds or so of this at Florida Field...

...we'd write a check worth literally tens of dollars to the athletic department on the spot. It wouldn't bounce or anything. We're not willing to let Pat Dooley plug in his iPod yet--DO YOU LIKE TOM PETTY?--but the real test would be asking yourself: does subtracting the music lessen the experience?

In some cases, the answer is a resounding yes, though in Florida's case no one would weep if "Thunderstruck" were taken off the case completely. If you can't get feverishly excited in 90 degree heat and 60 percent humidity, you're simply not excitable, or perhaps lying on the ground twitching from heat stroke.

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Comments

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Wait, they pipe canned music into college games? I don’t think I’ve ever heard non-marching/pep band music at a UCLA game. I thought the canned music was a professional sports thing.

by Nathan on Oct 21, 2008 2:27 PM EDT reply actions  

Why cut off at 35 seconds? :42-52 is my ideal entrance music. Certainly better than Hells’ Bells or whatever they play at the Shoe these days. What is with AC/DC and teams with giant redneck fanbases anyway? Isn’t Skynyrd a little more appropriate?

Also: I’m transferring to any D-I school that plays Tom Petty over the team entrance. I’ve already got the sweatervests, I imagine that’s part of the dress code at such a school.

by poguemahone on Oct 21, 2008 2:36 PM EDT reply actions  

I would love it if they piped in “Dueling Banjos” into
Morgantown…start the game with a Hoe-Down…..not named Holly Rowe—ZING!

I think Tebow should have his own entrance with “Personal Jesus” blaring as he walks thru the smoke…..or have it where he actually walks on water, coming outta the tunnel…

And of course for Nick Saban: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_XOVh-cDtk

by Mr.Pelican Pants on Oct 21, 2008 2:39 PM EDT reply actions  

I think piped in music is an athletic department’s way of saying, “By the way, our band blows.”

by ClemsonHorn on Oct 21, 2008 2:44 PM EDT reply actions  

They play thunderstruck and Zombie nation at times at UA games. Must be the same “entertainment director” FL has…

Though, at the beginning of the 4th quarter, they play a video with “Sleep now in the Fire” by Rage with gamehighlights and the words “FINISH THE GAME” over them. I love the gimmick, but judging from bama’s 2nd halfs it ain’t workin’.

I keep waitin for them to play “Closer” by NIN, but I think they only do that at WVU

by Hook'em Tide on Oct 21, 2008 2:49 PM EDT reply actions  

@ 4

On that note, here’s the Amstutz/Mangino/Weis/Fulmer fanfare: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7w1mq6rAfMM&feature=related

by poguemahone on Oct 21, 2008 2:52 PM EDT reply actions  

I’m Casey Dickian in my accuracy, that was intended for #3

by poguemahone on Oct 21, 2008 2:52 PM EDT reply actions  

The only piped in music that should be played at Bryant-Denny is “Sweet Home Alabama” – let the MDB handle the rest.

(Oh, and could we leave the “Roll Tide Roll” out of it )

Yes, I am a cranky old fart.

by BamaTaxMan on Oct 21, 2008 2:56 PM EDT reply actions  

If playing Thunderstruck stops the UF band from playing some shit from the 50’s that has no place in a stadium where savages are smashing into each other causing life altering injuries I’m all for it. But no numetal.

by John on Oct 21, 2008 2:58 PM EDT reply actions  

I cannot tell you how many times someone has told some gullible fool that Metallica is going to actually play “Enter Sandman” live at a game. That band is almost as dysfunctional as the VT offense.

by pfhokie on Oct 21, 2008 3:07 PM EDT reply actions  

@4-

Yup. Actually, I’m all for Thunderstruck right before the kickoff, it’s cliche but it works. More than that, and it’s meh.

What’s really painful is when they pipe in some rockin’ intro and they mistime it with the commercial time out—and you get into part of a song that really doesn’t fit the vibe and the whole stadium starts to feel awkward…

by CKGator on Oct 21, 2008 3:23 PM EDT reply actions  

The name of the song is actually “Kernkraft 400”. The group’s name is named Zombie Nation.

I am ashamed of this knowledge.

by PeteJayhawk on Oct 21, 2008 3:24 PM EDT reply actions  

I’m typically not a fan of piped in music, but can’t deny I get fired up when I hear the distant gong at the beginning of “For Whom The Bell Tolls” followed by that ear-splitting riff.

by Ray on Oct 21, 2008 3:31 PM EDT reply actions  

I’m always surprised that “Slam” by Onyx never comes up in these discussions. Loud, angry, obnoxious, gleefully violent. What’s not to love? C’mon, Fredo and Sticky Fingas gotta eat.

by Harris on Oct 21, 2008 3:36 PM EDT reply actions  

For a minute there the song “zombie nation” went from my least favorite sound of all time to my second least favorite sound of all time, just on irony points, but alas it has resumed its rightful place on the list since “Kernkraft 400” sounds foreign and sucks.

…but if liking Thunderstruck makes me bad, I don’t wanna be good…

by Ltrain on Oct 21, 2008 3:37 PM EDT reply actions  

I’m all for having to play music produced by your locals. UF would have Tom Petty, UGA would rock the triumvirate that is REM/B-52’s/Widespread Panic, and Arizona State would be limited to the Gin Blossoms. Georgia Tech, however, would kill everybody in the atmosphere department, assuming they get their pick from The Dirty.

by Big Jon on Oct 21, 2008 3:43 PM EDT reply actions  

They’ve started piping in 1 rap song per game at Sanford Stadium, which kinda makes sense for pumping up the demographic of our football team. However, it is kinda awkward watching 90,000 white folks try to dance along.

by Dawg 05 on Oct 21, 2008 3:44 PM EDT reply actions  

What stadiums need pumped in: Leftover Crack, Dropkick Murphys and Horrorpops.

/my iPod loves me today.

by Der Schatten on Oct 21, 2008 3:45 PM EDT reply actions  

I’d go with the same band, but a different song. If the first 30 seconds of that song doesn’t get you fired up, you’re dead.

by Brian O'Blivion on Oct 21, 2008 3:46 PM EDT reply actions  

I’d vote for Sound of the Suburbs by the Members for USC home games, you’d hit the in-stadium irony quotient and remind the alumni of where they’ll be scurrying off to, post-game.

Sorry, did I forget to use my inner monologue?

by DC Trojan on Oct 21, 2008 4:08 PM EDT reply actions  

I still don’t understand the Baba O’Riley thing at Sanford before kickoff. “We’re all wasted!” does not make me feel super pumped about my team’s readiness to play.

by Biggus Rickus on Oct 21, 2008 4:20 PM EDT reply actions  

  1. we’d also get some Less Than Jake, Against Me! and some Hot Water Music in Gainesville. Louisville would be the big winners, they’d get My Morning Jacket – coming in to “One Big Holiday” would blow my load. Wait, this is a football blog.

by jim james on Oct 21, 2008 4:33 PM EDT reply actions  

throughout the entire 2002 season, anytime mcgahee would break one, the O.B. would rock out to ludacris’ “move, bitch” over the PA.

so wrong. yet so, so right

by lt.winslow on Oct 21, 2008 4:38 PM EDT reply actions  

Well I guess I’m the asshole, because “some shit from the 50’s” is actually what I liked. There’s precious little left of the distinction between Saturday and Sunday… (excepting, y’know, the hundreds of millions in salary)

by Rich on Oct 21, 2008 4:45 PM EDT reply actions  

I thought PSU was the only one playing Zombie Nation…..at least I know others are suffering as well.

by DanF on Oct 21, 2008 4:46 PM EDT reply actions  

Sooo, what team pipes in “Yakety Sax” during offensive plays? or “3 Stooges” theme music during pregame?

Houston Nutt:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBZDTK9Yhko

or this one also:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hwq3nNHyPI

by Mr.Pelican Pants on Oct 21, 2008 4:49 PM EDT reply actions  

Maybe it’s just that I’m jealous of FAMU’s band, but is it too much to expect UF’s band to learn some Trick Daddy. Hell, I bet Thunderstruck played over some horns and drums would sound pretty bitch’n. The more I think about it… “Thunderstuck” played by a marching band would be awesome.

This is D-1 college football. Bands need to step up. I too would write a check for tens of dollars to end the plague of ‘oh oh oh’ or any music played over speakers at UF. We’re better than that (or at least in my head).

by Dr. James H. Cubson on Oct 21, 2008 4:50 PM EDT reply actions  

@5
“I keep waitin for them to play “Closer” by NIN, but I think they only do that at WVU”

Classic!! Or they could go old school Ohio Players….FIRE!

(Sorry, couldn’t link to a Youtube clip, our filters consider that one of the more evil parts of the Interwebs and it’s blocked)

by General Disarray on Oct 21, 2008 4:55 PM EDT reply actions  

@ #8,

I almost agree, but they also need to keep playing Dixieland Delight… there’s something childishly amusing about the student section yelling after the lyrics -

“Spend my dollar ON BEER”… “Make a little lovin’ ALL NIGHT

by PeterPumpkinhead on Oct 21, 2008 4:58 PM EDT reply actions  

When I hear “Zombie Nation” start the Clemson/GT Game(and played another 5 times during the game), Turtle Wake, Bammer/Ole Miss -, UVA/UNC and played during USC/LSU…the skis are out , the leather jacket and blue swim trunks are on, and the Fonz is in the air.

Everybody get their own song and stick with it.

by Tbone in DC on Oct 21, 2008 5:04 PM EDT reply actions  

@ #27…

Georgia Tech’s Band plays Thunderstruck in the stands (granted, they also play Kernkraft 400)

by GT Fan on Oct 21, 2008 5:10 PM EDT reply actions  

@17

To elaborate evil Mark Richt has changed from “Superman that ’ho” to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bHUE41uZlM

What’s funny is to see a friend of mine from Mcdonough turn his hat sideways and holler SOUTHSIDE!, while another friend from Roswell grabs his groin and yells NORTHSIDE!

Yes, these are gray-haired men with McCain stickers on their chest.

by hlh on Oct 21, 2008 5:32 PM EDT reply actions  

#2, I hear they play Tom Petty’s “Free Fallin” at University of Washington games now

by JTG on Oct 21, 2008 5:33 PM EDT reply actions  

#29

Peter, I see your point. Kind of like our warped Christmas carol lyrics from Mallet.

Ok, grumpy old man says only “Sweet Home Alabama” and “Dixieland Delight” on the PA.

by BamaTaxMan on Oct 21, 2008 5:45 PM EDT reply actions  

I wish they cut it out, but really I’d settle for a “Crazy Train” moratorium..

by Corporate Lackey on Oct 21, 2008 6:16 PM EDT reply actions  

I’m glad it’s not limited to just the town. In Ann Arbor we’d have Iggy Pop/The Stooges (cool); Taproot (blows), and, uh, well there was a ska band there called “Donkey Punch” while I was in school there? Give us Detroit and we’ve got lots of material. We could blast “Gay Bar” every time the other team comes out, for example.

On the second thought, no. I’ll be happy with our marching band supplying the music, thank you very much.

by Yinka Double Dare on Oct 21, 2008 6:50 PM EDT reply actions  

If piped in music isn’t your bag, then stay the hell away from Clemson. It’s always some song by Lil Wayne being piped in on 3rd down, followed by their entire defense gettin’ sillay right before the snap. Talk about lame.

by David on Oct 21, 2008 7:50 PM EDT reply actions  

Naturally they pipe in music at soon-to-be-corporate-named Rutgers Stadium, but you knew that. What I don’t recall seeing before the UConn game (although I missed North Carolina and Morgan State due to work conflicts) was the students singing along – to “Livin’ on a Prayer”, of course.

Rutgers: proving what you think about New Jersey is absolutely correct since 1766.

by Devin McCullen on Oct 22, 2008 10:27 AM EDT reply actions  

I think the first few seconds of “Unchained” would be kick-ass:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FAsNUrjJXqo

by Mungo on Oct 22, 2008 12:17 PM EDT reply actions  

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